if someone says they can do better than you...

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polyphonic

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Do you believe them or think its all hype and wishfull thinking??
I am talking about competitions mind. There is someone who keep commenting and making what I would say are quite harsh judgements of me and flint, be it SJ or DR.
What is getting to me is the fact her horse is very well bred, is just 2 years younger than Flint and we have had more success before she knew us than she has ever had with her horse. I would say get on and do it herself but people call her edward (as in scissor hands as she is always sawing away rather than pushing forward with seat ontp a contact- so what she achieves is a false outline so to speak- ut correct me if I am wrong!)
Now is she saying she can do better with the horse I am currently riding and its starting to get to me. She has had her horse longer than the time I have owned flint and still seems able to judge. Am I right in thinking she may be all talk and no action.... Especially when I see her daily ride her horse. Im nothing special and neither is she- she just thinks she is. rant over!!!
 
Sounds like jealousy to me. Ignore her and carry on doing what you're doing. You know your horse best and you know whether you are doing a good job on him or not. From the pics I've seen of you and him I would say you don't have a problem getting a lovely tune out of him so Yah Boo Sucks to her!!!
 
Just ignore her Tyra!!!
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will try to BUT she stands there and its upsetting what I do with Flint- Im so worried about what she is saying that I lose concentration with Flint and we fail- maybe its a ploy!
 
She sounds like a jealous old witch to me quite honestly. What an absolute cow. Just smile and walk away. Don't rise to the bait, it sounds like she is almost trying to provoke a reaction.
 
How mean, I sometimes wish people would keep their opinions to themselves (unless of course you specifically ask for help!)

Chin up hun, she sounds nasty. Try to ignore if you can xx
 
Pete, if she is as good as she thinks she is then why is she not having the success with her own horse? If she is calling out as you are trying to work Flint & it is distracting you then just ask her to quieten down as she is disturbing your consentration. Hopefully she'll get the message, if she doesn't then you'll have to be more forceful with her.
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you might want to slip up one day and call her edward (then oops sorry that just slipped out) then leave her wondering WTF u meant!! Or be blunt and say you actually dont like her style of riding and will only take her advise when hell freezes over!! Or be subtle, engage her in conversation and drop in that you cant stand the forced out line look. Then say "although it seems to work for you, still each to their own!" either way I think she'll get the hint!!
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You've almost said yourself she's not better than you, if she has to hack away at her horses mouth to get it's head down then she can't do it.

She's just jealous.

Echo Toby_Zaphod, ask her to shh because she's disturbing you. Alternatively do the same to her when she's riding.
 
oooo who is it? being nosey now
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when i was down there exactly the same thing happened to me (might be same person?). she said that i wasnt riding her in an outline properly and offered to school her for me to "get her going correctly" and when i bought a photo of me and my pony jumping she asked why i bothered getting it as the fences were tiny compared to what she and her horse were jumping!
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in the end i just completly ignored her and if she commented just smiled sweetly at her and replied that she was my pony and i would do with her what i liked
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If she called out to me then I'm afraid then I'd just tell her to feck off and let me get on with things in my own way
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Meddling cow. Don't let her get to you, and you could always tone it down to a mind your own business if you want to keep a little bit of piece!!!!
 
Just ignore her. Take no notice and let her get on with it. Invariably people like that become a cropper sooner or later.
 
If you are prepared to risk your boy, then can I suggest getting him very revved up and then offer her a ride on him and watch her muck up totaly? Not always a good idea with a mouth sawer, but can sometimes be fun
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Next time she starts on, just mention that you are sure you would do far better with her horse, and perhaps she would like to swap! TBO i would let it in one ear and out the other, the proof of the pudding is in the eating!
 
Do the same to her!!! Stand by arena and shout your comments.....
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and when she objects, just let her know, you find it just as irritating when she does this to you!
 
Someone on my yard caught me in a bad mood one evening and was commenting on my riding in a not particularly positive way. I snapped at her saying "I know you think you are being helpful, but it's not". Suffice to say we've hardly talked since and at least the 'advice' has stopped!! Perhaps a particularly well judged comment from you might just put her back in her box! I've often been tempted in other situations to jump off and throw the reins at individual and say well if it's so easy you do it! Haven't been in brave enough (or in bad enough mood!) to do that one though! LOL
 
Who exactly does she think she is??

The words 'F' off spring to mind - And I'd say it to her face.

Cheeky mare!
 
Maybe we could all be invited to your yard and then we can stand around the arena whilst she is riding and make choice comments! Altho I think Amymay's suggestioin is the best one!
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It really makes my blood boil actually.

We (I don't mean us on here - but the horse riding world generally) love to tell others how to do it.

But she probably knows absolutely nothing about you and your horse.

Bitch!
 
Don't let her get you down!

This is an unpleasant side to horses. There will always be jealous people. Try to take it as a compliment she feels Flint is worthy of her riding. Her riding is obviously not better than yours and by the sounds of it the whole yard agrees.
 
Woo - lots of people getting upset on your behalf there Flintus.

But let's take a step back for a minute. We would all be hugely conceited if we all thought that only we could ride our horses well, and that we couldn't learn something form somebody else.

Next time she offers 'helpful' suggestions or even criticism, ask her to be very specific about how she thinks your flatwork or jumping can be improved, and ask her to demonstrate on your horse - but don't wind him up, that would be very unfair on him.

Two things can happen, either she will make an idiot of herself, or discover that he is not actually a pushbutton ride, or she might actually show you a different way of doing something that you can use in the future.

Either way, there is no point just getting in a grump about it - so let her show you.
 
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We would all be hugely conceited if we all thought that only we could ride our horses well, and that we couldn't learn something form somebody else.

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I absolutely agree. However, this doesen't sound like one of those instances......
 
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I absolutely agree. However, this doesen't sound like one of those instances......

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It may well not be, but it is hard to see any other way of drawing a line under it without it developing into a shouting match at the yard one day when Flintus has had enough of being 'helped', and subsequent bad feeling.
This is the grown up and civilised way of dealing with it - isn't it?
 
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This is the grown up and civilised way of dealing with it - isn't it?

[/ QUOTE ] Oh ok then.....
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I am actually moving yards because my YO is doing what this woman is doing to Flintus. Me being only 16 can't really do anything about it although I have had a few woprds with her hinting that I like to do my own thing. I'm not saying move yards, I am just saying maybe take her to one side and be polite about it, no embarassment or hard feelings by the end of it? Maybe she doens't even realise she is doing it!
If she persists get her on your boy to demonstrate, like mother_hen has said, she might show you something that you never thought of that you could use in the future.
 
I think if she said that she could do better with my horse to me, I'd be inclined to say "What a pity he's mine and we'll never find out"!
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Then just nod and smile every time she offers some "constructive" advice. There is always someone who thinks they can do much better than you, either in riding or dealing with your horse, isn't there? I get it all the time, but I just ignore it. As long as I'm happy and my horses are happy, who gives a damn!!
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I have a different strategy.
Either I ignore the person pretty much, so listen but 'play dead' in lack of response.
Or I agree enthusiastically (too enthusiastically) with them...'yes, you are a marvellous rider, and I know Flintus would have probably won __________ (insert unrealistic competition here) if only you'd been riding him. And yes, I am appalling; I can't keep my horse's chin in nearly as well as you can. I am sure people pay you lots of money to ride their horses for them. I'm amazed you're not a professional rider' etc etc.
The key is to do it with a completely straight face, coming across as completely earnest, and admiring. After a little while your 'helper' will start to wonder if you are taking the pi$$, but the beauty of it is, that if she says that to you, you can act INCREDIBLY OFFENDED. Either way, you can have a laugh at her expense, and gradually increase your flattery. When she rides, call all your friends across to watch, as if she were some top rider, and make appreciative noises at every twitch (or saw of the reins
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WARNING - This is Satanic advice - for kinder advice see Mother_Hen, on the light side.
 
Do you know what? I would just come out and ask her why she feels the need to comment on your riding. Don't be rude or get angry, just ask her. She will probably be taken aback for a start, but just say to her in a calm manner that you understand why she would want to watch you ride, but you find it frightfully off putting and you don't really understand the point of it.

If she still does it, smack her.
 
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