If you were a horse.....

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Ddraig_wen

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If you were a horse what would you be and how would you be described?

I think I'd probably be an acquired taste haha. Probably a Section D or large M&M type. Hardy, barefoot, living in or out and laid back 90% of the time but with excitable tendencies and a bit of a temper. I'd like to think I'd have nice movement but more likely would fail a vetting on slight unevenness behind if done in cold weather, so a price reduction would be required. Probably a bit of a one person horse but very loyal.
 
Proper hunter stamp, with more bone than you would think at first glance. Lives out but actually quite likes a nice warm bed. VERY good do-er. Affectionate and excellent to catch and load, a nightmare with vet dentist farrier and to clip. Prone to decking rider and flouncing off when not in the mood for work. Generally bombproof, excellent with vehicles and machinery, but can have stress-head days! When on form a XC machine, but has been known to put in a dirty stop when out-faced and then that's it for the day. Will actually do an inspired kur if you choose the right sound-track, but does tend to anticipate. Not a novice ride.
 
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Id be a section A, short and can be mistaken for being cute but sassy beyond belief 😂 Or perhaps a Shitland as I have been known to disappear from situations I don't like...
 
Aah these are brilliant! I'd be a TB mare for sure - hardly grows any hair, always cold even with 3 rugs on. I love showing off any injuries too!
 
Show hunter pony, good doer but feels the cold comes with large wardrobe of rugs. Opinionated and prone to occasional tantrum but wins every time out with the right team..
 
puppystitch said:
Aah these are brilliant! I'd be a TB mare for sure - hardly grows any hair, always cold even with 3 rugs on. I love showing off any injuries too!
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I was heading down the welsh types until I read this. I definitely need to be a breed where my owner will rug me up to the tips of my ears! None of that rubbish about letting them grow a natural coat, they'll keep warm if they've got forage etc etc - I want to be wrapped up in a duvet. Preferably in a stable (heated if pos).

I'd be one of those ponies that someone buys for their kid thinking its going to be a school mistress. I then would throw in dirty stops at the jumps, go from gallop to halt in a second and tank the child into the middle of a hedgerow for a snack.
 
I'd be my horse! We have the same weight issues, the same metabolic issues to the point where we are both on the same medication and both of us are quite nicely put together under the flab :lol:
 
Definately a cob. Short, fat, hairy, lazy, long mane.

Issue with picking feet up, stiff in cold weather and needs alot of physio. Incredibly food motivated. Happy hacker type, generally laid back and good in traffic but good luck getting past walk!
 
I'd be a slightly overweight, hairy cob mare, nothing special but not awful . I'd be grumpy and a bit lazy, I'd live on thin air and have a wall eye. I'd be that horse at the competition that no one notices, that they snigger at because it's just not dressage. I'd slump around and look bored and my owner would be a bit red in the face. Then the bell would go and all bets are off and we'd wipe the floor with the competition ..... Because I hate to lose....:D
 
Sukistokes2 said:
I'd be a slightly overweight, hairy cob mare, nothing special but not awful . I'd be grumpy and a bit lazy, I'd live on thin air and have a wall eye. I'd be that horse at the competition that no one notices, that they snigger at because it's just not dressage. I'd slump around and look bored and my owner would be a bit red in the face. Then the bell would go and all bets are off and we'd wipe the floor with the competition ..... Because I hate to lose....:D
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I had a cob mare who fit this description perfectly haha
 
Love these :D:D

Something like a TB, definitely a mare. Poor doer, needs three quilts and rug if slightly drizzly, grey or under 14C. Lame just looking at hard ground. Spooky beyond belief, but athletic and intelligent.
 
I'd be an arab mare - not everyone's cup of tea, prone to worrying, rather flighty and flimsy looking, but quite tough apart from needing lots of rugs! Rather aloof at first, but loyal and willing if I trust you. Not a worldbeater, but will give anything ago. Unkindness will not be forgiven or forgotten though.
 
I'd be a small cob type mare standing suspiciously quietly at the very back of the dealer's yard, having come over from Ireland without a book as part of a job lot. Having been sold without a vetting as a 100% reliable first ridden to a novice family, I would spend the first ten to twelve days being the best pony ever. Then, just before their insurance cover could take effect, I would reveal my legion of incurable and expensive health issues. Mum and Dad would be put off horse ownership completely by this, but fortunately the children (let's call them Bonny and Tim) would tearfully refuse to part with me, so I would be retired to the field as a pet. Twenty or so years later, my original owner would randomly turn up, and reveal that he had sent me to the kennels after I ate his MIL's favourite straw hat. Tim would punch him in the face, and Bonny, now a police officer, would risk her career covering for her brother's rash decision. It would all work out okay in the end though, because Disney would buy the rights to it and make it into an animated film.

I may have overthought this...:D
 
Kaimar said:
I'd be a small cob type mare standing suspiciously quietly at the very back of the dealer's yard, having come over from Ireland without a book as part of a job lot. Having been sold without a vetting as a 100% reliable first ridden to a novice family, I would spend the first ten to twelve days being the best pony ever. Then, just before their insurance cover could take effect, I would reveal my legion of incurable and expensive health issues. Mum and Dad would be put off horse ownership completely by this, but fortunately the children (let's call them Bonny and Tim) would tearfully refuse to part with me, so I would be retired to the field as a pet. Twenty or so years later, my original owner would randomly turn up, and reveal that he had sent me to the kennels after I ate his MIL's favourite straw hat. Tim would punch him in the face, and Bonny, now a police officer, would risk her career covering for her brother's rash decision. It would all work out okay in the end though, because Disney would buy the rights to it and make it into an animated film.

I may have overthought this...:D
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Brilliant :D :D :D
 
Kaimar said:
I'd be a small cob type mare standing suspiciously quietly at the very back of the dealer's yard, having come over from Ireland without a book as part of a job lot. Having been sold without a vetting as a 100% reliable first ridden to a novice family, I would spend the first ten to twelve days being the best pony ever. Then, just before their insurance cover could take effect, I would reveal my legion of incurable and expensive health issues. Mum and Dad would be put off horse ownership completely by this, but fortunately the children (let's call them Bonny and Tim) would tearfully refuse to part with me, so I would be retired to the field as a pet. Twenty or so years later, my original owner would randomly turn up, and reveal that he had sent me to the kennels after I ate his MIL's favourite straw hat. Tim would punch him in the face, and Bonny, now a police officer, would risk her career covering for her brother's rash decision. It would all work out okay in the end though, because Disney would buy the rights to it and make it into an animated film.

I may have overthought this...:D
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This. Is. Amazing.

:D
 
I'd probably be a traditional cob (as I'm typing this I have literally just sat on my "mane"). I don't need feeding too much to keep me in "show condition". Would suit a happy hacking home due to my god-awful conformation and misspent youth causing chronic pain and stiffness, but I like to please and have a lot to offer a sensitive owner. Don't have much patience for children, so would be best as a small lady's mount. Also would probably crib or windsuck as I'm a compulsive skin picker/biter in real life!
 
I'd be a long legged tall thoroughbred. Not very food oriented and difficult to keep weight on. Very easily spooked and can throw in some unseating shapes. Will go all day.
 
I'd be an Arab mare. Can come across as stand offish when I don't know ppl. Once I trust you will do anything for you. Always over think things but don't always show it unless you take the time to observer and listen
 
I'd be Mrs Average. 15.2 middleweight bay (maybe ISH or Connie cross?) not much to look at but kind and reliable. I'd do anything for food and would be permanently on a diet. I'd be an unflappable, sensible sort who is anybody's ride (not like that, you filthy lot). I'd be lazy enough to be quiet for a novice but could step it up when made to by a decent rider. I would do what is asked of me without protest but wouldn't see the point in doing any more than was absolutely necessary. If something did bother me I'd shut down rather than having a bucking fit. I would occasionally get a little bit excited, maybe the odd bunny hop but it would last about 30 seconds before I saw sense and got on with the job. In fact a smaller, less pretty version of Monty. Not really thought about it but he and I are very similar!

Archie on the other hand is my OH. A big chunk, not classically handsome but has something about him. In his comfort zone (i.e. on the road - OH is a traffic cop!) he's the most reliable horse you could find. Anywhere else, he's the react first, think later, worry about things constantly type. Despite this, when the chips are down he's surprisingly good in a crisis and basically a good egg.

There has to be some sort of psychological phenomenon going on!
 
My OH reminds me of my Ardennes (I can safely say that on here because neither of them read H&H!).

Chunky build, with a stomach that looks like its growing babies, constantly ignoring diet advice. Will plod happily for hours, with an unexpected turn of speed when the occasion warrants - for about 50 metres anyway.

Lovely personality, bit of an internal worrier and definitely hen pecked by the women in their lives!!
 
I think I would be welsh section B!

I'm small and lean. Slight attitude problem but extremely loyal. I also like to run fast (we used to call my old girl 'The Ginger Blur' as she would always overtake all the big horses at speed while on a hack!).

Haven't quite perfected the 'haughty headtoss' but I'm working on it! ;)
 
Loving some of these replies. So funny. My OH would be a very food oriented Irish Draught. Very hard working and fit but always on the look out for his next food opportunity and therefore probably a four on the condition scale.
 
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