I'm feeling really guilty.

H

henryhorn

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23 October 2003
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Location
Devon UK
www.narramorehorses.blogspot.com
I wrote to all my retirement livery owners to tell them sadly their livery had to increase by £2 a week from August the 1st, this is because I am getting massive price hikes in the invoices from the contractors we use for fencing and haylage .
Most have just replied saying they understand but two have said they are planning to have their horses put down.
Now I do understand, one of them has been here 11 years, another around six, and they have paid out a load of money for them to have a happy retirement, though my charges are cheaper than anyone I know.. and I can see how paying the money for horses they see a couple of times a year is daft, but I can't stop feeling if I hadn't put the rent up they wouldn't have made that decision.
I feel as if I am to blame for the horses having to die. both have health issues, one is slightly lame, the other has a kissing spine, and so can't be offered to any charity etc or other homes.
I admire the owners for caring enough to give their horses a lovely life for years after they couldn't use them as I wouldn't have paid for all those years myself!
I can tell both owners are really embarrassed by their decisions but I have no gripe with the decision, just why they made it. (my fault)
We of course will have to arrange for the vet and cremation people and they just pay, but how do I get round this guilt feeling?
Before anyone suggests it, no I can't afford to just keep them here free.
 
HH, don't feel guilty. It sounds like those horses have had a lovely few years retirement on your land, and will go happy and pain free. The decision will have to be made at some point. I think it is far better for the horses to be pts now than to wait until they can't get up one morning.......
 
Don't feel guilty. It is the owners' decisions to make. Maybe the price increase was the catalyst, or maybe it has helped them reach their decision. After all £2 a week is only £104 a year.

These horses have clearly enjoyed their retirement and, due to various issues may not see many more years. Better now than later when they are in more pain and/or have gone downhill.

You are not to blame. x
 
Please don't feel guilty for such a small increase in rent. As has already been said, this is probably just a catalyst for theit decision. I think a small increase is very reasonable and the decision is the owners', not your's.
You need take NO blame at all.
 
Don't feel guilty. Like Arwen said, the slight (and it's very slight!) price increase may well just have been the slight push they needed to make a decision they've been deliberating on for a while. The actual money is so little, in the grand scheme of things, that it can't be the cause. It's only a couple of chocolate bars worth a week!

Many people do 'hold on' to their horses for too long, because letting go is so hard. I know a couple of elderly horses for whom being PTS would be a kinder option yet their owners aren't ready to face it yet. It sounds like your charges have has a wonder retirement, much more than many others get. Never feel guilty about letting them go with dignity and calm, before they suffer.
 
not your fault, and if £2 a week really is enough to make them change their minds... jeeez.
and how much do they think euthanasia and cremation are going to cost?! a fiver?!!
gggrrr. you shoudn't feel guilty.
 
Completely agree with Arwen - much better now when the horses are still ok. The minor, minor price increase is nothing and I'm sure they do understand why etc. These beasts have had a lovely retirement with you, and will go on a good day, not on a bad day when they are riddled with pain and suffering.

Please try not to feel guilty. Lots of hugs
 
HH, please dont feel guilty.
Its changing times FGS, everything has gone up.
The horses have had a very happy life with you, 11 years and 6 years of happy times is beter than being pts when the owner didnt have time for them anymore.
I do wonder if this is a just an over reaction on the owners part also! tug on those heart strings of yours.
Ive considered having Bertie pts this winter also, due to ever increasing bills... atm Im teaching as much as possible in hope i can keep him a little longer as hes so well in himself.
Im now moving yards on tuesday slightly further but with better facilities and a saving of near £100 a month!!! thats a lot of money.
I will do anything to keep my boys right now, and if it means moving then so be it.
 
Everything is going up at the moment so of course you need to pass on these increases. In no way should you feel guilty as £2 a week is such a nominal sum. Sounds to me as though maybe they think if they say they'll put the horse down you'll relent and not put up your price. Big hugs anyway.
 
I find this really odd because like Arwen said £2 a week is only £104 a year. PTS, collection and cremation will cost at least 5 times that amount which could pay for the next 5 years with you. Im not sure how old the horses are or how long realistically they have left but 5 years is a long time so they wouldnt be saving any money. Plus the extra money paid to you is spread out over the year and not one lump sum like PTS would be!
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Maybe they are trying to make you feel guilty so that you will change your mind over the price increase???
 
Don't feel bad, my YO agonised for ages about putting our livery up, we hadn't had an increase for years and she was almost making a loss!

Like her, you are not a charity and everything else has gone up so you need to put your prices up.

Those horses have had the best retirement they could have and you have done everything you can to ensure they were happy and well cared for.

X
 
Don't feel guilty, Henryhorn.
I actually don't think their decision is anything to do with your £2 price increase - I think it was more the fact of you contacting them, that prompted it.
As you have looked after them well during their retirement, then you have ensured their last years were happy - not every horse is as lucky.
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Thanks everyone, I think probably they must have been thinking about doing it anyway, and the increase just made their minds up.
The hard part now of which they don't see is seeing their horses every day until it's done, knowing their time is limited.
They have had a very happy retirement which lesser owners wouldn't have given them, so I can't blame then really.
Then of course it's doing the actual deed. Our vet is great and I have no worries on that score, but seeing two healthy aminals die is always very hard.
 
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