I'm Fuming.....My Disregarding neighbours

Bay_Beasty

Bay_Beasty

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On Saturday the Neighbours had their grandchildren over and took them to the camp in the woods at the bottom of my fields to play. There were a lot of screaming children and my new horse was petrified and Dougal was not impressed either. I managed to catch him eventually, while praying neither broke a leg while they flew around the field screaming. Both were plastered in sweat but calmed down after a while being in and then had a bath and something to eat and went back out.

My neighbours brought me back from Church yesterday and I mentioned that my new pony was very nervous and could they please let me know next time they are going to take the children down to the camp and I will bring the horses in.

So I go food shopping and come back to see both horses running up and down the fence and at the bottom of their field and in the sodding camp is a fire....yes a fire
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!!!! I go out and by the time I am out there yet again I have too very upset horses. My neighbours watched as I struggled to catch them and all they seemed to do was watch as Dougal flew round the field again in blind panic pointing him out to their grandchildren like he was doing it for fun. He very nearly broke his leg and one point. I yet again have two very upset neddies plastered in sweat. I have not yet rung them to again re iterate my point made yesterday in the car as I will probably scream at them. I am so cross.

I have found some rescue remedy I will be putting in both their feeds tonight before they go back out.
 
Now that is VERY inconsiderate. Ok, the first time they may not have realised that they could upset the horses. But to do it after you had specifically asked them to tell you is not on. Maybe write them a note?
 
If you don't own the woods I don't think there is very much you can do about it apart from ask them again to be more considerate.
 
After speaking to them yesterday you have absolutely every right to be fuming. Some people can be so ignorant - why oh why would they think it would be ok to start a camp fire the day after they upset the horses by just playing down there!?!?!?!
Beggars belief!!!
 
Even if it's a public area I don't think they can go around lighting fires....sounds like a really difficult situation though! I hope your neighbours come to understand how dangerous their behaviour is.
 
I dont see how they can be expected to inform you every time they wish to take their grandchildren out to play in what I assume are public grounds? (the woods)
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I know how frustrating it can be - last year, our landlords took to spraying/muckspreading the field next to Ellie's without telling us, and we'd often get back to find her lathered with sweat
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But if the land is not yours, or is public - you really dont have a leg to stand on. And lets face it, kids playing and calling to one another, and even a campfire being started, in a forest next to a paddock should not be considered a horsey hazard...it sounds like your horses just need to learn to settle. I dont mean to sound harsh, as I am the owner of a stresspot myself, but this year I'm forcing myself to be tough with her - there is no need for her to be brought in just because a tractor has started up/her friend has been brought in/another horse is being schooled/YO has lit a bonfire etc!
 
So....you want your neighbours to not have their grandchildren round? To not use their garden like loads of other people do? To ask your permission before they have any fun?
 
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I think you are completely over-reacting!

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So do I actually. If you're worried about people in the woods disturbing your horses (they will actually get used to it), then pop them in a different field.

Horses on my yard have an awful lot to put up with. Chain saws to fell trees, or general maintenance of the woods. People walking through the woods (sometimes with dogs). Scrambler bikes in the neighbours fields. Tractors. ATV.

Amazingly they cope very well
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You can't expect people to be silent around your stock
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I dont think OP is over-reacting. Nor saying her neighbours cant go out and play with their grandchildren. She politely asked to be informed so she could minimise the upset to her horses and her polite request was ignored. IMO that means the neighbours are inconsiderate. It wasnt an unreasonable request from the OP, just asking for a minutes consideration and communication. If you read the OP She wasnt expecting to be asked for her permission!
 
If you read OP - she went out!!! What are they supposed to do, sit inside knitting until she comes home?
 
I can see why you are really upset, but I can also see why your neighbours did not inform you. If its not your land they can do as they please as long as it is not damaging your land or property- i.e its not their fault your horses are afraid
However the situation changes if the kids are allowed to lite fire unattended in the woods- im sure there is something about that which would mean should the fire spread they (not the granchildren who are minors) would be liable for damage to your property- so maybe ask them to inform you about any fires in advance to make sure horses are well away from danger and inform them of the risk of damage etc- but as they are neighbours be friendly and polite.
 
Maybe they called round but if you had gone out what were they supposed to do? I think you are over reacting, how will your horses manage at shows and hacking etc if they're not allowed to get used to different noises.
 
Whilst I can understand you feeling aggrieved if neighbours had made no effort to warn you, I have to say I think you are over reacting. As poster above has said horses do need to get used to different noises, sights etc, particularly if you are intending competing. We also have a very stressy neurotic mare, who will hurtle round the field at the slightest provocation, but if we worried about her breaking a leg every time she did it we'd be nervous wrecks too (and actually she has fractured a leg, but that was not from galloping round). The same mare tries to stick her face in the fire when we have a bonfire next to the field
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Yes, horse do have to get used to different sights and sounds. However, OP was being sensible in that her new NERVOUS horse was PETRIFIED. They were both covered in sweat and in a blind panic. You get a horse used to new situations in a slow progressive way. You dont just submit the horse to a new experience to the extent it gets in a blind panic to teach it!
Maybe the neighbours did call round or maybe OP didnt explain enough what the problem was. Either way i dont think the OP is unreasonable in trying to protect her horses
 
Hmm, for those of you who think I am over reacting, I am not. I have only had Twiggy a week, she is an incredibly nervous horse who has been on her own for 6 months, minimal human contact and no horsey contact. She is clearly very frightened by loud noises and their camp is right next to my fields, but in their part of the woods. I would normally just let them get on with it, but clearly it is not fair too, so why should I risk my two horses breaking legs. My neighbours know when the children are coming round. All I asked was for a phone call, they could of left a message on the phone if no answer. My horse is normally fine with it, but clearly the fact that it stresses out Twiggy causes him to get stressed too.

I do not mind the children playing, in fact its great to see them having fun, it only happens on the weekends as this is when the grand children, so it is not like I am not around. I really don't see that I am over reacting, I think considering I had asked them yesterday it would be polite to tell me they are going down to the woods.
 
Fair enough, I do see your point of view more now. However, fi the grandchidlren come regularly she is going to have to get used to it, or spend a lot of time in. Perhaps you could ask the children to come round and meet Twiggy over the stable door, quietly, so she could realise they aren't the monsters she thinks they are . Another thought, I have a noise densitiser cd I use for puppies, something like that might help Twiggy. You start playing very quietly and gradually increase the noise. It has everything from children playing to helicopters, firework displays etc.
 
Oooo, M M that sounds like a really good idea. I bring both of them in for about 5 hours each day any way to deflate them and so that Twiggy comes in and has brushes and tickles and gets used to human contact. I will google it and buy her one so that when they are in they can listen too it. Dougal is usually fine with everything, never made a fuss last summer and I am sure Twiggy will be O.K. but I just wanted her to get used to the noise when she was in first, just until she is completely settled with her new home.
 
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Ok I can see your point, but our horses have to put up with alot, farmers spreading poo, him having a welcome home party for his son at their farm, with very loud band, bbq, etc etc. I have to say, itsjust something you have to suffer a bit until your horses learn to deal with it. I can understand you don't want them to damage themselves, but really if they are not on your land what can you do?? I have herad of kids in my village being given asbos for playing football on a quiet street (and no I am not joking!!) so you could always go down that route, but I think its really a little OTT.

Some things are just out of your control, we have had very low flying hot air balloons go over ours (something to do with the lay of the land I think?) and I can't tell you how much they run around and wind themselves up, but its not like I can tell the air balloon pilot off is it?!

ETA think M M idea is a good on too!!
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It funny you should say that coz a hot air balloon came over yesterday and a low flying helicopter that landed in one of my other neighbours fields, neither batted an eyelid. I am sorry I got worked up and angry about it, but it really scares me when Dougal races around like that and he was leaping and throwing his legs about too and nearly squashing Twiggy. Thanks for the link M M will let you know how I get on.
 
BB why cant you stable your horse when you think these situations may arise.

Sadly YOU have the biggest responsibility to your horse and while you are annoyed at them, the buck stops with you. If you think that they might break legs....bring them in.
 
Its difficult situation and I understand how you must feel and also I can see what other posters are saying about the fact it is public land etc etc and your horses will get used it. We have a reservoir next to our horses and people walk their dogs. My big chap will spend hours watching people walk there with his eyes on stalks as though they are monsters. Some days are worse than others and I would say it has taken 6 months for him to reall not be bothered but some days if he notices something different i.e. some kids on a bike he becomes a big snorting beast again. Half the time he does it to give himself a fright and some fun as I know he isnt really bthered now.

Anyway here is my advice for what it is worth - perhaps you could ask your neighbours children to not creep around in there and make themselves quite visible so they dont seem a threat. Ask them to come over to the fence perimeter so the horses can see that they are just people not monsters. And you could go in the woods every day, perhaps on the edge to start with and then delve deeper in making more and more noise to desensitize. Also its worth remembering that horses are flight animals so they are only do what nature tells them. Perhaps boots all round plus OR boots for weekends when the children are there would offer some protection.

Not worth getting in a fight with neighbours over it ... feuding neighbours isnt nice (although I understand a horse that is petrified isnt any nicer nor ones with injuries!)
 
Yes it is a difficult one that as I have had similar problems with my neighbours doing odd things without me knowing. We have had all night parties with music very loud, helicopters landing in the field next to my horses, lighted lantern things being set off in the night and landing in the field my horse is in (found the burnt remains the next day), bonfires lit that cascade burning cardboard all over the field and our property, dogs wandering into the field...the list goes on! It annoys the hell out of me as they are horse owners themselves but I do not worry so much now as if nothing else, it has helped bomb proof my horse to such things!! I don't think people 'get' horses behaviour and I dont think people should be expected to tell you everytime they do such things...people are selfish and thick at times and it does not occur to them to use some common sense.
 
Do you own the woods? No? Then basically, tough. It is up to them what they do in there and when. They probably are allowed to light fires, as long as they are careful, there should be no problem. I would never expect people to think of advising about taking their children/grandchildren into woods because somebody has a horse next door. Very sorry, but this is your problem, not theirs.
 
I'd be tearing my hair out too but this sounds like a thing you need to condition them to. Tempting though it may be to go round the neighbours guns blazing, maybe approach them and ask them to help you? Get the children to come into the field, with you there from out of the woods. Quietly to start with, make it a bit of a game for them, part of the problem is the horses can't properly see what is creating the racket and need to associate it with something, they will probably be fine. My one neighbour has pigs and they are tucked away in the woods two fields away, they make the most blood curdling noises but the neds never seem bothered. Likewise the other neighbour has driving ponies and often drives them around the fields when the ground is dry, neither horse is bothered in the slightest now.
 
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