I'm not being unreasonable am I ? Long sorry

H

hobgoblin

Well-Known Member
Joined
9 September 2011
Messages
326
Visit site
We put our daughters 24 yr old schoolmistress out on loan fairly locally 3 years ago as she wasn't really ready to just bum around here and thought she could help another child out before she came home to retire she had been out on loan before but came back when outgrown so has been away for a bit I'm quite easy going but did stipulate in the agreement that she needed 6 monthly dentistry due to poor mouth confirmation paid for by me carried out by my edt all fine although found out from Edt that they were not there for one appointment and cancelled the new one at the last minute has also been un reliable for farrier visits (by my husband) any way has proven to be very difficult to contact finally made contact and had a whole load of reasons for missing appointments kids mother in law been I'll etc etc said if your busy i can come and get her no probs anyway hubby went to do pony s feet and waked she was looking a bit old and thin another 2 weeks of trying to make contact to go and see her myself which I did on Wednesday she is indeed thin which I commented on to have my head snapped off with well we havnt got any grass! Now I'm not saying the pony s been mistreated in any way but I would definitely want much more weight on her at this time of year than she does it would be entirely different if it was for instance march. I was met with Quite alot of rudeness any way to cut along story short I want her back so phoned to say as much but that I'd have her back for the winter to try and get a bit mOre condition on her and review returning her in the spring if she's up to it if not just keep her here to enjoy her retirement and babysit well I've never come across anybody so rude she said no if I try to put weight on her she will just get a fat tummy point taken and her children are too attached to her at this point very cross and shaking by now I informed that Iwasn't asking for her back but informIng that she is comng home I've agreed to pick her uP after 1/2 term but now worried in the interim I don't think I'm being unreasonable am I ? Any thoughts gratefuly recieved hoPe this reads ok as posted on my Phone sloe gin if you got this far
 
:confused: That isn't easy reading with no full stops or paragraphs BUT think I got the point!! Lol!!

No you are not unreasonable...your horse so your choice and TBH after hearing they hadn't had the EDT out I'd have been straight over and got her back. Any horse I'd insist on having them checked but a 24 year old with pre-existing issues???? Nope home and left to enjoy a safe fat retirement.
 
TBH if you are uncomfortable with the way things are (which I would be) then get her back asap if you can. I would worry that she might go "missing" or that if they know she is coming back they will neglect her more. She is still your pony and you are entitled to have her back be it reasonable or unreasonable - that is why it is a loan. It does not sound like an ideal home and you know it is not going to improve. How much notice do you have to give?
 
No you're not being unreasonable. I had a similar situation, my native pony mare out of loan, again reasonably locally. I went over to visit in March this year, to find a thin, scruffy rather sorry looking pony. I have had her for 13 years, and she has been on an almost constant diet for most of that time, good doer is not the word. I was most concerned that they had not mentioned that she had lost such a lot of weight - she had developed withers for gods sake! And they were still using the very wide, almost flat saddle on her. She also had a number of bald patches.

I decided that she really needed to come home asap. She was infected with lice, ribs, withers, shoulders all clearly visible. Coat was awful, long and thin. She was withdrawn and lacking personality - not like her at all.

She is now a picture of health and on a diet again.

I woudl just go and get her if I were you.
 
No youre not being unreasonable, if it was my horse id be rolling up in the lorry and removing her, they have renaged on their end of the loan agreement re the dentistry and feet which in an aged horse, indeed any horse are very important. I would be worried sick if it was my wee old bird
 
misst said:
TBH if you are uncomfortable with the way things are (which I would be) then get her back asap if you can. I would worry that she might go "missing" or that if they know she is coming back they will neglect her more. She is still your pony and you are entitled to have her back be it reasonable or unreasonable - that is why it is a loan. It does not sound like an ideal home and you know it is not going to improve. How much notice do you have to give?
Click to expand...

^^^This

At the end of it all she is YOUR pony not theirs. Yes, the kids may well be attached to her but if they are not looking after her properly then the family do not deserve to have her. The kids will get over it.
 
Yes it's strange that she's thin we've had her for 12 years and always been restricted food wise i would have expected to be let know that she was lOosing condition I know oldies do but she's not that old
Misst they have to give me a months notice but I can take her back at anytime as written out in the loan aggrement just was trying to be nice they do have another pony so it's not like they ll be ponyless
 
I would get her asap if i was you , we all know older horses need extra TLC which these folks obviously can't do , your old pony deserves to be retired with dignity for all the good work she's done for your kids as well as others , you're lucky she was just out on loan and you have the choice to get her back.
 
If you do not have to give any notice then just go and get her. The kids happiness is their parents responsiblity - which they have renaged on. The ponys well being is yours:)
 
Just go and get her. Your loyalty is to her, not them. When i have had ponies out on loan, the contract always stated one month's notice on the loaner's side, none on mine. Practically, if I ever was given notice, I collected asap. A lot can happen in a month to a pony that is not wanted.
 
I would collect her asap if I were you. If the lady was rude to you you cannot be sure what will happen. I would say that the children are welcome to come and see her over half term.

Has she had the EDT to see her? I just wonder if she has missed her appointment like you said she may be having trouble eating - therefore causing the weight loss.
 
marydoll said:
No youre not being unreasonable, if it was my horse id be rolling up in the lorry and removing her, they have renaged on their end of the loan agreement re the dentistry and feet which in an aged horse, indeed any horse are very important. I would be worried sick if it was my wee old bird
Click to expand...

^^ I agree ^^

quick smart, the woman has been rude, obnoxious and has at one point argued that she didn't want the horse to come back to you. Your priority is to the horse, and your conscience. I would get little neddy back asap for some pampering, and if you are serious about considering letting them have her back next year, then invite them to arrange with you to come and visit her.
 
Go and get her because the next excuse will be that its snowing so you can't (we are forecasted show in about 2-3 weeks in Cumbria).

Personally I would want her back ASAP to get weight on before the weather sets in for another hard winter. Every day counts now.
They have breached the terms of their contract with you and done wrong by your pony.
 
I'd turn up with a trailer/box and collect her now. I'd take someone with you for a witness and to help. Make sure everything that belongs to you and that horse is collected on that one visit so no need to go back.

Please let us know how you get on. I love a happy ending
 
No you are defo not being unreasonable. Cheeky cow. Not having enough grass is a ridiculous reason for a thin horse. Go sooner as with the oldies puttig weight on this time of year can be nigh on impossible. Grass flushing atm. Time to go
 
Damnation said:
Personally I would want her back ASAP to get weight on before the weather sets in for another hard winter. Every day counts now.
They have breached the terms of their contract with you and done wrong by your pony.
Click to expand...

This precisely.
I would also be worried regarding further neglect if they keep her or run her ragged as they won't care. :(
 
Thanks everyone I'm worried sick since I phoned I should have just said I'm going to get her at the weekend they have all her 'stuff' so hope I get that back it's all listed but to be honest I just want the pony where I can keep an eye on her , if she has started to go downhill then that's another matter that I can address myself I didn't sell her purely for the reason she was such a good pony for us and I wanted to make sure she spent her last years happy and content with a full belly hubby's away at mo but will take the advice of taking someone with me will keep you posted
 
Yes - i agree.
Go and get her back ASAP! I am alarmed that the lady was actually rude to you, after all you are the horses owner and have kindly given her to her on loan - i think it is very bad manners to talk to you in that way especially as I it obvious that the horse is starting to look poor.
Best get her back and pamper her over the winter :) she'll be glad to be back I should think.
 
as others have said, don't delay just get her back. you can then start her rehab and getting weight on her before the really bad weather comes. good luck!!
 
Hi,

As everyone has said you are not being unreasonable but she IS!
and using the kids as a guilt trip. Sod the kids, get the pony back Now if possible, if not - pitch up at theirs tomorrow nice and early say 8am and bring her home. If they dont give you all her belongings they have until the end of saturday 5pm to return them, otherwise you will seek legal advice.

DONT PULL ANY PUNCHES!
 
Good grief, what a lot of excuses! When we had a serious grass shortage this summer, I was out buying bales of Readigrass and feeding haylage to keep my lot in good condition. Go and get your mare!
 
misst said:
TBH if you are uncomfortable with the way things are (which I would be) then get her back asap if you can. I would worry that she might go "missing" or that if they know she is coming back they will neglect her more. She is still your pony and you are entitled to have her back be it reasonable or unreasonable - that is why it is a loan. It does not sound like an ideal home and you know it is not going to improve. How much notice do you have to give?
Click to expand...

Agree with the above and I would get her back sooner rather than later!
 
Pick her up now. Don't leave her there any longer, especially if she is thin now.

Remember she needs you and you having to worry is terribly stressful!!
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top