I'm on the outside looking in

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BlackDiamond

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I have a group of great friends who all ride, there's 7 of us and although we met separately, we all get along great.

We have recently got our own yard, justf the seven of us and its lovely, apart from one thing. I feel terribly left out. We have three 2 horse lorries between us, so obviously that leaves one person unable to buddy up and go anywhere with anyone - and guess what? Thats me.

Tonight I was mucking out my stable, whilst listenning my friends plan their various outings over the next few weeks - XC, dressage comps local shows, who'd go in whose lorry. Without a mention of me. Ok I know they can take who they like but it would be courteous if they would at least not discuss it in my earshot so I wouldnt feel so bloody left out.

Not much anyone can say to this, Im starting saving for my own transport, but I guess it just goes to show you can't make people like you
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Blackdiamond
 
Oh that sounds rough - is the yard rented between you all? Depending on your circumstances it might be worth considering moving somewhere else - particularly if you don't fit in. I had the same thing on two yards which were both small - sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. Don't beat yourself up over it though - it'll work itself out
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I think you should know....your post title comes up as
'Im on the outside loo'
I'm evil, and unsympathetic...but it made me snigger.
Let down their tyres.
S <img src="http://www.horseandhound.co.uk/forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

[/ QUOTE ]

lmao now that has made me smile.
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Thanks Shils
 
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Three x 2 horse lorries - sorry Im not very clear.

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So who owns the lorries???

I'm assuming that they own the lorries, thus are pairing up with whoever they or their horse gets on best with.
 
i think whenever theres an odd number in a group, someone will always get left out, human nature to 'pair up' with someone i guess, trouble is now it's happened it's not so easy to undo it and get included
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They probably don't even realise they're doing it or how you feel about it, might be worth trying to talk to one of them about it.
 
Awww really feel for you hun. Can't really advise anything thats not already been said but I hope you work it out one way or another.x
 
Oh thats not nice is it?? I remember feeling like that, i used to get a big lump in my throat and feel so left out and i just wanted to cry!! how sad is that??
 
Don't be a victim!
When these discussions are going on why not get involved and let them know that you would really love to go somewhere too. They probably think you are not bothered - or offer to help and go along and give them a hand - that way it will be your turn next time.
 
I know it's an awful situation to be in but if you don't say anything nothing will change and nothing will be achieved by just feeling sorry for yourself (not meaning to be harsh here!)

Why not mention that you'd like to get out and about too and would they be willing to give you a space say once a month? If they are decent people they should be willing to do that!

Hope you get something sorted - I hate not having transport for my boy!
 
It's such a rubbish situation isn't it? There's a show on Saturday that I would love to take my lad to. In past years we asked the farmer because not many people had transport. Now just enough people have it for them to pair up, except I have no-one to pair up with. It's their transport so obviously they can do what they want with it. It's just like you, when I hear them talking through their plans and what they want to do and where they are going, I just wish I could do it all with mine.
Sorry lol, turned into a bit of a ramble, but you're not alone in feeling like that!
 
you're halfway there to sorting it with your own transport, hang in there with the thought this won't last forever, the cynical side of me wonders how many without transport will suddenly be your best buddy when you do tho...it's a bit off to discuss it knowing you're there, have they ever offered to take you?
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You can look forward to that point when you have your transport that you don't have to share though, so hang onto that, you may find with your own you won't want to share it, with all the reg's these days and insurance am surprised people still share their transport now *rollseyes* lol
 
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