I'm starting to lose hope ]:

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I thought i had found the perfect loan horses in Jake and Shandy.
Oh how wrong it turned out to be!
I had only had them on loan for just over a week and me and the owner decided to jump a tiny cross pole.
Jake decided to jump 3 strides early and unseated me eventually with me ending up on the ground!
Normally i would just carry on with the loan horse and not think too much of it.
But ever since i had a terrible fall off a 17.2 which resulted in me having a ambulance take me to hospital i thought i don't know if this is going to work with the 2 horses.
I emailed the owner stating my concerns and they wern't too nice when they replied.
They said when they first met me i was nothing like i described my riding was like in my advert. I said i am a confident rider. I'm usually confident once i've got to know they horse, but they didn't look at me like that, they thought i had no clue. They also said it was my fault i fell off and that the horse could not hurt a fly, well here i am with pulled muscles in both arms. Back to losing hope, i have looked for months for a loan horse, i am desperate to have a horse that can sort of be mine. Please read this and reply with your views also if you know if anyone has a horse i can loan in Swindon or surronding areas.
I hope i find one soon or i feel my all my confidence will fly out the window ):
 

hadfos

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Is the jump the only issue you have with the horse???
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Weezy

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You really have to be brutally honest with yourself and your ability when describing your ability. If you DO have confidence issues then you must be honest about it, no owner will be angry that you have to work your way to full confidence, honesty is always the best policy!

Maybe a few lessons to work your confidence back up to where it was is the best way forward for now?
 
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Not just the jump, i didn't feel too confident on it, also it was not the sort of loan i expected, i was hoping to ride on my own to get some confidence but the owner had to ride with me every time and it just made me feel so nervous.
 

hadfos

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Just sounds to me that you dont know the horse sooo well after a week(which you wont)??and to expect you to jump an unknown quantity in the space of a week after the accident you had is a bit much
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...sounds to me like you need to hack and flatwork this horse before you build up to the next step
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...give him a chance,he jumped it for you
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hadfos

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[ QUOTE ]
Not just the jump, i didn't feel too confident on it, also it was not the sort of loan i expected, i was hoping to ride on my own to get some confidence but the owner had to ride with me every time and it just made me feel so nervous.

[/ QUOTE ]
hmmmm,not surprised you were nervous....if it isnt what you want and you feel this way now(dont let owner push you into anything),and you are convinced it will not work...then look for another....i would expect an owner to want to watch and see you ride their horse,but repeating myself...shouldnt push you beyond your boundaries,but you need to speak up
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AmyMay

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[ QUOTE ]
Not just the jump, i didn't feel too confident on it, also it was not the sort of loan i expected, i was hoping to ride on my own to get some confidence but the owner had to ride with me every time and it just made me feel so nervous.

[/ QUOTE ]

You sound lacking in experience, and not a confident rider (sorry). So it's very sensible that the owner was riding out with you - it would seem that they were not confident in your ability. Although of course, she may well just be ensuring that the two of you were a happy pair (you and the horse) before letting you loose on your own?? Which of course is perfectly reasonable.

I think it's very easy to overestimate our abilities - and I'm happy to admit I've done it myself. Last year was quite an eye opener for me when I bought my new horse. I wasn't quite the compentent, get on anything little rider I thought I was.

Apart from anything else though - horses in our lives does mean that we open ourselves up to danger. Whether we have a tumble when riding, or something silly like getting our foot stood on. And if someone can't accept the odd knock, then horses are perhaps not their hobby......
 

LauraBR

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I agree with the points Amymay has made.

Perhaps a series of lunge lessons at a riding school would help strengthen your seat and make you feel more secure in the saddle if your next horse does end up surprising you again? Horses will be horses and even the quietest ones can do something unexpected.
 

Archangel

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I echo what everyone else has said but if you are that bad (as the owner has said) why are they letting you ride the horse?

Why are they loaning the horse?

Sometimes people get other riders to do things they are too s*** scared to do and then blame them when it goes wrong. Perhaps next time (when you are not in an ambulance) you could ask her to get on and show you how its done.

The best horses will stretch your riding and you will learn a lot from them, but be careful not to overface yourself. Perhaps she would let you have lessons on the horse?

Best of luck.
 

Leah3horses

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Sorry to hear about this Nicola.I echo the other points above,and without knowing both sides and the horse in question personally it's difficult to comment.I can offer some general comments though...

As the owner of 2 horses who is also looking for a sharer, I can see why the owner would want you, or anybody else, to ride out in her company.The owner has hopefully spent a lot of time,love, money and energy on her horses and to allow a new person to ride them when they don't have the same level of investment (and I'm not talking about money here)or commitment (as committed as some loaners/sharers can be, it's not the same as having your own horse.I've been on both sides) takes a lot of trust on her part.That trust has to be built up over a much longer period of time than a week. I'm sorry but I wouldn't allow anybody to take either of my horses out alone until I knew them and trusted their level of riding and handling over several months, at least 3 months,probably nearer 6.It would take my horses,and most others,this long to form some sort of bond with a new person.

Those that have to loan or share have to respect the owners' wishes, balance what is best for the horse, what the owner offers and lastly what you can get out of it.Any responsible owner would rather you took it slow, got to know the horses and form a bond with them,with lots of groundwork,grooming etc in the first week before you even got on board in my opinion.Makes it fair to both the horse and new person then.This might seem over cautious but I want to find the right person,who will grow to love my horses and be a big part of their lives for a long time,who I can trust with their sole care eventually and who loves being with and riding my horses.I don't want a series of 'joyriders' who are only interested in getting on my horse and going out on their own.I'd want everybody to enjoy the share, especially the horses.


.A loan horse or share is not really 'sort of yours', it's somebody elses horse they have allowed you to ride and look after. Sounds like you were a sharer of these horses, not a loaner? Some horse owners who loan or share horses out can have the wrong motives, but thorough questioning of them should tell you this at the beginning,after all, it's your safety at the end of the day and you have to get to know the horse in a low key way.

It takes much more than a week to build any sort of bond with any horse, loan/bought or otherwise,it takes months.Don't allow yourself to do anything with any horse if you are in the slightest bit worried.Make handling and riding horses as safe as you possibly can.Learn from your falls and be more aware in future,you will be a good confident rider if you put the hard work in now at a riding school.

I agree, maybe riding school horses would be enough for you for now, they are the best way to get your confidence back up, most of us have had to do this at some point or another.
 

My_Eeyore

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[ QUOTE ]
it was not the sort of loan i expected, i was hoping to ride on my own to get some confidence but the owner had to ride with me every time and it just made me feel so nervous.

[/ QUOTE ]


Nikki this is getting more than a little tiresome now. The WHOLE point of you riding our horses was to keep Kiah company and have some fun as horsey girls together. This was NEVER going to be a traditional type loan as you knew.

I also take exception to comments you are making. We were offering you an opportunity to get as involved as you wanted with our yard, riding different horses and even competing all fo free! Kiah would have been willing to teach you dressage too if you had wanted. The email you were supposed to have sent is a fantasy, the first i heard was when i saw the advert on new rider saying you hadn't ridden for month
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I think you have more than adequately demonstrated that you are not suitable to loan a horse.

To reply to other questions raised in this thread please see

http://www.horseandhound.co.uk/forums/showflat.php?Number=3411412
 
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