Inexperienced family member bringing weanling to stables HELP!

[DataLore]

Alright so I'm beyond fuming with a ridiculously stupid family member who's about to do something that defies all logic. Here's a quick rundown of events, and I'm sure that after a quick glance over most of the people here will see my dilemma.

1. Two days ago I get wind from my mother that her sister (my aunt), is looking at getting a foal. I admittedly laugh it off, because said aunt has zero horse knowledge or experience and I couldn't imagine this would ever go through.

2. Yesterday said aunt turns up at my stables under the guise of wanting me to let her daughter ride my horse.. something I never have a problem with for my young cousins as said horse is an angel. Only later do I find out that whilst there, my aunt cornered the yard owner and somehow managed to get him to agree to take the foal! I am frankly speechless about this as it is, seeing as the yard is absolutely not safe for youngsters, and the yard owner had just watched me showing little cousin how to hold the reins.. so obviously novice.

3. For some reason that I cannot fathom, nobody seems to realise what a train wreck is about to unfold. I have a strong feeling that the aunt is expecting me to do everything with the foal and this was her plan the whole time. I have no desire to take on a foal right now.. or probably ever if I'm honest, because even though I consider myself to be quite experienced in horse ownership right now I do still realise that the keeping of young stock is a whole different ball game. Nothing I've said to my aunt has even gotten through it seems, even when I pointed out that the fencing on my yard wouldn't hold anything smaller than 13.2 inside for more than five mins. I did also try to gently point out that novice horse owners and green horses don't mix, but I may as well have been talking to a brick wall apparently.

4. When I expressed all of these concerns to my family, their reply was that it wasn't my problem and I should just let her get on with it. Well it will be my problem when I hear the clippity clippety of tiny hooves down the lane when it's escaped, or when it's screaming the stable walls down for it's mum and the yard owner inevitably gets fed up, but most of all, and this is what I need help with.. when the poor foal inevitably finds itself at deaths door because it's ended up at a home which is less than clueless.

So this is the dilemma.. aside from the fact that the whole scenario beggars belief.. I need to know what to do to help a weanling find it's feet if it does indeed turn out that it's receiving inadequate care.. and believe me it will. Any advice anyone can offer on the proper care of weanlings will be absolutely one hundred percent appreciated. The only good part of this thing is that she is getting a vet to come and geld the thing, and also get a passport and microchip done, but I doubt she'll even be able to follow vets advice on aftercare because I strongly suspect she'll be too scared to go in a stable with it when it's running round in circles.

I especially need to know what to feed the damn thing if she gives up on it and dumps it on me, (also another probable ending here) as I haven't the first clue about feeding youngstock. Sorry that this post sounds bitter and angry by the way but this whole scenario has gotten me so wound up.. didn't sleep a wink last night for worry about what's going to happen. The yard owner is a fair man but I do wonder if he'll be so amiable when it's my family member causing him no end of grief too, and I don't want to be kicked off my little slice of heaven over this. All I want is to get on with life but trouble does seem to love finding me.

Also what little I know of the foal is that it's still on it's mum, is six months old, a colt, and from the gypsies.. which could mean anything I know, as some are very well cared for, but seeing as it's being given away for free I doubt it's coming from a reputable source.

Please help, I'm really at my wits end and don't know what to do.

 

[paddi22]

Sounds amazingly frustrating.

But i'd have absolutely nothing to do with it as you are enabling the situation. If they have any questions they should go to YO. If they aren't looking after it then yard owner should be the one to follow up on it.

It sounds like the worst idea in the world.

If they were to even mention it to me i'd say 'sorry i have my hands full with my own horse, but YO will be more than happy to help'.

If you start doing even a TINY bit you will end up doing more and more.

They know they have a safety net with you and that they probably will try and dump it on you, but don't tlet them. Youngsters cost work and money for years and it's not your responsibility. If you even do a tiny bit or show any interest it will be enabling them to continue a bad situation.

 

[The Fuzzy Furry]

Make sure you get all the details of breeder, so if/when its dumped on you, you can call & try to persuade them to take it back......

 

[Magnetic Sparrow]

Regarding advice on how to feed and how to ease the weaning process, can I suggest you try posting in the breeding section? There are a lot of knowledgeable people in there.

And good luck.

 

[DGIN]

Hiya, I bred my own foal 2 years ago. I had been around horses most of my life but had no experience of looking after my own foal but with help and advice I've got a cracking 2 year old now. Basically I weaned my foal at 6 months old (January 2014), the foal stayed in the field with her two gelding friends and I took mum away, the foal just lived off grass and hay, she had wintered out and did well all winter off just that. I brought her back home as a 1 year old after living out 24/7 from being born and stabled her at night so that I could handle her (pick feet up etc..) I then started feeding her just horse and pony nuts, only a handful as she was a fairly good dooer.

Good luck and its a great experience watching a foal grow up and I hope your aunt does her homework...

 

[Spreebok]

Is it possible to speak to the YO and explain that although you're related, you will be having nothing to do with your aunt and her foal? Just thinking it may save you from a bad situation down the line if it/when goes tits up and YO tried to turn to you?

 

[DataLore]

Thank you all for the quick response, and sorry I haven't answered individually as I've just had a row with my mother because basically I'm falling to bits and she doesn't see a damn thing wrong with someone who doesn't even know how to put a headcollar on getting a foal. I'd have thought that having seen me go through the whole volunteering at stables, then college, then work placements then more volunteering and finally sharing/helping others out before buying my own horses and STILL having a learning curve after would have shown her how much experience is needed.. and I didn't buy a damn foal that's for sure!

To Paddi.. totally agreed on all counts, and I've already said I wash my hands of the whole thing, but I'm not sure I could stand idly by and watch either my little cousin get hurt by a bolshy youngster, or neglect of said youngster without doing something. I'm certainly not planning on offering free help, but if things degenerate past a certain point I know I'll have to do something. As for the yard owner.. he's a lovely guy, but he takes practically no interest in the goings on of the yard provided it doesn't interfere with his own horses or cause him a complete headache. I doubt he'd be very keen to take on any kind of responsibility so long as she keeps paying rent.

And to 'The Fuzzy Furry' (great name btw!) I will try to do so, but I strongly suspect the breeder doesn't give a damn about these babies if they're willing to give them away to free to complete novices. Sadly around my area I know of two herds of gypsy cobs which are bred to feed the animals at west midlands safari park and twycross.. wouldn't be surprised if these foals were coming from one of those herds. I will try though definitely.. last thing I need is a youngster right now.

Thank you Magnetic Sparrow that is definitely going to be my next port of call. I probably should have posted this in that section in the first place actually.

DGIN thank you very much for the advice! It gives me hope that if I do get lumped with the foal then at least I may have the means to feed it properly. I didn't know if there was any specific type of feed you should give to young stock at different stages of development, but if they can live on grass and hay and go on to pretty standard fare then it isn't so bad. Aunt definitely isn't doing any homework though which is most of my worry. She could at the very least be educating herself, but nope, they have one book on horse care at their home and she's convinced that's plenty to be going on.

And Spreebok.. I plan on doing just that. Just hoping he remembers it when he's being kept awake all night by a screaming bab.

 

[twiggy2]

I would speak to the yard owner just to say 'the foal is not anything to do with me' and to check that your aunt has not mentioned you as someone who will support her with the foal, your post sounds very bitter and maybe YO just said yes rather than being cornered?
If things get as bad as you are imagining the just call World Horse Welfare-you will do the foal no favours by helping out and enabling them to keep it for longer than they other wise would.

 

[SpringArising]

I wouldn't even be investing this much time and effort into it if I were you.

I would have nothing to do with it. Her choice, her problem. The only thing I'd do is compose my thoughts and send her a long email about your thoughts on this as an experienced owner and hopefully try to get her to change her mind. List all the costs involved, how she'll need to be very tough with it from the get go so it doesn't become unmanageable etc. then tell her that you'd love to help her find something more suitable. Foals are a complete PITA to manage and I would never willingly have one.

 

[Shay]

I'm only echoing what others have said - but you need to have nothing at all to do with this. If the foal is mistreated call World Horse Welfare or the BHS welfare line. (RSPCA are not terribly helpful...) Personally I would send an email simply because it invites further contact and you want none - but I would speak to your YO and let him know that you can have nothing to do with the foal. You don't know what she might have said to him about care arrangements so you do owe it to him that he is in the picture.

Then as best you can - and I know this is difficult with family - turn your back, close your ears and ignore everything.

 

[little_critter]

Is it worth mentioning to your aunt "you do realise you wont be able to ride it for 4 years don't you?"
That might put her off a bit.

 

[mynutmeg]

on a purely practical note, yes there are youngstock specific feeds but you're much better with a stud/youngstock balancer as too much starchs can cause a lot of joint problems (OCD) so the stud mixes aren't always a good plan as they are very strach/cereal heavy

 

[Goldenstar]

Don't suppose you can move your horse somewhere else ?

 

[DataLore]

I'm sorry for the long delay in responding yet again, but thankfully this time it was because I was busy getting things moving in the right direction. Had a long chat with the aunt over the cons of having a foal, which did include the what I thought was pretty obvious 'you back them at three at the very earliest so you'll have an expensive pasture ornament for years'.. the most shocking part of which being that she did not in fact know even this much. I don't know whether she was actually planning on sticking a saddle on a foal and trying to ride it, but I wouldn't put it past her with the current level of sheer ignorance being displayed. The only thing which gave her pause seemed to be the fencing issue. She had to walk past all the turnout fields the other day when I let her daughter ride my pony, and even she seemed to realise a foal would have no trouble ducking underneath and taking itself for a joy ride around the lanes. It's not much, but it's a start, a seed of doubt that can be worked on.

On a more positive note I've spoken with the yard owner, who was absolutely one hundred percent on board with everything and is being fairer than fair. As far as he's concerned I've got nothing to do with the foal and any consequent nightmares my aunt may cause for him. We were both shaking our heads over how bonkers the whole thing is, but he's said that if she brings it to the yard and either the foal or her cause trouble, then he'll ask them to leave, and he knows now that I never recommended the stables etc so my involvement is zero.

I'm still a little worried about what may happen if she does still bring it to my yard then has trouble selling on, but at least most of the weight is off my shoulders right now. Thanks to the advice both here and from other sources I feel like I could help the foal if things got really dire, and now I know I won't be chucked off my yard by mere association with a problem. My yard may not be much to look at on the outside, but it suits me down to the ground and the handful of people who livery there are lovely. Moving really wasn't an option.

Thank you all for the support and advice though. I was running around like a headless chicken before, and I needed some good rational people to bring me back to earth! If this foal does come to my yard I'll post an update, but I do hope it won't come to that now. You're all great okay? :3

 

[Dry Rot]

Just another endorsing all that has been said. But you can't live other people's lives for them and sometimes they will surprise you. I took on a weaned Anglo-Arab foal many years ago with virtually no previous experience of horses though I do have a farming background and am experienced with stock. I lived at the back of some forestry in the remote Scottish Highlands with no local help, no Internet (back then!), and just had to work things out for myself. It wasn't a disaster. I treated him like a dog, took him for walks, and probably over de-sensitised him as he was definitely a pet. He was sold at three, walked straight into the trailer (which he had never seen before in his life, let alone travelled), and I had people phoning up for weeks asking if I had any more like him. The buyer said he'd lunged him for twenty minutes when he'd got him home but he'd behaved so well, he'd just got on and ridden him off!

Sometimes the best way to learn is by making mistakes. So long as no long term harm comes to the foal, why not let your aunt make the mistakes? Horses don't break easily and there will be plenty around your aunt to see she doesn't go too far wrong. And it will probably be quite funny watching her deal with the inevitable nipping and kicking and the tactics of a spoilt youngster she won't have the experience to correct. She will probably learn humility from the experience, at least. So step back and watch without getting involved. Next time, she'll listen to you!

 

[touchstone]

I'd helpfully write a very long list of the things needed, including all care and costs involved, and at the end put a caveat that you are so busy with your own that you won't be able to help, but advice can be sought from a professional at £x amount an hour.

It might just bring home the time, commitment and cost of owning. Put in everything from daily routines of twice daily visits, dental checks, back checks, farriery. worming, vaccinations, mucking out, feeding/watering, breaking/schooling costs etc etc. Also the fact that it will probably be better with the company of other youngsters to learn social skills and be able to play.

If she still goes ahead then I'd completely distance myself from her and involve welfare agencies if needed. As soon as you start doing anything with the foal I fear you will be left with the responsibility while she will wander up occasionally with her daughter for a pet.

 

[PuzzlePiece]

Alright so I'm beyond fuming with a ridiculously stupid family member who's about to do something that defies all logic. Here's a quick rundown of events, and I'm sure that after a quick glance over most of the people here will see my dilemma.

1. Two days ago I get wind from my mother that her sister (my aunt), is looking at getting a foal. I admittedly laugh it off, because said aunt has zero horse knowledge or experience and I couldn't imagine this would ever go through.

2. Yesterday said aunt turns up at my stables under the guise of wanting me to let her daughter ride my horse.. something I never have a problem with for my young cousins as said horse is an angel. Only later do I find out that whilst there, my aunt cornered the yard owner and somehow managed to get him to agree to take the foal! I am frankly speechless about this as it is, seeing as the yard is absolutely not safe for youngsters, and the yard owner had just watched me showing little cousin how to hold the reins.. so obviously novice.

3. For some reason that I cannot fathom, nobody seems to realise what a train wreck is about to unfold. I have a strong feeling that the aunt is expecting me to do everything with the foal and this was her plan the whole time. I have no desire to take on a foal right now.. or probably ever if I'm honest, because even though I consider myself to be quite experienced in horse ownership right now I do still realise that the keeping of young stock is a whole different ball game. Nothing I've said to my aunt has even gotten through it seems, even when I pointed out that the fencing on my yard wouldn't hold anything smaller than 13.2 inside for more than five mins. I did also try to gently point out that novice horse owners and green horses don't mix, but I may as well have been talking to a brick wall apparently.

4. When I expressed all of these concerns to my family, their reply was that it wasn't my problem and I should just let her get on with it. Well it will be my problem when I hear the clippity clippety of tiny hooves down the lane when it's escaped, or when it's screaming the stable walls down for it's mum and the yard owner inevitably gets fed up, but most of all, and this is what I need help with.. when the poor foal inevitably finds itself at deaths door because it's ended up at a home which is less than clueless.

So this is the dilemma.. aside from the fact that the whole scenario beggars belief.. I need to know what to do to help a weanling find it's feet if it does indeed turn out that it's receiving inadequate care.. and believe me it will. Any advice anyone can offer on the proper care of weanlings will be absolutely one hundred percent appreciated. The only good part of this thing is that she is getting a vet to come and geld the thing, and also get a passport and microchip done, but I doubt she'll even be able to follow vets advice on aftercare because I strongly suspect she'll be too scared to go in a stable with it when it's running round in circles.

I especially need to know what to feed the damn thing if she gives up on it and dumps it on me, (also another probable ending here) as I haven't the first clue about feeding youngstock. Sorry that this post sounds bitter and angry by the way but this whole scenario has gotten me so wound up.. didn't sleep a wink last night for worry about what's going to happen. The yard owner is a fair man but I do wonder if he'll be so amiable when it's my family member causing him no end of grief too, and I don't want to be kicked off my little slice of heaven over this. All I want is to get on with life but trouble does seem to love finding me.

Also what little I know of the foal is that it's still on it's mum, is six months old, a colt, and from the gypsies.. which could mean anything I know, as some are very well cared for, but seeing as it's being given away for free I doubt it's coming from a reputable source.

Please help, I'm really at my wits end and don't know what to do.

Apologies I haven't read through all posts but I can offer weanling advice.
- get passport before it leaves the mare, otherwise you may need to Dna test etc and it's easier in thee long run
- as far as I'm aware unless the foal is still on the dam you will need a passport to travel it legally
- feed wise Id advise a youngstock balancer ie suregrow or you can feed creep feed initially. But ring feed companies for specific advice. I've found baileys and topspec good in the past.
- youngsters need to live with other horses their age in order to learn social skills and play. In my opinion I wouldn't want a weanling on its own or just with older horses. It can work but it's not ideal.
- find out if the foal us being weaned prior to arrival or being put straight in a traier and brought to the yard - the latter can be dangerous and stressful.
Well done for seeking advice and I hope it works out in the end

 

[Exploding Chestnuts]

Its not your foal, tell them that if you are asked to intervene at any stage you will want payment cash, for a week, and in advance, your charges are £7.00 per day plus materials, and vet charges will be to their account, not yours.
Otherwise thay can get YO to sort it out.
If it gets loose, stick it in an empty arena or a stable with water and hay and text the YO, asking for payment of £5.00 for your materials and your labour.
If you need to make an emergency vet callout, and they refuse to call one out or are not available, phone the rspca, ask for advice, they should send a vet out if it is an emergency.
If you are concerned about welfare ask the WHW to advise the owner. It is anonymous, just don't do it after a spat, do it when all is quiet.

 

[Princess16]

Oh God sounds a right nightmare. Has she never owned a horse before? If not I would type out a spreadsheet of ALL costs that owing a foal will entail. Might put her off! Will it be on full or part livery? That isn't going to be cheap either. Point out that she is effectively buying an expensive field ornament for at least 3 years (by which time she will probably have got fed up,of it anyway).

Families eh!

Good luck !

 

[DataLore]

GREAT news everyone! Just found out a few hours ago that the aunt has finally abandoned the idea of owning a foal, and has informed YO of her decision. Absolutely ecstatic with this because I'll be honest I've been pretty ill with worry about just what could have happened. I know that technically it's really none of my business, but I wasn't looking forward to seeing this particular type of disaster unfold. In answer to Princess16.. nope she had never seen hide nor hair of a horse except for a pony ride for her daughter once, then when she came to let her daughter ride mine, so you can see why I wasn't best pleased when she decided she was up to the task of owning a foal!

But of course that's all sorted out now, and I can breathe a huge sigh of relief knowing that it's all over! I don't think she's planning on buying anything more suitable, just flat out given up.. which is probably for the best unless she means to educate herself first, but if she asked my opinion on a real kids pony then I would be happy to help of course. I think that my efforts at showing her what a huge undertaking it is to own ANY horse finally put her off, and she realised that she didn't have the time to spare, and her finances could do without the strain. I did suggest that perhaps her daughter could offer to help out at some local riding schools to gain experience, and be around horses, so hopefully she'll get her 'horse fix' in a safe way now. Who knows maybe in a few years time when they've both gained some knowledge and experience they'll be ready to take a pony on loan/share, in which case it would be a joy to share my own hobby with another family member.

Thank you everyone for the help and support, you kept me sane! I've learned a lot about the care of weanlings from this episode too, so hopefully if it comes to pass in the (hopefully very distant!) future that I happen to end up with one, I'll know what I'm doing with it. It's been a learning curve that's for sure! ^^'

 

[Goldenstar]

Thank heaven for that, peace is restored .

 

[Spreebok]

Thank goodness!