Is it normal to feel like this when rehabbing?

[J_sarahd]

Going to preface this by saying I’m obviously going to keep doing the work I need to do to rehab Nova!

As some of you know, I’m currently rehabbing my 4 year old TB from kissing spine and I honestly feel mentally drained. I’m second-guessing everything, overanalysing, worrying whether I’m doing the right thing/asking in the right away, and genuinely feeling jealous of every one on the yard who gets to ride their horse.

I know Nova’s KS and our rehab is not as bad as what some people have had to go through. But is it normal to just feel like utter poo-poo about it?

I’ve contacted a rehab person to get their advice , a more robust plan in place - just general help. So hoping that gives me a bit more light-at-the-end-of-the-tunnel!

 

[meleeka]

Yes, in my experience, perfectly normal. After my last experience of box rest/in hand walking I promised myself I wouldn’t go through it again, but find a rehab yard to do it for me. The need didn’t actually arise again, but once was enough to put me off for life.

How far into it are you?

 

[GypsGal1718]

rehabbing from a tendon injury I don’t imagine is as hard as ks but I did feel like the boxrest was never ending and her walks were the only time she got out which was very sad for me

 

[J_sarahd]

Yes, in my experience, perfectly normal. After my last experience of box rest/in hand walking I promised myself I wouldn’t go through it again, but find a rehab yard to do it for me. The need didn’t actually arise again, but once was enough to put me off for life.

How far into it are you?

Yeah I wish I had the funds to send her on rehab livery!

We are a month in - so I know I have potentially many more months left to go.

 

[w1bbler]

Yes it's normal, essentially rehabing one (& obviously continuing management for life) has killed my love of horses.
I won't buy another.
What helped me to survive was a spell at rehab livery, if you could afford a few weeks you will get a bit of respite & hopefully a head start & good ongoing support. If you have someone localish, then they can then come out to you for regular support.
A few weeks break from the stress is fab, even if there isn't someone local

 

[doodle]

Oh yes I get the jealousy. Everyone off riding and having a great time. We have done 3 months box rest and have another 2 months field rest before starting rehab.

Previously tho I have actually enjoyed the actual rehab side and enjoy seeing the progress. That said I have needed fairly constant support from my physio saying we were on the right track and all is well. I like a fairly structured plan so I know what I am doing tho.

 

[Upthecreek]

Rehabbing is hard. Doing it in winter is even harder. Doing it on a yard watching everyone else riding and enjoying their horses makes it even worse. Give yourself a break and don’t feel bad for feeling bad. It sucks, but try to look forward to seeing some progress, which will help to make the hard slog worth it

 

[ownedbyaconnie]

Yes! I was lucky in a way that mine fell over summer. Whilst I missed the usual joys of late evening hacks in the sunshine and clear rounds on grass it was a lot more pleasant walking in hand on an early warm morning than in the pitch black in rain.

 

[SEL]

Totally! My lowest point was one in rehab from a suspensory injury, one on box rest after surgery and another retired. All in December / January so stabled overnight.

In all honesty no matter what sort of plan you have nor how diligent you are it just becomes a slog. Hopefully with a 4yo it'll be a slog with a worthwhile end in sight.

 

[Vodkagirly]

Going to preface this by saying I’m obviously going to keep doing the work I need to do to rehab Nova!

As some of you know, I’m currently rehabbing my 4 year old TB from kissing spine and I honestly feel mentally drained. I’m second-guessing everything, overanalysing, worrying whether I’m doing the right thing/asking in the right away, and genuinely feeling jealous of every one on the yard who gets to ride their horse.

I know Nova’s KS and our rehab is not as bad as what some people have had to go through. But is it normal to just feel like utter poo-poo about it?

I’ve contacted a rehab person to get their advice , a more robust plan in place - just general help. So hoping that gives me a bit more light-at-the-end-of-the-tunnel!

Totally normal. I find box rest very draining and rehab even harder. It's the constant work in all weather's with no excitement, overplayed with worry.
It does help me if I can get some riding in so I the past I've asked and borrowed someone else's- people are keen to get there's exercised at this time of year.

 

[Identityincrisis]

Oh God, yes!! I was on a hamster wheel of rehab for about 3 years, never getting beyond ridden walk. It is utterly soul destroying and watching others enjoying their horses is extremely hard, especially as i’d had my old horse retired for 4 years so i was looking forward to cracking on with a new youngster, it never happened with that horse. Just give yourself a break sometimes as it is very hard

 

[Widgeon]

Having a horse with a problem is very intense and mentally exhausting - don't underestimate the impact it can have on your own mental health.

Contacting a professional rehab person is a great idea, they'll be able to give you some perspective and point out all the encouraging signs that you're worrying too much to see.

Can you make sure you have some non-horsey fun activities planned for the next few months? Drinks with friends, a spa afternoon, that sort of thing? (assuming that's affordable for you). Personally I found that I became so consumed by the whole thing that it was very hard to see out. And if you have good horsey friends you can talk to, do that too. Just don't try to carry the whole weight of worry on yourself at all times. Very best wishes, and also remember that winter (and particularly this winter!) is pretty awful for everyone, so that won't be helping either.

 

[Landcruiser]

I spent last winter rehabbing my youngster with a stifle injury - I ended up sending her to a rehab yard for 2 months because I swear if she didn't kill me I was going to kill her. Looking back I don't know how we both got through it but we did (although she ended up with ulcers and I ended up with more grey hairs and an ever dwindling savings account). Low point - trying to hand walk furious, frustrated, biting 3 yr old during the 10 day big freeze. I made a chart and ticked off the days and the increasing exercise periods...this helped.

 

[Roasted Chestnuts]

Yes. I’m currently doing the same with Faran and I’m only on the restricted turnout phase wait until we get to the walking hacks/Longlining phase I’ve spent the last 4/5 weeks second guessing myself and worrying about this and that and the next thing it could turn into.

Keep going and just keep in mind the it’s things for them and you are trying your best

 

[CanteringCarrot]

Yes, it's absolutely soul sucking.

So sorry to anyone dealing with this. Everyday is one step closer to the end of the tunnel.

 

[dottylottie]

definitely feel your pain, thoroughly miserable for both parties i think, especially at this time of year! the biggest thing for me has been reminding myself taking things slower isn’t going to do them any harm - there’s only so much you can do, particularly with the weather.

 

[Season’s Bleatings]

Yep! I have been rehabbing my horse from a tendon injury and at times it has been SO stressful and hard. The actual work itself is fine, but the mental strain / fear of “what ifs” is difficult.
If you can plan in some respite for yourself, try to, I appreciate it is a bit of a luxury but it def helped my sanity. When we got to the hacking stage, our lad went to a local pro for a few weeks and I think it stopped us all from losing our minds

 

[ycbm]

I've been very lucky in my horse owning career that I've never had to do a proper rehab because the only horse I had who needed one carried through on his pre-existing desire to smash his own head to pieces. I really feel for you J-sarahd. I think your feelings are perfectly normal. I hope it all comes good for you and your lovely mare and you get a beautiful spring to enjoy being able to ride again.
.

 

[Ample Prosecco]

Going to preface this by saying I’m obviously going to keep doing the work I need to do to rehab Nova!

As some of you know, I’m currently rehabbing my 4 year old TB from kissing spine and I honestly feel mentally drained. I’m second-guessing everything, overanalysing, worrying whether I’m doing the right thing/asking in the right away, and genuinely feeling jealous of every one on the yard who gets to ride their horse.

I know Nova’s KS and our rehab is not as bad as what some people have had to go through. But is it normal to just feel like utter poo-poo about it?

I’ve contacted a rehab person to get their advice , a more robust plan in place - just general help. So hoping that gives me a bit more light-at-the-end-of-the-tunnel!

It is never easy but I think how stressful is needs to be depends on whether the issues are because the rehab itself is stressful (flying a 3/4 tonne kite), whether you aren't sure it's working or whether you miss riding. The first one is tricky but I'd conisder sedation - vets are quite supportive of this. For the 2nd, it takes mental discipline and patience, but you can become more balanced and rational. Over-analysing, second guessing etc are totally natural. But also optional! You can notice your brain heading down 'what if 'rabbit holes and decisively shut the door on those pointless internal conversations. A simple mantra like 'trust the process, the outcome will take care of itself' or 'do the work, forget the rest' or 'right now, just this' to keep you focused on the here and now and not the future might help.

As for missing riding, I did miss riding Lottie when I rehabbed her from her SI injury. I'd only just bought her and she went wrong within 3-4 weeks. But I also found ways to enjoy a different kind of relationship, and I think we both developed some trust in each other doing so much work on the ground. Plus I took her for hedgerow nibbles etc, which we both liked. So you might be able to find some positives in the situation, if you look for them, which might make it a little bit easier mentally.

And if you can afford it, and trust the quality of their work, definitely off-load some of the work to others! Good luck with it all x

 

[J_sarahd]

Thank you everyone, I’m glad I’m not alone in feeling rubbish about rehab. I’ve contacted a few rehab professionals so hopefully get some responses soon.

 

[rextherobber]

I think the first month is the worst, you miss riding etc, but it's surprising how quickly the unhand stuff becomes the new normal. It's absolutely the worst time of the year for anything horse related too... As things progress, you get to do more things, poles, backing a few steps, and as the evenings get lighter, you can go for inhand hacks maybe? I worked very closely with my horse's Physio, it was nice to have imput and a professional opinion every 4 weeks, sort of gave me an aim...Good Luck!

 

[oldjumper]

Going to preface this by saying I’m obviously going to keep doing the work I need to do to rehab Nova!

As some of you know, I’m currently rehabbing my 4 year old TB from kissing spine and I honestly feel mentally drained. I’m second-guessing everything, overanalysing, worrying whether I’m doing the right thing/asking in the right away, and genuinely feeling jealous of every one on the yard who gets to ride their horse.

I know Nova’s KS and our rehab is not as bad as what some people have had to go through. But is it normal to just feel like utter poo-poo about it?

I’ve contacted a rehab person to get their advice , a more robust plan in place - just general help. So hoping that gives me a bit more light-at-the-end-of-the-tunnel!

Things I have found helped is treating whole process as an ongoing bonding/training experience - for owner as much as horse. With KS it’s a whole different way of riding and schooling from now on. Also take photograph every week. When you look back over a few weeks and can see the difference in the horse’s conformation and way of going it gives a real sense of pride and achievement. Do your best but don’t beat yourself up if not every day perfect - and the objective of having a pain free horse that is a joy to ride is worth everything. Good luck!

 

[J_sarahd]

To make matters worse, I’ve royally wrecked my back so Nova has only done carrot stretches Tues and yesterday, and probably again today, as I can barely walk! I’m feeling even more guilty and that I’m not doing enough and she will go backwards.

On the plus side, I’m hoping to send her to rehab livery soon for 4-6weeks. Just sorting out a referral from my vets so I can put some/most of it through insurance.

 

[sbloom]

It's tough, really tough.

Thank you everyone, I’m glad I’m not alone in feeling rubbish about rehab. I’ve contacted a few rehab professionals so hopefully get some responses soon.

Choose carefully (I know you will, and that me saying it perhaps only makes it more overwhelming, sorry!), find one that looks at movement patterns and posture, and not just a fittening/strengthening regime, you need to correct the cause, which will at least in part be compensatory movement. Even in an unbacked horse.

To make matters worse, I’ve royally wrecked my back so Nova has only done carrot stretches Tues and yesterday, and probably again today, as I can barely walk! I’m feeling even more guilty and that I’m not doing enough and she will go backwards.

On the plus side, I’m hoping to send her to rehab livery soon for 4-6weeks. Just sorting out a referral from my vets so I can put some/most of it through insurance.

Do look after yourself as best you possibly can, make sure you have a good human osteo or similar to help you. I'd highly recommend Dan Wain Equestrian, from personal experience, though there are quite a few around these days that do rehab in the way I describe. I do think once you move forwards in this sort of direction you'll be developing your eye and your feel and, although it won't suddenly be much easier, you'll have different landmarks - not just how many minutes trot can they manage, but real changes in posture, muscling and even both yours and the horse's understanding of correct preventative type work. It can really take your horse management understanding forwards and feel like progress.

Good luck, and be kind to yourself

 

[Annagain]

I sold the horse instead

Slight exaggeration but even before his diagnosis Charlie and I had lost faith in each other. I did the in hand stuff but when it came to getting back on, I just didn't want to. He went to livery for rehab then sale and was sold with full disclosure and all his medical reports. Hardest decision I've ever made but it's worked out really well for both of us.

 

[HopOnTrot]

I was about to post exactly the same thing and then your post came up!

We had 4x lig snips in October (we had previously medicated but that had stopped working, steroids not an option).

I decided to do raised poles today, started off fine but after 10 minutes she started jumping them and then we had rearing and bucking (which as she is only 13.2 wasn't as dramatic as it sounds) did I push her too far? Is she still in pain? Or did she just get excited about poles? I feel so down about it now and having the girls at home means I have no yard mates to bounce ideas off.

I've been on a couple of KS groups on FB and they are horrible, they know much better than me (walking in hand in straight lines is too much and too little, massaging the back like my physio showed me, months after surgery is too soon etc etc) and unless I do classical dressage inhand (great with a warmblood, much harder with a bombproof New Forest who saves all her energy for eating) then she will never recover.

Physio came last month and was really pleased she could see a difference in the shape of her back (and I can too) but still not ready to get on yet, physio due back soon and I still think there is a sore spot opposite the site of surgery which will mean another month of not getting back on, it's the limbo I can't stand; if she comes back into lessons and some dressage that would be lovely, if we can only hack that's fine and if she retires I need to wait until my daughter is ready for 14.2 before we can get another.

On the plus side I've been having lessons locally which has been keeping me sane and getting me out riding new horses!

 

[J_sarahd]

I've been on a couple of KS groups on FB and they are horrible, they know much better than me (walking in hand in straight lines is too much and too little, massaging the back like my physio showed me, months after surgery is too soon etc etc) and unless I do classical dressage inhand (great with a warmblood, much harder with a bombproof New Forest who saves all her energy for eating) then she will never recover.

it's the limbo I can't stand; if she comes back into lessons and some dressage that would be lovely, if we can only hack that's fine and if she retires I need to wait until my daughter is ready for 14.2 before we can get another.

These two quotes from your post really resonated with me. I posted in a couple of the KS groups and I agree that they’re horrible. I had people telling me that their horse didn’t recover, some saying the op is the only “cure”, people saying different things about different types of exercises… it’s a lot. If I’ve learnt two things over the past two months, it’s 1) to trust my gut and 2) go off the advice of my trusted professionals (unless it’s obvious they don’t know what they’re talking about). They know the horse better than the people online. I’ll probably still post on here and on FB forums down the line, but I think for something as big as KS, you need the advice and guidance of your team.

I also agree with the “limbo” thing. I have said many times, I’ll be sad if she is a field ornament after this but at least I’ll have an answer. It’s not knowing that’s worse than a bad outcome in my opinion.

 

[HopOnTrot]

I think KS rehab has come a long way in recent years as even the plan the vet gave me, differs to what me and my physio have agreed, we know now that the rehab is the most important part and that's great, but we also hear a lot of stories about horses not recovering and we have no way to know if that's due to bad rehab, too little rehab, too fast rehab or just the horse not recovering.

The other thing about the limbo is my pony is so unique, she's the loveliest horse I have ever met and so easy to own (she's so quiet I'm 100% sure I could mix a martini and drink it whilst sat on her!), but she cost me £800, what are the chances of me finding a similar replacement for less than £5k?

On the plus side, the weather is so crap that coming in to do a load of stretches in the stable out of the rain/wind/snow/hurricanes IS helping and I'm quite enjoying not feeling the pressure to ride, I have 4 raised poles on the path to the stables so even just coming in and going back out helps!

 

[sbloom]

This should be a good group https://www.facebook.com/groups/globalequestriancollaborative/, just starting up.

 

[Winters100]

Poor you, that sounds really hard. Is there anyone else who can help you? Maybe a friend on the yard? One lady at our stable has a horse on extended box rest and I give him his morning walk each morning, then 2 days a week I also to the lunchtime one, and on those days another friend does the evening walk. This way she has to come only 5 days a week, and on those days 2 times rather than 3. I am not sure what your rehab involves, as in this case it is really simple, just walk in hand for 15 minutes, but maybe you can ask for help to give yourself a break?