Is it wrong to have a horse and not want to ride?

Holly Hocks

Holly Hocks

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Some of you may know that a couple of weeks ago I lost my 21 year old gelding and have been left with my 9 year old TB mare. She has recently been diagnosed with navicular in both front feet and an "irregular" proximal suspensory ligament in her left hind, believed to be old, not new. So she is having until at least next April off work. Stabled at night and out with her buddies during the day.

Now the thing is, I'm really really enjoying NOT riding. Not having the pressure to find time to fit in riding. I've always loved the looking after of the horses and the fact that I now have time to look after her properly is great. She has calmed down beyond all recognition now that she isn't being ridden (there were clearly pain issues when she was ridden), and is happier than I think I have seen her since I got her.
When she is re x-rayed and scanned end of March next year, if the ligament is better and the navicular has not deteriorated (she has had Tildren and will be going barefoot in the next couple of weeks), then I will start work from scratch with her again. But if the vet turns round and says that she isn't going to be able to do any work, I don't think I will be that bothered.
If I'm happy and my mare is happy, is it wrong to have her just as a large pet? Does it make me any less a horse person because I've decided that I don't want to ride? I've got the opportunity to ride a really nice horse on the yard at the moment as well, but I just don't want to!
 
Of course it's not wrong! I'm kind of in the same situation at the moment, my (oldish) boy has a serious tendon/ligament injury and although it should heal well the decision has been taken to retire him... Like you I'm enjoying just spending time with him/at the yard. YO is keen for me to ride some of the yard horses (and has just 'presented' me with a project pony) but I'm in no real rush to ride

:)
 
If you don't want to ride then that is totally up to you. Enjoy your time just mooching together. As winter sets in it does sound rather appealing I must say! :)
 
It's fine not to want to ride - I rarely ride my horse now, but I could never be without her, she is good for my inner peace. I groom her and give her time but I don't berate myself if I don't ride.
 
I was in a very very similar situation (appart fromlosing a grand old boy) my mare hurt herself and needed a good amount of time off, and I had a fantastic horse to ride very much like my girl and I just didnt want to, I forced myself to and every time I rode I compared if it spooked or did something I was all the time thinking mine wouldnt do that and I didnt enjoy riding, I was quite happy to go and muck out, lug water and haynets and just spend time with the girl and then when I got back on it was even more special and I enjoyed it 1000x more. Chin up enjoy the time you will spend on the ground as it will strengthen your bonds and it is very important and is often overlooked and neglected and trust me if and when your's is back on her feet, even for a tootle around the farm you will enjoy it and so will your girl but if not well the time that would be spent riding can be put into pampering and love and cuddles.

sorry about you losing your lad, it must be hard and I think its safe to say we all feel for you and sympathise and good luck for your mare and I hope she comes right for you.
HUGS!! Leah.
 
Absolutely not :)

I am one of these people who loves competing and being out at lessons and schooling but I have no facilities to do this, which leaves me merely hacking, and Id rather not ride than be bored plodding round mid winter in a muddy field freezing my nads off.

So these days I have youngsters and enjoy the ground work, until that is Ive saved enough to put in my own arena in which time my youngsters will be ready to break :)

xxx
 
You are no less a horse person simply because you don't ride! As mentioned before, riding isn't the be all and end all of horse ownership. Feeding, grooming, mucking out, arranging for farrier and vet are all part and parcel of this thing called being horsey. And yes, you can have and love a huge pet. I have 5 Shires and a very bad back, but that doesn't make me feel any less horsey. I haven't been on a horse since 1996 and I don't miss it at all. I love being in close proximity to my herd. Their personalities, interactions with me and each other, the sound of them contentedly munching on hay, and yes, even their odour, are great sources of pleasure for me. I know I work very hard to keep them healthy, happy, comfortable and safe. It is truly a labour of love. From what you've said, I think you must have similar feelings. Don't berate yourself for not wanting to ride.
 
I may be facing a future without the riding, weep, and am immediately looking at taking on a youngster with a view to handling and selling on, I just wish this could be self funding, as buyers are wanting to buy at below cost price, and really I can't afford to subsidise them!
I used to love riding out racehorses .... sitting on a fit horse really concentrates the mind, but now it is the wildlife and countryside, grooming and faffing that I enjoy, the riding is less important than it was.
 
Cudos to all the positive replies from everyone.

Holly hocks, I went through something very similar when I lost my old boy. I had no interest in riding my newboi but forced myself and it all ended very badly. I ended up pregnant the following year and it was the best thing that could have happened!

My oldie was in his mid 30-s when I lost him and I had spent years simply enjoying his company, looking after him and loving him, we hadn't ridden in a long time. So to me, having a horse had nothing to do with riding, its more so companionship and care.

Give yourself the freedom to love and enjoy your horse however you want to:)
 
Sorry for your loss Holly and thank you for starting this thread, because it's something I've been thinking about a lot over the past few months. The responses have been reassuring, I shall carry on being the village loony who takes her horse out for a walk in hand rather than riding him for a while longer :)
 
I don't ride very often. I got out of the habit when my old lad retired but thoroughly enjoy all of the groundwork, my chap is groomed for at least half an hour every day!
Markie was specifically bought as an old man to plod round the lanes once or twice a week. Hasn't quite worked out like that, but I have plenty of people who love riding him and are more than happy to go bombing over the downs whilst I do all of the work!
 
I dont ride my healthy 9 year old gelding.I am a bit nervous as lost my confidance,but I do lunge him,take him walkies and he loves to be groomed..One day I will get back on him. (when Im ready)
Hes not going anywhere.

At the end of the day, its your horse and if you dont want to ride,its your choice.Theres plenty of other things you can do on the ground.
 
I don't think it is wrong HH. A huge part of ownership for me of my late girl was just having a lovely large pet. I just loved spending time with her, riding was and is not a huge issue for me, I adore my hacking but ownership is what I love.

There is something wonderfully therapeutic about having a horse to pet imo.
When I hopefully get another soon, it is imperative to me that it will happily stand for hours chilling out being fussed over as I love my time out of the saddle.
So after much waffling what I am trying to say is I think it is perfectly normal to love having them as a pet and not ride them if they are happy with that arrangement too :)
 
I'm also one of the horse keepers that's not so keen on riding these days. I wouldn't want to be without my horses though, there's always plenty of other things to do. Mine get lots of Reiki when needed and I also do all of my TTEAM/TTOUCH work with them.
 
I think you will find more people have a horse and don't ride than do that is certainly the case at my livery yard.
As long as you enjoy your horse and your horse is happy then I have no problem in that.
 
Absolutely not! I haven't ridden my cob, since injuring my rotator cuff, and since losing my old racehorse, I've just not felt that bothered. I enjoy looking after my cob, grooming him, and just generally enjoying his company. I've always loved looking after them, and he certainly doesn't take the view "Oh Lord, she's not riding me!" He couldn't care less! So if you just want to look after your horse, then do it. Riding isn't the be all and end all. A lot of pleasure can be got just handling, and looking after them. Don't feel guilty about not riding. Its not wrong at all.
 
What a wonderful attitude , it would be so lovely if everyone could think like this - and before you all jump on me , i know everyones circumstances are different - but i know some people who have the attitude that if they break their horse they just go out and get a new one , selling on the old / injured one to an uncertain future.
When my old tbx had really bad arthritis in her hocks , i couldn't ride her , at the time i could only afford livery for one so i took the decision , although at the time it truely broke my heart , to have her PTS , i was shunned by most people at the yard as i suppose they felt i should have kept her as a pet - i still regret this now , especially as i now have my own small holding and could have retired her - any of my others that get old / unridable will always be kept as pets.
 
Totally understand, I haven't ridden for a good few months and it really doesn't bother me. I had an operation and now I'm pregnant and I do plan to potter about on my old horse occasionally but no strenuous riding.

The rest of our gang are youngsters or injured and to be honest I actually love the general handling and teaching them new things more than riding. :)
 
Not wrong of course, but if I couldn't ride my lot I wouldn't have them. Yes I also enjoy all the feeding/grooming/mucking out stuff, but in the heel of the hunt it's all about the riding. Too big/expensive/labour intensive to be pets!
 
My old mare had to retire two years ago and my gelding who was supposed to replace her as my riding horse is out of action, probably for good. I am gutted as he was just perfect to ride. In fact even though my mare was my horse of a lifetime, I actually preferred the way may gelding felt to ride as he was so forward and light but yet not at all spooky or quirky. Just perfect! Since I can't ride him I have lost all enjoyment in riding. I have to ride my livery horses and loads of people have offered me the ride on theirs, but riding other people's is just not the same. I can't afford and don't have the space for another horse to ride so I guess if I can't ride him, then I won't enjoy riding again. I am more than happy to care for the horses though and thoroughly enjoy that part of it.

So no, I do not think you are wrong in the way you feel. In fact, your horse is very lucky to have you as many people would be resenting having to care for a horse they cannot ride. So good on you!
 
No it's not the be all and end all. I love just taking my boy for a walk. I just treat him like one of the dogs and he pootles around the farm with us. People think in weird as I can easily ride him around the farm
 
I'm glad so many others feel the same!!! :D I still enjoy riding but it's not the be all and end all any more, i've never been competitive so riding has always been purely for pleasure. Now i get as much pleasure out of working with them on the ground and caring for them:) and as my daughter is now riding more i find i spend more time with her and her ponies then i do riding mine and that's fine.
I enjoy the groundwork so much that today i'm getting a little 2 yr old on loan from a friend, he's hardly been touched so will be a lovely project to occupy me over the winter:D
 
No of course it's not wrong however I don't understand why anyone would not want to ride as I just live for it but if you are enjoying caring for your girl and it makes you happy and importantly she is happy that's great however I do think some horses are much happier working than being large pets but if you are both happy go for it.
 
I am too tired to ride thesedays so I know how you feel. With my job, two young children and no car so the yard is a twohour round trip, most of which is spent walking, I really have notot the energy to ride once I get there! I ride or excerise the children's pony twice through the week and they sort him out at weekends. My youngster jsut wants love and cuddles at the mo and as he is a highland he will be having every winter off until he matures. I'm delighted at this news! The cold especially just drains me of energy - I'm no spring chicken anymore. Just enjoy them, that's what they are here for. Everyone gets something different out of horses., One lady on our yard adopted a shetland that can never be ridden, just because she likes being around horses yet has no desire to ride. She spends as much as we do on our ridden animals and is just as happy. She certainly doesn't feel as if she is wasting her money.
 
Thanks for all your replies. I don't feel quite so silly now!
I took the horse that I had been offered the ride on for a hack this morning. To be honest, I didn't enjoy it. There was nothing wrong with the horse (apart from having to ride in a GP saddle. I've ridden in dressage saddles for the last 10 years and I forgot how uncomfortable I found it, riding in GP saddles!) but I would just have preferred not to have been doing it!
 
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