Issues with loaning

[Meghan]

Hi there, I have been loaning a horse for 4 years and have completely fallen in love with him. I absolutely love soenidng time at the yard I am at but I’ve come to the realisation that people are taking advantage of my niceness. The owner has taken a step back completely and is always working so I am often left with all the work( which is completely fine) and of course the riding.
When I first started loaning I did yard duties for one horse and got to ride. This then slowly turned into looking after her other horse on the days I was up. This other horse then became injured and is out of work, so I now find myself constantly getting her from the field and never having time for the horse I actually loan.
Due to the owner rarely being up others at the yard often come to me if they have noticed any issues with the horse I loan. This then leads to me trying my best to make everyone around me happy and coming up with solutions to others problems. I’m finding that when I come home from the yard I haven’t destressed I’m more stressed than when I went up. Has anyone got any advice on how to ensure I enjoy my expienraxe as much as possible? I hate complaining about the horses/duties as if I told myself 7 years ago I would be lucky enough to have this expiernce I would never complain but I’m feeling a bit lost and looking for some wise words. X

 

[Winters100]

Oh that doesn't sound great You need to have a good chat with the owner in my opinion. Explain that you are happy to help out with her other horses in an emergency, but that you cannot be responsible for them.

May I ask what is the situation on the yard? Are they DIY? If so she needs to step up and take care.

Good luck.

 

[AmyMay]

Simply tell the owner of the other horse that you’re no longer in a position to help. And then just enjoy your ‘own’ horse.

Simples ?

 

[SaddlePsych'D]

I hate complaining about the horses/duties as if I told myself 7 years ago I would be lucky enough to have this expiernce I would never complain but I’m feeling a bit lost and looking for some wise words. X

I am similar to you in terms of being grateful for opportunities and experience with horses as someone who has never had their own. I think it's a good attitude to have to not be afraid to get stuck in, but! I do also think we need to be aware that some people will spot this a mile off and take the p. Not saying that's intentionally what's happening in your situation, I just think it's worth remembering it's okay to have boundaries - it doesn't make you unwilling or unkind.

What sorts of things are people coming to you about? I think if I were you I'd be redirecting them back to the owner as much as possible i.e. "I think you need to ask X about that" or "I'm really aware the horse is X's not mine so I would run that past X"

With the doing extra stuff bit I think I'd be evaluating how far you've come away from your original agreement in terms of what you're putting in and getting out.

 

[Meghan]

Simply tell the owner of the other horse that you’re no longer in a position to help. And then just enjoy your ‘own’ horse.

Simples ?

Thank you! I feel as though this is the right thing to do just wasn’t sure so thank you for your reassurance x

 

[Meghan]

I am similar to you in terms of being grateful for opportunities and experience with horses as someone who has never had their own. I think it's a good attitude to have to not be afraid to get stuck in, but! I do also think we need to be aware that some people will spot this a mile off and take the p. Not saying that's intentionally what's happening in your situation, I just think it's worth remembering it's okay to have boundaries - it doesn't make you unwilling or unkind.

What sorts of things are people coming to you about? I think if I were you I'd be redirecting them back to the owner as much as possible i.e. "I think you need to ask X about that" or "I'm really aware the horse is X's not mine so I would run that past X"

With the doing extra stuff bit I think I'd be evaluating how far you've come away from your original agreement in terms of what you're putting in and getting out.

People asking me about saddle issues and bringing the vet out which is something I have very little control over. The answers you have given me are really helpful and will definitely use them! Your so right with taking a step back to overview how much I’m taking on. Thank you so much for your wise words really appreciate it! x

 

[SaddlePsych'D]

People asking me about saddle issues and bringing the vet out which is something I have very little control over. The answers you have given me are really helpful and will definitely use them! Your so right with taking a step back to overview how much I’m taking on. Thank you so much for your wise words really appreciate it! x

You're welcome, I hope you can figure things out soon. A conversation with the owner to re-establish whether the agreement is still working for both of you would be a good idea.

Why are others coming to you about these issues? Is the owner aware these things are being raised?

 

[Meghan]

You're welcome, I hope you can figure things out soon. A conversation with the owner to re-establish whether the agreement is still working for both of you would be a good idea.

Why are others coming to you about these issues? Is the owner aware these things are being raised?

Owner aware just isn’t making action on the matters. This then stresses me out but i feel as though it’s not my place to ask for vet to come out as I am aware of the cost ect x

 

[SaddlePsych'D]

Owner aware just isn’t making action on the matters. This then stresses me out but i feel as though it’s not my place to ask for vet to come out as I am aware of the cost ect x

Others on here more experienced than me might want to come in with a view on this as I'm speaking from a novice perspective, but I think I would feel very uncomfortable with this situation. It might be a case of others having different opinions and getting unnecessarily involved but if there is a genuine issue/cause for concern around vet care or saddle issues then these need to be directed to the owner, who needs to respond/take things in hand. I'd also consider whether I should be riding the horse in such circumstances.

 

[maya2008]

Is this a full loan (you pay for everything incl livery, feed, bedding, sort out saddle and vet etc as needed) or more like a share where you do chores/pay a bit in return for riding?

 

[Wishfilly]

People asking me about saddle issues and bringing the vet out which is something I have very little control over. The answers you have given me are really helpful and will definitely use them! Your so right with taking a step back to overview how much I’m taking on. Thank you so much for your wise words really appreciate it! x

If you are riding the horse, you should be concerned about saddle issues and problems requiring vet attention, though. In most full loans, it's fairly normal for the loaner to let the owner know they need the vet out- how this is paid for should have been discussed in advance and ideally be in the loan agreement.

This sounds like perhaps a more informal arrangement that has evolved into a full loan, so I would suggest talking to the owner about formalising the loan with a contract, so you pay all costs for your loan horse and perhaps have a bit more control, and then state that you are no longer able to help with the other one, except in an emergency. It sounds like having some formal boundaries put in place would benefit you?

 

[JulesRules]

I'm assuming from your post that this is a share/ part loan whereby you ride someone's horse several days a week and on that day carry out yard chores related to the share horse, and that you may or may not be paying a contribution to the horse's costs.

I started out my horse journey as a sharer, and now 18 or so years later own 2 horse's, one of which has a sharer, so I have experienced this from both sides.

For me a horse share must work for all involved to be successful, that includes owner, sharer and the also the horse. It sounds like the current situation may be working more for the owner than you currently.

I'm not sure if the vet and saddle questions relate to your share horse or the owner's other horse. If the other horse I'd simply redirect anyone to the owner.

If the questions relate to your share horse you may need to consider if you have any cause for concern e.g an ill fitting saddle making him buck, or is it just a case of another nosey livery just getting involved for their own reasons (e.g. they want to try to sell you an old saddle). Without k owing the situation,I can't tell you. Ifyiu have a genuine concern then raise it with the owner. If it then doesn't get sorted you would then need to consider if this is the right share for you? Good sharers are like gold dust in my experience so don't undervalue yourself. On the other hand if you are very attached to the horse you might need to sort it yourself, with the owners consent. When I was a sharer I often paid for the dentist or body worker as I was the only person riding him.

In terms of the chores with the other horse, it sounds like a situation that's evolved over time and maybe the owner doesn't realise there is an issue? My first step would be to just have a chat with the owner. Maybe there is a compromise that can be reached? Perhaps you could do both horses one day and then just ride with no chores the next?

I hope this helps.