Let the livery yard politics begin......

Well, I have managed to avoid it for nearly three months now....but it had to happen sooner or later.

Gossip, paranoia, jealousy, cold shoulders, glares, who believes what about who!

I'm trying VERY hard to keep away from the peppered atmosphere of the yard but there are still some that are desperate to reel me in!
 
F

frb

Well-Known Member
Joined
5 March 2008
Messages
468
Visit site
How horrible. Just try to turn up, be polite but keep your head down, do your horse and then leave. Don't get involved, not always easy but the best thing!
 
OMG really feel for you. I have had no experience of yards as I am lucky enough to keep my horses at home on family farm,but I saw things first hand when I recently visited my pal who had just moved to Warwickshire. When she first moved all was well, everyone was friendly and welcoming but then she started to get ignored by some, then more and knew people were talking behind her back. She has no idea why this happened and like you had been friendly but kept herself to herself. I really feel for everyone in this position, you should look forward to going to see your horses, not dread it. Why are people like this?
 
How horrible. This is why I always stick to small yards, far less going on. I can't understand why yards get like this, there is no need !! Hope you manage to stay away from it all and just enjoy your horses.
 
I don't know why people are like this. To be honest, I have a fabulous career and very lucky to have what I have. These people seem to be at the yard 24/7 and have very lonely lifestyles.

Fulfilling their lives in this way is odd to me but I suppose where I use my brain they use their tongues to wag all day.

Bless them.
 
I can sympathise, I've been on my yard three months as well and it's the same. However, I confronted the troublemaker about what she was saying behind my back and I have to say it's now much better as we don't speak at all. I had to get it off my chest, why should these vile people get away with it?
 
Three sets of people all went to the same show today from the yard each with 1 horse. Two of them went in separate 3 horse 7.5t lorries and one in a trailer...... Wonder what the impact on the environment was of that - why they can't get on and share trips I just don't know!
 
I can't understand why the horsey world is so pathologically bitchy!! You'd think we'd at least be united by our love of the horse..... clearly not
crazy.gif
 
It is usually those who are there allot. One has only a few GCSEs to her name and will never move on. I cannot imagine how blinkered she is - its truly astonishing.

They forget there is a world outside of the yard. I can appreciate how easy it is to fall into this way of life and assemble alliances with others in the same position. I just find it very odd.
 
it's like that at my yard i try to go when i know no one will be there as it drives me mad. they always have to be better than everyone else the ones at my yard.
 
My last yard used to be like that - drove me insane - worked from home at the time so used to do as much as I could mid morning when there was no one around. Only problem was that small child obviously had to go to school and could only ride later in the day when there were plenty of bitchy folk around. Am v. glad that we are on a farm now with just our horses.....
 
There are a few who are great fun and also try to keep away from all the bull talk. I am just glad to hear other people have experienced this too.
 
We have just affiliated BE and all of a sudden mothers whose kids are not happy or confident even SJ at 2'6" are starting entering their poor offspring in ODE's and planning to intro before the end of the season! We keep ourselves to ourselves, do not get involved in yard politics and I think there are some that dont like this - and more that are not happy the little gangly youngster i picked up for a song a couple of years ago has blossomed into a very serious and talented pony....
 
It's getting worse now too with the advent of internet experts unfortunately. It's mostly people who think they know a lot but actually know naff all! What it really comes down to is jealousy. Jealousy of what they don't have but also jealousy of what they don't know!

Rely on your own knowledge and sense and as long as you do right for your horse then you can hold your head up!
 
I had very similar troubles while I was looking after my friend's horse as she travelled during her gap year. Initially everyone was very friendly but once I had been to a few shows and been placed well and they found out I was going to Uni the following year everything changed and they decided I was 'stuck up'. Just kept well out of it as I found it so humorous that they could say that despite me offering several of them lifts to shows and always being happy to look in on any of their horses on their request if they couldn't make it to the yard for any reason! I sympathise hun - it isn't easy but don't let that stop you enjoying your horses and being yourself!
 
Thank you very much. The horse on the right is the one I've just brought back from Turkey. That was her meeting her old field companion for the first time. Shame I couldn't have brought him too but he's getting on a bit and it wouldn't have been fair for the poor old boy.
 
I have decided, that those that start all the yard nastiness really are people who have nothing in their lives other than their horses. I have concluded that this is why they are so utterly brilliant and I am so rubbish. It is also why they feel they need to stick their unwanted nose into everything I do.

Keep your head held high and ignore them. Or, if that fails, tell them that when you grow up, you want to be just like them - but dead.

This is what I did just before I moved 3 months ago and there isn't a sniff of b!tchyness at my new yard either that or I've missed it!
grin.gif
 
Its awful when the bitches start,u do right to stay away,rise above them!!Have been on too many yards full of these numpties....however yard am on now everyone is lovely
smile.gif
 
"These people seem to be at the yard 24/7.."
Yes you are right!!!!

That's because they have nothing else to do, whereas you turn up ride, do your thing and leave.

Politics are terrible, and you either have to manage them and not let them emotionally. Or move yards.
i had to do it in the past, sad I know but someone people can be so wrapped in jealously it is destructive.

My worst were when one fancied my husband (like mad) and was making a pass at him all the time. despite being a body builder, he was terrified of her!
She would always "need a man's help" when he would pop up to see to the horses for me.

Then there were two who hated when we bought the wagon, would make nasty comments about any show/event we went to etc....

Gosh, it is awful really, I do find FULL LIVERY ONLY marginally better, and we changed to this several (about 8 years) ago.

Now we are onyl a year away from completing this house and having land and horses at home!
But it has taken a long time to get there.

Good luck, and remember this is a hobby you wish to enjoy!
 
oh my god this sounds awful im so glad my yard isnt like that - ive had a few try and upset the apple cart and they have been politely asked to leave !!


does your yard owner not say anything ??
 
we had someone like this at my old yard (which I have now gone back to weirdly enough) - she couldn't help but cause trouble and start gossip - I used to just make um, and yes noises at her until she realised it was a waste of time as I wasn't interested - she got thrown out in the end, much to everyones relief!
 
As others have said before, an iPod is a blessing. Plug it into your ears (don't even have to switch it on) and not only don't you hear them muttering in the background, they don't try and talk to you. I don't need to do this at my yard since with only two other liveries I'm very lucky not to need to, but I do use it on the bus and the train when commuting a zillion miles to work, and it works an absolute charm. In cases like this, ignorance really is bliss.
 
Our yard is great, there are no politics at all. But have been on the yard from hell before where actually the YO was the biggest instigator of all for stirring etc. I always think it has to affect the horses with all the negativity and bad atmospheres on bitchy livery yards.
 
Might be a silly question, but how much would an ipod cost me?? Am having a few yard problems of my own, & reckon that would solve it!! Also are they easy to use, I am a total technophobe. Thanks
 
Mine is actually a Samsung YP-U1 - it's a tiny thing, smaller than a USB pen drive, and was £90 three years ago when OH got me it for Christmas. The newer version of the same thing is now more like £30-£40 and can fit anywhere from 200 to 500 songs on - plenty to get you through mucking out! To switch mine on simply click the on/off button, volume is the up/down button, next or previous song is the left/right button and that's about it! Getting music on is the same as moving a file to a different folder. When I plug mine into the computer it shows up as E drive, and I then just copy and paste my music over.

Whichever type you choose, iPod or whatever, make sure you get a rechargeable one (usually USB-rechargeable), not one that needs batteries or you'll be forever buying more to keep it going.
 
I agree Rayado - 'full livery only' yards tend to be much better; there's less for people to quarrel and squabble about, I suppose.

But you know it's not just livery yards - there are awful people like this on Internet forums as well, jealous people who just can't seem to cope with someone else's success, and have to b*tch and carp all the time and/or unsufferably smug, self-satisfied people who are always preaching and pontificating, poking their noses into other people's business and trying to tell them what to do.

There is (thank goodness) very little of this on here, but some other forums are rife with it. One assumes these people must lead very sad, dull little lives, if they really have nothing better to do with their time than b*tching and preaching - either at their yards or on the Internet.
 
Thanks Chillidragon, will defo be off to the shops, then I won't have to listen to all the s*** just lovely, soothing music, hmmnn, heaven!!
smirk.gif
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top