Livery Yard Dynamics

[Glitterandrainbows]

I only got a space on my yard because my friend was already there and she luckily has the social skills that I can tag along with her most of the time. So far the closest friends I have made on my own are another livery's two children (6 and 3). We play "Lock Smolmaus in the stable" a lot and they give me small shiny stones as gifts. The barn cat also likes me, I think.

Hilarious my daughter did this to the me and equine dentist when she was younger

 

[Flowerofthefen]

We have a large livery yard near us and the stuff that goes on there is unbelievable!! How anyone can enjoy their horse there I don't know. I'm with one other person on my yard. I try and keep myself to myself.

 

[AShetlandBitMeOnce]

We have a large livery yard near us and the stuff that goes on there is unbelievable!! How anyone can enjoy their horse there I don't know. I'm with one other person on my yard. I try and keep myself to myself.

The ones who remain sane find themselves saying 'Oh, I've not heard anything about it to be honest' and then carrying on with their day. It's exactly how I stay away from drama - the less I know, the less I am responsible for.

 

[Birker2020]

The ones who remain sane find themselves saying 'Oh, I've not heard anything about it to be honest' and then carrying on with their day. It's exactly how I stay away from drama - the less I know, the less I am responsible for.

I have always found it hard to not get involved in yard politics. Sometimes it is very hard not too. I am better than I was, but where you get a lot of women, you will inevitably get a lot of bitching.

And sometimes you can be too honest for your own good, but not in a way that you intend to cause a problem by saying it, just that you say things sometimes without engaging brain first. Is it better to be honest and truthful? Or to keep one's mouth shut but doubt that is the right course of action and then feel ? Rock and a hard place spring to mind.

 

[Flowerofthefen]

I have always found it hard to not get involved in yard politics. Sometimes it is very hard not too. I am better than I was, but where you get a lot of women, you will inevitably get a lot of bitching.

And sometimes you can be too honest for your own good, but not in a way that you intend to cause a problem by saying it, just that you say things sometimes without engaging brain first. Is it better to be honest and truthful? Or to keep one's mouth shut but doubt that is the right course of action and then feel ? Rock and a hard place spring to mind.

It's definitely rock and hard place. I keep my mouth shut. If someone asks how so and so is getting on I just say I don't know. If they want to know they can ask that person directly. Only time I would say something is if the horse is in danger.

 

[AShetlandBitMeOnce]

I have always found it hard to not get involved in yard politics. Sometimes it is very hard not too. I am better than I was, but where you get a lot of women, you will inevitably get a lot of bitching.

And sometimes you can be too honest for your own good, but not in a way that you intend to cause a problem by saying it, just that you say things sometimes without engaging brain first. Is it better to be honest and truthful? Or to keep one's mouth shut but doubt that is the right course of action and then feel ? Rock and a hard place spring to mind.

Chant at yourself 'not my circus, not my monkeys' repetitively until you have forgotten what it is you thought you knew. The people who are b1tching don't care about your opinion or your honesty, they want you to either corroborate what they have said so they feel justified and like they have an ally, and so that they can say you backed them should it come to anything. Or, if you don't agree, they want to be able to also then b1tch about you too. Only a friend cares about your honest opinion, and the request for it will not come via the form of b1tching.

You have nothing to gain, and everything to lose. Plead ignorance, even if you do think you know.

Good phrases are 'nowt funnier than folk' - means you find it odd but it is what it is, not much you can reply to that to engage further b1tching
'oh, how funny' - absolutely no indication what 'funny' actually means
'each to their own'
'I have no idea, I've been a man on a mission this week so not noticed anything'
'Hmm, I wonder what the vet said to do' - closes down speculation and further discussion.