Loaners - unrealistic expectations

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Fides

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I have recently lost my very good loaner due to her getting her own horse so have advertised my mare again. She is a 14h2 6yo who I have been bringing on slowly so have been quite specific about what I can't allow. The good points are that there are no jobs, just riding, floodlit school, off road hacking, I have a 1hr lesson a week which I split with the loaner for free, and there is the opportunity to compete if that is what the loaner wants. The only things I don't want are -
Anyone under 16 as I don't want to be responsible for someone else's child, complete novices, as she is only 6 and although 'bomb proof' she would get confused with a kick and pull rider, and no one over 10st.

Well today I have had an enquiry from a 14 year old girl who has been riding for 6 months and weighs 12 stone. When I politely declined she got quite rude with me.

I don't think I am being unreasonable - I am only putting the rider and my horses safety first.

This happens every time I try to loan. I get so many unrealistic people before finding someone right for her. But then because she is so good she gives them the confidence to get their own horse.

Oh well - here's hoping for the perfect little rider...
 
My words to a stroppy 14yr old would have been "piss off fatty" and then I would have hung up the phone :)

Your horse, do what you want with it and if you have to wait for the right person then you have to wait. Im looking for a sharer and have such a great horse but so far only a couple of unsuitable people have enquired ... im gobsmacked to be honest (and no keyboard warriors I don't think it will be my attitude putting them off, lol)
 
Arghh, been there!
I was looking for someone to ride my pony as I work, have a toddler and run a small business, so pony is just sitting in paddock getting fat (and enjoying it, I think ;) ).
Offered him to a young lass who lived just up the road as I know her loan pony had fallen through. Young girl can drive and is at equine college, so I thought she'd be ok. I stressed that he was unfit and unshod so she'd have to take it slowly to get him fit and used to roadwork again. She said that was fine. I found out later that she went hacking for almost 2 hrs of roadwork with a neighbour and then complained that he was lame! No F'ing way, REALLY!!!!
 
Just posted a mini rant about this. I simply want someone to ride in the school or hack and be competent enough not to fall off when he trots and who won't take the p!ss and gallop endlessly or want to jump 5ft! Why is it so hard and why do people think they shouldn't pay?! :(
 
cinnamontoast said:
Just posted a mini rant about this. I simply want someone to ride in the school or hack and be competent enough not to fall off when he trots and who won't take the p!ss and gallop endlessly or want to jump 5ft! Why is it so hard and why do people think they shouldn't pay?! :(
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I pay people to do this .
 
Goldenstar said:
I pay people to do this .
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This is a good point

There is a very fine line between thinking that you are doing someone a favour by offering a loan/share and wanting someone to keep your horse/pony ticking over because you are too busy/have too many etc - that is a service that many pay for

Not suggesting that anyone here is doing that but its something that most of us will have seen at some point
 
I've been paying and decided I'd try a sharer - been right royally stung. I know people who have good honest sensible sharers though so they do exist. I'm going to be optimistic and go again!
 
I have a lovely kind mare and I just want to give someone the opportunities I had when I was young. A lovely lady let me ride her horse in exchange for paying for his shoes and doing some jobs. As someone with non horsey parents this was a fantastic start for me and I would love to do someone the same favour. It just seems like such hard work finding someone though. I don't need anyone to school them for me, I'm just offering rides for a bit of money. I'm not expecting any jobs to be done either as mine are out 24/7 - seems people want to ride for free and make me feel like they are doing me a favour. Jog on and pay at a riding school for a dead to the leg donkey, is my response (in my head of course). I guess I will just carry on riding my ponies myself and selfishly not share the joy of them...
 
And there lies part of the problem. Many of us were given that golden opportunity by someone generous when we were young..... ie under 16

But with the exception of finding someone 16-18 and still in school chances are your person will be someone with bills to pay and/or someone with a job so you are dealing with people with different motivations and expectations for their money
 
We had a sharer for my sons horse. She paid £15 per week for riding & no jobs a very experienced, fun horse. Once the relationship was established there was the odd week when she poo picked instead of paying if I was busy. He took her to her first dressage & SJ comps getting placed every time & is a really safe hack. The reason I asked for a financial contribution was as much to demonstrate a commitment as anything else. She was a decent rider, but not good enough for me to pay. Once HP is fit enough again & we are sorted out with a second horse we will probably chat to her again about resurrecting the arrangement. But as she saved HPs life & we know she is reliable it will be a different basis.
 
I'm someone looking for a share, and I don't mind paying in the slightest. I don't mind doing jobs. I consider it part and parcel of what looking after and being able to ride a horse is. I'm a returning rider, and I know I'm not the best but I am aiming to improve on that hence looking for a share rather than just going out and getting my own.

I've even volunteered to do time at my local riding school mucking out etc just to get more experience.

Now if only I could find a share!
 
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I too ask for a small contribution, not so much to cover costs, as to make sure there is a genuine commitment to an ongoing relationship. Even if sharer knows what they're doing, it takes time and effort getting them used to your horses and set-up, and there are so many unreliable people out there who will take your time and goodwill, then just disappear.

I ask for £30 pcm for a loose agreement on my kids ponies - unlimited riding on the pony that best suits, which changes over time as the child improves. I'm very happy for mum to accompany on one of the other ponies, or to bring out a friend sometimes etc.

However, it would be different if I were expecting a loaner to 'improve' the horse. Then I'd expect them to ride for free, or to pay them, depending on experience.
 
I have just started to advertise for a sharer . We have a lovely little horse that the kids are just too busy to ride enough. I dont want to part with him as he is such a genuine sort. I had a girl coming to ride, no meny involved but she has messed me about so told to stop coming . I will expect a little bit towards his keep. he is unshod, lives out all summer so really his only costs are hay in the winter . More than happy with a few quid towards that and some poo picking . Welcome to take to shows and ride as often as they like . Seems to be impossible to find someone like that at the moment .
 
I have had similar issues for the last couple of years trying to find someone to help keep my mare fit while im away. I never asked for money. We were very lucky in finding someone for my husband's horse who is still great 2 yrs on, but have had many false starts with my mare. Eventually I gave up! Then the young lady who does the horses for us on a Sunday asked if her 14 yr old sister could take over and we agreed. She had recently grown out of and sold her 14.2. I knew her vaguely as she was at PC with my stepson a few years ago. I said she could have a ride on my mare. She did great and is now having a weekly lesson on her with a local instructor and hacking her out regularly.

Long story short, this 14 yr old is way more reliable, appreciative and generally nice than a the adults we have tried sharing with. I had always said no kids on my adverts, but probably wouldn't in future.
 
12 stone is not heavy compared to me lol! But then I wouldn't ask to ride a 6 year old 14.2 pony as I know I'll be too big.
I keep looking at adverts just out of interest, and noticed one advert on preloved. Just quoting the bit that would have put me off enquiring even if I was looking
NO novices/timewasters/under 18's/day dreamers
I wonder what day dreamers are? lol
 
I reckon day dreamers are the ones who really want a horse share and are super keen for the first two weeks until they realise they can't afford it/don't have time/their mum (who didn't give permission) finds out!
 
Ormsweird said:
I'm someone looking for a share, and I don't mind paying in the slightest. I don't mind doing jobs. I consider it part and parcel of what looking after and being able to ride a horse is. I'm a returning rider, and I know I'm not the best but I am aiming to improve on that hence looking for a share rather than just going out and getting my own.

I've even volunteered to do time at my local riding school mucking out etc just to get more experience.

Now if only I could find a share!
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Not near me, are you?!

Wiz201 said:
12 stone is not heavy compared to me lol! But then I wouldn't ask to ride a 6 year old 14.2 pony as I know I'll be too big.
I keep looking at adverts just out of interest, and noticed one advert on preloved. Just quoting the bit that would have put me off enquiring even if I was looking
NO novices/timewasters/under 18's/day dreamers
I wonder what day dreamers are? lol
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They're the people I've had turn up-yes, I can ride then wobble round precariously in walk before I have to get them off because they're making his mouth bleed! :frown3:
 
My ponies were on loan last year to 2 14yr olds. The came back just as he was left amd the girl was upset ending it so still sees him. She is appreciative for the opportunity. The other pony came back very on edge, wouldn't stand to let you get on and basically ruined. She hasn't once said thankyou either.

I'm trying to find sharers but they all talk the talk but cant back it up. They say they can walk, trot, canter and jump a small jump but put them on the ponies and they cant even hold the reins. They don't like it when i say no to them. The ones that can ride will come a couple of times then get talked into riding bigger and fancier horses of other liveries so they leave my ponies.
It's actually very depressing trying to find the right person.
 
cinnamontoast said:
They're the people I've had turn up-yes, I can ride then wobble round precariously in walk before I have to get them off because they're making his mouth bleed! :frown3:
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Sugar_and_Spice said:
I reckon day dreamers are the ones who really want a horse share and are super keen for the first two weeks until they realise they can't afford it/don't have time/their mum (who didn't give permission) finds out!
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Ahh right!
 
D'oh. Now I feel fat. :( (I'm a bit over 12st - and 6 ft tall.)

Kidding.

I think kids like that need to be made aware that their weight can be a health risk to the horse and to themselves. I share a 17hh irish draft mare. She can carry my weight, but with anything smaller I need to be super balanced as to not unbalance the horse. Now I will never be a lithe fairy due to my height and build, so I just pick a horse that's capable of carrying both of us.

I too don't mind doing jobs (I think it's part of the deal) and actually spend a bit of money on my share as I live quite close to central London.
 
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I was a sharer in my early twenties, I wasn't sure that I could justify owning a horse as I didn't feel confident enough financially but sharing gave me the opportunity to commit to investing X amount per month (started off at around £120 then to about £250 just before I bought one) a month without the worry of not being able to provide for a horse if it did indeed work out more than I thought.

I like to think that I rode the horses as the owner instructed and apart from forgetting to put the lid back on the cortaflex properly once I don't think I committed any major sins.

I have to say I advertised for a sharer for my mare, adult sharer for a 13.2hh pony and I didn't have a single response :(
 
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