Losing the love for horses

asommerville

asommerville

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Having found myself in the position in the past 3 years where I've lost 2 horses, my mare has just been diagnosed As a head shaker and things aren't looking positive... I know at the end of the day things could be worse but the prospect of losing a other one has left me absolutely gutted - again and I'm thinking that I just can't be bothered having horses in the future....has anyone found they've lost their horsey mojo? Did you get it back? I just think I'd be better horseless and with less worry......

I know this is a totally stupid self pitying post but whenever I mention giving up I hear 'oh you wouldn't like not having a horse'! I think I would I would have money if nothing else!
 
It is hard sometimes it feels like nothing is going right and you have obviously not had much luck so you will feel like packing it all in, I think part of owning horses can be such a lovely experience but it can also cause you such heartache all I can say is I hope things start to get better for you only you will know if you truly can't carry on.

I have been through several times when I just couldn't be bothered and just felt like giving up but I always seem to kick myself up the butt and I then snap out of it, last time was when I had my mare pts and I just wasn't interested in my new horse just didn't want him, but I realised I just had to get on with it or sell him which I didn't want to do was just starting to really get on with him and he went lame, his booked in for an mri but he has changes in the navicular bone had it treated but his still not right so I am not in horsey heaven myself right now either flipping horses sorry I have not been too much help but at least you know you not alone:)
 
I am now horseless and i really don't miss it. Obviously you have a way to go with your mare, but you can always just take a break, it needn't be forever.
 
I'm sorry about your mare's diagnosis.

I said goodbye to my boy last weekend, and I was supposed to be taking a break for both time and money reasons. I feel the best I have in months without that decision looming over me, or worry that something else will happen. I am also looking forward to making headway on credit card debt with the money I'm saving. But at the same time, I'm not certain that I can walk away from horses even in the short term, although that's still the aim. I'll have to see how it pans out.

I think.. wait and see what happens and how you feel afterwards. Assuming you can meet the needs of yourself and a horse, there's no right or wrong answer.
 
I totally get how you feel. I bought the horse of my dreams after nearly 4 years of putting up with a rather nappy and incredibly stubborn connie x. Sadly a month into owning her she did her DDFT in the field and 9 months later we had to pts. My motivation and passion for horses had all but fizzled out between having a horse I didn't enjoy and then the stress of trying to rehab my mare. Looking back I honestly think I'd forgotten what it felt like to have a horse I enjoyed.

Fortunately I took on another horse shortly before I lost my mare. Without him I know I'd have quit horses when I lost her as I just wanted to crawl under a blanket and sob. Instead I forced myself to ride after work every night and threw myself into my training. Little by little I found myself feeling more and more excited about getting to the yard and seeing him, until I realised I hadn't enjoyed horses this much in years. I'm still terrified of losing him after everything I went through with my mare, but I wouldn't change things at all.
 
You cannot tell until you do it I have had horses for 55 years near enough with a few very short spells of not owning or riding them. I had a run of bad luck lame horses, dead foals and loss of grazing broke me in two but after giving them all up I only lasted about 3 months without them OH went out and bought me two foals, I was so upset and miserable to live with must have been bad as he was totally non horsey. Havent spent anytime without at least one since. Now he is quite an expert and helps with everything
 
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I have no horse at the moment and it's lonely, but I have a lot more time.
Still, I am looking forward to riding our family friends' horse next week.
Perhaps, if you really no longer want to keep horses, you could share one? You would still do the thing you love.
 
I can not imagine a life without a horse. I can not now be bothered to ride, show or do anything else really, but the simple joy of walking down the field everyday, watching them mooch and play, I could never give up.
 
I've had horses for for most of my 52 years. Two and half years ago I lost my much loved riding horse and have not ridden since. I now am chief handwalker and brusher of my daughter's retired tb and I love it. He is a beauty and very very sweet. We walk everywhere and have a great time together. I have no desire to put in the work (and sometimes heartache), required for a young horse again and get enough to satisfy my horsey needs from my retired boy. I don't think I could go cold turkey, I would probably volunteer at a RDA or something if I didn't have a horse to fuss over.
 
After a run of bad luck like that, it's completely understandable.

I went without horses for ten years, after fracturing my spine in a silly fall. I missed them, but it gave me time to get on with other things, and it was absolutely what I needed at the time.

If you decide you need a horsey fix, there are always ways to get it.
 
FestiveFuzz said:
I totally get how you feel. I bought the horse of my dreams after nearly 4 years of putting up with a rather nappy and incredibly stubborn connie x. Sadly a month into owning her she did her DDFT in the field and 9 months later we had to pts. My motivation and passion for horses had all but fizzled out between having a horse I didn't enjoy and then the stress of trying to rehab my mare. Looking back I honestly think I'd forgotten what it felt like to have a horse I enjoyed.

Fortunately I took on another horse shortly before I lost my mare. Without him I know I'd have quit horses when I lost her as I just wanted to crawl under a blanket and sob. Instead I forced myself to ride after work every night and threw myself into my training. Little by little I found myself feeling more and more excited about getting to the yard and seeing him, until I realised I hadn't enjoyed horses this much in years. I'm still terrified of losing him after everything I went through with my mare, but I wouldn't change things at all.
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Sorry to hijack but did you talk to his owner about buying him FF?
 
I've been horseless since February. I miss my old boy every day and I'd have him back in a second, however, I haven't missed riding one bit. Even when I walk my dog and riders pass me, I don't get the pang.

People are surprised at me as I'd had horses for 40+ years. Everyone is different.
 
asommerville said:
Having found myself in the position in the past 3 years where I've lost 2 horses, my mare has just been diagnosed As a head shaker and things aren't looking positive... I know at the end of the day things could be worse but the prospect of losing a other one has left me absolutely gutted - again and I'm thinking that I just can't be bothered having horses in the future....has anyone found they've lost their horsey mojo? Did you get it back? I just think I'd be better horseless and with less worry......

I know this is a totally stupid self pitying post but whenever I mention giving up I hear 'oh you wouldn't like not having a horse'! I think I would I would have money if nothing else!
Click to expand...

Yes I have been there. 5 years of bad horse related luck and not having a rideable one, bought the most recent last Aug, he had a series of issues which we spent all winter working through, thought there was light at end of the tunnel, then vet suspected head shaking, now he has come down with sarcoids. And the previous 4 years were worse! I am slowly regaining my enjoyment and having fun with the horse, though I probably won't get back to where I left off 5 years ago (competition wise)
I felt exactly the same as you.
It's ok to feel like that.
You don't have to have any more horses. You can have a break. Do other things.
All I would say is don't at any point feel you 'ought to' buy another horse, because you are a horse person , only do so if you REALLY want to!
 
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