Loss of riding confidence...help?!

sparklypickle said:
Thanks supsup, that's a lot of useful tips. The video loop is pretty much the problem. I need to get lots of positive memories inbetween it and me so I can focus on those.

Moleskins mum, oh you poor thing. That could easily have been my fate too...a broken back and leg?!! I hope you heal up soon and find something fun to do with your horse even if you don't feel like getting back on board.

Fattylumpkin (what a name!) I don't own the horse, he belongs to my friend. I don't really feel quite the degree of pressure that you describe but the current problem is that his other rider has been unable to ride for some time, leaving me to be his sole rider (though someone new is trying him out tomorrow :)) so if I don't feel up to riding him this week, I have to deal with two weeks worth of energy (or laziness..heh) next week..

Thank you very much for the encouragement.
Today I went over groomed and decided, you know what? It's extremely windy and our riding companion is dancing all over the place, so actually, you know, today, I don't want to ride. I'll be too nervous.
I think it's the first time I have done that but I think it was the right choice. Afterwards,I had my riding horse following me around the field in search of polo's and wondering what he'd done wrong (or right) that meant I hadn't boarded. Moments later a killer plastic bag attacked his companion and all hell broke lose. I collected said bag and commenced desensitisation...it took about 10 mins to go from charging to the other end of the field huffing and puffing to both of them rummaging noses into it. Glad I wasn't on board then.

Big dafties.
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Sparklypickle a wise choice! A good phrase I try to live by is 'why set yourself up to fail?' Sounds like you still had a productive day bonding and doing groundwork which will in turn help to increase your confidence.
 
Today I took my four legged buddy out hacking again. I told my riding friend about the fact that I was getting a bit nervous about if he bolted again and I couldn't stop him, she was, as always, very understanding. Someone else had ridden him a few days ago and they did walk trot and canter with no problems at all. We went at my choice of pace and I was brave enough to try a short canter which was absolutely calm and fine. We transitioned trot-canter-trot-canter-trot every time he responded impeccably like the superstar he is. I didn't push it and have another canter as I wanted to bank this nice calm memory!
I'll get a second pair of reins tomorrow because although I was totally chilled out today, who knows what next week will bring?
 
Ok, now I have some extra reins, I am thinking about which ring to put them on - this horse has a dutch gag, ridden on the big snaffle ring, but should I put the second set of reins just one down, or on the bottom ring. Bear in mind I do not intend to use these reins unless there is an emergency requiring breakage.

I am also surprised to read that you should use a leather curb strap with a dutch gag - I never knew this...can someone show me a photo where someone has this setup?

Can someone also tell me whether riding with a second set of reins on a gag is similar to how you would ride with a Pelham (It's been years since I've had to deal with two sets of reins) as I remember the hand tilting action to engage the curb, but...erm..I don't have one on this bit...
 
I would attach to the bottom ring, then before you get on, lead horse around arena and gently apply both set of reins for halt and give verbal command.
If horse happy, then pop on and ride in arena with lower rein on light contact. Again, go up and down gearbox. Horse needs to feel the lower rein coming into effect a little.
If you don't work through this, then you have no idea of how the horse will react if you really need to use it.
You may well find that he becomes uber responsive.

I'm on phone but am sure someone can post a pic, but double reins are held the same way, whatever they are attached to.
Lay the reins neatly on the neck in front of the saddle.
Pick up the top rein and sit this outside your little finger.
Then pick up the lower rein, this is held between the 3rd and little finger and is slightly more loose.
The top rein will appear to be crossed over the bottom, this is 'correct ', though some will disagree.
Top over bottom means that you will always have more leverage through your hand onto the upper part of the bit.
V glad you have been getting on better :)
 
Hello all. Time for an update! I've been steadily improving my confidence over the weeks and last week we had three very nice controlled canters which felt great. Spring has sprung though and this weekend the horses had some extra boing. On the way out everything was fine, but as we turned for home (as I'm sure you all understand) things cranked up a level. We turned onto an open bridleway and the horses were so excited and wanted to have an all-out race down it but we wouldn't let them because I wasn't ready for that. Instead we tried to get them to walk it and calm down, which involved a fair bit of jogging from my guy, and I had to turn him into the hedge a couple of time to give us a second to compose ourselves. We were doing quite well until the horses sparked off each other and my horse charged off into a fast canter. Amazingly I got him back to a trot then walk within a few strides but my heart was in my mouth and I expected the worst! The next part of the hack I was only happy to walk because my horse was working behind the bit, so I had what felt like no communication with him. Once he dropped back into contact we had a nice long trot to burn off a bit of the fizz. I'll openly admit a large part of the ride was quite terrifying for me because I have such a low opinion of my ability to ride now, whenever this horse starts to get restless I think I'm destined for the floor, but in actual fact we did ok, and by the time we got back we'd both calmed down to normal levels. Phew! I'm trying to look at this ride as a successful handling of a slightly energetic horse rather than a reason to be terrified next time I get on board. Damned spring grass!
 
WELL DONE YOU! Sometimes it takes a not so pleasant experience to make you realise you can cope with it and it's not that scary after all. While it's not nice at the time, you can look back on it with a real sense of achievement. It sounds like you're doing great so just keep plugging away.
 
Thanks for the update and well done you; you must feel a million dollars.

My first successful handling of a tricky situation post my leg mashing fall and total loss of confidence made me feel on top of the world.
 
Thanks annaagain and pansymouse :) I do feel a sense of achievement though I'm a bit apprehensive about what the next ride will bring! At least there are two other riders to take the beast out and help burn off his energy at the moment, so hopefully we will go for an adventure together not another instalment of try-to-scare-the-crap-out-of-your-rider. I did actually try humming to myself / horse to stay calm and found it really helpful - and my riding companion decided to do the same to keep her and her pony a bit less tigger-esque.

I never mentioned the rein situation - although I did purchase a second set, having not ridden with two sets since I was a teenager, I was not confident enough to try it out, just in case I made things worse in a panic situation. We are still working on the snaffle and 95% of the time that is enough.
 
This is really good to hear. I am back mobile again. I can walk and drive. My biggest accomplishment is walking a straight line. The boy and I are making friends again and I am planning lots of walks once my feet stop aching. Not surprising bearing in mind I haven't stood properly on them for 6 months.
 
I would say to pop a neck strap or breastplate on then if your feeling a bit unsteady grab hold of it before you canter, sit back and keep your lower leg slightly forward.

I've got a couple of sharp horses and I still use it when I first start them back on canter work - it's saved me a fair few times I can tell you!
 
annagain said:
You've had quite a fright so no wonder you're nervous. I'll second TFF's advice. I ride my very strong boy in a Waterford 3 ring gag for exciting things. I too knot the bottom "emergency brake" rein and just pick it up if I can sense a battle approaching - usually when we see horses up ahead.

If you have a friend with a lovely calm horse who won't set yours off, stick to hacking with her for a while, and when you're ready to try canter, just pick up the bottom rein and hold it gently, you don't need to pull it but just holding it will give you confidence that you can stop - believe me, it does! Choose the right place to canter for the first few times too - up a steep hill is best, he'll be desperate to stop by the time he's half way up!
And singing really does work! It's impossible to be nervous belting out The Sun Has Got His Hat On - you feel too silly apart from anything!
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I could have written this! Annagain saved me the effort!

Don't rush, OP. And don't add unnecessary stress to your hacks, ie. maybe give unduly windy days a miss for the moment, and stick to tried and tested routes until your confidence comes back. It will, in time.

Have fun with your old boy this summer. After his fright he'll probably appreciate the softly softly approach for a while anyway.
 
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