Making friends at a yard

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Emily thorne

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I've recently moved to a new yard. I'm 15 years old, there is a few older teens but mainly adults. Everyone is extremely friendly, and smiles and says 'hello' when walking past. However I don't feel I've made 'friends' as everyone seems so distant. I'm extremely shy, so wouldn't be comfortable going and starting a convocation with someone. Does anyone have any advise on making good friends at a new yard?
 
make a cake and put it with the yard kettle (if there is one) or somewhere people congregate.
Be brave and say hello first, can you chat to the person in the stable next to you whilst you are both working in the stables (no eye contact might make it easier). Put a note with your cake saying you are feeling a bit shy but would love someone to hackout with.
 
does the yard have a tea room? provide cookies to go with tea and be brave and make your self hang around and have a cup of tea and chat.
do you hack? perhaps try and suggest riding with someone
 
When they say hello, say hello back and ask them something about their horse, or say something nice about it- people are usually very willing to chat about their horses if you show you are interested :)
 
Making friends takes time. The ideas above are good - but don't put pressure on yourself. It will happen almost without you knowing it. Be kind yourself and others will be kind back. Take heart - you'll get there!
 
Cakes/biscuits and hacks. Try to find a couple of hacking buddies and you'll quickly make friends. However, do bear in mind that many people don't actually want to make friends at livery yards. I know it sounds bizarre, but for many people, horses are their only 'me-time' so beyond cheery hellos and how are yous they don't want much interaction. If people are being distant with you, just respect their wishes and keep being smiley and polite.
 
yes, ask if people want to go hacking out with you. The ones that also want to make friends will happily arrange a time and be thrilled to get some company.
Often if someone at the yard has tacked up at same time than me I will ask them if they want to come hacking with me, no offense taken if they say no (there are lots of reasons like lacking confidence, planning to school, going a different routes, etc...) but a good way to know them and their horse better if they say yes.
 
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