Making THAT decision

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MrsNorris

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Have just arranged for the vet to come to the house and put my 2 oldies to sleep together. Feel awful, wondering if I've made the right choice. They are 16 and 14, the old girl has anal adenomas and has started passing thin, black stools the last few days. She can't squat to poo/pee anymore and is deaf and nearly blind. Her breathing has got noisy too and she can't go for walks anymore, she spends most of the day in bed, and pants a lot even when it's cool. She pees/poos sitting down now, and gets upset when I have to clean her up afterwards. She still enjoys treats though and pottering about the house, but I don't want to wait for an emergency situation to force my hand.
The other one is her son, they've always been together. He's a total stress-head, always has been, he's aggressive and doesn't want to interact with the family, he just wants to be left alone. He is physically a bit fitter the his mum, but he has developed some more strange behaviours lately and the vet thinks it is probably dementia, so I've made the decision to let them go together. Am I doing the right thing? Vet is booked for next Wednesday, so I can easily change it or cancel, am having lots of doubts, feeling very confused and upset, any thoughts or advise gratefully received.
 
It sounds as though you are making the right decision. I really feel for you though, its never easy even when the time is so obvioulsy right-have you got family/friends etc around to support you?
 
agree with your decision after reading about your old girls symptoms,,,,,its not easy but quality of life should be uppermost in your mind and it sounds like the slightly younger one will find it very difficult when his mum goes so better to let both go together.. so sorry for you and went through similar in september and dont regret my decision but still miss my special girl everyday....hope all goes well on the day
 
My daughters will be here, we're going to spoil them rotten for the time we have left, I just hope I have the courage to go through with it calmly when the day comes, I really want to have them in my arms for those final moments, but don't know if I'll be able to keep it together, don't want to stress them out by being all upset. Am stupidly tearful even now, writing this, so god knows what I'll be like on the day. Hoping I will find the courage from somewhere when I really need it, will be gutted if I let them down at the last minute, it's so hard.
 
i found that i had cried so much before the vet came that i was able to be calm for the actual moment...i think i was almost in shock and didnt cry until the next day when it really hit me, i then had a bad couple of weeks where it would all get too much and i would be upset on all of our walks (i still had my other dog)...it has taken me six months before i could face getting another dog and i have a completely different breed as couldnt face getting another lurcher...good luck...
 
Yes you have made the right decision in the best interests of both dogs. It is always hard but it is what responsible owners do and you are a responsible owner. Ime most owners will be upset before and after the vet visit but will cope very well for the actual deed as they will but the animal's need before their own.
 
Thanks everyone, feeling a bit better about it now. I used to work at the PDSA so know the procedure, have been through it many times with other people's dogs, but it's totally different when it's your own. I'm hoping a nurse will come too as the younger one will have to be sedated first for safety reasons. I know in my head it's the right thing to do, and having confirmation on here is very reassuring.
The old girls sister was pts 6 months ago, but only after a series of fits, interventions and in hospital surrounded by strangers, I don't want that for my old lady, she's always hated the vets after having to endure a couple of major surgeries when she was young, the thought of her ending her days like that is unbearable.
 
completely the right decision for both of them. As hard as it will be, it is most certainly the kindest decision.

When my boy got PTS I somehow held it together, gave him an amazing last weekend, gentle mooch around the farm, a sausage roll and hugs on the sofa! I tried to act as normal as possible and was calm with him in my arms. He had an accident over night indoors, which he had never done, despite being riddled with cancer, and I was actually grateful as it reminded me this was time, as he would of hated messing indoors.

It's great having the vets come to you.

as soon as he was dead I cried, and my husband could not stop crying and I have regularly cried every since (he was PTS january) but I wanted to stay strong for him as he always worried when I got upset. I'm sure you will hold it together.
 
sounds like you're making the right decision. I had to do same for my old girl last month - she had severe arthritis and was struggling to get up, falling down lots and we weren't keeping on top of her pain any more. Her last day was lovely - we went to macdonalds and she had lots of food normally not allowed that she loves, went to the tarn and she got to potter in the water and round the areas she loved as well as having ice cream and lots of treats. Got to do loads more than I could normally allow then we went to the vets and they came out to the car for us.
It sounds strange but I was almost relieved afterwards - upset and crying lots obv but also relieved, she's no longer in pain and I didn't constantly have the worry about when the right time will be. We'd been away on holiday the week before and she had a lovely day and faily sure she'd decided it was time. Once she went back in the car at the tarn she just lay there and didn't really try to get up again.

Hugs - its an incredibly hard decision but sounds like the right thing
 
Absolutely the right decision, you are a kind owner to think of your dogs (particularly the younger one) rather than yourself - it will be very peaceful
 
Huge hugs to you - it is a most difficult and painful time. It is never easy :( If you make the decision about both dogs with their well-being at the forefront of your mind then you cannot be wrong. You know your dogs better than anyone. x
 
Absolutely the right decision. You'll be relieved when it's over and you don't have to worry about it anymore. They won't care either way but you'll have saved them any suffering x
 
I very rarely see such clear cut cases on here - people usually post when there is some real doubt about if they are dong the right thing. From what you've described I really don't see that there is much alternative sensible option though.

Having the vet come to you is nicer for the dogs (sadly not an option for my last as it was a quickly developing emergency situation but I've had that for other fluffies and much prefer where possible).

My only thought would be for the minor practical issues around which goes first. If they are happy being separated (ie one shut in another room) then that might be simpler if you can stand the strain for long enough to be calm for each and/or do you have another family member to be around with the second one/could the vet sedate both and then administer the drug together?!?

I mean the last few minutes don't matter much compared to the life you've given them for the last decade and a half but as they aren't going to have to be without each other there doesn't seem much point in either knowing the other has gone?
 
Absolutely the right decision, but such a tough one for you. Years ago my mother made the same decision with a mother and daughter GSD, inseparable and the younger bitch depended on the older one. Made tough day doubly so, but was the right thing to do.
 
Definitely the right decision. My mum had this dilemma recently with her two Jack Russell bitches, both 17 but one in better health than the other, she decided to let them go together despite one being in pretty good health for her age. They were out of the same Litter and had been together all of their lives so it seemed kinder to send them on their way together.
You mentioned sedating one of them and I thought my experience may be useful. When we had our old lurcher PTS I was worried about his reaction to the vet coming into the house as our dog was quite territorial so I called at the vets and collected some sedative tablets and asked them to ring me an hour before they came. They called and I gave home the tablets in a sausage roll so he was already very dopey when the vet arrived. He was so relaxed and went so calmly. I was dreading it so much, but as others have said I almost felt a sense of relief when he was gone.
 
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