Mare instantly attaching to youngster?!!

becca1305

becca1305

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My new 2 yr old arrived on sunday (still havent had chance to take any pictures!) I introduced her to all the other horses this morning in the yard and when all calm popped her out with my mare (field alpha) expecting squeals and a few hairy moments but they trotted off happily together. So after 5 mins i added one of the boys again relatively calm but mare would NOT let him come anywhere near youngster and kept herding him off! Then added other gelding and same thing happened. This continued all day. Went to bring in and the boys came in happily then got mare and filly at the same time (mum had mare) as soon as mare got in stable she kicked off and mum had to slam the door on her which upset filly as mare was whinnying her head off, luckily for an all but unhandled 2 yo she is an angel and a few stern words later she was in her stable despite mare still going ballistic. However she wouldnt settle as mare was box walking calling and sweating up! She nearly squashed me a couple of times so i had to smack her away which was awful as it wasnt her fault but the crazy fool 2 stables down calling madly at her. Mum obviously hadnt done the catch up to the stable properly and filly burst out but allowed me to catch her instantly. She initially would not budge to go back in as mare still going nuts but as soon as an apple appeared she pottered in merrily enough and I got out. Left her to calm down a little and mare stopped whinnying but was still box walking. Then went back in to change fillys rug, she was good as gold again better than the previous 2 times ive done it and only her 3rd ever rug change! :) shes such a little sweetheart it was such a shame my stupid mare upset her by insistently creating at being separated from a huge (bigger than her already!) ginger WB filly who is obviously her foal that she had forgotten shed had!! Dozy skewbald.

Sorry if that reads funny as typing on phone. But my question is has anyone ever experienced this before - brought a youngster in and a mare instantly decide it was theirs? What did you do?!! I thought Id try her again for a couple of days and remove mare to be ridden to get her used to leaving filly but if things dont improve filly will have to go in a different field with my gelding who adores her and is a big softie.

My only assumption is that she thinks its her foal as shes always been friendly to other horses but never guarded them or been this attached! My 2 yo is behaving more maturely than my (usually sensible) 7yo atm! Wahh! :o
 
Im sorry what? I didnt anticipate her acting like that? Didnt realise I should I have done? It didnt occur to me as the filly is 2.5yrs not a foaly and the mares been in with just turned 3 yos before with no issues.
 
The first time that I took my yearling away from the herd a couple of months ago, the chestnut mare (the boss) neighed for him the whole time. As she wasn't being dangerous - just noisy - I kept on bringing him in when I wanted/needed to.

I took him and the filly for a walk on Sunday and the chestnut mare grazed happily while we were gone and only neighed as we came down the driveway. She then stood calmly by the gate, waiting for them to be turned out again.

She knows that he's coming back and she's just not upset when he gets taken away now, although she's pleased to see him again. :)
 
I'm not sure that it is the age of the youngster that matters.
We introduced a rising 4 mare to an 8 yr old mare. They spent the 1st night in adjoining stables (partition wall between). Then they were put out in adjoining fields. They stood next to each other at either side of the fence for the next 2 hrs, so then I put them in together. They happened to be the only 2 in that field that day. They spent the next 20 yrs together and were almost always virtually inseparable. The older one wasn't as extreme as yours but she wasn't happy when other horses wanted to be friends with the younger one.
They were at livery at that time but when we got the next horse they were usually just in a field on their own. Then they were in a settled herd of 4 but they were always close friends.
Could you put your 2 in adjoining stables to keep the mare a bit calmer? My guess is that if she realises that the filly isn't going anywhere she will calm down.
 
Thanks guys good to know I havent done something crazily stupid :p. Im hoping she will settle. I cant really put her in the stable nxt door- smaller than id like for her & is my old laminitic boys stable which has an adjoining sand play area for him he also adores mare & i wouldnt want to upset him as i dont think hes got too long left. She could see the filly from her stable but still wasnt happy! Im also concerned that mare has a competitive job and I wouldnt want them getting more attached and making it difficult to take mare away for competing. I will try with them in same field for another few days/ a wk if their behaviour doesnt get any worse.

I agree that it may not be age related as shes been in with youngsters almost as young before, she definetely think shes hers! but i think she may well have thought the same if filly was 4 or 5. Shes not been t/o with another girlie for 2 yrs now since shes been with me maybe thats got something to do with it!

Good to know other people have had similar and its ebbed/ theyve been able to work through it :). Thanks
 
Enfys said:
How so?
Click to expand...

I don't think OP was particularly stupid so that was a bit harsh IMO but, come on Enfys, the whole attaching to needy youngsters thing is a very common issue and the OP was a bit 'green' not to have seen it coming. I think you have big herds from what I can remember but the first time I brought a mare home with not quite weanling at foot it was immediately stolen by my existing mare. Fast forward and ended up having to sell said mare as attachment just too dangerous (jumping fences etc, mare not baby). I then repeated the mistake with a loan mare who I turned out with my yearling and 2 year old and she went from being a pretty good schoolmaster to a nappy menace within less than 24 hours - couldn't get her off the yard - she went back to owners

OP I have spoken to 'professional' breeders about this issue, none of them seem to notice but honestly I'm now mega careful about who I put out with the 'babies'. Basically its the broody's and the black cob only. I wouldn't now be putting my riding horses out with anything like that.

Just my experience so not needing put down in flames (I didn't see it coming either):confused::confused:
 
I didnt really consider it as shes been out with a 3 yo before no issues. The filly is only 6 months younger. Would have thought more about it with say a yearling or obviously a foal. They seemed calmer this morn and she seems to be letting the boys nearer her havent seen any herding behaviour so far so hopefully it will calm down. If not they will have to go in different fields which is a bit of a pain but doable.

Ps the filly couldnt care less the only time she was upset was bcos the mare went crazy calling at her, she kept trying to wander off in the field and seems unbothered in general whether shes with mare or not.
 
Sorry should have said thanks for sharing scarymare and tbh I think I would have done the same the first time as you never know if there is going to be a problem or not.

Out of interest how soon did everyones attach? In the stableyard my mare was pulling faces and youngster and making sure she knew who was boss but literally within 5 seconds of putting them in the field together mare stopped 'i am boss' antics and took her under her wing so to speak. It was incredible just how fast the complete turnaround occured!
 
becca1305 said:
Sorry should have said thanks for sharing scarymare and tbh I think I would have done the same the first time as you never know if there is going to be a problem or not.

Out of interest how soon did everyones attach? In the stableyard my mare was pulling faces and youngster and making sure she knew who was boss but literally within 5 seconds of putting them in the field together mare stopped 'i am boss' antics and took her under her wing so to speak. It was incredible just how fast the complete turnaround occured!
Click to expand...

Mine was instantaneous too - both times the 'surrogate mummy mares' had a quick sort out (very limited) of the adoptee and then took on the protective role. I don't think the age of the baby matters, must just be hormones kicking in I guess.
 
Must be! My 2 yo is desperately trying to get away from surrogate mummy to try & play with the boys & greet the other lad over the fence so maybe she will manage to make the daft mare stop trying her wannabee mum act! If not will have to be separated to save filly the mothering & hopefully knock some sense into mare! :)
 
scarymare said:
I don't think OP was particularly stupid so that was a bit harsh IMO but, come on Enfys, the whole attaching to needy youngsters thing is a very common issue and the OP was a bit 'green' not to have seen it coming. Just my experience so not needing put down in flames (I didn't see it coming either):confused::confused:
Click to expand...

Well excuse me for breathing...


Harsh :confused:

by asking "How so?"

I was merely responding to this comment:

Originally Posted by Echo Bravo
Sorry but more stupid you

and wondering if the poster would enlarge on it, that's all.
I didn't even offer an opinion.

Where, precisely, did I criticise/flame/shoot down anyone?

With two words? :eek:
 
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Erm i may have got this completely wrong but I believe scarymare was directing the 'harsh' comment to the unhelpful poster who previously posted a worthless and rather mean-spirited post. The phrasing following the harsh comment may have been a little unfortunate and misinterpreted but i dont believe meant in a derogatory manner to you. And the final sentence i think was directed to anyone who may attack her stance on putting youngsters in with mares. Feel free to correct me if I am being naive and have misinterpreted!

By the by took madam mare out the field to ride. She was fidgety to groom/tack up and kept trying to jog and whinny for the first minute but soon calmed down as filly was having an enjoyable time with the boys grooming each other and didnt call back to her. She then produced a BEAutiful flatwork session :D and i took her for a cooldown hack around the block she whinnied for a minute or two but was walking calmly on a loose rein and then was a good girl all the way home not even trying to jog when she could see home and filly in the field. I popped her in the stable and got filly in before mare got upset. Mare was calling but not wound up and Filly didnt want to go in stable which didnt help but soon she was in and everyone calm. So *touch wood* the worst is over!! :) she can keep thinking the filly is her baby if she keeps producing that quality of ridden work! :D although if she doesnt stop guarding her in field I will still split them for poor filly's sake!! :)
 
My old girl instantly adopts anything that is young, old or small. She just can't help herself. She isn't nasty to anything or anyone when she has a new protege, but makes sure she puts herself between it and the other horses and is generally watchful. The novelty wears off a bit over the following days usually. I even have a photo of her "suckling" a 3 year old filly that clearly had been weaned very abruptly. She is just a kind, motherly sort of beastie.
 
Thanks fatpiggy. Im wondering if its got something to do with youngster being a girly as shes been fine with youngster colts before! Im hoping too the novelty will wear off she is still continually staring out her stable for filly though more anxious than stressed and was a pain to move back to have her rugs done but it hasnt affected her ridden work so hopefully she will chill out with the just being around her bit! Gosh! I hope my mare doesnt try to suckle filly! I think filly would have to get down on her knees to manage it! :D.
 
my gelding is like that with my 2 year old he can be taken aware from her he doesnt care but her taken away from him he either tries to climb the stable door or gallop around the field getting upset and worked up calling constantly so i have been taking the 2 year old away from him for 5 mins the 10 then 15 and so on he still stresses slightly but not as much :)
 
I know but theres always one unhelpful one ;)

Stormymoments - thanks thats what im going to try firstly leaving mare in stable after riding & filly in field as if she gets herself in a paddy i can shut top door on her until she calms down. Once shes happy with that will then start taking filly out of field to do some leadrein work and walking in and out of stable as for some reason she doesnt want to go in atm! (slowly increasing the time as you said) & leaving mare in field. Will see how it goes. Definitely calmer today than yday so its a good start :).
 
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