Mares - one person horses??

R

rafty

Well-Known Member
Joined
15 March 2012
Messages
152
Visit site
My new stressy pony has proven to be lots of hard work over the last couple of months, but at last we seemed to be making progress with napping and her being quite aggressive. Just before I went on holiday I managed to take her on a hack for an hour and a half lead reining my children and it went very well. She was calm and extremely well behaved, even standing still for each child to mount in turn:). Then she closed her eyes and was completely chilled while being brushed afterwards, the happiest she has been to date!! Was over the moon.

However, then left her at the stables (she had been at a field at mine before where we had made the good process). Then found out from a girl who was riding her while I was away that she was very difficult to ride and handle. The girl gave up in the end. I feel very guilty to of asked someone else to ride her, not that the girl was not good enough, but that it obviously stressed out my pony.:( Cannot see my pony until tomorrow and am worried how she will be, I hope she will just be relieved to see me!!

She is a mare, so it is usual for a mare to really only be a one person horse??? Has this happened to anyone else or will it pass??
 
rafty said:
My new stressy pony has proven to be lots of hard work over the last couple of months, but at last we seemed to be making progress with napping and her being quite aggressive. Just before I went on holiday I managed to take her on a hack for an hour and a half lead reining my children and it went very well. She was calm and extremely well behaved, even standing still for each child to mount in turn:). Then she closed her eyes and was completely chilled while being brushed afterwards, the happiest she has been to date!! Was over the moon.

However, then left her at the stables (she had been at a field at mine before where we had made the good process). Then found out from a girl who was riding her while I was away that she was very difficult to ride and handle. The girl gave up in the end. I feel very guilty to of asked someone else to ride her, not that the girl was not good enough, but that it obviously stressed out my pony.:( Cannot see my pony until tomorrow and am worried how she will be, I hope she will just be relieved to see me!!

She is a mare, so it is usual for a mare to really only be a one person horse??? Has this happened to anyone else or will it pass??
Click to expand...

Me and my mare have always had issues lets say. I tried to sell her, not her fault I wanted a young horse. Ive had her from 3 and shes 8 now. 10 people came to see her, no one could ride her, even professionals and my coach. She is a one person horse. Shes done her job for me so is now going in foal.
 
We have mares and yes, to a greater or lesser degree, they are usually one person horses. Ours have to put up with whatever we ask them to do but they respond better to 'their' person. It depends on the horse whether her preference shows itself when being handled or being ridden.
 
I hadn't really thought we had bonded, but now have a rush of love and protectiveness towards her!! This could change if she decides to be a complete pain in the backside towards me though:rolleyes:
 
I don't think so, my mare is anyone's to handle and I'm not a good enough rider to have conned myself into thinking it's only me who can ride her either.
So no. Not in my opinion.

As to whether they'd go beautifully for one person while go like a slob for someone else, well now that's a different matter :)
 
No, I dont think so either. Weve got a few mares and theyre anybodys really, easy for anyone to handle (apart from one doesnt really get on with OH). I think some horses can be one person horses, but I dont think its exclusively mares, or all mares in general.
 
Mine is a one person horse but possibly through my own making as after 7 years I've only just started letting others ride her. She tolerates my less than perfect riding but from anyone else, unless they are exceptional riders, she will not cooperate at all and I'm ashamed to say, will do her best to ditch them.
 
No, I dont think they are one person horse either.
Mine goes like a slob for me, but when strangers ride her she goes beautifully and makes me out a complete liar. But is not so clever when my instructor rides her.
She has manners to die for though, but is very good with both strangers and me.
 
Mmmm, I've always struggled with mares, could never get the best from them so always had boys - until last autumn I had a lovely little mare on loan and she's been an absolute delight.

Having had my boy on livery at a very busy bustling yard in the past; it was noticeable that if any of the horses there were unhappy or stressed, it was usually the mares.

So yes would be inclined to agree with OP, that in my rather limited experience of dealing with mares they do seem to like "their" person as opposed to hands-on and/or riding by a lot of different people.

Certainly, with the mare I've got; she can be a bit fussy in the mouth if she doesn't like who's riding - and according to her owner that's nothing to do with riding ability, its because she sometimes just takes a dislike to a person and seems to thrive with just one person riding & dealing with her.
 
My Mare can be handled by anyone too.

Just had a new sharer start and she has had no problems either, ground or ridden.

I think you do get 1 person Horses though, wether it be a Stallion, Mare or Gelding. Depends on the Horses personality.
 
My mare can be HANDLED by absolutely anyone but I never let anyone ride her outside of an arena - they just can't stop her. She always looked worried with someone else on top. She and I are like two sides of the same coin and have a terrific bond.
 
Haha dirtymare that sounds about right! I think mares can more often be one person horses but with that I think they direct their bad moods at you as well!

I prefer mares because of it, my gelding on loan is anybody's and will happily ditch me for new faces! He is such an attention whore!
 
My mares have tended to be one person horses, but that might be my fault!

Or maybe I am just hoping they are one person,because I would be insanely jealous otherwise :p
 
My Mare is lovely and gentle and sweet. she will let anyone ride her but definately rides better for me. she seems to not be as forward for other people but she will do what she is told.
 
BooDC and DM are spot on my mare adapts to each rider. Donkey stile for me and super event pony for rent a daughter. But she knows I love her the most!
 
In fact, Id go as far as to say, if any of mine showed signs of being one-person horses to the extent they were difficult for other riders and handlers, Id be nipping that in the bud as I wouldnt find that acceptable in my horses. The last thing I want is a friend on the floor, or a ride judge hurled up the ring, for example.
Also, if something happens to me or I cant keep the horse anymore for whatever reason Id like to know that they can go on and be ridden and handled by just about anyone and be happy, not stressing and making their lives unpleasant.
 
Yes to a certain extent, some are. Anyone can ride & handle mine. But even when a better rider than me has been on her, she spent so long pushing the boundaries that she didn't try her best, like she will for me. So not a one person horse, she's pretty much seen everything now, but when younger she was less trusting/ receptive to new experiences with other people. Daughters pony has a very strong bond with her. I can do anything with her now, but when she was still learning basic handling stuff, there was no doubt its daughter she trusted. Eg I could brush her legs & pick out her feet but she was still watchful, for want of a better word. With daughter, she was totally relaxed. And although not a nervous type, I know if she is unsure, I'd have to reassure her. Whereas just daughters presence is enough. Saying that, I think if you spend the time so they are perfectly relaxed with daily stuff, almost all should be fine for anyone to do familiar things with. Mine would hack down a mway at night with a stranger to a firework display without bother I imagine. Whereas daughters is only 5 so she's fine to do at home with anyone, but I know she wouldn't be relaxed somewhere new with a stranger, or learning something new. I think its more when you have a bond with a mare they'll go the extra mile, rather than only one person being able to do stuff. And I'd say the majority of other mares I've known fit that description.
 
yes!!! my girl is fine being handled on the ground, but put anyone other than me on her and my heart is in my mouth!! she eyeballs me on the ground, does beautiful (if unwanted) walk to canters!! bolts, bucks anything to try to get the rider off! saying that my instructer can now ride her without her objecting too much!!
 
littlelegs said:
Yes to a certain extent, some are. Anyone can ride & handle mine.

I think its more when you have a bond with a mare they'll go the extra mile, rather than only one person being able to do stuff. And I'd say the majority of other mares I've known fit that description.
Click to expand...


That is EXACTLY my experience,Ll. I think it depends on how long you've had the mare, how well you know her and how much notice you take of the nuances of her behaviour, whether you notice it or not.


Mine would hack down a mway at night with a stranger to a firework display without bother I imagine.

That also perfectly describes my mare.
 
Capriole said:
In fact, Id go as far as to say, if any of mine showed signs of being one-person horses to the extent they were difficult for other riders and handlers, Id be nipping that in the bud as I wouldnt find that acceptable in my horses. The last thing I want is a friend on the floor, or a ride judge hurled up the ring, for example.
Also, if something happens to me or I cant keep the horse anymore for whatever reason Id like to know that they can go on and be ridden and handled by just about anyone and be happy, not stressing and making their lives unpleasant.
Click to expand...

Totally agree with that, I show mine so she has to go well for others! I know I can trust her to look after whoever is on board. Wouldn't want it any other way! People always comment on how well mannered she is but imo there is no excuse for bad manners!
 
I broke my 14.1hh mare in myself when she was 3 & I was 12. We struggled through many issues for many years due to her fear of pretty much everything after starting out life in neglect. 8 years on, she is a different pony but still has lots of foibles & things she still kicks up a fuss about. She still gets moody. However, she has a good bond with my mum who has helped me look after her for 8 years.. My mum is now learning to ride her & she doesn't put a foot wrong with my mum on her back - whereas she's always on her toes for me. I would not, however, let anyone other than my mum ride her as I have no idea what she would do to them.
My 4yo 17hh mare, who I've had for 3 years, however, is placid & eager, puts her utmost into doing things right & never disappoints. The only thing with her is that I have to ASK her to do something. If I TELL her, she digs her heels in. But she's so compliant anyway so it's rarely a problem.
To me, that's the usual/general difference between horses & ponies. Horses want to please & ponies are naughty. There are always exceptions, of course.
You do have to consider their background & issues too.. Unless you've had a horse since birth, you never know what it's been through & when you'll come across something that might set it off. But that's a risk we all take with any horse.
Don't feel bad for trying to expand her horizons :) And I hope you enjoy having a special bond with her xxx
 
I think any horse can be a "one person" horse but in my experience I've found mares to be much more bonded to "their" person whereas on the whole geldings I've known tend to like anyone holding a bucket.

Though saying this, my mum's gelding is very attached to her and definitely prefers her over anyone, will adapt to his rider and is good for anyone to handle but it's so obvious that he loves her to bits - she's away atm and I'm looking after him and he's not a happy boy. He's being fine to look after but has gone off his food and is moping about looking sad and staring at the driveway waiting for her to return - he does it every time she's away and goes back to normal the second she comes home. My late gelding never noticed if I was there or not, I once went abroad for a month and when I ran across the field to my horse with open arms he couldn't have cared less!

New mare is definitely a one person horse, and it does make things tricky. I was told this when I bought her, as she'd bonded very strongly with her last rider and they warned me she might not be easy because of this. Very true! She seems to have latched on to me now and although I won't say we've bonded as it's far too soon for that, she likes me being around and does make life difficult for people when I'm not there. Can be very annoying as for things like farrier visits, I have to make sure I'm there at her head or she's horrible to him, no one else will do. Same with the vet, I have to be there or she won't let them near. If my mum (who she sees every day!) gives her her morning feed for me, she will box walk, kick the door and walls, snap at her, trash the stable (buckets everywhere!), make a horrific amount of noise and totally leave her breakfast - if I feed her, she eats it quietly, regardless of whether I'm stood watching her or not. She will let me catch her, won't let anyone else. She'll let me groom her and pick her feet out, won't let anyone else. I'm working on it because I hate to think what would happen if I was ill and unable to care for her, I don't think having a one person horse is a particularly good thing due to that aspect of it. But it is nice to feel loved I suppose...!
 
Good point re knowing them pearlsasinger. Even though mines very straightforward for anyone, she isn't affectionate with anyone else. And years ago she got attacked by a pitbull, serious enough that pts was a possibility due to the risk of infection where fist size lumps of flesh were gone. She was in shock & the vet, or anyone else couldn't get near her in a stable. I had to administer treatment & describe wounds with the vet at a distance, then the next day she would let vet in provided I stood next to him. And later, when we had the slog of getting used to dogs again, the bond was noticeable. And I think a lot of our current bond comes about from 21yrs together, its familiarity, trust & knowing each other more than being a mare.
 
She is a mare, so it is usual for a mare to really only be a one person horse??? Has this happened to anyone else or will it pass??[/QUOTE]

Mares, in my experience, are no more inclined to a one person thing than any other horse it's just that some horses are more stressed by anything new.
 
i think it would be especially difficult to have a one person horse on livery like mine are - they are on assisted diy so are bought in and out by other people at different times, the farrier comes as does them with the YO around and i or my mum cant always be there so its good in that respect i dont have to worry - but shes a very people pony loves a good scratch regardless of who is administering it!

however she does know who her mummy is!! i never have any problem with her being a bit pushy and she has neevr bitten me but her and my sister have a strange relationship! she once walked right over mysister in the field who went to catch her and can also be a it of a nusence for my sister to hack when shes as good as gold for me to ride but i wouldnt say i have any problem putting anybody on her to hack or to school just mysister doesnt like her very much :L we were also at an indoor dressage comp a few weeks ago - she went in did one test went back on the lorry came out warmed up again went into do anotehr test and she wouldnt go inside - we had the whole display bucking spinning, rearing running off - first of all the steward tryed to lead her in. having none of it. then two stewards on eitherside. still none of it. instructor. none of it. sister. none of it. mum - now she qute likes my mum and will normally be lead past scary stuff by 'nanny'. still none of it, getting slightly rediculous now - i jumped off and she walked in as quiet as a lamb :o slightly embarassing as i then had to clamber back on inside the ring with alot of people watching and i cannot get o from the floor or recieve a leg up because i always use a fence,step,gate,ramp to get on! :o
 
lottiepony said:
Totally agree with that, I show mine so she has to go well for others! I know I can trust her to look after whoever is on board. Wouldn't want it any other way! People always comment on how well mannered she is but imo there is no excuse for bad manners!
Click to expand...


Mine is only this way for jumping. Flatwork anyone confident person can have a go and shes fine to be handled by other people
 
My mare can be handled by anyone who knows what they are doing.

She rides well with anyone who can ride at my standard or above.

No she's not a one person horse. She's anyone who is capable's horse!
 
I don't think mares are any more a one person horse than any other. Mine can be ridden and handled by a number of people, and I know of plenty that thrive being handled by a number of different people, even in riding schools.

However I think that mares often build stronger bonds with people and that those bonds can take longer to establish.

I wonder if the OP's mare was stressed by leaving her old owner and was just beginning to settle and feel happy when things changed and she became unsettled again. If I were the OP I would make sure that you have a few people who are used to her and that she is used to so that you can go away and leave her without it being too stressful. Mine will have a wobble if things change, and the only times we have had problems bringing her in have been when she is being handled by someone she is less familiar with AND something has changed eg. new horse in the field or horse leaving.

Mine definitely knows who her owners are and behaves differently for different people but she copes well with being "shared" and being on livery and being handled by different staff. She will test the boundaries, and remember how far she can push though, most mares are more intelligent than your average gelding.
 
For a bit of background, she is around 15 has lived in its last stables for the past 8 years. 4 years of yet as a club horse then kept there by her new owner for the last 4 years. So it was a big shock for her to come away from all that, and she had a very strong bond with her previous owner.

I think it is partly to do with just starting to settle down, and then I wasn't there anymore. Feel really guilty about it! However, I am going to talk to the girl who was riding her to see if she would be happy to spend more time with her so she just get used to other people.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top