Meeting a rescue dog tonight!

[AmyMay]

Why do you think a second walk was a mistake?

 

[stangs]

You're not f*cking her up. She's not holding any of this against you; she's just learning to deal with her worries, as are you.

It does sound like the main issue is trigger stacking. So worth making notes - literally keeping a diary - of what the minor triggers are out on walks (the things she's not properly reactive to, but might look at a little longer, or yawn after, etc) as well as in the home (in particular, domestic life involves a lot of noise - how much of that can you reduce?) You can start to work on acclimatising her to these triggers over time, one by one. Because they're minor, dealing with them shouldn't result in her going over threshold. And, once she's comfortable with something, it then won't contribute to trigger stacking (eventually).

As you're working on addressing these triggers, plan walks that are as quiet/without triggers as possible. I'd also be doing desensitisation walks with a dog like this where possible: long lead walks in quiet locations where she chooses her pace and gets to sniff as much as she wants.

 

[ArklePig]

Why do you think a second walk was a mistake?

Just because she was an absolute angel for the entire day and fell apart after it. Too much for one day I think.

Thanks @stangs that makes a lot of sense as well. She's currently beside me behaving like she's been here her whole life and looking at me as if to say 'what's your problem' ?

 

[Pearlsacarolsinger]

You are not f-ing her up. That happened long before you got her, it's why she needed to be rehomed. One decent walk a day is enough for her to cope with, just a quick turn around the block, or playtime in the garden will do in addition. Remember she had been to a new place when she went to the secure field, that is tiring, running free is tiring, making her own decision bout whether to do as you say when running free is tiring, sniffing unfamiliar smells is tiring. A new dog is never easy but you re doing fine with her, even very experienced owners have to get to know what works with a new dog, especially a rehome, over time. Just be prepared to acknowledge, as you are, that a different approach might he better, when you see that something isn't working. All will be fine, she will settle.
Just to go back to the interfering fella, your dog does need to know that you are in charge, it will help her to feel secure. That definitely doesn't mean that you should be harsh with her but does mean that you should be consistent and firm when necessary.

 

[ArklePig]

Just to go back to the interfering fella, your dog does need to know that you are in charge, it will help her to feel secure. That definitely doesn't mean that you should be harsh with her but does mean that you should be consistent and firm when necessary.

I do agree with this, I'm trying to be very clear and consistent with boundaries so she knows what's what, but I know it's going to take time and maybe I'm not being as firm as I think? I feel like I'm not being fair on her, she really has improved a lot in just week, and logically I know there'll be steps forward and steps back it's just hard sometimes in the moment. OH must be much firmer than me as she directs the majority of her wound up behaviour at me but yet I'm the first person she comes to for a cuddle.

Alpha man also came out with such gems as 'to teach her recall you should let her off lead in the dark and she'll be so scared she won't leave your side', I was like, sir, I'm not trying to scare my dog I'm trying to foster confidence and independence. He gave me a laugh if nothing else.

 

[splashgirl45]

Dont have any different advice to offer but as am example , my whippet cross puppy 5 months old and my youngest terrier 2 years old seem to flip out for a while in the evening, they start haring in and out of the garden like maniacs, after a few mins i stop them and make them calm down, i may need to get hold of one of them to keep them still , then its all calm again. I dont know what the trigger is . so try not to get too stressed about your new girl, its early days and those sort of things happen to all of us, even if they are not rescues and the owner (me) has had dogs for all of her life ..

 

[CorvusCorax]

She has all the chews, licks, mats, etc and she just doesn't want them so I think being better prepared for before it starts is my answer here- .

On this note, I think it was Jane Donaldson who said that if you presented a crossword puzzle to a person who had no idea what it was, they wouldn't find it a very fun way to occupy their time.

It's a mistake a lot of us make in that we plop apparatus in front of a dog without ever first engaging and being part of the game.
This is especially important for dogs who may be stressed - they need to be shown things.

If you are using food as a reward or a distraction, the dog must be hungry.
I personally use the dog's own food.
I took on a dog who I'd known for six years and was well adjusted but I still spent the first few weeks feeding him by hand on walks for checking in with me to reinforce that I was 'the nice lady with the food'.
It was still a stressful time for him despite coming from one nice home to another nice home.

You're not f"ing anything up!

 

[skinnydipper]

You're not f*cking her up. She's not holding any of this against you; she's just learning to deal with her worries, as are you.

It does sound like the main issue is trigger stacking. So worth making notes - literally keeping a diary - of what the minor triggers are out on walks (the things she's not properly reactive to, but might look at a little longer, or yawn after, etc) as well as in the home (in particular, domestic life involves a lot of noise - how much of that can you reduce?) You can start to work on acclimatising her to these triggers over time, one by one. Because they're minor, dealing with them shouldn't result in her going over threshold. And, once she's comfortable with something, it then won't contribute to trigger stacking (eventually).

As you're working on addressing these triggers, plan walks that are as quiet/without triggers as possible. I'd also be doing desensitisation walks with a dog like this where possible: long lead walks in quiet locations where she chooses her pace and gets to sniff as much as she wants.

IMO the pet supermarket visit would be a trigger, not household noise, then add over arousal at the field.

 

[SaddlePsych'D]

Not sure I can offer more than has been said but just wanted to say I really relate to that fear of messing them up! It was like that in the beginning with Ivy and then again after we moved house and things started to unravel. We're back on a more positive path now and you will get there too. Your girl is lucky to have caring owners who want to learn how to help her and that have her needs in mind.

 

[stangs]

IMO the pet supermarket visit would be a trigger, not household noise, then add over arousal at the field.

One thing being a trigger doesn't mean another isn't. Of course, a supermarket visit is probably more upsetting than, say, a microwave beeping. But given that meeting triggers is often unavoidable when you take the dog outside, it's always worth knowing what's might be a trigger in the home, so you can avoid that and so minimise the likelihood of the dog going over threshold, as seems to have been the case with AP's girl yesterday evening.

 

[skinnydipper]

One thing being a trigger doesn't mean another isn't. Of course, a supermarket visit is probably more upsetting than, say, a microwave beeping. But given that meeting triggers is often unavoidable when you take the dog outside, it's always worth knowing what's might be a trigger in the home, so you can avoid that and so minimise the likelihood of the dog going over threshold, as seems to have been the case with AP's girl yesterday evening.

Unless she is going to be a service dog or do the shopping then visiting a supermarket would seem to me to be unnecessary stress.

 

[CorvusCorax]

Visiting pet shops is incredibly stressful for me because my dogs stick their heads in the pick and mix, pee on the floor and want to 'play' with the rabbits.

 

[stangs]

want to 'play' with the rabbits.

Slight tangent, but I used to know a lady who'd take her retired racing greyhound to the pet store as a treat. Apparently, it loved watching the guinea pigs because it had a 'paternal instinct'. We stopped talking when I found out she was planning on buying some guinea pigs, and keeping them free range around the house with the dog...

 

[splashgirl45]

Slight tangent, but I used to know a lady who'd take her retired racing greyhound to the pet store as a treat. Apparently, it loved watching the guinea pigs because it had a 'paternal instinct'. We stopped talking when I found out she was planning on buying some guinea pigs, and keeping them free range around the house with the dog...

OMG???. I had guinea pigs and also had a lurcher who pretty much ignored them but there is no way i would have let my pigs loose , they did go on the grass in a run but the dog was supervised all of the time and never left on her own with them outside..

 

[Pearlsacarolsinger]

Unless she is going to be a service dog or do the shopping then visiting a supermarket would seem to me to be unnecessary stress.

We do take ours to PaH, partly because the nearest branch has an integrated vets surgery and a freely available weighing scale, so it is useful to get them used to vet smells without the trauma but I would choose very carefully whether it was useful for this dog at this stage. We haven't taken the brown one there yet and don't have any immediate plans to do so.

 

[Moobli]

Try to relax. Lots of initial issues sort themselves out over time. Focus on the behaviour you want and try to ignore the rest. She sounds a lovely little dog and you aren’t going to f- her up, just take things at her speed. Try not to cram too much into such a short space of time. Get to know one another. It can feel very overwhelming bringing in a new dog or pup, but you have a whole lifetime together so try not to do too much too soon. You’re doing fine!

 

[Karran]

Deep breath! You'll be OK! Definitely agree about the trigger stacking. I had no concept of it at all before adopting Mrs Collie.
I had it explained to me as a bucket with a hole in it. Everything good or bad goes in the bucket and when the bucket overflows that's when you get unwanted behaviour - I had chasing, spinning oon the lead, screaming barks, bites that were meant to break skin and deaf-to-the-world zoomies when Mrs Collie got overwhelmed. The hole in the bucket is where it all drains out and a well bought up, well adjusted dog has a reasonably big bucket hole so it never overflows.
Our job with pups and 'new to the family' dogs is to manage what's going in the bucket and work on growing that hole.

Maybe dial everything back a notch. Just let her go for short leg stretch wee breaks up and down your road, or in the garden and teach her about sniffy games, how to use kongs and chews at home. With Mrs Collie stuff could build up and up over minutes in 'her bucket' and the come down could take ages. - for example to start with as she was so wired, just seeing a car going down the road would be enough to trigger her chase issues and we'd be spinning, screaming and lunging on the lead and then it would get worse seeing a jogger/cyclist, another dog playing offlead.

Once you've got the chilled behaviour you need at home, then start building up, quiet park walks, maybe a trip around a supermarket car park during super quiet hours so she can get used to different environments, maybe it might even be as low key as putting her in the car, giving her a treat, taking her out again, building up to having a treat while engine's running, driving around the block and coming home again. Tiny, tiny baby steps to slowly increase what she can cope with experiencing.

Take the pressure off of her and you and treat yourselves to chocolate/wine/whatever works and remember you've got this! ?

 

[Clodagh]

Supermarkets stress me out. I don’t take my dogs shopping. With SD on that. Lights, beeps, people, smells…
I had missed she did that as well.

 

[Christmascinnamoncookie]

I think treating her like she’s a puppy is right. We took ours to Pets at Home as tiny babies but we had them cuddled in then once vaccinated, they were happy to wander round. Oddly, Goose hated another pet store so was taken out, it was overload, no idea why when we were the only people in there.

Mine get their second wind after tea and there’s a lot of zooming/play fighting. On a day when they couldn’t go in the garden, Mitch was trying to crawl up my arm and nibbled me. He wouldn’t stop so was spoken to very strongly and physically removed.

If you can learn her triggers, then you can try to head her off at the pass. I find having a routine and sticking to it helps. Mitch gets very twitchy by 10.30-walk time. 5.30 and they all know it’s nearly teatime.

Yak chews and stuffed kongs are really helpful. Have a look at paddywack (I like Maltbys-Amazon) for a longer lasting chew. Keeping her entertained without overstimulating her will be key. I wouldn’t give up extra walks, that might not be the reason she had a moment.

I think we’ve all had those frustrated moments with dogs, I threaten Mitch with dropping him off to a nearby place renowned for not looking after dogs when he’s destroyed another bed. He’s going to end up on a piece of mdf like Jake! Give yourself a break, you’re doing great, you’ll get there, you’ve only had her 5 minutes!

 

[ArklePig]

Lot's to think about here. Training 'bed' is really starting to sink in today. We had a 5 min period of anxiety a few minutes ago but she didn't spiral (and neither did we internally) and then she took herself to bed. She has had one very boring walk today on the same two streets she sees every day and some play in the garden which is her favourite thing ever and she hasn't shown any anxious behaviours out there yet. We practiced some of our commands out there too. Stay is coming along nicely. It's mad to me that someone had her for a year and taught her nothing at all, it must have been horrendous for all of them.

Thanks to those of you who gave helpful suggestions. The hand line in particular is working a treat.

Here she is all tuckered out after being a very mild nuisance as opposed to the demon she has been at other times. I dunno why she sleeps with one leg hanging out, dogs get comfy in the strangest of poses.

 

[Barton Bounty]

Its still all very new and different so if will take a while to unlearn all the bad habits, dont be hard on yourself, its a learning curve for you both You are doing great

 

[skinnydipper]

Here's a couple of suggestions for things you could try at home with Fodhla for entertainment/enrichment.

Keep your boxes and paper packing when you receive parcels.

Loosely wrap a tasty chew, like a pig or rabbit ear, dried tripe, in paper and give it to her, she will enjoy tearing the paper off to get her treat. When she gets the hang of that, put the wrapped chew in a box and fold the flaps over. Give the box to her and let her get stuck in, she will be very pleased with herself when she finds her prize. You may need to help her initially.

Keep your toilet roll and kitchen roll tubes. Put some small treats inside one, make a "cracker" with paper you've saved from parcel packing. Let her smell it and then let her watch you "hide" it, in plain sight to start with. Don't make it too hard to begin with because you want her to play the game and not give up. Ask her to find it. You can play this in the house/garden. Gradually increase the difficulty, hide it in a different room or in the garden and let her use her nose to find it.

 

[misst]

Here's a couple of suggestions for things you could try at home with Fodhla for entertainment/enrichment.

Keep your boxes and paper packing when you receive parcels.

Loosely wrap a tasty chew, like a pig or rabbit ear, dried tripe, in paper and give it to her, she will enjoy tearing the paper off to get her treat. When she gets the hang of that, put the wrapped chew in a box and fold the flaps over. Give the box to her and let her get stuck in, she will be very pleased with herself when she finds her prize. You may need to help her initially.

Keep your toilet roll and kitchen roll tubes. Put some small treats inside one, make a "cracker" with paper you've saved from parcel packing. Let her smell it and then let her watch you "hide" it, in plain sight to start with. Don't make it too hard to begin with because you want her to play the game and not give up. Ask her to find it. You can play this in the house/garden. Gradually increase the difficulty, hide it in a different room or in the garden and let her use her nose to find it.

I'm going to try this with my 2 terriers when Ruby is fully well. I think they would really enjoy this. (And so will I)

 

[ArklePig]

Thanks SD, lots of ideas there. We have been hiding but I hadn't thought of making things increasingly difficult so that's a great idea.

She is officially in bed and I can proudly announce that there has been no toileting in the house today and there has also been one half hearted attempt at a hump to which a stern OFF was issued and she just took herself off to play with a chew instead. Progress.

 

[ArklePig]

Butter wouldn't melt. She's been with oh all day but she's been sleeping on me since I got home from work. We haven't had any more toileting inside and I haven't been humped since Sunday evening and that was only a token attempt really. She seems much happier and relaxed, it's really coming together. Look at this wee face ?

 

[Christmascinnamoncookie]

Butter wouldn't melt. She's been with oh all day but she's been sleeping on me since I got home from work. We haven't had any more toileting inside and I haven't been humped since Sunday evening and that was only a token attempt really. She seems much happier and relaxed, it's really coming together. Look at this wee face ?

Extra cute! ?

 

[ArklePig]

I don't suppose anyone can recommend a good cordless hoover, am sick of lugging out Henry ?

 

[Pearlsacarolsinger]

I like our VAX Pet cordless and it copes with dog hair, as well as anything else does

 

[ArklePig]

Thank you I will have a look! Navy sofa plus mostly white dog is rough going! ?

 

[Barton Bounty]

I don't suppose anyone can recommend a good cordless hoover, am sick of lugging out Henry ?

Shark pet hoover, cordless , it’s amazing