Mini-rant

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Flicker

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Friendly with a very nice lady at our yard, whose daughters each have a horse of their own. She rides eldest daughter's horse occasionally and keeps a hand in wherever she can.
Anyway, eldest daughter has just passed test and has been given a car.
However, nice lady friend of mine keeps texting me to ask me if I could 'just chuck a load of hay in' or 'just chuck a feed in' to eldest daughter's horse!
Youngest daughter's is on full livery so yard take care of it. YO not keen on eldest daughter.
This happens at least once every couple of weeks, sometimes once a week.
They also leave a feed and hay outside the stable which I put in every morning for them so eldest daughter only needs to come up later.
When eldest daughter didn't drive, I had no problem with doing this, but now the lazy little so and so has her own car, and they are still asking me to do things. Might add that eldest daughter doesn't work either.
I have tried asking 'can xxx (eldest daughter) not come up then?' and she's said things like 'no, she's going out'...
Don't want to fall out with her because she's really nice and a friend, but I'm starting to feel taken advantage of a bit.
Might add, eldest daughter barely even acknowledges me on the yard on the occasions that she is there.
I guess I should stand up for myself more, but don't want to see the horse go without, which he would if I put my foot down.
Oh dear, I guess I'm just a bit irritable because I've just had another text...
 
I'd stop doing anything with the horse and have a word with YO if you're not happy to do it. Surely she wouldn't leave horse all day without anything if you stopped doing it.
 
I totall agree with random_rach, you need to stop, it does sound like the daughter is taking the pee.

If you cant think of anything to say to them, make stuff up, like your phone is playing up or you wont be at the yard - & if they are there when you are just say your plans changed and you managed to pop down.

If worst comes to worst and they ask you to do something & you 'dont get the message' or whatever, evil as it sounds a horse left without hay for a short period of time will not kill it, yes it may get distressed but then the problem will be noticed by others & the YO. this is not your fault, it is hers. This horse is not your responsibilty.

Sorry, i do think you need to be a little selfish, she is taking the pee.

i have seen this before on DIY yards & i have also seen this situation get out of hand. im not saying it will but the girl does need to know that she has responsibilities.

i totally sympathise with you and understand how hard this could be.
Sorry to be honest.
 
No you are both absolutely right and everyone else on the yard tells me I'm a mug for doing it. Mum (my friend) has offered to help with my boy if I need anything, but:
a) I do it all myself because I like to;
b) mum not there regularly enough to make it worth while asking.

Right, next time I will just ignore my text and say I left the phone next to my bed!
 
Dont say that you are a mug.... because you are not, you just are a caring horse owner
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The girl needs to learn & you need to spend the time at the yard, enjoying your horse not worrying about anyone elses!

Plus it could be fun, see how elaborate & random the little white lies can get before they get the hint!

If they do get in a strop they need to grow up & im sure will get over it soon enough!
 
Try replying with yes I'll do this tonight if the daughter can do hers and mine tomorrow morning.

Say this every time and she'll soon get the message that she needs to be fair and offer a swap.

You could ask your YO to check that the girl actually does it and your horse gets its feed.

If she still doesn't pull her weight have a quiet word with the mother, say that when she didn't have transport you had every sympathy, but now she has transport and no work comitments she actually has more time for her horse than you have for yours so you think she should pull her weight more. Say you are happy to help out but it should be a fair exchange.

Why do they have one horse on full and the other on DIY? Sounds odd!
 
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This is just wrong. Turn your phone off or say you have other plans and can't help.

[/ QUOTE ]

Then text her to see if she can do your horse so you can go clubbing LOL
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Random Rach is rights, now she has her own car you start takeing time out, ask her to feed your horse. But the others are right you are going to have to put your hoof down and say now she is mobile she can do her own work.If you wimp out, you are going to be doing work for them free of charge until she has a boyfriend and the horse is sold and then there is daughter number 2 growing up!
 
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