Minor rant - I need to do this, please feel free to ignore!!

Been in the same sort of position as you except the little girl lived just around the corner and was a sweetie. I had a really nice smaller NF that was just wasted as I was too big for him at the time and I wanted him to be doing something. I taught her to ride properly on one of my oldies and she turned into a really nice little rider. She would normally come out to the ponies with me 3-4 times a week and more in the summer, I took her to lots of shows with dinky NF and she started winning alot of classes.
After 18 months of completely free riding, tuition and show entries her mother decided that it was her daughter doing me the greater favour and demanded payment in return for her riding my pony. The arrangement was stopped there and then on my doorstep.
 
Been in the same sort of position as you except the little girl lived just around the corner and was a sweetie. I had a really nice smaller NF that was just wasted as I was too big for him at the time and I wanted him to be doing something. I taught her to ride properly on one of my oldies and she turned into a really nice little rider. She would normally come out to the ponies with me 3-4 times a week and more in the summer, I took her to lots of shows with dinky NF and she started winning alot of classes.
After 18 months of completely free riding, tuition and show entries her mother decided that it was her daughter doing me the greater favour and demanded payment in return for her riding my pony. The arrangement was stopped there and then on my doorstep.

That's so sad! I bet the little girl was loving it - dream come true! (Unless of course, we're only hearing half the story and you were actually a tyrant who dragged her out of bed at 5am and whipped her with a showcane if she wasn't placed ;))<joke>.

I have a friend's daughter come up and ride my mare sometimes. I don't expect anything in return as it's so infrequent and is more just because I like to see someone else enjoying her. But she always tries to help while she's there - holding haynets open, carrying feeds, etc.

I'm also one of those who would have killed for a chance like the OP is giving this girl. I used to spend hours scrubbing feed buckets when I was 8 for an extra little ride. Even when I was about 20ish and was exercising some horses for a nearby small RS I still insisted on being left a stable or two to do or some tack cleaning! I don't consider myself good enough for my riding alone to ever be a favour for anyone else.
 
I think a chat with mum is required.

Spell out that as a child you wanted a pony and had people that were happy to let you help with theirs and that you wanted to do the same for other children in the same position you were in.

Say its not working for you any longer, as you feel that either the child lacks the commitment or the time and that having access to a pony is not just about riding, its about putting in the groundwork and doing the care. Offer them a chance to belay your doubts through the holiday, based upon certain guidelines being met (come up with some that you think are reasonable, ie poo pick, groom, clean tack before the child rides not after).
If this doesn't work for them then no hard feelings but you'd rather not go to the effort if it isn't appreciated, as you don't feel the child fully understands what having a pony is about.
 
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