MMMmmm not sure if I'm cross or not..

H

henryhorn

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www.narramorehorses.blogspot.com
CCJ has just confessed back in the summer she was offered a large sum of money for one of her youg horses by an event rider (shall be nameless).
Now on paper the horse belongs to us, and it would have been nice to have had the choice at least, but she kept quiet thinking we might have accepted the offer. My husband and I talked it over today and decided we wouldn't have done, but was she right to keep quiet?
I can see her point, she gets a horse that she thinks may take her further eventing than anything we've had before, but I think we should have all sat down and at least discussed the offer..
I think I'll settle for next time (if ever there is a next time!) we should be told...
 
Yes, definetely make sure she tells u next time!!! The horse may get u further in eventing but u may not have the money to do it!!! swings and rounabouts but she needs to understand that a living needs to be made at times!!! (sorry a bit grumpy, but I had to sell a very good youngster I had, but did have extra money to by the next 2 then, which our turning out even better and still money left!!!)
 
Who pays the bills HH?

She should have told you......
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I think she ought to have told you, after all you are the horses owner. Yes she would have been disappointed if you had sold the horse but whilst she is riding for owners (and that includes you) it is one of the risks. At the end of the day it is all part of learning and growing up. When the horses are hers, bought and paid for by herself then she is free to call the shots IMO.

Can understand why she didnt tell you but that does not mean I think it is right.
 
I would want to be told as the owner , but also see the other side too.
Im with you on this- ie I dont know whether I would be cross or not.
no help to you but i would want to know more detail before making a real answer
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TBH I think she should have told you. As it stands, it is your horse you have the right to know. As it has been said, I can understand why she didn't tell you, but it doesn't make it right.
 
I would be cross. Eventing and running costs are high and perhaps this could have made a big difference to you..... I'm afraid I get really cross about people making decisions for me or taking my choices away but then perhaps I am a control freak
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Exactly the same as ISZ am afraid. I make the conscious decision not to accept help from anyone financially with MY horse so he is exactly that, and I can legitimately make the decision should that offer be made. If I am purely the rider, the decision is down to the owner and only the owner. This is something you acceot if you take the ride on someone elses horse. That is why so many top riders make sure they have a certain % of the horses ownership under their belt so they have some control of what goes on. If you havent got the ownership, you have no control
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She probably should have done, however I had an offer once, horse came out of the SJ at the end of a 3 day and got a large sum offered there and then. I was 19 at the time, and couldnt actually face the thought of my horse (although legally bought/owned by my parents) being sold, even when my parents tried to explain it was a deposit on a house it didnt register. Not sure how old CCJ is, but I think when you dont know about things later in life, selling a horse for a large sum is not something which you think about as being significant.

Personally I felt proud that I got asked, and that to me was like being paid that sum of money itself! My parents were great about it, and understood my reaons

Having said that if I knew that house prices would go up so much, i probably may have thought differently!!
 
My horses are bought, paid for, financed and looked after by me, but I still told my OH when I was offered a lot of money for one of them a couple of years ago - thank goodness he said I wouldn't be able to replace the horse if I sold it, so what was the point in considering it. Don't think I could have lived with myself if I hadn't discussed it with him though.

I suspect that is why CCJ has now owned up! I would be like you, a bit annoyed, but no point getting cross at this stage. I would make it clear that if it happened again though, I would expect to be told. (Nice to know someone else rates your horse though, isn't it?!
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I think I would be annoyed as sometimes the bigger long term picture is not taken into account. For instance that money could have purchased another equally nice horse plus paid for top level competing and lessons.

At least if it was discussed everyone could have had an imput. But I guess you feel most disappointed in that CCJ did not trust you enough to discuss it. After all your family more than most works as a team with you doing much of the donkey work and her father helping in bringing on the babies.
 
Well, at least she told you in the end - she could have kept quiet altogether. No point getting cross at this stage but a reminder that you'd like to be told of any offers in the future is in order. How exciting by the way that a 'name' is prepared to pay a large sum of money for one of your horse!
 
I think you should of been told at the time, and then you could of chatted it through together.
There is nothing you can do now, so just tell her that you need to know if anything comes up again! Straight away!
 
I think she should have discussed it with you as it was your horse but I can quite understand why she didn't. I expect if a similar situation arose now she would talk to you - she's shown quite a bit of maturity by telling you about the offer now and there's no reason to think she'll not do the right thing next time.
PS Obviously quite a different situation if it had been her own horse
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I think yes she should of told you, but dont forget, she is only a 'young' person and might not of felt confident enough to give a good persausive argument for keeping this horse. If the horse does take her on to higher levels, then it is potentially a good investment as she will gain experience to help produce more horses to a higher level, that kind of experience is invaluable. BTW HH have you explored the option of CCJ going to work somewhere else for a spell, I have seen this be the making of many a good rider. Maybe you should discuss some scenerios of what if's with the horses in order to give her a better understanding of the implications of keeping the ones that should be sold.
Poor CCJ I hope she doesnt feel too bad.
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She's been working her socks off all day including riding four horses so hasn't seen this as yet..
I've calmed down now but was pretty fed up earlier, at least she owned up in the end, the horses are sort of owned by all of us so we would never just have said take the offer without taking her feelings into consideration first. (well her Dad would he hates the horse!!)
Now it's thrown me with another problem, nothing is insured and I won't insure apart from PL, and it's bound to lame/kill itself being worth more money!
The worst thing is we had a conversation last night regarding what horses were selling for and the little monkey never said a thing. I suppose the guilt kicked in today hence the confession.
I tend to feel nothing is worth anything until the buyer actually puts the money in your hand, years ago we were offered stupid money for our old stallion, and we said no, so we could hardly expect her to be any different.
It may be a good bargaining tool to persuade her to tidy her bedroom occasionally, so I'm going to keep the offer as ammunition.
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Her plans for 2008 include going off to work on a couple of event yards, she's just got a new trainer who she really rates, so she may go to her for a while, at the moment we are too busy building the new yard, taking horses in for breaking and training etc to go away for any length of time, but it's in the plan..
 
Evening, I would be pretty unhappy about it, but most of all I would wonder why she decided to land herself in the poo and tell you now!!! She could have just kept quiet and no one would ever have known...!

BTW, that 'big' contract that same in by phone when you were in the shop has been confirmed in person today, excellent news, fab end to our first year!
 
Sounds like a good plan, and yes I totally agree about the value thing, but business is business (unless you have cultivated a money tree???) and she must understand that there are downsides to the fantastic job she has. At the risk of sounding ancient, I would have given my arm for opportunity like the one she has, (not as past it and over the hill as I sound honest!
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If it helps you make a decision on the insurance front, my old dog never had a days illness in his life until I got him insured and in the past 3 years he has cost Tesco about £4.5k!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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That is one phone call I have thanked my lucky stars for ever since!
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