More help needed please. Seperation Anxiety

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Louby

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I posted a while ago about my new puppy who had us up through out the night. We tried to leave him but for the sake of my neighbours we did have to give in at times as he howled for almost an hour. Things have improved and we have had til 7am most mornings which has been such a relief. My problem now is leaving him, he cries, barks and howls even if I just nip to the loo and its really starting to get us down. Weve tried leaving him for short periods but he just wont have it. mY neighbours texted me yesterday asking what I'd done to him as he was so bad. We had nipped to the supermarket and was gone for only 3/4 hour. What should we do? Hes in a crate at night and also when we leave him. I bought a baby gate last week in desperation to see if leaving him in the kitchen would help but my husband shut it to go to the loo and he was howling straight away. We are beginning to loathe life with him arround as we feel like prisoners. I know that sounds awful but its really how we feel
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I am in the same suituation! I have just got a rescue dog and he can not be left alone he has to have human company. Its a nightmare as I have to work!! At the moment he goes to my partners mums when I work, but I need to leave him at some point but so far cant! I have invested in a extra large crate, and have got him used to this while I am there and he is fine, but as soon as I leave the house he escapes! He did this three times in a row even when I tied it shut! Then once he is out he attacked the cat flap, jumps up at the door on the work surfaces anything to try and get out. He also barks and barks and crys. He also sleeps in my bedroom, my dog has to be with humans even in the same room, and yes he even come to the loo. He will go in the garden on his own but he wont go out there long before he comes to check where I am.

I need help too! I have just ordered a comfort zone DAP defusier that you plug in and it realises a smell to help calm him. I also tried yesterday going out the front door and then walking round the house and going through the back door, this confused him and he didn't know which door to attack to get out. He wasn't to bad but I was in and out the house quick, so may keep trying this and buid it up to 1 min out of the house to 2 mins etc. Next week end I am borrowing a friends dog to see if he is a bit happier with him on his own with another dog???? I dont want to go and get another dog if it doesn't work, so will try it out with a friends dog first. If it does help, I will get another but I wont hold my breath.

Also read this link
http://www.wagntrain.com/SeparationAnx.htm

Its so frustrating, I have the most fantasic dog, but a massive problem. He is also young (9 months old) so hopefully he is trainable to sort this problem out, but I wont give up on him.

Any good advice you get and anything that works for you please let me know and I will do the same for you!

Good luck!!!
 
Hi, thanks for replying. Weve tried fussing him and semi ignoring him as if to not make a big deal of us coming and going. He is very clingy but apart from leaving him alone is really well behaved. Hes only 13 1/2 wks old and we really want it all to work out.
 
Hiya, thanks for replying and for the link.
Its awful isnt it, I feel so cruel leaving him howling but then at times Im beginning to resent him
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. He spends part of the day with his brother and sister whilst I work and this I think is my main problem as I then bring him home on his own. I dont want another dog, our house just isnt big enough and hes going to be a big boy but I reckon it could help you. I thought he would have a lovely life and wouldnt have got a dog to leave it alone whilst I was at work, I thought he would have the best of both worlds but things just arent working at the moment. Im going to have a look at the DAP thingys. Its got to be worth a try. Its funny how you mention the doors. My boy knows we are going out when we use the front door but doesnt seem fazed when we walk out of the back door. Maybe thats worth a try too.
Please let me know if you have any success. Good luck
 
U say u are leavign him in the crate when out and at night....do u leave him in it when u are in the house at all?
and when u place him in the crate at night....does he go any length of time at all when u leave him to go to bed?
 
It can be done believe me...we have a total of 42 dogs crate trained(not in the same home) lol
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at the moment and each and every single rescue we have and get in is fully crate trained before rehoming, it can be frustrating at first but with patience and a good routine it can be done pretty quickly.
 
Thanks Cala, at the moment his crate is half bed half paper as without the paper he dirtys his bed. He is still a baby and Ive been told he will be about 18 weeks old before he can hol himself for any length of time. He does go outside 99% of the time for the loo though. His crate is left open until we go out or go to bed but its that big the only place I can fit it means he cant see us so I put a vet bed in front of the fire so he can feel part of us as he was walking backwards and forwards from the crate or sleeping on the laminate floor near the fire. As hes a Lurcher hes sort of bony and his elbows were starting to go bald hence the vet bed. I realise this probably wasnt a good idea. We put him to bed about 20 mins before we go and hes been fine for the last week or so. We try to do the same if we are going out anywhere. I feel awful locking him in as he knows we are going somewhere and gets upset. Im a right softy I know.
 
Right...first things first...do not feel bad about leaving him in the crate...the alternative is...things could get so bad u would have to think about rehoming him...so...what is better...that u keep him and he has a lovely home for life? or that he could potentially end up anywhere with people who are not as patient as u.

We rehome a large percentage of dogs because of crying and destruction, so the first thing we do is try and give as much advice to those who want it and those who don't we take the dogs crate train and rehome with a crate.

If it makes it any easier could u sell the big crate and down size it for 2 smaller ones...will explain.
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It's a good idea and worth u trying a dog as company...if he is a rescue then he may well have been with other dogs in his previous homes...we have had 1 dog in all the hundreds that we have homed that was able to destroy even the strongest of our cages, she was a pitbull x whippet and built like an outhouse
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...yet when left with another dog crate or not, she was fine, no noise, mess or destruction...so I defo think she was used to other k9 company.....so worth a try in your predicament.
 
Thanks for your advice, I really really appreciate and need it
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We do not want another dog, to be honest we love him to bits but realise it wasnt the brightest idea we had. We have a tiny garden, small semi but loads of fields, bridleways on the doorstep and we thought his life at the farm and here at home with us would be bliss, we just didnt realise. That sounds really bad I know but if only we could leave him alone. Its not like we want to leave him for hours, that would never happen, just 1 or 2 to do the shopping, nip to the pub or garden centre. Please dont think bad of us, we just didnt realise how hard all this was going to be.
He is going to be a big dog so I bought a 48 inch crate. He fills over half of it now
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Why should I get two, cos I will if it makes things better for him. Should we ditch the vet bed? What about the half bed, half paper? We are willing to try anything as he is a lovely boy.
Sorry for all the questions and thanks so much for helping us.
 
I dont think u need to get another dog, so dont worry about that was just suggesting that for the adult rescue in the other users thread...your dog is still a baby and will get used to be alone for periods of time, the other dog may have had adult company all of it's life befor landing with jenny.

Have Pm'd u a rather long message to help u out with the crate training, the crate down size is explained in there..lol
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I usually try to make a crate as small as possible...try placing a plastic bed in it to take up more space, sometimes the passing faeces can be anxiety and this will cease in time as he gets used to it, so would not worry about that for now.
A smaller space creates a feeling a security and actaully helps them settle far quicker than a larger one.
I usually replace with a bigger one for a more space once trained.

I do not think bad of you at all...u are trying your best and crying out for help, u are not just giving up at the first hurdle...that is dedication and good ownership, and your puppy is very lucky.
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When you want to go out, place him in the crate 10 minutes before you go. And 20 minutes prior to that ignore him. I'd say "Im going out, in your crate" in a very matter of fact voice. Put him in, get ready and go out for 1 minute. Come back in and ignore him for 5 minutes totally - do not look at him at all. Open the crate and ignore him until he calms down. Call him over when he is quiet and quietly greet him. Don't over enthuse the leavings or greetings. If he is excitable, you need to be very calm. When he can do this without creating, you can extend to 2 minutes then 5 minutes, 10,15,20 and on upto an hour. Im sure cala has given you plenty of help, this is just what I would do and do do with my part kenneled dogs. And you must be consistant, even when he accepts it. dogs like routine.
 
Awww thanks everyone. Today has been a bit of a turning point ... feelings wise, its wierd Ive sort of fallen for him, all of a sudden. Hes been really hard work, much more than I ever imagined but I can hand on heart say I love him now, yesterday I was desperate!!
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