Most numpty thing you have done in competition

Haha - Glad to see I'm not the only numpty out there...

My faux paus include being well in contention of a pretty high placing at a national final (which we travelled 8hrs to get to) and after jumping a superb round trotting merrily out of the arena to hear the commentator say "and thats an unfortunate elimination for not going through the finish line" Grrr!!

Have forgotten bridles/bits/boots etc on numerous (although have heard someone forgot their horse before?!!)

Have been dumped in the water jump right after the horse before me kindly relieved itself on its way through!!

Oh and forgot my jodphurs at an SJ comp once.. had to compete in my "jeggings" oh dear me...
 
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WOW! Some brilliant ones in here!

I think we should all print it off and keep in our lorries/trailers for when we have a crappy day. If nothing else we'll realise that we've all been there!
 
Jumped a big spread in a sj course backwards - I was in the lead afetr dressage too! Pony going way too fast and locked on - eeek. Only realised when I had to do a huge detour to find the next fence

Oh and pony wouldn't get out of the water at a HT. I could hear "Competitior number ?? is STILL in the water" about 4 people over took!
 
I fell off twice once at a show jumping competition. Although different rounds. The second time after been flung in between the spread. yet again. I sliced my finger open and gave up. lool. I think the commentator thought i was a complete failure. First time i jumped back on and completed it fine, but second time i had had enough :P
Have also fallen off in the warm up arena. that was embarassing, was my 2nd BS as well. lol.
 
langside said:
Must be something to do with Tetrathlon in a different country - my experience in Ireland for regionals was horse and rider enter the start box horse leaves box rider is left on the floor ;)



We have some corkers in this thread :D amazing to think that some of us have survived this long me included ;) :p
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I think it's just tetrathlon in general, I have missed fences out about 7 times doing these but never eventing!

We had a similar thing happen at Areas one year with my brother, having stabled on site metres form the XC pony threw him off at the start and legged it back to the stables to see her friends!
 
These are just brilliant!! They have brightened up my rather rubbish day!!

Will contribute a few of mine:
reading dressage test for trainer-down centre line track left so of course he tracks right! I stopped reading waiting for the judges to ring the bell but they didn't and as he vaguely knew the test carried on doing medium trot and a serpentine giving me serious evils for not reading, it wasn't until he got to C to halt and rein back that the judge said "oh, you're facing the wrong way"!

Reading a test for him again, outside at Aston in the wind and I was standing at B with all specatators behind me. Shouting my lungs off in the wind so he could hear me and at one point during the test shouted back at me"you need to shout louder I can't f*****g hear you!" At end of test and 2 errors of course later I walked back sheepishly past about 20 spectators

In my first ever BE knowing my horse would nap I set off out of the start box at full pelt when without warning half way to the first fence she stopped dead and I didn't! Managed to keep hold of the baggage and not knowing the rules wasn't sure if I was allowed to remount so just stood there holding the horse like a complete lemon! Jump judges were sat in the car in the warm and did nothing, and it wasn't until someone shouted "do you want a leg up?" that I realised re-mounting was an option. So in my jump saddle with xc length stirrups on my 17hh horse I very un-elegantly scrambled back on and disappeared over fence 1. Highly embarrassing but managed to come home with only 2 time pens-no idea how!!

A non competition one, xc schooling at Aston trainer had me flying over the Intermediate and a few Advanced fences so I was feeling very proud of myself!! However he was repeatedly shouting "sit on your bum" at me as having previously been a sjer I had a tendancy to be a little infront of her. Then he wanted me to pop the 2ft log into the water going back into where the lorry park usually is (it is more like a puddle) at which point I was far too cocky, didn't sit on my bum and was promptly deposited in said puddle. Of course I received no sympathy and had to get on and continue with the schooling and go home in the horse part of the lorry because I stank so much!! Needless to say I have now learnt to sit on my backside!
 
HotToTrot said:
Ok. My first BE with my 5 yr old after several horseless years:

1. Horse had a tantrum and broke headollar before we left, so I mended with a bit of string.

2. Took wrong turn into event. Drove onto XC course. XC was held whilst I turned round and drove out.

3. Went to get number to find mine had been given to someone else. Was told to look out for mine and was given substitute.

4. Saw my number warming up in DR. Politely enquired as to whether it was mine (see point 3), received v cantankerous reply.

5. Went in to SJ, commentator announced rather shirtily that I was wearing worng number, please rectify (see point 3).

6. Horse at annoying babyish "I won't be left" stage. Was on own so had to take horse with me everywhere I went, on bit of string, like gypsy pony (see point 1).

7. Horse booted me when taking out studs. V painful.

8. Tried to leave, lorry wouldn't work.

9. No reception on phone. Hopped (see point 7) to tractor. Left gyppo-bit-of-string-horse (see point 1) with a stranger to hold (see point 6) . Hitched lift to top of hill. Called AA.

10. Received dressing down for driving in wrong entrance (see point 2).

11. Lorry fixed by AA in a hotwiring fashion. Could not switch off ignition for fear of being unable to re-hotwire.

12. Got home, realised had lost bridle.
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I havent read further down this thread yet but thats blooming hillarious!!!!!!

Sorry to laugh at your day but it was veryvery funny

x
 
Once had 14 refusals in a hunter trials (in my defence it was the pony's first one, and the 'novice' was about 1m) - thankfully said pony did improve eventually.

Have also forgotten horses girth and boots at various events but having a lorry means we can carry spares for stuff now.

I really love this thread - has really cheered me up.

Fiona
 
RoLu19 said:
Have forgotten bridles/bits/boots etc on numerous (although have heard someone forgot their horse before?!!)
Yes well MANY years ago we used to have a big old lorry and various small ponies.... going to one particular show we only had one pony doing BSJA and he happened to be the smallest one of the lot (11.3hh bless!)...
So we get to the show let down the ramp and mum say's "oh I thought he was travelling a bit quiet"...


Yes he was indeed back home in the stable :o:o
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i think we can safely conclude from this that we have all been there! doesnt make it any easier to take tho.

think i hav pretty much done it all...
turned up on the wrong day, plaited, driven an hour etc to find out the comp was the day before
went through finishing gates instead of starting gates so eliminated
went before the bell
jumped wrong course
forgot dressage test
horse broke bridle running off in snow
fell off at 1st fence
refused and eliminiated at 1st fence in BSJA 2nd round

sure there are others and numerous falls along the way
 
Not realised it was 2-phase, so went in blissfully unaware that there was a jump off course (as noone I'd seen go round had gone clear) and then when I got told to carry on just made up a little jump off course :o I was right for, oh, about 3 fences, then got E'ed :p
Only time Bronson ever got eliminated, purely by my numptyness! Argueably though, it didn't say anywhere that it was 2 phase.
 
About 3 years ago was at skipton intro with my old ex-racehorse - did well (for him) dressage, had last fence down showjumping. Set off xc very confidently. Commentator (scottish) said 'next starter is......, oh she must be good, she's scottish!' horse set off like his tail was on fire, flew fence 1 and 2, came into 3 very confidently, then saw the straw bales underneath and slammed the brakes on at the last second. I sailed over his head and landed on my feet in front of fence! Thing was when i walked it i thought he would have a look at them - why didn't i kick on?!?!?

Also recently, on new horse, did a lovely clear sj (my nemesis) to be told i'd missed out a fence! To add insult to injury we had fastest time by miles (as i event and normally try to avoid sj at all costs i forget to ride against clock in jo, but really went for it this time).

Also on new horse, was doing dressage - his best phase. I went wrong twice in test (never done this before, alzheimers setting in?!). At end of test said 'i i can't believe i've done that' to judge. She said i'd be kicking myself. Thought that meant i'd be last. Shocked to find i'd still won by 10%!!
 
And a few more (:p) :
- Dressaging at my first ever ODE, was warming up okay, then the air ambulance came so had to stop warming up, Bronts switched off and went 'why do I have do this again?' so went in and did a god awful test including 'counter canter' :rolleyes: on top of the arena boards... Then had to tell the steward I'd broken one of the boards in half and it was in the arena before they could let the next one go...
- That was followed by a nice clear SJ, set of really well XC, ground to a halt in the middle of a field (nowhere near a jump!) as he could smell pigs. Stood there kicking for quite a while, till we got overtaken, then he decided that he'd carry on, and finished off clear :o
- Getting off Bronson after retiring from yet another god awful dressage test becuase he felt a bit odd and I was so mad with him. He proceeded to spin round and kick me, before trying to escape :mad:
- Doing PC dengie first rounds, didn't ride past the judges car for some reason :confused: so had the judge get out and wave me over :o then after the test she got out again, and said "Did you go across both the short diagonals in your walk?" - turned out FWLR was down the long side, which I thought when learning the test, then though 'surely that can't be right; the judge won't see them stretch down', always trust the first thought!
- SJ when a few of my cousins and my aunt & uncle had come to watch aswell, brill clear in the first round, went to do the jump off, over first and second, went to turn left and Bronson napped round to the right - which he NEVER did - turned out I was going to go the wrong way! Carried on Bronson's way and went clear, but very slowly. Clever pony though!
 
1) Walking into the ring, my horse spooked and spun around and I hit the deck, she then used my leg as a platform to gallop off. But as it was before the bell had gone they let me go back in at the end of the class :D and we came second ;)

2) Hickstead last year, horse stopped at the hedge and I fell off and landed right in the middle of it! Like it was a seat put there just for me to watch my horse look at me in total confusion :P

3) Forgetting the course. That's very embarrassing. Especially when it's the jump off so there's hardly any to remember in the first place!
 
Brilliant thread, has made me LOL on more than one occassion :D
Am definately printing this out and putting in the lorry for next comp, and thanks guys sharing what went wrong has made me feel no quite so bad about Wednesday :)
 
TableDancer said:
4) At Windsor 3 Day one year, attempting to jump the slow route of a double of corners late on the course, in fact second last fence - slow route as I had realised I had little/no brakes or steering by then. Slow route involved jumping across the 2 skinny corners with a 180 degree turn in between, rather than doing them straight IYSWIM. Managed the manoevre to clear them, God knows how, buit failed to make the turn after the second one before the ropes - horse locked on to the advertising hoarding (H&H as it goes :D ) and leapt it into the crowd. I yelled profanities, hauled him round, jumped back over the rope (yes, sorry, thought police, I really did - blame it on too much adrenaline) galloped off shouting apologies for the profanities, and popped the last fence :cool: We have it all on video - think SpottedCat has seen it?!
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:D:D opps!! any chance of loading said video up?
x
 
When jumping as a junior I qualified for a large show, was jumping fab. Went into the double pony put in a dirty last minute stop, carried on going taking bridle with me. Pony then had the most wonderful time galloping around showground, refusing to be caught and creating utter mayhem.

BE I missed out a fence on a PN cross country, it was a step up out of the water clearly marked part b! I merrily cantered past it thinking 'oh look there's a part b as well' and didn't think to try and rectify my mistake.

My first BE novice, I had lain awake the night before bricking myself about the XC. On the day my horse was just awesome and gave me the ride of my life. As I finished I was so proud I literally burst into tears as we landed over the last, pulled him up jumped off and gave him a big hug. As I lead him away I heard the loudspeaker announcing that I was eliminated for not going through the finish...
For some reason as well there is some glitch that means that result above never shows up on my horses BE record.
 
taking henry to any show is generally numpty -come last or get elim... doesnt stop me from trying tho!
 
the worst numpty moment i had was stepping outside of the penalty zone at a 3* CCI (seriously showing my age, how many remember those), and losing 5th place because of it.
tried to walk an int and adv course together and failed to spot a corner fence on the adv so missed it didn't speak to anyone for 2 hrs!!:mad: and with it qual for a 3day, oops had to drive 9hrs in a bedford tk to find another adv to qualify. :(
turned up at Blenheim without horses passport , que Dad having to drive 2 1/2 hrs to bring said passport up and then i had to withdraw after dressage as pony not right!:(
 
I don't properly compete but have done a few local things and still managed to balls it up! :D At our first one day event, we got eliminated...........in the DRESSAGE! :embarrassed: TarrSteps was actually the judge and (if she remembers) I think she'll agree that Zoom was not playing!! She had gone really nicely the weeks leading up to it but decided that legs touching her sides meant jump sideways over the boards in fright :(

We also had a wardrobe malfunction at RAF Halton ride. I jumped off at a checkpoint to rearrange numnah and prolite. As I got back on I had said to the steward NOT to hold onto her reins and she likes to run off as I mount (better now but still not great) and holding reins makes her freak out. Cue pony rearing over backwards as I got on :( Luckily we were both fine but the stewards all looked a little pale!
 
I've had a couple of very embarrassing moments eventing.

I was taking my new horse to do our first event together at the Novice at Lincoln. He had previously been ridden by a 4* pro, and was well established at Intermediate. We bolted in the dressage warm up, couldn't pull up for 10 mins!!! Actually did an ok test though!. Warmed up for the SJ well. Just as I went in I noticed the 4* pro (previous rider) watching. Jumped the first 2 fences fine, then stopped at the third, jumped it second time. Came round to the related distance, completly buggered up stride, horse stopped, I didn't. Managed to keep hold of my horse, but then I couldnt get back on him. I have very short legs! I had to shout to the jump crew to leg me up, but being 12yo army cadets it wasn't going to happen. At this point the 4* pro (who used to ride the horse) came running over, legged me up, told me to bloody well ride, and left the ring. Strangely enough I jumped clear round the rest of the course!!! I think I ended up with 16 jumping penalties and 36 time!!!!!!! For some mad reason I decided to run XC. Was just about to go, when XC realised I had to see the doctor before I was allowed to go XC as I had fallen off in the SJ. Quickly saw doctor who said I was fine, and set off. I say set off, horse bolted out of the start box, me with no control whatsoever. Got to the 4th fence, horse took a stride out, threw his head up because I caught him in the mouth, and my face smashed into his neck. I have no memory of the rest of the course (or the day for that matter) as my nose was smashed, and I had a major concussion. However I did somehow finish the course with 60 jumping penalties and 90 time penalties. I still don't know why I wasn't pulled up as I had blood pouring down my face, and was obviously somewhat dazed!!!! My hat was completly smashed!!!!!

The other numpty moment was in a CCI* at Weston Park. I ran XC at lunchtime. I set off, going really well. Got about 1/3rd of the way round the course, when a little army cadet who was on a crossing point decided to open his paper lunch bag just as I was passing. My mare lept sideways straight over the string and bolted home with me. Eventually managed to pull her up and turn around, and get back on the course. Managed to finish with a clear round and only 4 seconds over the time!!!!!!!!
 
At the RC area horse trial qualifiers last year - I was on the XC and stupidly relaxed for the last half as all the "nasties" were out of the way and we'd done the course plenty of times before, I cruised in quite tight to the 2nd last fence as I was going for time and we literally just ran straight past it! I was SO livid with myself, I had just sat there and expected him to pop it (he normally does but I took the piss on this occassion!). The "refusal" cost us the win individually :( Now mum is always saying to me "ride EVERY fence, including the last".
 
shivpryke said:
turned up on the wrong day, plaited, driven an hour etc to find out the comp was the day before
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Lol, I did that! I entered my first Jump Cross which was a 2 hr drive away. On the Saturday night I phoned for times (thinking it was on the Sunday) only to be told that the event had taken place that day and they'd wondered where I was!! Alas I still have never tried jump cross...!
 
Gosh, and I thought mine was bad!

Worst was PC Area Horse Trials....team jobbie.

Fine dressage, clear good SJ, clear great XC with no time........heading for a team 2nd and an individual place.......

Or we would have done, had I gone through the start box!
 
Went wrong twice at BE100 last year (HC), so was E. First time finished on a 30-which would have won it!

Last weekend at Auchinleck intermadiate, first one (bar disaster at Aske last year) had a 42 dressage and 1 down sj. Shannah was jumping out of his skin over huge fences, I thought 'WOW, lets go for the time' and promptly fell off at the smallest fence at 12 as got too close. Got back on but then had a 20 3 from home so retired. Convinced I had I not fallen he would have gone clear (pulled his back after our incident) and would have come about 11th!
 
HotToTrot said:
Ok. My first BE with my 5 yr old after several horseless years:

1. Horse had a tantrum and broke headollar before we left, so I mended with a bit of string.

2. Took wrong turn into event. Drove onto XC course. XC was held whilst I turned round and drove out.

3. Went to get number to find mine had been given to someone else. Was told to look out for mine and was given substitute.

4. Saw my number warming up in DR. Politely enquired as to whether it was mine (see point 3), received v cantankerous reply.

5. Went in to SJ, commentator announced rather shirtily that I was wearing worng number, please rectify (see point 3).

6. Horse at annoying babyish "I won't be left" stage. Was on own so had to take horse with me everywhere I went, on bit of string, like gypsy pony (see point 1).

7. Horse booted me when taking out studs. V painful.

8. Tried to leave, lorry wouldn't work.

9. No reception on phone. Hopped (see point 7) to tractor. Left gyppo-bit-of-string-horse (see point 1) with a stranger to hold (see point 6) . Hitched lift to top of hill. Called AA.

10. Received dressing down for driving in wrong entrance (see point 2).

11. Lorry fixed by AA in a hotwiring fashion. Could not switch off ignition for fear of being unable to re-hotwire.

12. Got home, realised had lost bridle.
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Lol Hottotrot, that's the funniest thing I've read for a long time. Comiserations for your eventful day, but brilliant post!! :D
 
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