Moving on after having horse pts.

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mollypoppy4

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So I had my beautiful girl put to sleep back in july, I utterly adored her but needed to the kind thing. Really struggling to think about getting another as I just had such bad luck. Although I'm keeping my bum in the saddle, I'm missing the relationship side of things and still feeling like part of me is missing. Just wondering whether others took up sharing or got others to help them through this?
Thanks in advance!!
 
I bought a son of my 'horse of a lifetime' after I lost him to colic. Total knee jerk reaction but luckily it has worked out and he is my new 'horse of a lifetime'. I was totally heartbroken at the time and off sick for months. It was the last straw after divorce, selling house, land and horses etc. I had built my new life around my old boy, found a suitable livery yard for him before I looked for a home for myself etc. Give yourself time to heal and the right course of action for you will become apparent. Just be open to every possibility. Horsey holidays here and abroad, simulator lessons, schoolmaster dressage lessons, trekking . . . anything that will help you to decide which direction you want your horsey future to head.
 
The best thing I did when I lost my horse of a life time suddenly and unexpectedly was get my new mare. The looking part however was horrible. However then I saw her on a dealers website and smiled for the first time since my horse died. I knew immediately she was the one for me and I bought her unseen from Ireland on the strength of three pics and one video (and a vetting). I've had her nearly 2 years now and while I still miss my other horse every day, she has helped patch up the gaping hole and given me so much joy.
 
I lost mine a year ago and fully intended to take at least the winter off, decide what I wanted to do, and take my time. I was utterly miserable without my own - I started looking "just to see what's out there" after about three weeks, still intending to wait and take my time, and found the perfect horse a fortnight later. I said when I bought her that this was my last throw of the dice - too much pain, money and heartache to go through - but nine months on I'm not sure I'll ever cope without one in my life.

We're all different, and the important thing is to do what will make you most happy, not what you think other people thing you should do. Some need longer to mourn. Some feel the void too much to cope without one.
 
I lost my horse to suspected EGS last April. I was heartbroken and although I had my mini shetland to love, he was very sad as he'd lost his buddy and I missed having a horse so a friend gave me a horse which i had for a month and didn't work out and then in the June I found my girl on a dealers site. Tried her and fell in love.
 
I lost my horse of a lifetime in 2013. I got two unsuccessful loan horse one after the other and felt deflated and like I wanted to give up horses. Then 3 months later as a surprise my parents found my new horse who is my everything.
 
Whenever i have lost an animal I have found getting a new animal helps me move on. The new animal does not replace the old animal , nothing ever could. It does help me focus and get on with things. I would not be without my dogs or with out my horses.
 
I lost my horse of a life time in Feb 2014 and then loaned for a year before eventually buying another lovely horse. All was good until I lost him six months later in Feb 2016. I couldn't face getting another, so I'm having a break from horses which I have to admit feels awful. Like you, I really miss the relationship side of things, as well as the actual riding. I was riding a friend's horse, but I'm now pregnant so obviously another horse isn't an option for me at the moment. However, I still get very upset about the two horses I lost. If I was in your position I would look at getting another when you feel you are ready. Your old horse will never be replaced but you can develop a new bond and love for a different horse. Just make sure you give yourself time before getting another. Big hugs.
 
I lost my mare in February this year. Found her dead in the field, no idea what caused it she was only 16 and perfectly healthy (from what you can see). Devastated I never got to say goodbye. I had no money to buy another, no desire to ride anything else, so decided to wait and save and just keep my eyes on the usual sites. I bought my new horse roughly a month later much sooner than I had planned lol, decided to go for something completely different so no chance to compare. He's proved a wonderful distraction and I can honestly say I can't wait to ride him (he's only 2) I did need to get another as my pony was left on his own and wasn't fair on him. I still miss her but then I have so many memories which all make me smile.
Everyone is different but I find having another does help with the process as they keep you busy with a purpose.
 
After losing my boy I was lucky in a way that I had kept his daughter and that little filly helped me carry on where otherwise I don't know what I would have done. I hung up his tack and left it there. 1.5yrs later I bought another stallion and it was another 6 months before I used that stallion bridle again. Now Riley's allowed to wear it. Last year I was lucky enough to be able to have the opportunity to put my lost boy's dam in foal so I asked to put her to my Riley. Now his beautiful half brother is weaned and standing in my stables and that little foal means the world to me.

I can honestly say it's taken me a fair while to move on though. It's taken till this year for there to be another chestnut on the yard. I still expect him to pop his head out of the middle stable sometimes... No one uses that box
 
I probably did the wrong thing when i had my mare, who i'd had for 11 years put down. i went out and bought the first horse i saw a week later. Took me a while to stop comparing the 2 but he kept me busy and my mind occupied which is just what i needed at the time. 8 years later hes still here and i wouldn't swop him for anything. In fact we have an even stronger bond than i did with my mare.
 
I struggled after having my pony put to sleep; the fear of having a bad experience again took a long time to subside. Once I was ready to start looking again the longing for another grew quite quickly. I definitely found the loss of companionship very difficult to adjust to and that's what really pulled me through to wanting another again - only another would do it for me. You'll know when the time is right but in the meantime ride as much as you can, different horses, have lessons, look after friend's while they go on holiday... that sort of thing. And the fog will lift and you'll know the path you want to take. Thinking of you and feel free to PM if you want to talk about it :)
 
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I lost 2 in 7 months leaving me without a horse. I also work with horses 2 days a week so still had a grudging contact with them (I very nearly quit my job). Once the insurance money came through I started looking for a horse. I looked at lots and none did it for me. I felt pretty dispondant. I eventually bought one as I was desperate to get a horse and felt if I didn't get one soon I never would. Short story was it was the wrong horse, I was miserable and he wasn't happy either. After 6 months I sold him. People kept saying to give it longer, eventually my boss was blunt and said to sell him. About 2 months later I bought my new boy. As soon as I met him I loved him and wanted him. 7 months later I am very fond of him and look forward to seeing him. Horse before that I only did/rode/groomed because I had to. However I am left with a huge fear of loosing him too. He got lymphangis and I panicked thinking I would loose him (he is fine). I will never get over loosing my boys but Robin is letting me enjoy horses again and have a bond with him I never thought I would get again.
 
My mare was PTS Easter weekend this year I started looking straightaway for a new friend..but I looked at everything but another Friesian. Nothing "fitted"....a friend made me look at another Friesian - and I just knew I had to have her and by mid June my stable was filled. I sometimes call new mare by old mare s name - but that's a compliment because she s slotted right into my life and heart.
 
I had my mare PTS in July. It wasn't a shock as it was several months in coming. I have another horse and she was fretting having lost her companion and I was still paying for livery so being very practical I went out and bought another horse straight away. I resented him for the first few weeks because he wasn't my old horse and it was strange seeing a grey Connie head over the stable door instead of the dark bay TB head. He is a lovely sweet boy and there is nothing wrong with him. I am now coming around to warm to him fully.
 
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