Moving yard and people

[bz88]

Why do people on my current yard are funny about me moving? Not even yo and although he said he hates me going(good livery badge here!) but he knows he can’t provide facilities we need.
I get comments to better think about it or better the devil you know ect. Seems like nobody is happy for us and wishing us well.
Half of the people stopped talking to me since news about me moving has gone around.
I know it’s a lot to consider but I’m doing the right thing I hope as my pony isn’t quite settled there anyway and finds it too busy as we are on working farm plus I need someone reliable to help when I need help. We have freelancer groom but he comes when he’s pleased and horses are often turned out very late or left in the field on their own freaking out so I’ve been doing it all myself to make sure it won’t unsettle my horse further but I do ideally need assistance.
I’m quite upset by people reaction. I need a hug and tissue.

 

[Jenko109]

Meh. You're moving. You wont have to see them again.

Make new friends at your new yard. Hopefully they aren't weirdo hags like at your current yard.

 

[JumpTheMoon1]

Do what you have to do and moving to another yard is nothing to do with other people.Toughen up and stop letting others spoil things for you.Bullies and undesirable people are far too many these days.Good luck.

 

[Trouper]

They sound envious that you have had the courage to put your horse's needs (and your own peace of mind) first. You meet lots of people like that in life - if you have thought through the issue carefully and made your decision don't be influenced by those who clearly have not.

 

[Pearlsasinger]

I don't understand why you care about what other people think. If you know you have made the best decision for your horse and yourself, just have the courage of your convictions and carry on with your arrangements to move. You will have no need to even see these people, let alone speak to them, after your move.

 

[Sossigpoker]

Because most horsey people are toxic and absolutely vile !
Just enjoy your horse and count the days til you leave. At the end of the day , it's where your horse lives , not a social club !

 

[Palindrome]

People saying to think about it and better the devil you know are explaining to you why they themselves don't move. How people talk are often more a reflection of them.
If the care/service is not to your standard, some are also perhaps trying to justify why they are staying.

 

[PSD]

I had this when I moved, which confirmed why I wanted to move. I had liveries saying “oh I think you’re stupid, you’ll regret it, you won’t get back on once you go” blah blah. When in fact they hadn’t considered the reasons why I was moving and it was for my horse more than me.

It’s the best decision I’ve ever made, I’ve since not spoken to any of the people that made comments. They’re irrelevant so don’t let it get to you.

 

[Petmurf]

I’ve literally moved yards an hour ago and I had the same thing, people basically asking me to justify to them why I was leaving and then the last 2 weeks I’ve been left out of hacks etc but I’m not bothered, I moved from full to diy so that I can save money and hang onto my boy for longer so it’s all about us staying together and no one else’s business.

 

[Jellymoon]

Honestly, I knows it’s hard, but please try not to think about it. People are strange, and horse people, the strangest. Perhaps they are jealous, or maybe they feel by leaving you are dissing them and their choice of yard, who the hell knows, who the hell cares! Maybe feel flattered they are trying to get you stay rather than throwing a party!!
Also, if they are leaving you out of things, it’s only because they want to talk about you behind your back…so that’s ok isn’t it,

 

[Barton Bounty]

Meh. You're moving. You wont have to see them again.

Make new friends at your new yard. Hopefully they aren't weirdo hags like at your current yard.

best post today

 

[Zoeypxo]

They are probably jealous

 

[honetpot]

There is so much b!tching when people move, that people just expect that they will be talked about, once you have left, its unfortunate but it's what happens. If you have been honest and straight forward for your reasons for moving, just treat them how you would have before and ignore it. You never know when you will meet again, the horse world tends to be a small one. It's a bit like the break up of any relationship, someone needs to be at fault to explain it, but in reality people and circumstances change over time, and that's normal.

 

[twobearsarthur]

I was only talking about this to a friend the other day. My strangest experience was when I was getting divorced and had to sell my horse, people who I thought were friends on the yard ignored me/were funny/plain rude. I literally no longer had a horse (or a house at that point) and they seemed to be unable to comprehend I wouldn’t need a livery yard without a horse. We spent a good hour exchanging horror stories when we’d handed in notice at yards, so you aren’t alone in experiencing this.

 

[eahotson]

I was only talking about this to a friend the other day. My strangest experience was when I was getting divorced and had to sell my horse, people who I thought were friends on the yard ignored me/were funny/plain rude. I literally no longer had a horse (or a house at that point) and they seemed to be unable to comprehend I wouldn’t need a livery yard without a horse. We spent a good hour exchanging horror stories when we’d handed in notice at yards, so you aren’t alone in experiencing this.

That must have been a tough time.

 

[twobearsarthur]

That must have been a tough time.

It was brutal and the last thing I needed was people I thought were friends judging me for being forced to sell my horse, when I was also losing my house and everything I’d worked 20+ years building. Horsey people can be very strange at times.

 

[eahotson]

I hope things have picked up for you since.Have you got another horse?

 

[Flowerofthefen]

I hope things have picked up for you since.Have you got another horse?

I'm sorry but this made me smile!! Twobearsarthur my dad left when my brother and I were teenagers. He tried to take house etc. Mum to had to fight for it so I sort of know what you went through. I just thought it was funny that eahotson asked if you had another horse, rather than a house!! Sorry no offence intended, we all have one track horsey minds!!

 

[Sossigpoker]

I'm leaving my yard at the end of the month. Haven't even bothered to tell all of them in going. They've proven themselves to be gossipy shit stirrers anyway so why should I care? I'm literally there to enjoy my horse - tolerating them has been a necessary evil

 

[eahotson]

I'm sorry but this made me smile!! Twobearsarthur my dad left when my brother and I were teenagers. He tried to take house etc. Mum to had to fight for it so I sort of know what you went through. I just thought it was funny that eahotson asked if you had another horse, rather than a house!! Sorry no offence intended, we all have one track horsey minds!!

Yes it is funny really.A house is more important really but another horse would somehow show that you were recovering.

 

[eahotson]

I'm leaving my yard at the end of the month. Haven't even bothered to tell all of them in going. They've proven themselves to be gossipy shit stirrers anyway so why should I care? I'm literally there to enjoy my horse - tolerating them has been a necessary evil

I hope you are happier in your new yard and find some nice people.

 

[MuddyMonster]

I honestly wouldn't worry about it.

Just smile, nod and remain non committal