Mums with babies and horses

MSS

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Hi, I recently had my first baby and also have a youngster horse who is at the moment being backed. I am just slightly worried how I can do my horse and look after my baby same time. Please can you tell me your routine and if you have any good "tricks" that would make things little easier? Or am I just crazy for even thinking I can do it and should look for better home for my horse... 😢
 
Don't know... I have a just backed youngster and my baby is due in 3 months so I'll tell you in July!! He is turned away though now, and will be until I can ride again. It doesn't do them any harm.
 
I can't imagine coping with horse plus baby! I was horseless when my child was young and I still struggled, not much help but I think the two must be a real struggle.
 
I've learned that in order to have babies + horses (and if you want to keep your relationship in tact!) a horse that you can pick up and put down is an absolute must. With hurdles such as teething, sickness, bugs, there will be days which stretch into weeks where you can't ride. I used to time my ride when my baby was due a sleep, then park him up in the car next to the arena while i rode, with the window open so i could hear him when he woke up. It's not ideal, but unless you have a mega supportive family and can guarantee making time to ride most days, i'd say a youngster is a bad idea ... and tbh your baby will soon be all grown up and you may regret spending time with your young horse instead of your baby. I kept my horse (my two boys are 12 and 9 now) but the horse had to fit around them, not the other way round. Good luck ��
 
I have a horse on DIY and a 17mth old toddler. I looked after my horse until the day I went into hospital to be induced, and then my instructor looked after her for a couple of weeks whilst I was in hospital (long labour) and recovered at home after. I basically then left my baby in the car (parked outside the stable) whilst I sorted my horse each day. Obviously that didn't include riding and any time I wanted to ride it would be by arrangement that my mum would have my baby (or OH obviously when he was off at weekend). She just used to sleep in the car when I mucked out. Just timed it around her feeds and changes etc. If she needed changing or feeding whilst I was there though I just did it there in my car (bottle fed). Now she's older, she just comes with me in the pushchair and sits at the door of the stable watching Peppa Pig on my iPhone. :). Admittedly, I only get to ride a couple of times per week but my instructor rides my horse 3 times per week (well, that usually includes one lesson for me but if I can't then he rides all three times) so she is kept exercised. You just have to be a bit more organised than before having a child lol.

ETA, in the evenings I go back to the yard to muck out/top up hay (the horses are in a few days per week in winter) after my daughter goes to bed at 7:30 ish.
 
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I can't imagine coping with horse plus baby! I was horseless when my child was young and I still struggled, not much help but I think the two must be a real struggle.

It's not really :). I have a 17mth old, work 70%, and have a horse on DIY, and I manage. But you do have to make compromises. My horse doesn't get pampered or have as much time spent with her anymore (with regard faffing and generally being around her for hours on end), and it's a case of getting what is needed done, and leaving. It's lovely though in the sense that I am mucking out, enjoying what I always have with my horse, and have my gorgeous daughter there with me who loves my mare to bits already. :)
 
I had a baby in August. Horse was hacked for me by a lovely rider whilst I was off. Now she still hacks twice per week, and I school him 3 times. So its a nice balance :)


I was competing in a dressage competition tonight, I loaded and travelled horse alone, and OH stopped by with baby later to watch me :) It was very cute!

I work full time, so horse is full livery and OH is very very good with baby!
 
Moominn, When I read your post I thoguht you sounded like you had it sussed! I had a child before I had a horse of my own (returned to riding in my 40's) I think the other way around you already have the tie, the routine, the structure so you're half way to parenthood without a child! Well done, an inspirational post to the OP!
 
My daughter is two tomorrow and they day I found out I was pregnant I bought a very large, green horse with terrible manners! I did my horses myself up until the day I went in to labour and was back doing them 4 days after, might have been sooner but for all the visitors! I had a difficult birth, giant baby and lots of stitches but managed fine!
As for riding the horse had most of my pregnancy off, I got back on 4 weeks after giving birth I most of my riding in the evenings once baby was in a bed time routine and there was enough light if not just weekends when OH was about. Or I lunged in the field. Like everyone else said I did my stable chores timed round nap times so she slept in the car parked close to the stables. Good luck! You can make it work x
 
I basically then left my baby in the car (parked outside the stable) whilst I sorted my horse each day. Obviously that didn't include riding and any time I wanted to ride it would be by arrangement that my mum would have my baby (or OH obviously when he was off at weekend). She just used to sleep in the car when I mucked out. Just timed it around her feeds and changes etc. If she needed changing or feeding whilst I was there though I just did it there in my car (bottle fed). Now she's older, she just comes with me in the pushchair and sits at the door of the stable watching Peppa Pig on my iPhone. :)

Exactly this! I've got it down to an art! I pick my timings and then my 11month old will sleep in the car usually giving me enough time to muck out in the morning and then school or lunge. Admittedly I only tend to hack at weekends when OH can have her, but I don't mind, we school in the week and take it easy with lovely long hacks at the weekends :) I also work part time and irregular hours. It's a hell of a lot easier then I was expecting tbh. But then my YO is fantastic with kids and my mum is retired and does grandma duties if I ever want horsey tlc.
 
Exactly this! I've got it down to an art! I pick my timings and then my 11month old will sleep in the car usually giving me enough time to muck out in the morning and then school or lunge. Admittedly I only tend to hack at weekends when OH can have her, but I don't mind, we school in the week and take it easy with lovely long hacks at the weekends :) I also work part time and irregular hours. It's a hell of a lot easier then I was expecting tbh. But then my YO is fantastic with kids and my mum is retired and does grandma duties if I ever want horsey tlc.

Oh wow, you are one lucky person with an 11mth old still sleeping in the car lol. My little girl sadly stopped that many moons ago (she's a noisy little nosey parker basically haha) so she had to start sitting in her pushchair with Peppa Pig movies from around 9mths on lol. But it's all good fun and lovely to be able to share your enjoyment with your little one. My little girl laughs her head off when I play peekaboo from around the back of my horse's bum. My mare isn't quite so sure though, she looks quite perplexed lol.
 
Moominn, When I read your post I thoguht you sounded like you had it sussed! I had a child before I had a horse of my own (returned to riding in my 40's) I think the other way around you already have the tie, the routine, the structure so you're half way to parenthood without a child! Well done, an inspirational post to the OP!

Oh yes it def makes a difference I think. Had I not have already had my mare there is no way I would have considered getting one after I had my baby. But because I already had my mare, there was no way on this planet I was letting her go, she is with me for life so both horse and child will learn to cope around each other lol. And when Moomin 2 comes along within the next couple of years hopefully as planned I will make damn sure the same happens again. :) To be fair, I have had a very understanding OH and a fantastic instructor who has made many things possible which otherwise would have been a major stress.
 
As already suggested, a horse that you can pick up and put down!, I had 3 at the time my daughter was born inc 1 youngster and 1 crazy project and bought another youngster when she was 6 weeks old and a barely handled stallion when she was 6 months but they all lived out and all could go without being worked (of those that were broken) so over winter is just a case of her the jobs done and get my daughter home, I have no help with childcare outside of work hours as OH works long hours himself and I don't drive (luckily work is literally seconds down the road from my horses) so it can be done but i couldnt have managed if i had they were all stabled and high maintanence, you just find a way and get on with it
 
Oh wow, you are one lucky person with an 11mth old still sleeping in the car lol. My little girl sadly stopped that many moons ago (she's a noisy little nosey parker basically haha) so she had to start sitting in her pushchair with Peppa Pig movies from around 9mths on lol. But it's all good fun and lovely to be able to share your enjoyment with your little one. My little girl laughs her head off when I play peekaboo from around the back of my horse's bum. My mare isn't quite so sure though, she looks quite perplexed lol.

My little girl is a bit of a 'ahem' diva. And tends to scream at the yard constantly if I get her out the car. She's a massive attention seeker, but, like the true princess she is, she'll happily sit in the car listening to the radio, with a tablet playing Ben and Holly until she falls asleep. I have about an hour and a half window before she either wakes and wants attention or she's decided I've had enough fun playing horsey and she requires my immediate attention and will shout and scream (not crying) until she gets it. Hopefully it'll get better when she's toddling around and she'll show more interest. I'm pretty sure she's just jealous of the horse xD
 
My little girl is a bit of a 'ahem' diva. And tends to scream at the yard constantly if I get her out the car. She's a massive attention seeker, but, like the true princess she is, she'll happily sit in the car listening to the radio, with a tablet playing Ben and Holly until she falls asleep. I have about an hour and a half window before she either wakes and wants attention or she's decided I've had enough fun playing horsey and she requires my immediate attention and will shout and scream (not crying) until she gets it. Hopefully it'll get better when she's toddling around and she'll show more interest. I'm pretty sure she's just jealous of the horse xD

Haha yes I know what you mean. My little girl did gripe a little bit to start with in the pushchair but I tend to just post a few chocolate buttons in her mouth and tell her she will make the horsey cry if she doesn't shush (bad mum lol). The peekaboo from around the back of my horse's bum goes down a treat, along with splashing the water from the hose infront of her. I just keep trying to involve her but also telling her to be patient (ie SHUSH lol) and she tends to pipe down a bit and just watch the birds or the horses in the field then.
 
Completely doable op :-) Obviously depends on how you keep your horse, (livery/at home etc), whether you plan to return to work after mat leave/what sort of job you have and what your support network is like.

Very little babies and horses are actually an easier mix than when they can move! You can get a lot done with a sleeping baby in a pram or car parked within earshot. Fitting stable chores and riding in on a given day might be pushing it with a baby in tow, but guess depends if you are diy or not. I'd say it'd be important with a young horse to have the option to get someone else to work it a bit in the week if needs be, for sake of consistency and routine - which baby humans have a habit of disrupting and baby horses like and need.

I have two horses (one a youngster) and a toddler. I have an amazingly supportive other half. I also don't think it would work for me without floodlights, year round turnout, horse walker - all of which I realise I'm very privileged to have access to.
 
My kids are now 2 and nearly 4 so bit easier now. Or maybe not lol!!! But I had 2 under 2yrs and managed my horse on diy the whole way thru.
My tip is lower your standards!!! There have been times I have only skipped out instead of fully mucking out for example. There have been times I have thrown tack on from the car and jumped on as I only had 20mins. Horse covered in mud.
Now I am often at the yard gone 7pm when kids and bed and on the days I work sometimes have to go on my lunch break and muck out etc as don't have the time either side of the day. Ideal? No prob not but you just got to plan and crack on!
Me and my other half came up with a weekly rota so when we are not working we spilt the free time between doing something all together, then me and my other half having equal free time to do as we wish so for me it's the horse, for him it's cars!
My horse has actually become a major part of our family!! Surprisingly as he wasn't really a family horse lol but the kids adore him and love stuffing him full of carrots and crap!!!
Plus when u have young kids who wants to be stuck in the house all day?? Not me thanks. Much better for everyone to be out and about getting fresh air and muddy!!! 😋
 
My kids are now 2 and nearly 4 so bit easier now. Or maybe not lol!!! But I had 2 under 2yrs and managed my horse on diy the whole way thru.
My tip is lower your standards!!! There have been times I have only skipped out instead of fully mucking out for example. There have been times I have thrown tack on from the car and jumped on as I only had 20mins. Horse covered in mud.
Now I am often at the yard gone 7pm when kids and bed and on the days I work sometimes have to go on my lunch break and muck out etc as don't have the time either side of the day. Ideal? No prob not but you just got to plan and crack on!
Me and my other half came up with a weekly rota so when we are not working we spilt the free time between doing something all together, then me and my other half having equal free time to do as we wish so for me it's the horse, for him it's cars!
My horse has actually become a major part of our family!! Surprisingly as he wasn't really a family horse lol but the kids adore him and love stuffing him full of carrots and crap!!!
Plus when u have young kids who wants to be stuck in the house all day?? Not me thanks. Much better for everyone to be out and about getting fresh air and muddy!!! ��

Good advice!

Definitely lower your expectations. The main prob will be complete lack of time (or I should say, child-free time!) but it is do able.

I have 2 (well 3 if you count fat nannie pony that's on loan to us temporarily) horses on DIY. Luckily one is 22 years old and although I would like to do more with him (still perfectly fit and capable) but I can leave him to grass without feeling guilty or ride him if I get chance.

Other horse is only a weanling (home bred) and to be honest only comes in to be trimmed/inject or something - she doesn't need to be faffed about with all the time and as a result she is a very polite, unspoilt youngster so far.

My children are 1 and 4 now and I've been through the whole newborn baby + horses in during winter scenario and it sure isn't easy, and I did the breastfeed on demand thing (and would do again). You find a way - somehow.

By the time our filly is old enough to be doing work with, our youngest child will have started nursery, so it should be possible! Oh and I work 33hrs a week shifts in a demanding job.

I would lie if I said I hadn't considered jacking in the horses, there have been many tears of frustration at points where I thought I couldn't do it any more. BUT the horses are still here and we are managing and I can't imagine life without horses, so that's how it is.

The only thing I would worry about for you would be the horse being a youngster and needing time and patience. With baby horses sometimes you can't do a quick planned session as they decide otherwise etc. But you know your situation and maybe you will find the time. I struggle to ride more than twice a week if the weather is kind, but I have had to accept stretches of no riding and just making sure what needs done is done!

Good luck. You're not alone :-)
 
Good advice!

Definitely lower your expectations. The main prob will be complete lack of time (or I should say, child-free time!) but it is do able.

This! My little boy is just 3. My horse was on full livery anyway and thank goodness as I was very ill in the weeks before the birth then ended up having an emergency C section which rendered me totally useless physically for months - managed to re-open the wound and got infected. I was also very ill after with high blood pressure and ended up back in hospital.

Timing is key and if anyone offers you help/support then take it! I have no family to help and envy those who do.

My horse was kept ticking over whilst I was out of action by someone I knew who was horseless at the time. He isn;t a total dobbin but he did fine.

I went back at work fulltime and currently going through the horrors of potty training. I manage to ride 2/3 week nights, have a lesson on Saturday mornings between swimming and OH disaapearing to play football in the afternoon then hack early on Sundays.

I am rigid in my horse time - I allow 90 mins max on week nights to ride so I can be home by 7.15pm to do bed time. Often a case of bowl up, tack-up, throw on chaps over work trousers and get going. I set my timer on my phone.

I think I have the balance right now but can no longer spend the day at the yard titivating as I did BC.

Sleep is very overrated - or so I keep telling myself!

Good luck.
 
My tip is lower your standards!!!

This is key. I have guilt everytime my OH looks after mini at the weekend, when I'm sure I shouldn't, but I'm always rushing everywhere to get everything done, I don't really get nice horsey time anymore. Horse gets a brush thrown at his saddle area and then I get on. I get my boy back from rehab in a few weeks, and I'll have to start doing more then, as he needs work on the roads. I'm hoping to get up a bit earlier and walk him and dog together (both in hand) I hope as long as I can do 30 mins a few days a week before work (once it gets lighter) we will manage. I think about 6am should be enough, maybe a bit earlier. I can't deal with much earlier due to some nights still not being great sleep wise. I also really hope we manage to put in an arena this year as that will revolutionise my life, I will be able to play for 20 mins whilst mini (2.5 yo) fills buckets with water, or 'mucks out' with her wheelbarrow.

I never ride in the week if I don't do it then as the OH works 12 hour days regularly, so I have to be back by 7am so he can go, and then often I do nursery pick up (I work 4 days) tea and bedtime by myself as the OH doesn't get back til 8pm. I'm knackered by then! If its nice in the summer I can imagine I might do some late night horsey stuff after bedtime, but it requires a lot of effort :p

As a baby it was easy, she would either sleep in the car, or I would prop her in the hay bar whilst I mucked out. Just get used to a bit a crying, and get stuff done before you deal with it. I should have done more of that probably as mini is still very attached and demanding lol. I tried to muck out with her in the sling but it wasn't that great (sling on the front) and I worried about all the dust and ammonia on her little nose.
 
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Oh and things like farrier appointments need military organisation. In a perfect world I would need full livery and help exercising - I think it would be much , much easier - but I cannot justify the £ on that! And I love working with them.

It's very character building stuff :-)

I'm sure I will look back in 5-10 years and laugh!

I have a rucksack for 1 year old she can sit in on my back but you are still limited to what you can safely manage. For example I would lead old horse no worries, but no way with filly, as good as she seems I just wouldn't risk it. Mucking out is very difficult with it on too :-/
 
When mind were little, I got a governess cart and harness, and broke my pony to drive. That way I could go out for hours with him AND the babies... leaving OH to have a bit of a break, as he was looking after them all week whilst I was at work.
 
I used to school or lunge while the baby was asleep, the monitor worked from his bedroom to the paddock. :-)
It is easy while they are really small because they sleep so much and can't get anywhere (ie into trouble) without help, so as they get more active and time consuming you gradually adapt.
 
I used to school or lunge while the baby was asleep, the monitor worked from his bedroom to the paddock. :-)
It is easy while they are really small because they sleep so much and can't get anywhere (ie into trouble) without help, so as they get more active and time consuming you gradually adapt.

This is ideal if your horses are at home. Unfortunately mine are livery - if I were lucky enough to have them at home that would've made things so much easier. ..if only!
 
I had just backed my four year old when I found out I was pregnant so left her until after the baby was born. I then tried to ride as often as possible while my OH looked after the baby. It was not ideal but managed. I also had another two horses at the time, all at home with me so baby just came out the stables with me while I mucked out, brushed, fed etc. It is workable just needs planning and goid family around you.
 
When I got my pony I had a 6minth old and a 2 year old. I was lucky and had friends out at the yard who would babysit while I rode (baby was in the carrier the whole time). Everything else was done with a baby strapped to me and the 2 year old tagging along.
 
My son is 3.5yr old now but what I would say is its FAR easier to get things done and ride when they're a baby than when they get on the move (and therefore you can't strap them down anymore and they stop napping!). When my son was young, I used to time it so he'd be sleeping in his car seat / pram then park him on the other side of the paddock fence while I rode and did yard stuff. If the weather was bad / cold or I wanted to go for a hack then I'd sometimes get my mum / OH to watch him instead. I went out competing again early on and my mother was the only way this was achieved (and still is!), her role went from groom to babysitter so if you can, get family involved as much as you can ;)

Someone has mentioned having a horse you don't have to ride daily is very handy, I totally agree. I've always been lucky and had horses just like this because its not just early on, its for several years that you will find you can't necessarily ride every day... for example, my son currently goes to school nursery for 3 hours most days which means I only have that 3 hour window to muck out / ride etc. so I just have to hope the weather is good during this short window every day!
 
MiniBoo1 was a Velcro baby and I struggled to put her down long enough to ride a horse. MiniBoo2 was more laid back as a baby but is a horror of a toddler and I can't take my eyes off him for two seconds. I only managed to ride when I had childcare but it does get easier when they are regularly in nursery/school - if they are not home sick!
 
My DS is 7 months, and I've been on my horse twice since he was born :( . Some of this is simply getting out of the habit; but also lack of facilities and the fact that he had so much time off. I chose not to ride when pregnant. Mind you, winter didn't encourage me to get on board, and now I'm itching. The main issue is prioritisation. For instance if my DH has already looked after him before work so I can feed them and poo pick, or even have a lie in, I can't expect him to also let me ride. I breastfeed so it's only recently that I've felt like there would be a solid window to go for a hack but it's not possible unless DH is at home. Many people have mentioned their mum and honestly without a non-working helper, it's going to be very very hard. I thought I had it sussed as my mum was made redundant, but looks like she has another job lined up. Boo ;)

I should say although horses are at home, I have no arena so really can't ride when baby sleeps. I don't think the monitor would stretch to a hack!
 
My DS is 7 months, and I've been on my horse twice since he was born :( . Some of this is simply getting out of the habit; but also lack of facilities and the fact that he had so much time off. I chose not to ride when pregnant. Mind you, winter didn't encourage me to get on board, and now I'm itching. The main issue is prioritisation. For instance if my DH has already looked after him before work so I can feed them and poo pick, or even have a lie in, I can't expect him to also let me ride. I breastfeed so it's only recently that I've felt like there would be a solid window to go for a hack but it's not possible unless DH is at home. Many people have mentioned their mum and honestly without a non-working helper, it's going to be very very hard. I thought I had it sussed as my mum was made redundant, but looks like she has another job lined up. Boo ;)

I should say although horses are at home, I have no arena so really can't ride when baby sleeps. I don't think the monitor would stretch to a hack!

Can you take him with you to poo pick and feed the horses? Then that would free time up for you to ride if your OH has him then? With regard bf, I don't have any advice on that as I bottle fed from birth (for that reason mainly, though also because I really didn't want to bf anyway). Your OH must have some days off, can he not have your son for a few hours so you can ride each week?
 
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