My mare is a write off

B

Bounty

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Feeling downright s**t, so apologies if this doesn't make all that much sense.
The vet has just been out to follow up continuing lameness in my mare, following her developing chronic tenosynovitis back in mid-october. Seemed a straightforward case at the time, scans weren't seen as necessary and that time would hold the cure.
Just spend the afteroon flexing and nerve blocking, poking and prodding, and he has suspicion of bone spavin in both hocks, thickening at the lower end of the SDFT in the right hind, and thickening of the coffin bone/joint in both hinds, right worse than left.
She's in for scans and xrays next week, but i'm not sure i see the point. She's 4/10th lame on a daily basis when buted up, and 7/10th lame after flexions. Slightly better after nerve blocking of her hocks, but not hugely.
It sounds harsh but i think this may well be the end of the road for her, she's incredibly quirky and can be hard to handle for anyone except me (to the point where i have to do the flexion tests as the vet can't). I already have one horse semi-retired here and can't afford another, especially one that needs medicating to stay sound.
She's everything i wanted in replacement for my oldie that is already semi-retired (my horse of a lifetime), an absolute carbon copy. Absolutely gutted, she's only nine and i've had one breathtaking season with her - she was supposed to play for me for years and years to come. Can't even breed from her. Argh, not supposed to be like this.
 
Oh hunny I am so sorry to hear this, you have had such rotten luck over the last few months
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Cannot offer any advice but if you need any help or just a chat I am only a phonecall away

*Huge Hugs*
 
Reading your post is gutting
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. I'm really sorry that the vet has found the case worse than initially thought, a real bummer
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And it's more disheartening that your mare is only 9. My instructor years ago had a similar situation. Got a new youngster, Biggles, who was showing signs of being a great horse for her. He started with slight lameness etc and it eventually turned out it was navicular. She was gutted and felt it was really unfair. You sound to be a person with common sense and a realistic outlook so all I can say is keep your chin up. (sorry it sounds so inadequate)
 
I'd just love to have the money (and the space) to keep her joints medicated and have her hacking out lightly. As it is she's already been in pain and on daily bute for five months which i feel so, so awful for putting her through.
Things are only going to get worse for her, and she lives to play, so i can't really see a enjoyable future for her anyway even if the money and space were available. ugh, rambling!
I've come so far with her in the time i've had her, i've been so proud of her and now i'm devestated.

The next question is...
Do i bother with the full work up next week? She's being nerve blocked further, then scanned and x-rayed. I don't really want to write her off without some kind of proof. Obviously the fact she is as lame as she is and that it's only going to get worse is realistically enough, but somehow i think i'll feel better about having made 'the decision' after seeing the scans and x-rays. But, she is uninsured, so i really would be chucking my money away wouldn't i?
Don't want to think about this!
I know tomorrow the rational side of me will have slightly overtaken the emotional one, but right now i can't think straight.
 
If you dont bother you will never know. I would do the tests and then make a decision. At least then if you have to make a hard decision you know it is in her best interests. Whatever decision you make will be based on facts rather then possibilities. And you will know you made the best decision.

I was in a position a few years ago when I had a lovely youngster injure herself. the vet gave her a 20% chance of recovery to become a broodmare. It sounds daft but I had to give her that chance. She didnt make it sadly and had to be pts 10 weeks later. But I can live with the fact I did my best for her. Finacially I would have been better off to pts immediately but I would never have known if she would have been one of the 20%. So I am glad I did what I did.
 
What a sad story, hope you feel better able to cope with it in the morning - but at least if matters are now clearer for you it may be possible to save her more pain (tough decision for you though)
 
But at the same time she is how she is currently, and will only become worse. The x-rays are primarily to see how bad the spavin is at the moment, and what sort of time scale we're talking about before medication/surgery can't help. Either way, there's no magic cure. Even if the prognosis is relatively good there's no avoiding the fact that she's 4/10ths lame on a good day whilst buted, and that she'll never play again. I can't afford a) the medication to have her sound enough to hack out and b)to have another pet. i already have one very expensive ornament.
Over the last few months she's been fairly miserable, she LOVES being out at parties, and goes loopy with excitement if the ramp of the lorry or trailer comes down. She's a competition animal not a companion. I don't want to keep her around purely because i'm not strong enough to make the decision. I want the absolute best for her, and in this case i don't think that even a 'good' bone spavin prognosis would be enough for my peace of mind.
I'm not really directing this at you dozziesmummy, i <u>am</u> grateful to you for sharing your experience. I'm more typing to organise my feelings than anything else. Sorry.
 
Sorry I misunderstood. I was under the impression the vet wasnt sure what the problem is. If thats not the case and you know there is no chance of a recovery then it is a financial /quality of life decision . Horses can adapt to an easier life but even if you gave her away as a companion you could not be sure she wouldnt end up in a dealers yard being sold to be ridden. Especially at her age. If the prognosis is that she will not be sound again and cannot be used for breeding then you will have to take the hard decision of pts.

Easier said than done, I know. I would be the woosy one who kept the mare as a pet for the next 20 years!!!!

My horse was two! But I have the luxury of my own facilities and could have kept her as a broodmare. She was impeccably bred and therefore was worth breeding from. Which is why I went for it.
But financially it was stupid. I just have the belief that when I take an animal on it is for life, whatever it throws at me. And it is my responsibility to do the best for that animal.

In your case if the best is to PTS then that is what you need to do. Only you can decide because you know your horse.

I really feel for you. it is so much easier when the decision is made for you as it was, eventually, in my case.
 
We do have our own facilities, although limited. Having 4 active, competitive horses here would be one thing, but to have two pets would just not be plausible. I am usually so soft when it comes to things like this, and always like to think i am/have given them the best possible chance, although haven't had to make such life changing (or ending
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) decisions before.
I already feel sick knowing that the last few months where i thought i was doing the right thing have just caused her suffering.
Would have loved to have bred from her, have stud card for the perfect stallion here, but i will NOT breed from something with a form of DJD. In any case, she's definitely not sound enough to support the weight of a foal.
*sigh*
 
i am soooooo sorry and i am sure you will make the right decision for your girl. You can only do the best for her and althogh she will be missed, she can go to all the parties in the horse heaven but please dont have regrets so if you want to see scand/x-rays then do so as its not a matter one wants to regret, wish you all the best x xx
 
I'm sorry to hear this, it doesn't sound good.
In your situation I would turn her away for the summer totally and see how she is in early autumn.
Of course you need to watch her pain level but you would be surprised how some cases like this recover given nothing whatsoever to do.
If however you can't afford to do this then there is no choice but to be brave and take the decision.
It's easy for me to say because I have seen so called hopeless cases arrive here and within three months be virtually sound. I put it down to the fact the land is rarely flat and their joints have to keep moving to cope.
But I'm fortunate in having enough space to do that, many people aren't.
Decide on whether to give her the works or use the same money to give her some time totally at grass (no hacking at all) to see how time works.
If you pm me I will put you in touch with another forum member who is in a similar position and who has turned her mare away, it has recovered a lot and she is hoping it can now be a companion or quiet hack.
 
OMG Bounty I can't believe it, that is devastating news, if you want to have a chat give me a call hun, I'll pm you my number I think you only have my other half's. I don't really know what else to say, what a awful shock for you. Lots of hugs from Ghost and Nose.
 
Thanks all for your kind words. Playing god definitely isn't something that appeals to me! I'd love to be able to keep her around, but I just don't think it's going to be fair on either of us. She lives for being out and about, life as a hack or companion just won't satisfy her. She's truely in an awful state, some days she's not so bad (though still buted) whereas others she drags her hinds whilst moving in the stable because flexion is so difficult. She's worn a straight edge on her hind hooves from doing this, even on rubber mats with shavings.
It's not really about the money, I'd spend every penny available to help her if i thought it was right for her, but it's only ever going to buy me a little time, and in the end we're still going to be faced with this same situation.
9 out of 10 times i let my heart rule my head, but this time i think i'll have to detach my heart for a while.

Feel a little 'woe is me' this morning, spent all night bawling my heart out and went for what was supposed to be my last fracture clinic appointment for my collar bone this morning. Turns out the the bones aren't healing beneath the plate, and are actually moving further apart somehow. He thinks there's an infection in there that my result in my bones rejecting the screws, so may have to be operated on again.
Much more of this and i'll be depressed with a capital D!
 
If you honestly feel her quality of life is poor really you have no choice.
I don't think I would have anymore work done as she sounds in too bad a way to benefit even with a long rest.
I am so sorry for you,it's bad enough normally to have to face this but to have problems with yourself too seems utterly unfair.
I would sort her out then concentrate on yourself, worrying won't be helping your healing either.
I do hope things improve for you soon.
 
Sounds daft suggestion I know, but once the spavin has settled could she not go out on loan as a happy hack? Only mention it as I have a 27 year old mare at my yard with 2 spavins on hind legs and ringbone on fronts. After being retired 3 years ago on 24/7 turnout, her spavins have settled and we started long reining her to see how she was as she started walking very well. She decided last july she no longer wanted her 3 bute a day, synnequine. glucosamine and all the other costly supplements she was on and has started back in to ridden work againin the last couple of months believe it or not. I know she can't have the life you wish for her, but it could be she could have a quality life going forward if you felt able to cope with her situation. I know my little mare is loving doing something more interesting again even if it is very low level - but I also fully understand how hard it is to cope with these things as have just dealt with my boy having major back surgery, so I am definitely not trying to make you feel guilty just trying to give a suggestion.
 
I think you are doing the right thing Bounty by writing your thoughts down, its a good way at getting a clear picture of the situation (IMHO). In these sorts of situations its difficult for "us" on here to give a really "accurate" answer or suggestion as we can't possibly know the whole story but we can at least keep throwing ideas up which may help and of course are here to listen and support as best we can.

You have mentioned two quite crucial points in my opinion - poor diagnosis from the vet and your mare being uncomfortable and lame when on bute.

Keep talking if it's helping. I think I would be thinking along the same lines as you if I was in this situation. You have your mares happiness and health at the top of your list of priorities and that is all you can do.
 
Hi Bounty didn't see your last post before I put mine on. Didn't realise she was so uncomfortable - think you are in an impossible situation as whatever you do you are going to feel guilty. You can only do what you are already doing, which is to put her needs first and do the best for her that you can. If that means you lose her as the best thing for her is to be no longer in pain, then you will have been brave enough to make the hardest decision that anyone ever has to make. My thoughts are with you and I will be hoping for a miracle cure for you in the meantime, they do happen every now and again!
 
Again, thank you all so much. I don't post much, but without the support and common sense that you lot have to offer this would be so much harder.

Didn't post yesterday, but spent the day fairly numb and resigned myself to 'having' to put her down. Today...i really don't know. She seems really bright today and has had a good buck and a gallop about, obviously she's not magically sound, but she was doing ok. Definitely more 2/10ths than the usual 4.
Jess, the girl we bought her from, is coming over this afternoon to say 'goodbye' as it's the only chance she has to get over here for quite a while. It's going to be horribly emotional i think, Jess was Cybele's groom when she came over from Ireland as a 2yo till the polo peeps wrote Cybele off as a useless case at 7. Jess then bought her and rehomed her with me. If it wasn't for Jess's soft spot for Cybele she'd have been pet food.

We'll definitely be going for the x-rays this week, but I'm not so worried about the scans. I'm seriously thinking about seeing what can be done to make her sound enough to plod, if only for the summer. It'd give us that bit more time together.

Oh I don't know!! X
 
Trust your instincts, if you can enjoy her regardless of what work she does and she isn't in pain that would be lovely for you both. She can probably adapt to a change of lifestyle if she has your support and can cope physically, you sound as though you love her very much in which case it would be a shame to lose her. When my old boy retired I was gutted at not being able to ride him but was surprised at how much I enjoyed just being with. We had 12months of great quality time together which I am still really grateful for and when he told us his body couldn't cope any more we let then him go. I still miss him terribly but feel honoured to have been able to be part of his life and have no regrets as I feel I did the best for him that I could. I hope you can find some light from the X-rays and even if you get to enjoy a few quality months if that is what you decide to do, then it will have been worth it.

Good luck and I hope you are able to enjoy her for a little longer.
 
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