my neighbour and only livery has given me 1 wks notice shes leaving!

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alison247

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This is the thread I started the other day-I want someone to hack out with! sorry I don't know how to link.
My neighbour keeps her pony at our small yard with my TB. Their garden backs onto our paddocks but they live three doors away.
They have been here for over three years at £15 per week.
Many times over those three years I have had to bite my tongue about things they have done, for fear of upsetting the neighbours as we all need to live alongside each other in harmony!
Things came to a head on Sunday when for the umpteenth time this summer they took the pony down to mow the grass in their garden.
My TB is fine when pony is out at shows all day or hacking but is extremely stressed when he knows pony is over the otherside of the garden fence, can hear him but can't see him!!!
At 7pm sunday evening they had still not brought pony back so I could not bring mine into his stable otherwise he would have done his nut.
So i left hay feed and rug in his stable thinking well they will bring him in when they bring pony in.
WRONG
Monday morning I go out to put them out and they have been out all night in the torrential rain with no rug on! Theres did but not mine!!!!!
I NEVER go out but went to the pictures for the first time in ages so didn't go back out that evening because I didn't for one minute think they would leave pony in garden and mine out all night in the rain unrugged.
He was soaked tucked up and shivering as most TB's would be!
So I txt Mum at 9am telling her I am really cross. The FIRST time I have ever voiced my disaproval of things they do.
Fast forward to 10pm tonight when her husband txt me to say they are moving pony to a livery yard next sat 20th.
Leaving me with less than nine days to find a companion for my TB.
Sorry for the long rant, I am hoping writing this down on here will release some of the steam I have between my ears!
 
If your horse needs a companion, the only way you can guarantee one is to keep your own. perhaps you could give a home to one from a charity - they have more than they can cope with atm.
 
Agree with the easy to find a companion post. Lots of nice £10 ponies looking for better homes than the inevitable, you are in control, your yard, your stables, no angst!!
 
To be fair its not their fault that your horse cannot cope on his own for a day with the pony over the fence and unless its usual I would not be expecting them to put my horse to bed for me, they pay livery after all

I'm sorry but you come across as pretty unreasonable
 
their pony is surely their pony, not solely your horse's babysitter, so if they decide to take him home to do the lawn, that is up to them? Also, did you call them or text them to ask them to put your horse's rug on and/or bring them in? If you did and they didn't then that wasn't very nice, but if you didn't how were they to know you didn't want him out?
 
Hmm, I don't know maybe I'm reading it wrong but it's your horse your responsibility? If you wanted him brought in later would it not be best to contact the other person instead of assuming? If I had the delight of keeping my pony next door practically, I'd want to take him where I pleased really without worrying about another horse!
 
They pay diy livery, its entirely up to them where they take their pony out to. And don't get your issue with your horse being left out. It's your horse, so unless you actually spoke to them & confirmed they would bring in, that's your fault not theirs. If you want full control, buy your own companion.
 
I'd get a companion. And not expect someone else to not be able to do as they want with their pony ....
I wouldn't like to upset a horse but is definitely want to be able to take mine out without worrying about the other horses owners reaction.....
 
I understand that you're upset because your horse was stressed by events but, he is your responsibility.
Options are really, move to a livery yard where he'll have company or get a second horse.
 
At the end of the day, your horse is your responsibility and if it needs a companion (which is preferable anyway) it is your responsibility to provide it. Do you have a written agreement with your neighbours? If not, then they are perfectly entitled to have their pony come and go as they please. Are they meant to be bringing in and rugging up your horse as part of the agreement? I suggest you get onto a local charity as they will likely have some companion ponies available.
 
Whereabouts are you?

I bet if you advertise there will be someone grateful for cheap livery.

Just make sure you agree how things are done with the new person before they come.

It doesn't sound unreasonable IMO if your horse only stresses when the pony is in the garden. It would be a different matter if they couldn't ride out and leave your horse alone.

Failing that there are plenty of oldies looking for retirement homes
 
Obviously most people have been on bigger yards. One of the reasons to have the hassle of having a livery, and it is a hassle, is not the money,its not worth £15 a week, is the company either human or equine.
Even if it is the YO responsibilty to have a companion for her horse, its only good manners the livery to be aware of the horses distress and do something about it. I have been on a bigger yard and if my pony was going hunting and had to be kept in overnight I would bring in his field companion in, feed him, turn him out and muck him out in the morning as I knew if he was left over night on his own he would get into a stew.
Go and find a nice old brood mare or youngster, a lot less trouble.
 
if you really cant find or afford to keep another pony as a companion although really this would be the ideal solution, a rescue or someone with an oldy? -

then get a sheep (or 2 ) or a goat. this can work very well.

Goodluck.
 
The solution is as everyone has said simple there are hundreds of horses and ponies who need homes and a job as a companion just get on it and find one.
 
If your livery isn't psychic how was she to know you were expecting them to do your horse?

Charities are overflowing with nice companions, why not loan one of them.
 
It may well be good manners, but horses are an expensive hobby & there to be enjoyed. I do have two, & on a farm with a few others. But last year, for various reasons involving illness, restricted grazing etc it ended up being my two & one other for a few weeks out 24/7. Of course I always put the other in his box when we rode but I got annoyed at being made to feel I was somehow in the wrong. Lots of tutting about him having to stay in for hours, how she hadn't budgeted for hay & bedding, having to muck out etc. Arsey replies whenever I texted to say we'd be riding.
 
Did you know some charities pay the annual costs like vaccs and worming etc for unridden companions on loan? The blue cross does it so that might help you.

Otherwise preloved, or heaven forbid dragon driving will have plenty of sad looking little companions for you, easily under 100 quid.

I do sympathise but I don't think they could have been expected to bring your chap in if you didn't ask! Most people don't like others messing with their horses it looks insulting.

You could still advertise for a livery anyway if you still want one that is, pony probably won't take up too much space!
 
littlelegs said:
It may well be good manners, but horses are an expensive hobby & there to be enjoyed. I do have two, & on a farm with a few others. But last year, for various reasons involving illness, restricted grazing etc it ended up being my two & one other for a few weeks out 24/7. Of course I always put the other in his box when we rode but I got annoyed at being made to feel I was somehow in the wrong. Lots of tutting about him having to stay in for hours, how she hadn't budgeted for hay & bedding, having to muck out etc. Arsey replies whenever I texted to say we'd be riding.
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Sympathise with this. A lot of us have been in that situation. While I put myself out as much a possible for other people, one of the reasons I have the expense and work of at least two horse's, is so I don't have to worry about having a horse stressing if left alone.
 
I'm sorry but I'm with some of the other posters

It is their pony, for them to do with as they please. You horse is your responsibility. If someone I shared a yard with left their horse out with no rug on, I would presume that was what they wanted doing with it that night, even if it was unusual in their routine.

I would not be happy about being beholden to another horse owner's regime.
 
Yes, I totally agree my horse is my responsibility but both pony and horse come in every night. we have taken it for granted that whoever brings in first, rugs up and feeds the other- this particular night I could not bring mine in as their pony was in their garden.
I have no right to go in their garden and bring their pony back up to my yard.
I expected them to put to bed as we have shared the responsibility over the last three years
Never ever have I expected them to not do what they want with their own pony.
My TB is fine left all day on his own when they are out at PC. He is stressed when he knows the pony is just over the fence.
I have given them subsidised livery ever since my old horse died of cancer as they kept their pony on a normal sized garden and plead poverty all the time!
I gave them every single horsey item I owned inc rugs, tack, stable, field equipment until I felt ready to get another horse- items they still have and still use even though I have had to replace these items for my TB.
The husband has removed my post and rail fencing to make a gate through to their garden.
Removed all my self filling ballcocks from my three paddocks. So we now have to turn the tap and hose on and wait for them to fill!
Overflown said water troughs numerous times even though we are water metered!
Thrown out perfectly good electric energizers and batteries,because he thinks they are cruel!
Removed my robinsons rug rails from the stables and hung drain pipes from the ceiling to hang their ponies rugs up to dry.
Helped himself to my feed, hay and bedding when in dire straits
All without my permission!!! NEVER a cross word has come from me!
What a bad neighbour I have been!
 
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alison247 said:
Yes, I totally agree my horse is my responsibility but both pony and horse come in every night. we have taken it for granted that whoever brings in first, rugs up and feeds the other- this particular night I could not bring mine in as their pony was in their garden.
I have no right to go in their garden and bring their pony back up to my yard.
I expected them to put to bed as we have shared the responsibility over the last three years
Never ever have I expected them to not do what they want with their own pony.
My TB is fine left all day on his own when they are out at PC. He is stressed when he knows the pony is just over the fence.
I have given them subsidised livery ever since my old horse died of cancer as they kept their pony on a normal sized garden and plead poverty all the time!
I gave them every single horsey item I owned inc rugs, tack, stable, field equipment until I felt ready to get another horse- items they still have and still use even though I have had to replace these items for my TB.
The husband has removed my post and rail fencing to make a gate through to their garden.
Removed all my self filling ballcocks from my three paddocks. So we now have to turn the tap and hose on and wait for them to fill!
Overflown said water troughs numerous times even though we are water metered!
Thrown out perfectly good electric energizers and batteries,because he thinks they are cruel!
Removed my robinsons rug rails from the stables and hung drain pipes from the ceiling to hang their ponies rugs up to dry.
Helped himself to my feed, hay and bedding when in dire straits
All without my permission!!! NEVER a cross word has come from me!
What a bad neighbour I have been!
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Had you stated all of that in your first post, you may have got a more sympathetic response.

Now I can understand why you are peeved but if I went out for the night and couldn't bring my horse in I would either rug it for a night outside, or text the other person to double check before going out. Regardless of what is 'usually' done. Always best to never take anything for granted. Nonetheless, you can't stop people doing what they want to with their horses. Just make sure you ask for all your stuff back before they leave!
 
Thanks EMS but I didn't want my post to be a bitching post hence saying:-

Many times over those three years I have had to bite my tongue about things they have done, for fear of upsetting the neighbours as we all need to live alongside each other in harmony!

I feel a mug! Am slightly scared to get another livery- fryingpan into the fire and all that!
I really dont want another horse but would love someone to hack out with!
 
Yeah ... but you know we all jump on the band wagon if we don't get details! chuckle.

I'm sure another livery could be handled differently ... esp if you have a clear contract in place that covers what said livery can't do to your yard. :D

Good luck either way and hope you manage to get your stuff back.

x
 
Alison247, I have a lot of sympathy with what you've said.

I think a some of the posters are on big or bigger yards, where things are pretty selfish. You pay your money, look after (or not) your own horse, keep your head down, and don't interact with anybody else unless it suits you.

Your arrangement sounds to have been a private home, with one pony sharing. Yes, you charged them £15 p.w. - and why not. It's your grass the pony's eating (when it's not mowing their lawn - strange idea), your stables, your equipment that they obviously haven't respected, etc. This is the type of establishment I run, so I know! The horses we have here are not considered 'on a yard' - heaven forbid. They are at a private residence, the horses and their owners are treated as family, and we all behave as you would have wished your neighbour to behave.

We look out for each others' horses, and as it is my property I naturally take a huge amount of responsibility for my liveries' horses. But we act as a civilised family, and nobody would dream of doing something which might upset one of the other horses without contacting each other. As it happens, my horse couldn't care less who is there or not, so long as she has the green stuff in front of her, but 2 of the other horses cannot be left alone. The other liveries appreciate this, and the situation never arises.

There are also things called texting, email and telephone. We are all in constant touch; no horse would ever be left unrugged, or out, or uncomfortable. A quick call sorts that all out, and we treat ech others' horses as though they were our own in that respect.

I think you're actually well rid of your neighbour. Just make sure they close up that gap in the fence! And get your tack back! I think you will find another sharer more easily than you think.
 
Rose Folly said:
Alison247, I have a lot of sympathy with what you've said.

I think a some of the posters are on big or bigger yards, where things are pretty selfish. You pay your money, look after (or not) your own horse, keep your head down, and don't interact with anybody else unless it suits you.

Your arrangement sounds to have been a private home, with one pony sharing. Yes, you charged them £15 p.w. - and why not. It's your grass the pony's eating (when it's not mowing their lawn - strange idea), your stables, your equipment that they obviously haven't respected, etc. This is the type of establishment I run, so I know! The horses we have here are not considered 'on a yard' - heaven forbid. They are at a private residence, the horses and their owners are treated as family, and we all behave as you would have wished your neighbour to behave.

We look out for each others' horses, and as it is my property I naturally take a huge amount of responsibility for my liveries' horses. But we act as a civilised family, and nobody would dream of doing something which might upset one of the other horses without contacting each other. As it happens, my horse couldn't care less who is there or not, so long as she has the green stuff in front of her, but 2 of the other horses cannot be left alone. The other liveries appreciate this, and the situation never arises.

There are also things called texting, email and telephone. We are all in constant touch; no horse would ever be left unrugged, or out, or uncomfortable. A quick call sorts that all out, and we treat ech others' horses as though they were our own in that respect.

I think you're actually well rid of your neighbour. Just make sure they close up that gap in the fence! And get your tack back! I think you will find another sharer more easily than you think.
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Erm, excuse me ? Bigger yards where things are pretty selfish ? I take exception to that. having been on big, small and private yards, Selfishness is a personal trait that has nothing to do with the size of the yard.

OP 's relationship has broken down with her neighbours. There seems to be a reluctance to communicate which as been replaced by simmering resentment and feeling hard done by.

Her catalogue of grievences have come about over time and yet, she did not speak about her concerns.
They paid their livery and provided a companion for her horse and I suspect helped out when OP was away or ill. The deal was mutual.
Now after 3 years its broken down with the OP's rant about all her neighbours faults. I suspect her neighbour would have a list of grievences too.

OP, get a companion for your horse and organise a groom for when you need help.
 
Oh for gods sake everyone, OP came on here for a rant, we all do it. I am guessing these people wanted to move anyway and were spoiling for a fight because they didn't want to say so. Might be the kids want to be on a yard with other kids.

OP I stand by my first suggestion, get on freeads, facebook and the local tack shop. There are people around who would love your set up, especially in the current financial climate.

Say its urgent for next week, waive their first months livery so they dont have to worry about paying notice at their current place.

If you find the right person it might be that you enjoy your horse more. I know its lonely on your own.

And make sure you dont have room if the ungrateful ***** want to come back :D :D
 
The best solution is to have three horses. Your ridden horse, a small companion pony which you own and can do with as you please and a livery to hack out with. If you advertise at local tack shops, etc it should be possible to find a livery but if you are ever left in the lurch again you have the small pony to keep your horse company.
 
I had this type of arrangement with a neighbour and it worked well for five years, with a few little niggles a long the way. Texting was a very important line of communication re rugs, owners going out early for the evening etc.

Our relationship broke down over the livery's horse behaving like a hooligan. I had just had enough of my son's pony being attacked and the fences being jumped regularly, and the owner often finding it amusing! I'm afraid one day I totally lost it and they gave notice, but a month.

TBH, it was a difficult month, as the relationship was very strained, and I had previously considered them as friends. You may be glad it's only a week in your case, as it will soon all be over.

I loved having the yard to myself again, but will admit I missed the convenience of having the flexibility of the livery helping out if I needed the horses getting in early, and holiday cover especially. Not to mention the extra cash!

What I did miss was someone to ride out with and the horsey banter. I also lost a friend and it has been difficult living in a small community in close proximity. However, I had two horses, so not quite the same problem as you. I wouldn't take on another livery in a hurry though!
 
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