Ned Diary - Confidence Buiding

Shantara

Shantara

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Hi guys!

I almost - ALMOST chickened out today and didn't do anything with Ned.
I didn't ride him, but I decided to take him for a walk instead :)

We only went for a small walk, but I felt (as a few of you suggested) baby-steps where you always end on a good note! And we certainly did that today :)
He was a little spooky to start off with, especially since he saw the 3 alien donks :O
I almost got on him, but decided not to after a lady said she'd lost her dog in the hedge and he may come bursting out at any second...
Didn't end up seeing the dog, but I felt it was a good call.

On the way back, I thought I'd test him a little. I threw his rope over his neck and walked with his like that for a bit. I then stopped and he stopped. I then jogged off and he trotted after me and stopped as soon as I did :D I wouldn't have done it, if I thought he would go anywhere but his field if something happened. He even turned AWAY from home and walked with me when I turned!!

Thumbs way way up for good ol' Mr. Ned!
I'm going to try and take him for a walk again tomorrow - I have an interview in the afternoon and don't want to risk falling off!
 
Didn't want to read and run. Well done you - keep your goals achievable, so that you don't set yourself up for disappointment.

Good call for tomorrow. Perhaps try a different walk?
 
Well done :) baby steps are such a good plan- sometimes the only thing I did when my confidence was shot was get on then off again. Better than nothing and I was soon ready to do more.
I love long reining and for months I did it prior to getting on- now if I'm having a bad day it is my fall back. Keep up the good work :)
 
Fab, I was wondering when this thread would appear. God call re: the dog, no point setting yourself up to fail. Here's to another success tomorrow.
 
Don't know whether it lmught help but thought I'd share something that really helped me when I had a terrible confidence dip. My fab instructor made me write down 10 positive things every time I rode my horse. Just tiny little things that I had done well or dealt with. She got me to put it on the fridge so it was in my face all the time. I replaced it with the new one after every ride. Seeing the positive things get 'bigger' really increased my confidence and helped loads.

Another idea she gave me was to write down a few tiny goals for each riding session and highlight them off if I achieved them, then stick that on the fridge too. Seeing the list of green highlighter lines made me feel much more positive and like I was moving forward!

I really wish you good luck. I totally agree with the 'baby steps' comments. It sounds like a cliche but, if you keep plugging away at it, it really does just take time and then, one day, you'll look back and think, "6 months ago, there's no way I would've dared do this."
 
Baby steps are the key!

I don't know if you read any of my Facebook posts, but I'm in a similar place with one of my horses, and we're still on baby steps, doing easy walk and trot rides, whilst the others at my yard who were at the same stage as me over summer are now off galloping, jumping and doing fun rides. But you know what? My journey is about me and my horse, no-one else's. Keep at the baby steps, one day you'll be running x
 
Thanks everyone!! Good idea Fiona! I am going to get a diary soon and I'll make sure I write stuff like that down :)

JenJ - I have a similar "problem" with my friends (although I am pleased for them) I'm still working hard with Ned, but they're starting to compete or whatever...it's annoying when people say things like "Why don't you work on a dressage test? Can you not enter that show? Why aren't you competing him?" well, because that's not what I'm all about!
I'd rather take it slow and have fun! That and I can do a lot of stuff with Ned, that others can't do with theirs ^^
 
I got back on!

Went for a little walk with Mum :) He was so good! He napped a little, but nothing horrific.
Feeling very slightly braver, but certainly not cured yet.

He sounded magical, I put jingly bells on his breastplate and tinsel :D

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Aw, chan. That's so good. I missed the fact somewhere in here, that your confidence was gone. What happened, as last time I heard you were doing well at the job with him.
Fiona's diary idea is really good,especially if you have a step back, as you can look to see how far you have come.
Is the new yard working out well, too? And new job?
 
I'm not sure what happened :( he hasn't actually done anything bad. Sure, he's a little nappy at the moment, but apart from a few little rears, it's nothing terrible.
New yard is amazing :) he settled in the field perfectly! New job is not going well, but I think I have another one! Just waiting for a phone call! :D
 
Another big step forward today!

Went up to the yard to go for a walk with my parents, but another lady was there and we got talking as we were both tacking up. She offered if I wanted to go with her and her pony and my parents were ok with going on their own walk, so off we went! Ned was an absolute STAR to get on! Anyone who remembers, will know that I once spent almost an hour trying to get on him on several occasions. He stood like a rock and waited for me to get on :) so very proud!
He was a little nappy coming out of the yard, but as soon as the other horse took a step in front, he followed :)
We had a little trot and canter and he was sooo well behaved! The woman we went with was lovely, really talkative and friendly! Lovely horse too ^^

However, when we got back another horse took offence to his jingle bells and they were spooking each other, so I opted to take Ned away and threw him out naked to avoid an unpleasant situation.
So, I went back to get his rugs and rug him in the field. Again, he showed how good he really can be :) The 3 other horses were dashing about, frightened of the rugs flapping in the wind, but Ned stood still and waited for me to put both his rugs on, while the others showed me their best extended trot :P

So happy and really buzzing now!
 
Great to see you are having fun rather than forcing yourself to do something you're not ready for. Groundwork at liberty is alot of fun and really bonds you.
 
Thanks guys :D

Ground work is a huge thing for Ned and I, he can still be a git on the ground, but he's improved SO much. It mostly comes from me releasing my inner child and dressing him up and making him do silly things, rather than actual concentrated work :P Not many horses would agree to fairy lights on their face haha!
 
We went out on another hack today :D
Went with the same lady as last time, joined with another lady :)
Neddy was so well behaved! He stood nicely to be tacked up, stood to let me on and waited very well for them to get on too :)
We did lots of trotting and a couple of little canters :D He got a little strong on the last canter, but it was uphill and towards home. He wasn't uncontrollable at all, I just had to check him a few times to make sure he was listening.
He even led on the way home, I didn't even have to ask!!
He stood very well after the ride too and let me wash/brush him off and plodded back to the field for a little roll :) Ahh I'm so pleased with him!

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He was also really good the other day, when I took him for an in-hand walk down to the river :) I didn't have to put the rope on the bit ring for the entire time!

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I honestly adore your posts! I can relate to you so much, hacking is mu downfall. I love hacking but my confidence out is not good at all. What advice could you give to me? I would love to be progressing like you are. Please keep us all updated! ��
 
I've owned Ned for 2 years (on the 12th was out 2 year mark!) and I used to have all the confidence in the world. I would jump XC jumps, show jump, hack anywhere, hunt and handle his nonsense without much worry...

But about a month ago, I barely felt confident to even sit on him. Even though I still loved him as much as I ever did, I didn't want to ride. I tried to hide it for a bit, saying I was tired, or he doesn't like the rain and stupid things like that.
I posted on here and got some fab advice and kind words and now I'm slowly getting it back again :) I'm taking him for in-hand walks, which he loves, riding out with my parents on foot and going out with people from the yard! It feels great :D


ETA: Aw, thank you! No tips as such, but maybe have a look at my "No confidence" thread, loads of good advice there. I personally find it helps if you go out with someone who wants to do little trots and canters and will listen if you want to stop. There is NOTHING I hate more than people who just gallop off with not a word, or people who set horses off on purpose. I've worked too hard with Ned to have him ruined by such idiots (haha, can you tell I'm a little bitter from an experience a few months back?) I find having a good chat while you trot is nice!
 
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A little Christmas Eve update!

Yesterday I took Ned out for a walk, as we didn't have time for tacking up and all that jazz. So my Mum, Brother, Ned and I all set out for a wander. He was a saint :) Didn't put a foot wrong! I even had a cheeky sit on, on the way home.
Although it was possibly a bit silly, when I was sitting on, I decided to let go on the reins, just for a moment. I think it's good for me, to show that he is a good boy and he's not going to do anything nasty. Well, I wasn't disappointed :) He didn't do anything! He just kept soldiering on, at a steady walk.
He was heading towards home, in a huge open field, with the wind blowing up his bum!
Both Ned and my confidence are coming on leaps and bounds!

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Fast forward to today and I decided to actually ride him, since we had a little more time and he was so fabulous yesterday.
I brought him into the yard - he was perfect and stood still while I tacked him up. He stood still while I got on and while Mum talked to YO, he walked calmly out of the yard and even walked past his field :D
He stood nicely while I opened the gate, then walked around and let me shut it again, though I let Mum do the other gate as it swings horribly with a nasty catch on it.
We wandered along the field, to the other side, then turned for home. I walked a little way and then thought he felt good enough for a small trot so off we went! He left my parents and trit trotted along at such a steady pace, after trotting for a little way, I asked for canter and he did his best "Ned" canter, so steady and not at all strong! I sat back down and he slowed to a trot, then a walk and I turned back to meet my parents.
He was a star all the way home and stood at the yard and ate his dinner.

I'm so so proud of my little horse :) He really didn't do a single thing wrong today! Compared to a few weeks ago when I was having so many arguments with him...
For those who've followed me for a while...can you really believe this is the same horse?! Remember my thread where I couldn't even get him out of the yard? Grinning from ear to ear :D

Doing the gate like a pro
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