Need a horsey shoulder to cry on

little_critter

little_critter

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I'm so down. My mare is really challenging me, if it's not planting then it's putting the minimum effort possible in. I tried jumping in the paddock this evening as a change from schooling but she just doesn't put any effort in. After a warm up and 10 mins jumping I'm dripping with sweat and we've had several arguments. She plods up to the jump, hauls herself over it then grinds to a ploddy walk on the other side. I just can't get her going. I just want a session where things go ok and we dont have a row. At the moment nearly every session ends with me in tears of frustration. I love her to pieces and she is lovely to handle but we just end up arguing when I ride.
Before anyone says, all checks have been done and the vet was out the other week to check it's not physical.
I just want my pony to work with me now and again.
 
How old is your horse?

Maybe a short amount of time off followed by being a little forceful and going for a few gallops and getting her in front of you may be of some help :)

When I have some lazy horses I tend to give them breaks and go for a few good gallops, works wonders :)
 
what sort of horse is your mare ?? Please don't give up - believe me, I was there with my last horse, an ex-trekker who thought it was a total insult to ask him to do anything at all. Honestly, it was awful, but I took it as a challenge. Couldn't afford anything else tbh.

I could go into the ins and outs, no problem, but can you be more specific with your problems - napping (lazy in the school IS napping), walk, trot, canter, jumps, have you tried spurs/whip/Instructor.

So many questions, but i promise you it can be sorted, just takes a bit of time xxx
 
I've been more than 'a little forceful' already. That's why I get so upset because it feels like I'm beating her up every session. I try to take her out for a blast but she doesn't really go on her own and it's hard to fond others to go for a gallop.
 
I am no expert, but my sons was like this,but she was totally different horse out on a farm ride, so responsive, same on the beach, have you tried her in a different environment ?
 
Shysmum, the problems are: planting in the school and on hacks - some days better than others. When we do get going I end up doing more work than her as she doesn't do anything she really doesn't have to. Have tried whip and spurs but have tried to wean myself of them a bit due to overuse when we argue. I do have an instructor and she gave her a demo of a full 45 minutes of planting the other month. It's just in between we dont seem to be getting anywhere.
 
Hey (((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))) - I think several of us understand what you are going thru ;) It just feels that no matter what you do, you are knackered and the horse is just saying "up yours". Indi reared and bucked rather than do anything at all to start with.

Ok, so here is a basic list of what I did with Indi - ALWAYS with someone with you;

1) really long spurs (a secret from the horse to start with) - I mean 3 inches or so. Rounded POW (god knows from where, lol)

2) schooling whip

3) friend with lunge whip behind

4) use usual aids, then harder, then a tap with the whip, then harder- then if no response shout "GET ON" and use the spurs...only needed really telling him once. And use that energy and your legs to keep it going.

5) when we tried to hack out, we used the above, plus when he tried to rear spin and nap, friend would crack the whip (not close) - and got closer if he needed it. And off we went. At this stage riddwn in a rubber pelham to help hold him (he was strong, lol).

6) You must gain your mare's absolute and total respect, and I found that by doing the above, as graduated and lightly as I could, Indi met his match. But many times I'd broken my heart over not getting him to listen to me.

7) I never used an Instructor, but that could well be the way forward. BUT tbh, the relatiuonship between you and your mare needs to gain respect, and only you two can gain that.

8) after a few months of intensive work, he behaved brilliantly, and I used him as a lead horse at a riding school I worked at. When I had to sell him, it broke my heart - i still miss him today.


I'll probably get shot down for the above, but it was the only thing I could do, short of send him back where he wasn't wanted. Hope that helps xx

This is the bad boy ;

INDISHOW.jpg
 
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we had one in college like this, non of us believed he was an ex hunter as he was so lazy in the school, but take him out of his comfort zone and he was a different horse!!
does she lunge? can you get her going on the lunge to make her work? then ride her on the lunge if you have someone who will lunge you
 
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