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EMC

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Has anybody else got to the point with their horse that they seriously consider selling them?

Over the past month I haven't really been enjoying life at the new yard and in his own way I think Fred has been trying to tell me he isn't either. He's gone from being very well mannered to getting a bit bolshy, spooky when ridden with other horses and generally not the boy I fell in love with.

He's on full livery at the minute and the facilities are due to be built (?) but seem to be taking forever which means we are limited to hacking atm with the winter on it's way.

I've also been looking into having him sent away to be schooled but think it may be out of my financial reach. I dearly love Fred and it is breaking my heart trying to decide what to do. Me and the OH are arguing over the money spent on keeping Freddy fed, shiny, on full livery and shod and the OH is saying we won't be able to have a life outside of the yard if we keep pouring money into him with training as well.

Fred is doing well but our re-training is stalling with no facilities to work on groundwork, free schooling etc. and hacking alone is still to scary to comprehend until I'm in a better state of mind.

What on earth do I do? Heart says keep him, find a yard at which we are both happy and already has facilities built, persevere and learn patience. Head says sell him to someone who can retrain him themselves, put all horsey memorabilia away and go on a long holiday with the livery money.
 
Id leave and find another yard and maybe go on DIY for a time, as a bit of one to one. Sometimes its very difficult to form a one to one with a horse, it took me at least four years to bond properly with my horse but now i have I love him to bits.
 
Yep, new yard.
Fred doesn't like it, you don't either,(even though it may be lovely, it isn't right for you) so have a look somewhere else. Once Fred is settled, everything will seem very different.
 
I would move yards, start the retraining try and save money were poss (to keep OH happy and on side :D) then find a sharer and go on a nice long relaxing holiday with the money saved! (poss selling some tack you dont need/use) :) x hug x
 
Don't give up, I know how you feel. I was on a yard I loved, but it was a 30 min drive away, expensive, and often under 3ft of snow in winter. So I moved to a yard five mins away, a new yard in a lovely location, before I went I was told within a few months there will be a 60x40 all weather surface and a cross country course starting to get built. But my horse HATED the place, she never settled and was horrible to handle. As for the facilities...well they never happened, all there was for schooling was a space 17x25 that had some poor quality sand thrown down on top of concrete or a field with grass so long it came past the horses knees!! I almost gave up, I was so unhappy and so was my girl.
Then a friend mentioned another yard that was local to us. I was unsure as I had been told the YM was scary and difficult, but we went and looked as we knew it had good facilities. She was lovely, answered all our questions, asked us loads about our horses so she could work out where they would fit into the yard. So a week later we moved (four horses between us, friends two, my girl and daughters new horse) we have our own field to share, so we have sectioned it off so some always resting. I love our stables, my daughter and I have our own little bit of yard, YM turns out for us in the morning and we do the rest. we have use of an indoor school, a huge outdoor school fantastic hacking, shows on site and YM is fab instructor as well...my girl loves it!! she is back to her old self, still capable of being a bargy old sow but generally a good girl. All our problems were solved by just moving a few miles. As for the cost, works out around the same as the DIY yard where there was no help.
 
i would move yard

Also you could save money but doing diy livery with assistance as and when needed.
Look for a yard with a trainer on site or a local one that could come to you a few days a week.
 
Hope you can work it out. Bear in mind that some times of the year horses do get more edgy. My daughters pony was sent home from the RDA on Monday, very embarrassing but whenever he is changing his coat he gets more difficut. Perhaps yours might settle in a week or two if you want to stay there, hope you can sort it out perhaps with part livery rather than DIY so that you have a bit of help and some support.
 
Been in that exact same place myself - in fact I only posted a thread in regards to "light at the end of the tunnel" yesterday. Move yards, try again with a clean slate. Worked for us :)
 
I would move :) its amazing how different a horse can be on a yard they love!

Even if you then decide it still isn't going well, you've tried!

Good luck, things always work out somehow! :) xx
 
Thank you all for your hugs and lovely replies.

I've had a big chat with the OH after many tears and decided if I sold Freddie it would break my heart (no exaggeration!!) but also my YO has really suprised me....we had a lovely chat and she said she would hate to see me lose Fred over a few little hurdles (he has jumped bigger ones after all) as we get on so well and he is the yard sweetheart, so we have come up with a plan.

Fred will be schooled by my YO three times a week (outside the school for now until it is built) and ridden/lunged the rest by me, hopefully we will see some progress with his retraining and it will give me more confidence riding him with tuition. Our goal is for me to hack him solo within a few months with no major dramas, to canter him again solo rather than in company (if not sooner) and to do a basic RtoR or working hunter class next year.

The best bit....to keep costs down she very kindly offered to school him for a cut rate if I take over the mucking out but due to my shifts she will make sure he is turned out/rugged up etc.

I knew she was a lovely lady but this has really touched me, she has no shortage of clients waiting for boxes and has more than enough work without schooling Freddie too. She reassured me about how the school will be coming along now issues with local planning busy bodies are being resolved (it is just waiting for the surface to go in!)

So...we are staying put and we'll see how things go. Hopefully Fred will enjoy being worked more and whilst we won't be saving a huge amount of money, we will be getting his retraining for considerably less than it would cost to send him away.

Lot's of hugs back to all of you xx
 
Move yards ASAP. In June 2011 I hadn't ridden for 3 months. I was on a lovely yard with great facilities, fabulous owners and staff but my horse was wired all the time.

Moved to a yard near home, she changed almost overnight. I;d warned the YO that she was wired and of course she wasn't :D Still took me a while to regain my confidence but YOs and other liveries all very supportative from day 1. They have a lovely school, hacking is great, my girl is out more often and back in a herd, I'm enjoying her again and riding her :D

Hadn't read your latest plan - hope all works out although may just be the yard doesn't suit your boy?
 
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