need to rant!! sisters!!!http://1.2.3.13/bmi/www.horseandhound.co.uk/forums/images/sm

[lincolnlady]

hi everyone sorry about this but just need to rant im so mad!! i have two sisters both older. one has just split from her fella n is getting the sympathy vote off every saying he did this that n the other (ive known this bloke since i was 2 he wouldnt of done anything she has said) also her 21 year old son has backed up what her ex has said that he hasnt done anything wrong n shes the one who was always losing the plot with him. so i am hardly on speaking terms with her because i know what a lying manipulative cow she is!!!

anyway my other sister was holding a jubilee party and my bro (who has just returned from afghan) and his wife and my two nieces were over and i asked my mum what they were upto tomoro (i asked on sat so meant yesterday sunday) and she said oh going to (we will call her sis 2) sis 2's party so i asked what party n mum explained so i text her n asked why she hadnt asked me my oh n son (her nephew) along to her party. she said because sis 1 will be there!!

so now ive only seen my bro for all of 5 mins all weekend (he went back early this morning) i would of gone to the party n not started on sis1 im not like that.

sorry if this sounds really selfish its hard to explain without going into a 3 page detail about it all. im just so mad everyone is takin sis 1s side over her exes when my nephew has even backed up what her ex has said even her own daughter who is nearly 10 has said her dad hasnt done anything wrong!! im absolutely livid n about ready to explode at both my sisters 1 for being a cow n makin out her ex is this that n the other (oh n just to add she had nothing to do with us for nearly a year n half on n off when she was still with him) now shes all over us now she is on her own n needs babysitters etc!! n sis 2 for pushin her nephew and sis out.

im in tears writing this so im sorry if it makes no sense i used to be so close to my family but now just feel like they want nothing more to do with me they only ring me when they want something from ie: babysitter/dog sitter!!

 

[benson21]

Unfortunately, thats families for you. When my sister divorced my broher in law, we, like your mum and dad, really only had my sisters side, and they are obviously going to support her. Its frustrating because my sister, like the sound of yours, can stretch the truth at times, but your brother in law will have the support of his family and friends, whereas your sister has the support of her family. Not alot you can do about it to be honest, just bite your tongue, as difficult as that is.

 

[lincolnlady]

Unfortunately, thats families for you. When my sister divorced my broher in law, we, like your mum and dad, really only had my sisters side, and they are obviously going to support her. Its frustrating because my sister, like the sound of yours, can stretch the truth at times, but your brother in law will have the support of his family and friends, whereas your sister has the support of her family. Not alot you can do about it to be honest, just bite your tongue, as difficult as that is.

thats exactly what she is like!! unfortunately he doesnt have his family around him as they live miles away hes stayed in the area so he can still see his daughter (my niece) and his step son (my nephew) my mum n dad have really been suckered in by her lies and so has my other sis n because i can see straight through her im the one bein pushed away. its fine by me if that how my sisters want to be i will never fall out with my mum n dad but could quite easily walk away from my sisters for good iv bit my tongue for many many years over my sister n what she has been up to i thik if i bite any more ill bite through it!! lmao x

 

[rhino]

so i am hardly on speaking terms with her because i know what a lying manipulative cow she is!!!
im absolutely livid n about ready to explode at both my sisters 1 for being a cow n makin out her ex is this that n the other (oh n just to add she had nothing to do with us for nearly a year n half on n off when she was still with him) now shes all over us now she is on her own n needs babysitters etc!! n sis 2 for pushin her nephew and sis out.

but could quite easily walk away from my sisters for good iv bit my tongue for many many years over my sister n what she has been up to i thik if i bite any more ill bite through it!! lmao x

If this is how you think of your sisters, then why on earth should one of them have invited you to a party, to their home?

I wouldn't invite someone who slagged me off like you have just done to a party, family or not.

Can I also point out that the only people who know what has gone on in a relationship, are the two people in it.

I feel so sorry for your parents, how awful to see your children squabbling like this.

 

[zaminda]

You can choose your friends, but you are stuck with your relatives. I had the in laws from hell, the sister sounds very like yours, and the other one wasn't much better. Hopefully your brother will be home again soon, its not much fun when they are away, and you will be able to see him again. I would be having a lot less to do with them, its what my now ex partner and I ended up doing.

 

[lincolnlady]

If this is how you think of your sisters, then why on earth should one of them have invited you to a party, to their home?

I wouldn't invite someone who slagged me off like you have just done to a party, family or not.

Can I also point out that the only people who know what has gone on in a relationship, are the two people in it.

I feel so sorry for your parents, how awful to see your children squabbling like this.

if you read my post properly!! i said i would NOT have started at a party and nor have i been slaggin them off anything ive said on here ive said to their face!!! i love my sisters but they way they have treated not only me but my parents and my son is disgusting and like i said before i havent put all the details up so you know nothing!

my sister is very good at manipulating people into feeling sorry for her shes a user n like i have also said before wanted nothing to do with us for ages but now she single (and going out partying etc) now needs us to babysit etc for her so sorry if im ''slagging'' her off but you know sod all!!!

 

[lincolnlady]

You can choose your friends, but you are stuck with your relatives. I had the in laws from hell, the sister sounds very like yours, and the other one wasn't much better. Hopefully your brother will be home again soon, its not much fun when they are away, and you will be able to see him again. I would be having a lot less to do with them, its what my now ex partner and I ended up doing.

my father in law is the worst!! he has nothing to do with my oh just because he is with me (we used to get on until he got married to a snob n we fell out) ive told him many times his dad is more than welcome here and i will go out and leave them to have father/son time but his dad wants nothing to do with him so sad

on the other point my sisters ex is like a brother to me have known him since i was 2 (now 28) and love him to bits yet hes the one whos been threatened/slagged off and made out to be the bad guy when hes done nothing wrong

 

[rhino]

if you read my post properly!! i said i would NOT have started at a party and nor have i been slaggin them off anything ive said on here ive said to their face!!! i love my sisters but they way they have treated not only me but my parents and my son is disgusting and like i said before i havent put all the details up so you know nothing!

my sister is very good at manipulating people into feeling sorry for her shes a user n like i have also said before wanted nothing to do with us for ages but now she single (and going out partying etc) now needs us to babysit etc for her so sorry if im ''slagging'' her off but you know sod all!!!

I did read your post properly thanks, although I must admit I found it rather difficult in parts. So you are happy to call your sisters lying, vindictive cows to their faces and still expect that they send you invites to parties?

I would hope any reasonable adult would manage not to 'start' at a family gathering, but if it were me I wouldn't have given you the opportunity.

It is obvious from what you have said that the tension between you and sis 1 is causing problems within the family, and unless someone decides to be the 'bigger person' I don't see how any resolution will occur.

 

[Missmac]

As someone who doesnt get along with members of her family (mum and youngest sister) i know how deeply frustrating it can be when it seems that sides are being taken.

The only advice that i can give is to try and see it from the people who are caught in the middles perspective, to rise above it and not to be drawn into squabbles (although i fail to do this on a weekly basis)

 

[lincolnlady]

I did read your post properly thanks, although I must admit I found it rather difficult in parts. So you are happy to call your sisters lying, vindictive cows to their faces and still expect that they send you invites to parties?

I would hope any reasonable adult would manage not to 'start' at a family gathering, but if it were me I wouldn't have given you the opportunity.

It is obvious from what you have said that the tension between you and sis 1 is causing problems within the family, and unless someone decides to be the 'bigger person' I don't see how any resolution will occur.

yes i am happy to call her a lying vindictive cow to her face when i have got my 21 year old nephew at my house (a full grown man!!) in floods of tears because his mother is screaming and swearing and shouting at him and my ten year old niece that they will never see their father again!! then going to my parents n sayin it is her ex doing these things!! so yes i am happy to call her a lying vindictive cow!! and worse!

i apologised in the first staement if it made no sense as i was in tears (yet again) and can hardly string two words together never mind a properly written post!! my nephew is not my ex bro in laws real son but he has brought him up from being very young and its the only dad he knows!!!

 

[lincolnlady]

As someone who doesnt get along with members of her family (mum and youngest sister) i know how deeply frustrating it can be when it seems that sides are being taken.

The only advice that i can give is to try and see it from the people who are caught in the middles perspective, to rise above it and not to be drawn into squabbles (although i fail to do this on a weekly basis)

thank you for your reply this is what i have been doing for the past 6 months or so and its getting harder and harder when i hear all the lies spilling out of her mouth!! i have never ever dragged my parents into the only time i have had a real fall out with my sis is when my nephew rang me and i could hear my sis in the background screaming like a banshee at him. yet rhino knows better im the one thats the nasty one in all this and have done nothing but cause arguments.

 

[rhino]

yet rhino knows better im the one thats the nasty one in all this and have done nothing but cause arguments.

Don't put words into my mouth please, I haven't said that or even implied it. You sister has every right not to invite someone to her house who regularly insults her - to her face or behind her back.

 

[lincolnlady]

Don't put words into my mouth please, I haven't said that or even implied it. You sister has every right not to invite someone to her house who regularly insults her - to her face or behind her back.

i havent insulted her it was my other sis that i am not speaking to and have called names!! the sis who had the party is just pretty much stuck in the middle and i said to her id never ever start at her house and she knows me better than this. it is my other sister im sooooo angry with because she has everyone feeling sorry for her yet my nephew darent tell anyone apart from me because he knows i wont repeat what he said to my parents but its getting that bad for him hes nearly having a breakdown. i am really sorry non of this is making sense im just so in the middle of my whole family and its really upsetting me knowing i might lose my sisters because one is a liar n the other is too blind sided to see whats really happening.

 

[claribella]

Families are tricky hey? It's so hard not to let it all gt you down but I would say pick your battles and learn to let some things go over your head no matter how hurt you are and also distance yourself from them if you can.

I have a brother who is a drug addict schizophrenic and from aged thirteen he's been in trouble, he's thirty now. My parents always did everything they could for him trying to help him and still do. Eventually when I had my own children I made the decision to cut himnoutof my life to protect my beautiful boys, myself and my amazing supportive hubby. Well, that started world war three and I was seen as the bad one despite explaining various incidents that have happened between my brother and I, which not only warrants him being a huge danger but also I wasn't willing to let him damage me in every way possible, any longer. It was hard but I had to put some distance between my parents and I and the injustice of it all was sometimes so hard to bare but I've come through the other side and we are talking again now and things run smoothly most of the time. They know that I won't have anything to do with him not because I am unreasonable or bitter but because I think of myself more than a doormat now and I have a family to protect. Hopefully time will help you out too.

 

[Spot_the_Risk]

Wow, settle down, this sounds like EastEnders!

Your own relationship is just fine, yes? And your relationships with parents, one sister and your brother? So just avoid the sister you have problems with. She rings up screaming? - talk calmly over her 'please call me back when you've settled down, I'm putting the phone down now', and do so. It is sad that there is family tension here, but she and her husband are grown ups, and will sort it out themselves, somehow. Leave them to it, ring your parents, sis, bro and have calm conversations with them above nothing much, DON'T bring up the subject of the other sister, and if they do, say that it's very sad, but they'll surely sort their own lives out.

I sounds like you're on the cusp of falling out with all your family members, so please take a deep breath and think clearly through the type of relationship you want to have with them all.

 

[lincolnlady]

Families are tricky hey? It's so hard not to let it all gt you down but I would say pick your battles and learn to let some things go over your head no matter how hurt you are and also distance yourself from them if you can.

I have a brother who is a drug addict schizophrenic and from aged thirteen he's been in trouble, he's thirty now. My parents always did everything they could for him trying to help him and still do. Eventually when I had my own children I made the decision to cut himnoutof my life to protect my beautiful boys, myself and my amazing supportive hubby. Well, that started world war three and I was seen as the bad one despite explaining various incidents that have happened between my brother and I, which not only warrants him being a huge danger but also I wasn't willing to let him damage me in every way possible, any longer. It was hard but I had to put some distance between my parents and I and the injustice of it all was sometimes so hard to bare but I've come through the other side and we are talking again now and things run smoothly most of the time. They know that I won't have anything to do with him not because I am unreasonable or bitter but because I think of myself more than a doormat now and I have a family to protect. Hopefully time will help you out too.

this is what i have told my mum that unless my sis starts telling the truth i will not talk to her and my mum agreed :O which actually shocked me she just said if it stops you being at each others throats im happy for you not to see her (luckily she lives about ten miles away n rarely visits my mum who lives oppisite lol) im so sorry to hear about your brother and you made the right decision for you your children and your hubby. familes are bloody hard work lol xx

 

[lincolnlady]

Wow, settle down, this sounds like EastEnders!

Your own relationship is just fine, yes? And your relationships with parents, one sister and your brother? So just avoid the sister you have problems with. She rings up screaming? - talk calmly over her 'please call me back when you've settled down, I'm putting the phone down now', and do so. It is sad that there is family tension here, but she and her husband are grown ups, and will sort it out themselves, somehow. Leave them to it, ring your parents, sis, bro and have calm conversations with them above nothing much, DON'T bring up the subject of the other sister, and if they do, say that it's very sad, but they'll surely sort their own lives out.

I sounds like you're on the cusp of falling out with all your family members, so please take a deep breath and think clearly through the type of relationship you want to have with them all.

thank you for your reply hun she wasnt screaming at me (she wouldnt bloody dare id rip her head off!!) she had been screamin n swearing at my nephew n i had told him if she starts on him ring me n i will pick him up n he can stay at mine to get out of the way sorry i didnt explain more clearly lol x