need your thoughts

summertoots

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I work at a yard I was originaly a livery at. Became close to the YM and staff and when they were short handed I lent a hand in exchange for lessons and lifts to shows ect.
Then last may I got offered a job there within school hours and weekends in exchange for training and free stabled livery.
I enjoy it most of the time, but I am finding it hard going and I know I am not as happy as I was before. When I was livery I could come and go as I wanted but now I have set hours and there are times I feel I am spreading my time to thin. I have found the winter hard as the weather closes in fast where we are and I at times have a scarey journey home on little single track roads on high routes. I am exhausted all the time at the moment and I just cant think clearly.
I also get a hard time off my family and OH who all say they think I do to much at the yard for little return and that when they do see me I am asleep within five mins of sitting down.
but I am learning so much from being there, I have good friends, and I could never have had the horse I have now if I hadnt had the free back up I have with him. During the mild/warm season I know if my OH had said he thinks I should leave I would say no straight away, but after a hard winter and him saying this in the middle of fitness work, where I am so exhausted from riding for hours every day, he's caught me at a weak moment and he has made me question if I should quit the job and go back to just livery.
So the dilema is, Do I quit the work and the training and decide my own times at the yard.and get more time with family (need to point out OH works away from home)
or
I keep the job on, get more qualifications and rectify a career I gave up years ago to have the family.
Oh this doesnt make any sence, but neither does the muddle in my head!!!!!
99% of the time I love my job, but 1 % I don't.
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It is always a dilemma when you turn a much loved hobby into a job. I decided a long time ago, to keep my horses as a hobby as when I actually worked full time with them I didn't enjoy it nearly as much and like you, was always shattered. On the other hand, we are nearly at the end of a long winter (more so for you being up in Scotland) and it is no wonder you are tired. Why don't you stick with it for the summer by which time you will probably know whether you want to work with horses full time again, or just go back to having them as a pleasurable hobby.
 
Its the winter that sorts out the wheat from the chaff. You seem to have made it through the worst, season wise, and it would be a shame to give up now. The good weather is on its way when everything is much easier and , enjoyable so why not stick it out till next winter then decide. Mairi.
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I think you always have days (and longer!) when your job gets you down. Im a vet nurse, which i love, but i also live on site and check the animals over the evening and weekends. Sometimes i get so fed up i just want to get away. Then, when ive had chance to chill out (glass of wine helps here!) i realise that i could be in a 9-5 office job that i hate!! If you love the job normally but your not getting much time at home, why not speak to YO and see if you can reduce hours as your finding it hard. You would prob find that half hour less a day would even help! Dont make a rash decision a think about what is best for you and you family. Its coming into spring too so the days wont seem so short and you might find that really helps. nobody likes cold dark days and it does get you down. Some advice ive always remembered is -

YOU WORK TO LIVE, NOT LIVE TO WORK
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I had the same problem, I got offered a job at the yard, and it was something I had always wanted to do. I had my horse there on working livery so thought, would get to spend more time with him. But I could not have been more wrong. it was a BHS riding school with 40 horses and no way near enough staff ! I slogged all day and then come the end of the day or at lunch times, the last thing I wanted to do was ride my own horse.

I like you done the winter. But I eventually decided that although I loved the job, the people, the things I had learnt but I could not carry on. I was not seeing my horse enough and was always tired on my days off.

I have since moved yards and help out for a hour or so at weekend on my yard but now have gone back to my orginal occupation and am actually enjoying my horse again.

Was a hard decision though - I am sure you will decide the right thing. But don't give it up for a man !!! LOL
 
Sounds like winter blues, you have done the hard graft, so I would (if you can) try and stick with it for a couple more months. You may feel you feel differently come the later evenings. If not reap the easy time in the summer go back to being a livery before next winter.
 
Thanks guys, you know I have to question wether this sudden return to winter has poured oil on the water my OH has sloshed around.
I cant say I dont get to work my horse as I do, he is slotted into work time every day for me, even if it is a half hour Schooling before lunch.
Your right, the worst of the winter is over, and looking back on last year I loved the spring/summer months and didnt seem nearly as tired over them. And perhaps I would be mad to leave when the fun season is almost upon us.
 
The end goals, the tution, the horse you have seem to me to make it worth while. I do think you are working very hard, but it is also giving you something concrete to work from.

Towards the end of winter we all get jaded and look forward to less work, I am counting the weeks. I have three horses and work full time and each winter, this time of year I begin to get fed up.

I think a lot depends on your health, your full time job and consideration to what is most important to you. If it just means keeping going for a few more weeks, I would advise you to dig in and keep going. For next winter, reschedule with this yard, to work the hours that suit yourself. I dont think its worth upsetting the apple cart for the sake of a few weeks.
 
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