Nerves! (long sorry)

slumdog

slumdog

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Hiya, sorry if this is in the wrong place but I need some advice. Bit of background- I used to jump regularly but quite successfully (unaff) as a teenager, then I had my son at 18 and I stopped. About 3 years ago I started jumping again (im 25 now) and I had a really bad fall at a show, anyway it turned out I was pregnant and I didn't know, and they suspected I had been carrying twins and we had lost one, because of the pregnancy I didn't get a chance to 'get back on and get on with it' as I would have done normally. I went back to riding after my son was born but although I was confidant on the flat I had totally lost my nerve jumping. So it's now 3 years down the line and after a lot of practice, I'm happily jumping at home.

But my problem is I'm completely overcome by nerves at competitions. I love jumping, all I want to do is compete even if we never do any good but my nerves are terrible. I actually make myself feel physically sick before I go in the ring and it's affecting my youngster as well. I jumped the clear round at my first bsja show on Thursday (ironically where I had the fall) and I loved it- afterwards! We had 3 down but he's just turned 5 so I was really pleased with him, but I've got the chance to go back tomorrow and do a proper class on a ticket but the thought of it is making me panic all ready. It doesn't matter how big the show is or how big the jumps are and I'm not even scared of falling off! I don't even know what I'm so scared of! Does anyone else suffer with anxiety? Have I got no chance?

Prozac anyone?! Lol!
 
Believe me you are not alone and its totally understandable. I have recently (as in started on Tues) used Jo Cooper (google her as she has a website) and so far very impressed with result....put it this way I jumped 2 clears today which haven't done for a while! Sometimes just talking about your fears helps.
 
Thank you, it really feels like I'm the only one who feels like it! Especially as the girl that I jump with jumps BN and has a very good horse and is very confidant (just my luck lol!) I'm going to have to do something, it's so strange wanting to do something that totally scares the cr*p out of me! But once I've forced myself to jump round I really enjoy it! I'll go and check out that website xx
 
Hi, I used to get awfully nervous (dizzy, feeling sick) ect. before xc but felt great afterwards.

Try and think of your nerves being a positive thing, you are not nervous because you are scared, you are nervous because you are excited. I used to repeat this to myself in xc warm up and although I still get a little nervous before setting off, I am sooo much better than I used to be.

Good luck. I got the above idea of someone else on here a few years ago and it's really worked for me but if you feel you need more help there are plenty of 'self help' books and coaches who can help you.
 
i've heard very good things about Jo Cooper and NLP.
the 'i'm not nervous, i'm excited' thing is good too.
another thing is to restrict yourself to smaller courses at shows than you are doing at home, so everything is v easy, until you are relaxed and actually desperate to do more challenging stuff.
v best of luck with it, hope you can soon go out an enjoy your competing.
 
Could you try hiring out the arean where you jump maybe? It wouldn't be a competition so hopefully you'd be cool with that and then if you'd jumped there already it might be less scary at the actual competition?

I can remember when my mum did her first PN (she's scared of show jumps for some reason) she did a perfect clear and then threw up straight afterwards! :)
 
I have used Jo Cooper too, not that impressed as she said the fee covered any follow up sessions, I rang her for follow ups & she never got back to me. The technique did work for me initially though. I have since used NLP & have noticed a real difference, much more focused & positve at shows & training at home which is showing in our results. PM me if you want more details & I can let you know who I used etc, good luck!
 
kizzywiz said:
I have used Jo Cooper too, not that impressed as she said the fee covered any follow up sessions, I rang her for follow ups & she never got back to me. The technique did work for me initially though. I have since used NLP & have noticed a real difference, much more focused & positve at shows & training at home which is showing in our results. PM me if you want more details & I can let you know who I used etc, good luck!
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I am very surprised by this to be honest as i've already had quite a few follow ups and i've only just started so I certainly feel like i'm getting my money worth! Was this recently? I think she would be quite upset to hear that someone isn't happy. Perhaps you should try calling her again. She certainly doesn't strike me as someone who wouldn't follow up on purpose. I feel like she is really committed to helping through the whole process and for however long it takes.
 
Supanova said:
I am very surprised by this to be honest as i've already had quite a few follow ups and i've only just started so I certainly feel like i'm getting my money worth! Was this recently? I think she would be quite upset to hear that someone isn't happy. Perhaps you should try calling her again. She certainly doesn't strike me as someone who wouldn't follow up on purpose. I feel like she is really committed to helping through the whole process and for however long it takes.
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Thanks for your reply, was ages, a few years ago & so yes I should probably give her the benefit of the doubt as you say she did seem committed to seeing the process through. Perhaps some personal circumstances prevented her from following up, & then I myself moved on to sports psychology with limited results, & finally NLP which has been brilliant.
 
I had 3 sessions with Jo Cooper, because like OP was petrified of jumping at competitions, fine at home or in a lesson but once on my own in ring felt terrified. Anyway, Jo was very good and I really benefited from her techniques. Although now not jumping as am 23 weeks pregnant so my boy is having a break from jumping and we'll pick it up again in the winter :)
 
I had a conversation with a friend of mine this afternoon about this very thing as her daughter gets extremely nervous at any kind of competition. As she said, the sensations of excitement and the sensations of nerves can promote similar reactions in people so she tries to get her daughter to look at the way she is feeling as excitement, which helps to reduce the paralysing sensations that come with nerves.

They've even given her a word to replace 'fear' - scave. She is SCared but she is being brAVE.

You are certainly not alone. I always put on my 'competition mask' before an event. It comes complete with blinkers that help me to concentrate on just me and my horse and zone out other things around me ;).

Good Luck :)
 
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