Nervous about sharing

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Dream2own

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I'm in the process of looking for a horse share but I'm really nervous! I'm excited at the prospect of a horse of my 'own' but as I've never owned a horse I'm scared I won't know what to do!

For example, what routine should I have? How long is acceptable to ride for and how often? These might seem like silly questions but I've only ever had lessons so don't know the 'done thing'.

I've only recently started riding again after a long break so everything is rusty!

Did anyone else feel like this before owning or sharing a horse? I'm a natural worrier which doesn't help!
 
Honestly don't worry - the owner whose horse you will be sharing should be letting you know what days you need to do and what level of excercise the horse is used to.

As it's the first time you've done this if you ask the owner to 'supervise' you for the first few times until you get into the swing of things I'm sure they'd be happy to help.
 
It will completely depend on the owner so the best thing to do is see what’s available in your area, don’t rush, and find the right situation. Some people looking to share their horses are v flexible – I don’t mind swapping days each week, for example, or whether my sharer does or doesn’t ride on her days. Other people will have different priorities depending on their situation; maybe they’re sharing to help keep their horse fit, in which case they’ll want you to ride it on your days, or perhaps to help with finances.

Either way, the most important thing I like in a sharer is honesty and upfrontness. I’d prefer to share with someone who is a worrier (even if they were novice or a rusty rider) because I know they’d be more likely to email me all the time telling me how my horse was and to let me know more rather than less! I once had a sharer who started coming up on days I hadn’t asked her to and riding, and she wouldn’t always tell me if she’d ridden or how my horse was, and that sort of thing is really annoying. Again it will depend on the person though!

Do be upfront about being a bit rusty and not having owned a horse though – it’s unlikely to put people off but will mean you get extra support.

In short, my advice: Make and stick to rules with your potential sharer (e.g. which days, what you should be doing with the horse, etc), be kind and thoughtful like remembering to clean their tack often and so on (but don’t let yourself be walked over), and get a contract. And be realistic about the sort of horse you are sharing.
 
I was super nervous when I was looking for a share but now I've found a great one so it was all worth it. If you have the horse on certain days, maybe try and mimic the owners routine if possible? I only do 2/3 days a week but I tend to ride on all my days unless the weather is terrible. I only hack so sometimes I'll just do a short hack but on nicer days I'll hack for a few hours. Owner is very happy for me to do what I want really in regards to how often and how long riding. Just warn the owner you might be rusty and I think as long as the horse is suitable to your abilities then you'll be fine!
 
Echo what everyone else has said, be honest and ask loads of questions.

I'm in exactly the same situation, got back to lessons after 15 years away but once a week wasn't enough and I missed the welfare side of things. A share came up in exchange for mucking out, grooming, jobs etc and so far its working out really well. I worried to (I hadn't tacked up since been back!) and felt like I was jumping in at the deep end but figured I could always walk away if I wasn't happy. The owner is great and taught be everything again and other liveries are lovely so I'm now relaxing into it :)

I'm guessing the owner will have something in mind regarding routine, how long to ride etc so like I say ask questions!
Good luck and keep us posted :)
 
I'd definitely be upfront and honest, no point in lying as wouldn't be helping myself!

What sort of questions would you ask to begin with?

I'm worried about going to try the horse and being completely rubbish! Sometimes my transition to canter isn't great and I'm sure nerves would make it worse!
 
Whats the horse like? Does the owner think you'd be suitable to ride him/her?
What does the owner expect from you in return? Money, jobs ect

If your happy with the answers from those then I would suggest meeting the owner and horse and then you can ask questions about routine ect.

Don't worry about your canter, if you don't feel confident cantering the share horse then don't. Get to know the horse and work upto things like that :)
 
Emmac82 said:
Whats the horse like? Does the owner think you'd be suitable to ride him/her?
What does the owner expect from you in return? Money, jobs ect

If your happy with the answers from those then I would suggest meeting the owner and horse and then you can ask questions about routine ect.

Don't worry about your canter, if you don't feel confident cantering the share horse then don't. Get to know the horse and work upto things like that :)
Click to expand...

Thanks for your reply.

I love cantering it's just my seat isn't always deep enough. That's one of the reasons I want to share though because one hour lesson a week isn't long enough to develop all these things.
 
I echo everyone's advice to just be honest :)

I've started sharing recently and have plenty of experience but it was from 10+ years ago, plus you soon realise that different yards have very different ways of doing things! If my experience is anything to go by, the owner of the horse will want to watch you catch them in the field and turn them out, put a rug on, tack up, groom, ride etc. None of that was done in a scary, critical way but she needed to be confident that I was safe to look after him on my own so it made perfect sense that she wanted to see me do all those tasks. If I wasn't sure about how she wanted something done, I asked.

Apparently if you're over 18, are reliable, sensible and have your own transport, that will go a long way towards balancing out the lack of experience - she got a lot of responses from kids to her ad and seemed delighted that I was an actual grown-up who had some idea what I was doing!

It is weird when you're fresh from a riding school to not be told what to do when you get on a horse, or to have a time frame to work to. I'm not sure if people who've had their own horses for ages realise that! You'll get used to it though :) Maybe pick a small thing to work on each time you ride (if schooling or jumping) or explore a nice hacking route? Then you can ask the owner if they have a preferred instructor that you can have some lessons with. As for timings, it may well be dictated by arena timeslots if you're on a livery yard or light levels/facilities at this time of year. I'm aiming for 30 mins twice a week in the evenings and then a longer ride at the weekends at the moment.

Don't worry about the canter either. I'm quite happily schooling in walk and trot at the moment as the indoor school at the yard is quite small. When you're ready for it, you can work on it.

PM me if you want to chat about it - I'm a fellow worrier so am happy to help if I can :D
 
If you're honest it won't be a problem at all. If I had you coming as a sharer and you'd told me all of this I would tell you just to walk and trot until you felt comfortable and only canter once you felt ready to do so. Seriously just get on and look for a horse and see how it goes!
 
Lexi - Your situation is exactly the same as mine.....was like reading my own story! Apart from I'm not able to ride during the week atm because the school isn't floodlit :-s

Dream2own - Think someone else mentioned but also consider having lessons on the share horse. I'm going to get my instructor to come down and do a few lessons with me, I find it really helpful to have someone on the ground.
 
Just some prep from the other way

As an owner questions I would be asking you are-
How long have you been riding?
Are you competent to be left alone to care for the horse, feed, muck out etc?
What contribution can you/will you make?
How many days are you looking for?
Are you happy to hack?
Do you want to go to competitions?
How far away from the yard would you be?

From your side Definitely ask for a written agreement, and probably ask if you can have lessons- their instructor perhaps or one they suggest!
 
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