Nervous riders..?

Deseado said:
I've often wondered why very nervous riders put themselves through it, and COMPLETELY agree that many, many people have the wrong horse, which is bad not only for them, but also for the poor misfortunate horse. I am in the process of trying to "save" a horse which has been through this; a very reactive, sensitive PRE which was ridden by a series of very novicey, unbalanced, grabby riders. He is terrified of the rider, his mouth, any slight movement in the saddle, and is totally spooked by everything. This is not his nature, which is calm and trusting; this has been caused by poor riding. I know his previous rider was terrified, but he has become so and may never be right because of it.
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I ride a RS horse who has similar issues and for the same reason. I went through a phase of being really worried about him and who was riding him and whether they understood his nature. So sad because under it all he still tries so hard to get it right. If it's any consolation he has improved now that he's not being ridden by total beginners. When I first rode him he was a nervous wreck so I'd spend most of the hour lesson just trying to keep him calm and stop him from rushing off. Not ideal in terms of learning to ride in some ways but he's taught me more about horsemanship than any other horse I've ridden. A few weeks ago I finally got him to do a beautiful collected canter and then extend. I cried.
I'm sure that with gentle handling and considerate respectful riding that your horse will be fine.
 
Thank you Asha. I'm not actually nervous myself but I wanted to understand what motivates people who are and what they do about it. I think I know the limits of my riding ability so don't take too many conscious risks. Horses being unpredictable I have to accept that I can't eliminate all risks and i have to learn to ride as well as I can so that I can deal with whatever they throw at me. I've had a few scary moments but so far I've not taken them with me on my next ride. So far.
I know that competitive thingy with my offspring too, lol. They know what I'm like though so I get teased about it. :rolleyes:
 
Well, I've had lessons at 5 or 6 different riding schools in my life and the instructor has always been shouty (one bordering on aggressive). I thought either it's me being so useless they can't help but shout at me, or else shouty instructors are just the norm! But either way, I am not the sort of person that responds to being ridiculed or yelled at, it just makes me even more anxious. I am not this pathetic in real life, just turn into this bundle of nerves at the stables!
 
Deseado, I know exactly what you mean. I have met several horses that are afraid of their own shadow, simply due to their experiences with riders who have conveyed their own nerves and insecurities to the horse.
Some more experienced and confident horses become naughty and dominating with such a rider while others just absorb the nerves and end up worrying about everything themselves.
 
The things I find the hardest to deal with are those that you can't control and a tripping horse is one of them!! I rode a mare that repeatedly tripped everytime I got on her and although she did her best to keep me in the saddle (including on one occassion when she ended up on her knees) I became quite afraid of riding her. She was eventually diagnosed with navicular disease and had to be retired.
 
jendie said:
The things I find the hardest to deal with are those that you can't control and a tripping horse is one of them!! I rode a mare that repeatedly tripped everytime I got on her and although she did her best to keep me in the saddle (including on one occassion when she ended up on her knees) I became quite afraid of riding her. She was eventually diagnosed with navicular disease and had to be retired.
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I don't think the mare I was riding made any effort to save me lol. I'd never ridden her before and had been in her back about 25 minutes when she fell over her own footsies. I certainly won't be riding her again. I'm sticking to the full sized ones in the hope that more travel time between saddle and ground will give me a chance to find a better part of my anatomy to break my fall with. :)
 
TrasaM said:
Thank you Asha. I'm not actually nervous myself but I wanted to understand what motivates people who are and what they do about it. I think I know the limits of my riding ability so don't take too many conscious risks. Horses being unpredictable I have to accept that I can't eliminate all risks and i have to learn to ride as well as I can so that I can deal with whatever they throw at me. I've had a few scary moments but so far I've not taken them with me on my next ride. So far.
I know that competitive thingy with my offspring too, lol. They know what I'm like though so I get teased about it. :rolleyes:
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oops, sorry about that !! what a plonker x
 
As others have said you really need the combination of the right horse and the right instructor and give yourself time and be patient. Don't expect things to be perfect.

I am a nervous rider and I have a very good pony but he is an animal so there are going to be times when he is going to have a spook or do something a bit cheeky and he not completely dope like or slow he does have some spirit and is competitive. I accept that there will be times when things will go wrong and then when they do I slowly build up my confidence with small targets and not comparing myself with others.

There is nothing wrong with being nervous of having an accident or hurting yourself it is just a way of self preservation. Nervousness before shows etc if you have a sane horse and are competent is more about pressure or looking silly etc and that is different kind of nervousness.
 
Thanks Trasam :)

re your fear/excitement point...

I think (sports related) excitement requires an element of fear...
guess that's why people bungee jump :eek:

or at least achievement is related to 'overcoming' something and one could argue doubt and fear are on the same spectrum...

I know one of the greatest buzzes I ever got was completing an affiliated BE Novice course at a local venue I knew really well...

there was one real 'bogey' fence (a poorly designed Trakehner) which had caused several people I knew to have v nasty falls and injuries over the years...
and my horse 'had a thing' about ditches (or was it me doubting him over them - we'll never know!)

although I knew the course and had competed/schooled there several times, I'd never had THAT fence included in anything I'd done there

this time they'd added a slower alternative (the fence was the penultimate one on the course)... I had obviously 'walked' both options

as I set out I asked my trainer (who was there competing several horses himself) what I should do

he said, see how the course goes, then decide what to do as you land over the previous fence...

we had one of those amazing rounds where we met everything on a stride and flew over every fence...

so, yes, I went for it
and yes, we sailed over it...

the elation and sense of achievement were IMMENSE...
I had been terrified of that jump for years...

(but note how closely his advice, my decision process etc mirror what I wrote in that Blog post)

as I often say to my riding lesson clients... riding is (fairly frequently) scary... but find a way through or around that and it is definitely worth it :)
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