New Dogs with Young Families - Thoughts?

horsey_jo

horsey_jo

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My OH is really putting the pressure on for us to get a dog.

He is a 'dog person' and came from a 'dog family' so he has some dog experience where as I am a 'cat person' from a 'cat family' and I am not very knowledgable.

I really would not mind getting a pooch - but I have a 3yo son and I am currently pregnant with no.2 due in Dec.

OH wants to get an older dog - possibly an ex-breeding dog that is used to a home environment.
I would love to get a rescue as I feel its a shame to have to 'buy' a dog when there are so many facing being pts in shelters - but then obviously are more likely to get a dog with behavioural issues.

We are totally prepared to put the time in. We are very lucky that we work 5 minutes walk from our house so we can be home at regular intervals. I know that a dog is not a house/garden ornament and need regular exercise/training/stimulus like horses do. My OH a is a keen runner and we have miles of off road trails that he likes to run. And I walk my Shetties out on lead/long rein and take my YO's dog so we can do that too.

I am just concerned as a parent about getting a new dog when I have such a young family.
Am I being over-cautious here?
We would need an older dog that is good with cats and young children and does not mind being left unattended for 3hour periods...
Does this dog exist?
Or is it like looking for that coveted perfect lead rein pony that is one in a million millions???

I dont want to put my family at unnecessary risk - nor would I want to cause any distress to the doggy.
 
If you OH is keen as well as you then re-homing a dog would be excellent.

When my children were young (6 under 10) I had RSPCA dogs.I recall the officer who did the initial home visit saying that the prospective dog, a collie X lab would love being part of our family. And he did. Kids taught him to surf in the padding pool, go down slides and play football.

Years later, my nearly 3 year old grandson's mummy died and the little lad came to live with me. He wasn't interested in animals but I got a Border Terrier and said the dog was his. The little dog oozes love and the two are inseparable. The dog needed no words and reached the child where no person could.

Choose a family friendly dog that fits in with your lifestyle, set the rules and enjoy your new addition- and congrats with the new baby-to-be.

Forgot to say, the dogs have always been fine with the cats and our free range rabbits and guineapigs.
 
Honestly? I'd wait til your new baby is a bit older. You will have your hands full and would be better until everyone is a bit older and settled before you bring another baby into the house, because, believe me, I am not a parent but a puppy certainly can be very challenging and you need eyes in the back of your head sometimes.
(Being a hypocrite, daughter of a single mother born into a house with three dogs :p)

Also, getting a rescue does not mean a dog with issues :) there are perfectly well behaved, stable dogs who find themselves homeless through no fault of their own :) however a rescued breeding dog who is likely to have been locked in a shed will find it harder and take longer to adjust to busy family life.
 
horserider said:
Years later, my nearly 3 year old grandson's mummy died and the little lad came to live with me. He wasn't interested in animals but I got a Border Terrier and said the dog was his. The little dog oozes love and the two are inseparable. The dog needed no words and reached the child where no person could.
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Oh thats so sad!

Both myself and my partner are serving military and I have though that getting a dog might be some extra stability for the children when either Mummy/Daddy have to go away for the inevtiable 4 month trip to Afghan.

Nothing like something fluffy to have a good cry into :(

Thank you. I will make sure that when we speak to the shelter/santuary that we are honest and practical about what we might bring home.
It is so easy for the heart to conquer the head in these situations and I'm not sure a husky would be suitable!
(But they are sooo fluffy aren't they!!! :) )
 
I think that if you use a reputable rescue that assesses their dogs properly and advises you accordingly you should have no problems.

We got a two year old GSD x when our daughter was four, they told us she was fine with children but had some separation anxiety issues (she had been returned a couple of times) that would need working on. They were correct! She was an absolute angel with our daughter and her friends, had the nicest nature ever :) BUT the house took a battering for a while and it took a good two years till she could be left for any length of time without being destructive!! This was in the days before crates.

My point being we got over the teething problems and were prepared to put the time in as she was so lovely with children. We had her for 15 years - she was a grand old dog.
 
CaveCanem said:
Honestly? I'd wait til your new baby is a bit older. You will have your hands full and would be better until everyone is a bit older and settled before you bring another baby into the house, because, believe me, I am not a parent but a puppy certainly can be very challenging and you need eyes in the back of your head sometimes.
(Being a hypocrite, daughter of a single mother born into a house with three dogs :p).
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I have already told OH that a puppy is out of the question. I don't feel that either of us are knowledgable enough to take on a puppy from scratch.

As I have already mentioned - I want us to be practical when viewing/choosing prospective pooches wherever they come from.

I would like to rehome from a shelter - if nothing else but for the reason that they will be there to offer advice later on should we need it where a private seller probable wont.
 
Well I was born into a house full of dogs, as were my children, but I think as you are not used to dogs it might be sensible to wait until the new baby has arrived and you have a bit of a routine sorted. Any reputable rescue will help you find the dog to fit into your situation, try not to have too fixed ideas of what you want, you might find the exact opposite is just right for you.:p
Imho there is nothing better for children than growing up with a dog in the family.:)
 
blackcob said:
http://manytearsrescue.webs.com/dogslookingforhomes.htm

CTRL + F and search for 'Ragsy'. They do exist! :)
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He's so perfect! I wish I wasn't all the way in East Anglia!

I think, instead of looking for a dog, I might contact a number of local sanctuaries with our details in the hope that they might choose us something suitable, instead of vice versa.

This shelter
http://www.heathlands.org.uk/index.php?pageid=1
is half an hour away and specialises in Collies (which my OH is a bit soft for) so I think I might start there. I am happy to wait on a list for the right pooch to come along and find us :)
 
lexiedhb said:
Just as a thought if one of you is away for 4 months, will the other have time for 2 kids, horses and a dog?
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The Shetties are shared. We do not own them sadly :( though I might steal them away if he lets me.

This is something we will have to consider but I doubt that it will have too much impact. The children will be in nursery full time and we also have the luxury of being surrounded by family. There is also a massive park, literally, right out the front of my house (I often enjoy my lunchbreaks watching rugby practice out the kicthen window ;) )

After 10 years in the air force I have learned the best way to deal with the seperation of war is to keep everyone blooming busy! Too busy for tears!
 
I wouldn't hesitate in recommending a military family for a dog, lexie - even if the owners have to disappear from time to time there's a neverending shortage of fitness-mad, homesick young blokes to come and take a dog out for a run. :)

The dogs I remember from being in army accomodation, including central London of all places, were some of the happiest and most knackered dogs I've ever known. When one bloke gets sick of throwing a tennis ball into the big tank wash pit full of water for the crazy spangle, there's thirty more to willingly take over. :p
 
A reputable rescue centre should be able to match you with the right dog, but I do just wonder whether it might not be better to wait until the new baby is a bit older. We are expecting our first baby in about 4 weeks, OH and I are totally animal mad (4 dogs, 4 horses, 1 cat at the moment), but even we said we'll stop acummulating any new pets for the next few years until we find our feet with the baby. On the other hand, you may feel a lot more confident with your second child and we're having first time parent jitters!!!
 
Thanks for all your comments.

We will think long and hard before making a commitment.
I think in a lot of ways my OH and I will be fighting to take the dog out for walks - just to get some peace from the chaos we have made for ourselves! :D

Congratulations to Booboos!

Like Blackcob said - we have mandatory fitness training twice a week and all the folks with dogs meet up in the car park to go for a mass run with their pooches! It's very cool!
 
horsey_jo said:
.......I am just concerned as a parent about getting a new dog when I have such a young family.
Am I being over-cautious here?
We would need an older dog that is good with cats and young children and does not mind being left unattended for 3hour periods...
Does this dog exist?.......
Click to expand...

Are you being over cautious? No, you're being entirely sensible.

Does such a dog exist? Most certainly they do, but most of them will be in loving homes, and will be well adjusted. The odd one will crop up at a rescue centre, but oh so many will come with inbuilt problems.

All dogs, which live with small children, have to understand that they are at the end of the queue. If your husband is the one with experience of dogs, and if he works, then when he's not present, it will be down to you to structure an environment which the dog will be comfortable in. There'll be no point telling the dog, "You wait till your dad gets home". That's not how dogs work!!

If you have no particular experience with the thinking process which canines tend to go through, then I would consider your plans, and very carefully, were I you.

I'm sorry to be so negative, but with your described reticence, and your lack of experience, and your very young family, I would worry for you.

Alec.
 
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