New horse and (human) baby

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Spendtoomuch

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Wondering if any mums can help me and if anyone has done what I am considering.
I lost my horse of a lifetime 3 years ago and for financial and personal reasons I didnt get another.
Now I have a 5 month old baby and am desperately missing having a horse and really miss competing.
I am considering getting a new horse, ideally on loan (if I can find one on loan) am I mad? Just to add that it is affordable.
 
How about starting off with a share? There's some really, really nice horses in my area that pop up on FB where the owner needs someone to ride a few times a week - then you'll get a good idea if you can fit in horse with baby.
 
I had four horse when I had my first baby! (Now have two who are my long term horses I’ve had since my teens)

As long as you have calculated it is financially ok I would say it is a great idea. You need something to enjoy that isn’t a baby!! Just work out how much commitment you want as well. Mine mostly live out and just 10 mins from home, so are easy to do even on no sleep with a poorly baby!

I’m currently away from mine due to husbands work and missing them terribly. I love my toddler and baby but I need some me time with my horses
 
I'll be honest - I have two at home, out 24/7 and still find it frustrating. I don't get enough time with them. If you have an OH or family who can baby mind plenty then it's easier. My OH is a bit begrudging after 3 years of it and family live 200 miles away. It takes me 2 hours to get everything done on days when I ride and that's grab from the field, brush off the mud and tack up just the one then turn out again after. That's a lot of time away from a baby/toddler and I feel guilty all the time for either the horses or Baby NB. Babies do have to come first...yes, me time is important but in reality horses are a pretty time consuming way of doing it.

To make like easier I'd definitely start with a share. Or full livery!
 
I couldn’t have coped without my horses when my kids were little. They were my sanity! They gave me a reason to get dressed In the mornings and get myself going. Mine lived out which made things easier but it was much harder when the kids got bigger and wanted to get about.
 
Thanks for the replies, I worry about a share because I am not sure I could do everything someone elses way and potentially follow their time schedule which may not fit with child care also really want to compete again, maybe I just need to look a share more and find one that fits.
Something to think about.
 
I would also recommend starting with a loan/share to see how you go. I guess it depends on how much support you have around you to be able to go ride etc, but i found my little one didn't do the "sleep up the yard" thing and i didn't want to permanently burden somebody with looking after a baby so riding was a struggle. I think it is doable if you have your horse on full livery or have a decent assisted diy yard, but then the cost starts escalating very quickly. There are plenty of people who need help with their horses, find one that suits you. I suspect many doors will be open if you are able to ride during the week.

I was intending to get another one now, as little person is about to start school this autumn, but then i cleared out my old horse's file over the weekend and had a great big pile of insurance papers and claim paperwork. That has made me think twice and i think i will continue to share/loan for a little while, it's a far cheaper option both money and time wise.
 
I had a horse when my eldest was born (now at Uni) and tried to do both but was torn terribly. If i was at home with my daughter i craved going to see the horse, if i was with the horse my mind was on my daughter! It was a no win situation for me. I ended up putting my horse on loan (eventually gifted him to the loaner and they had him another 12 years before they lost him to colic) and spending time with my daughter(s).

I would suggest a share or loan on assisted livery to start with. It didnt work for me, but then i worked full time as well and there just wasnt enough hours in the day to get everything done.

I had to wait 9 years before i got another horse and it was the best thing i did. I was able to spend time with my daughters and as they grew up they both got the equine bug so when i got another i was able to hack, compete and attend clinics with them.

Just do what feels right for you, i thought i would be able to do it all, but boy was i wrong! Good luck
 
If you’ve not had one for a while then I would start off with a loan just to make sure you can manage but after that go for it. I never got rid of my horses but I now have 2 young children and 2 horses, on diy livery and I work 27 hours a week. One of my horses is only 2yr old as well just to add that into the mix! I ride my other horse 4 times a week. As long as you cope time wise, find the right horse and right yard and have some support at home you will be fine
 
I had a horse before my first was born and so combined the 2. If you want it to work, you can make it work! I did sell when pregnant with the twins but that was because of my own health - I was virtually on bed-rest from 20 weeks. I bought 2 shetlands when the twins were 2. It was actually harder once they were older, less portable and more vocal about how they wanted to spend their days.
 
I have 4 horse and 2 kids but its hard i rarely ride and they are time consuming we have no family support hubby works so our only time together is at the weekend so its a bit off if i go and spend all day with he horses plus there is just not enough time in the day mine basically live out but i have ridden twice since november but when my littlest goes to school that time is mine so for now i do what i can but no pressure enjoy my girls (4yr+ 20months) and me time will come. Good luck i think if you can find something to ride that would be better a share or have lessons? there is so much more time and effort in owning and you have to go if baby has been up all night clingy teething poorly rain snow cold you have to get there that is tough with kids sometimes.
 
SEL said:
How about starting off with a share? There's some really, really nice horses in my area that pop up on FB where the owner needs someone to ride a few times a week - then you'll get a good idea if you can fit in horse with baby.
Click to expand...

One of the reasons I suggested sharing is because I was on a DIY yard with a lady who tried to do both. She used to leave the baby in the stable in its pram and sprint down to the field to turn her mare out. We obviously used to keep an eye on her daughter, but most of us were rushing around in the morning pre-work so needed to get on with our own yard work. She barely rode because our YO (quite rightly IMO) told her that she couldn't park the pram up in the outdoor while she was riding because it wasn't safe.

If you've got good childcare then its more doable IMO, but otherwise I think you'd find yourself torn between your responsibilities for both baby and horse.
 
I had ponies in 4 different places when I had my 1st. It got too much and I put one on loan, they bought her a few months later. The youngster went to play with others and I put another out on the forest. I was lucky I was able to park child in car by the field whilst I schooled during the week and weekend hubby was home. All different when they are mobile, let themselves out of the chair and lock the car!

When no.2 was on the way, I sold another 2 young ponies as I wasn't going to have time to do them properly. It is hard at times as you feel guilty for not spending time with ponies/kids. My eldest has ridden since he was 4 so we get quality time together.
 
I had my mare when I had my first baby in 2012, lived at home (saving for a house) and kept my horse at home with shetland companion. It was doable but stressful when he got to the toddler stage and wasn't as easy to contain 😂. I moved her to a yard in part livery which made life easier, however when my mat leave was over and I was back at work I didn't have a lot of time and it was kind of a blessing when she was retired in 2016 due to injury. Fast forward to 2018 and we now have my partners daughter living full time with us and I was pregnant with 2nd baby, I lost my mare in September 2018 and although devastating at the time and I do miss her very much every day deep down I know I couldnt cope now that I live away from home and only have partner for support. Like others I think you would enjoy it more if you could part loan/share or even get a couple of lessons a week to see how you go first? When you've been away from it for a while you forget how time consuming they are.
 
If you have the money then I would get a share with no duties required - most people are very understanding about kids and as long as you have a good schedule in advance and don't take the mick, there's no reason why you can't have both! :)
 
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