New yard - nothing but problems :(

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Ranyhyn

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I have almost done my first month at the new yard and its sadly been nothing but problems :(

Problem No 1.
I moved to save money. Upon arriving at the yard I was advised that the prices were going up, putting it more expensive than the yard I moved from.

Problem No 2.
Lots of overprotective mothers
You know the type. For the first week I was too scared to even put Ed into his turnout paddock because the woman next door was obsessing over her horse "getting excited" because a new horse was being turned out next to him.

Problem No 3 and final problem
After being moved into a different block last night, I got to the yard this morning to put Ed out and the owner of the horse next door came back from a ride. I say a cheerful hello and get a cold response followed by "we have a problem. Ed tried to bite my horse over the wall and my horse almost fell over and I can't risk him falling over so Im going to have a grill put up" no hello, no pleasentries - just instant PROBLEMS.

I have never had any of these problems, Ed is in fact more likely to be the bullied horse in the field and he's probably just finding his way being next to the horse for the first night. I'm sick of these issues and am going to give my notice today and move back to my old yard hopefully.

What a polava, I feel exhausted already and its 10.34 am :(
 
oh hun how horrid for you and Ed!!

I don't really have any advice only ignore them or speak to YO saying you seem to be upsetting people and don't know what to do about it.

loads of hugs! as I know how hard it can be sometimes

Can you look for yet another yard. I once moved 3 times in 5 months and have now been at current yard 4yrs (a record for me)
 
Speak to the YO and tell her that you have some problems with the girl next door - you might find that everyone has a problem with her and that might make you feel a little less alone.

Don't move straight away - give it a bit longer to settle in.

The next time this person has a go STICK UP FOR YOURSELF!

She is a bully and should be put in her place.
 
Oh no :(, nothing worse than not settling in.
I lasted a month at one yard, although it had much going for it facilities wise, some people had been there since the Ark was built and seemed to thing they had first dibs at said facilities.

I was so relieved when I left :).
 
I did actually find my voice this morning and replied
"goodness it seems like there's nothing but problems on this yard" and she replied
"well what do you mean?"
"Well I've been at my previous yard for 2 years and Ed never caused a problem once"
"Oh well I'm not lying - there were other people here"

No dear, you missed the point - I don't think you're lying, just that you are completely over-reacting, these two horses are in a field together - what are you going to do, wrap yours up in cotton wool (interestingly Ed wont walk past this horse in the field, he seems scared if anything!)
 
quirky said:
Oh no :(, nothing worse than not settling in.
I lasted a month at one yard, although it had much going for it facilities wise, some people had been there since the Ark was built and seemed to thing they had first dibs at said facilities.

I was so relieved when I left :).
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Glad to hear this happens elsewhere. I am so not a moaner, I just get on with it. At my previous yard Ed was being bitten up by another young horse who had found his feet in the herd and did I have a go at his owner, or cause a fuss? Nope. TBH it would take quite a lot, horse bickering wise to get to me act. Horses bicker, thats a fact of living in a herd. I don't see much to be gained by bemoaning every nick or tuft missing.
 
I really feel for you. Whatever happened to "horses being horses"?!

Maybe you should take her a multipack of cotton wool and leave it outside her stable ;) :D

Unfortunately I doubt you'll be able to change the other liveries (or indeed the prices) so you may well have to move. It will be unsettling for you both but as others have said, many people have moved a few times in as many months in order to find the place that suits them best. Good luck!
 
I would speak to the YO. I moved my horses just over month ago to a DIY yard. MY horse was attacked in the field by another gelding - it pinned him against the wall and just wouldn't let him move and when he did, it just attacked him again. I was really worried as it is a working farm and the farmer is pretty clueless when it comes to horses, so I didn't think I would get much sympathy. However when I mentioned it, it seemed that he was already waiting for me to say something. Bully horse was immediately evicted from field along with the owner's other horses and they were given another field for theirs. I've found my voice and if there is a problem, I speak to the farmer and although he might not necessarily sort it straight away, he does take it on board. It sounds like you might have been put next to this snotty woman because nobody else will go there. Say that you want a box somewhere else. Give it another couple of weeks if you can, but if not, and you're not happy, then consider moving. I only say give it a bit more time, because if you had asked me three weeks ago about where I am now, I would have said that I couldn't wait to move away. Now, however, apart from one of the mares now attempting to attack my mare (yes my horses are wusses!), it is great, and I am really enjoying it. If the facilities are good and there are a few people you can get on with, try to sort out the issues and it might all fall into place. Hope it works out for you.
 
I'd say your doing the right thing, if its making you unhappy, no amount of talking is going to change that, I always stick by the rule that these animals are costly and are a hobby and should be "fun" so if they are not fun, something is wrong and it needs fixing, in your case if moving back to old yard would fix it, then move back and good luck, hope you are happy again when you move.
 
Thanks guys. It's a real worry. At least I know I am always welcome at my old yard and the horse was happy there, thats a bonus.

I just want a quiet life!
 
quirky said:
Oh no :(, nothing worse than not settling in.
I lasted a month at one yard, although it had much going for it facilities wise, some people had been there since the Ark was built and seemed to thing they had first dibs at said facilities
Click to expand...

This is what the yard we are on used to be like, I was fortunate OH took his horses there first, I refused to go with my kids horses at first. OH is VERY thick skinned, just gets on does his own thing and believes horses will be horses. Alot was done quietly to make us feel uncomfortable but, now everyone comes to him for advice, and I have moved all our horses back together.

It was very hard at first, it was always our very large horses that caused the trouble, despite the fact I had been threatened and kicked at by a 15.3 in the field while leading our 18.2 + and a 17.1, horses reversed in between mine and kicked out (was ages before I ventured in the field again:eek. They would also come and sit and drink coffee watching me ride a very difficult TB then disappear in the kitchen afterwards, Iwas convinced they were gossiping about me. Then I realized they didn't actually ride, and there is no way they would sit on any of out horses.

Turning point came when another family arrived and we became good friends with them, and another couple who were 'established'

I was lucky had the support of OH, but I couldn't have stuck it on my own.

No advice sorry, but i hope it gets better for you, horses are meant to be fun, but can cause us alot of heartache:(
 
That sounds awful AB, I don't understand what some people gain from acting like that really. I just want a quiet life and a happy horse - should be simple...right??
 
Kitsune said:
And put her on UI? lol I wish!! It would be nice to have a mute button and at 9am this morning when she started whining - BIP - MUTE! :p
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When you find one I want one too!! I the last week apparently my mare has caused her neighbour to suffer from sleep deprivation & collapse, though strangely she is not sleep deprived & neither is my other pony. Cue moaning & drama from owner/mother/BF of horse until YM orders me to swap my 2 stables over, leaving me with bigger pony in smaller stable. Next, apparently I have caused an "unsightly" patch of algae by the COMMUNAL tap, after much aggravation, I find myself agreeing to clean the concrete & rig up a complicated hose effort to stop drips. All a waste of time as it is now peeing with rain. WTF!! clearly these people are deranged with nothing better to do. I think there should be special yards for moaners with no lives, & yards for people who wish to ride & care for their horses in peace.
 
I guess if you want to stay at the yard you'll need some way to communicate with these drama mamas, or perhaps given time they'll realise your horse isn't a monster and horses will be what they are. If you don't, I'd get on the phone to your old YO asap and see if you can move back in, especially as now you're not even saving money. Sorry you've had a difficult time
 
To be honest with the price hike, I don't know if I do. I'd probably rough it out for a good price, but everything ontop of being higher than a comparatively better yard - I think I'll just vote with my feet!!

That added onto a yard which has lovely turnout paddocks for new horses - adjacent to the main field - sounds lovely right?

Not right. The one I had assigned to me you had to walk through the main field with an unknown horse on a leadrope. Risk assessment anyone???
 
God I think finding a livery yard is the hardest thing!

I had never had problems with DIY yards at home or where I went to uni untill I got a bit older (25). I was at 4 different yards in a year!

Yard 1. Had been at yard for 4 years but had to move as moved in with OH and needed a yard closer to pure new house.
Yard 2. Was OK, but no-one there my age and I felt a bit lonely. It was also super duper expensive so I decided to leave.
Yard 3. Cheaper with better facilities but the most horrible women in the yard were there. I stayed there for 6 months, the only other girl my age I made best friends with (was bridesmaid at her wedding) and if it wasn't for her I doubt I would have stayed the 6 months! The bitter old women there pretty much ran the place and started bullying me since day one. I got verbally abused and was even physically pushed about once! They would be nasty about my horse and hitch about me behind my back... Couldnt wait to leave!
Yard 4. I was so desperate I went back to yard 1. However things had changed and new tenants were renting the house there, they were housing association people and they were absolute pikeys. Scared the hell out of me! I don't like some weird man hanging around trying to talk to me when I'm doing my horse so I left again.
Yard 5! I moved with my mum and a friend into a yard that was rented by a couple and they needed us to help them out financially. However turns out they didn't really like sharing and would make our lives miserable. They would tell us to shut gate and when we did they would yell at us 'why don't you leave gate open!! Your so difficult!'. They would blame us using the school as the reason they couldn't ride their horses (nothing to do with the fact that the woman was too scared to ride her horses!). They started verbally abusing my friend so we all left.
Yard 6. Is lovely!! Phew!! Have been there 6 months now and very happy.

Basically I know how horrid it is to feel unsettled at a yard. Maybe speak to the manager or yard owner but if your gut feeling says it's not working maybe you would be better off where you were :)
 
I've been on a few yards. I stayed on most for a year or more. One I left after a week as I couldn't cope with the stares and unfriendliness of the other people. They watched every move I made and as I had a new horse at the time it made me very uncomfortable and I felt we would never (the horse and I) build up a relationship as there was so much tension. None of them seemed to ride.

Jane
 
Well I have often thought I'd go up and have a ride and I'm honestly trying so hard to stay out of strife I've just thought - bugger it, and not bothered. It comes to something when you don't want to hang around because another crazy neurotic mum has gone bonkers over something else...again!!
 
Livery yards really can be at least one of the pits of hell anyway. The one my horse is on now is lovely and the more I hear about experiences like Kitsune's the more I realise we were blessed the day we found it. People do fall out from time to time and everyone has an opinion (all different!) about everything but it's relatively strife free.

Recently I went on a night out with YO and others from our old yard. The YO is a lovely person as long as you leave horses out of it. The few times the conversation came round to horses I was freshly reminded how glad I am that my horse doesn't live there anymore.
 
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