Newbie that needs help

[Katie33]

hey there,
I have been browsing on here for a while and finally thought I would post as I need advice.
I have a 16.1hh WB called Dino who is 18 years old which I have on permanent loan.
We don't do alot, to be honest he is more like a pet and to tell the truth he has scared me quite a bit when I ride him which is my reason for this post.
I just don't know what to do? I would dearly love to compete but cannot on him as I wouldn't trust him not to disappear in to the distance with me.
I have lessons on a friends cob as Dino is somewhat difficult in the school and my riding is not up to much being self taught and him being my first horse after a long break having my 3 children.
I would really miss him if I sent him back and I know the owner would be upset as she knows how happy he is but doesn't know that I don't really ride him anymore.
I really don't know what to do?
Help please

 

[piebaldsparkle]

Tough one as they do become part of the family, but horses are a huge commitment, both financially and emotionally, so if you are no longer enjoying him then send him back, and get one you can ride more. If you are happy just to have a huge, expensive field ornament (wish I'm guessing your not really, hence the post), then keep him. The whole point of loaning is that you do have the option to return to the owner (after the agreed notice period), if it's no longer working out. You also have to consider Dino, would he be happier in more regular work?? Many older horses stay healthier and are happier if they are kept ticking over, rather than left standing in a field (so it may be in his interest that another home is found).

 

[tania01]

[ QUOTE ]
Tough one as they do become part of the family, but horses are a huge commitment, both financially and emotionally, so if you are no longer enjoying him then send him back, and get one you can ride more. If you are happy just to have a huge, expensive field ornament (wish I'm guessing your not really, hence the post), then keep him. The whole point of loaning is that you do have the option to return to the owner (after the agreed notice period), if it's no longer working out. You also have to consider Dino, would he be happier in more regular work?? Many older horses stay healthier and are happier if they are kept ticking over, rather than left standing in a field (so it may be in his interest that another home is found).

[/ QUOTE ] fully agree with piebaldeaster

 

[Katie33]

You are right, I know and I do think he probably would be happier doing more work. I am being selfish but I love the whole social side of being on a yard and loan horses do not come up that often which is why I'm reluctant to let Dino go

.

 

[piebaldsparkle]

O.K. if Dino was in regular work, would he then behave better for you to ride?? How about finding a more experienced rider to share him with you (provided his owner agrees)?

 

[PeterNatt]

You clearly need a horse that you are happy to ride. Send him back - have a think and decide what you need - not what looks good and get yourself the type of horse you can't wait to jump on and ride. So many people are sadly over-horsed and scared to ride the horses they have. A waste of the horse, time and money. There is a horse out there for you it is just a matter of starting the search and finding one. My advice is to make up some wanted notices describing what you are looking for and put them up in all the local tack shops and feed merchants. Also have a word with any instructors etc and ask them to tell you if anything comes up. What you need is a horse that has the right temperament and you will happily ride.

 

[Hullabaloo]

Hello & welcom
I've been in a similar position. I had an adorable horse on loan, but he was getting on a bit and starting to have problems with arthritis. I wanted to do some jumping and competing and he was starting to struggle. It was a really hard decision, but I gave him back and found a (slightly) younger horse on loan. It was upsetting at the time, but ultimately was the best thing for both of us.
This was about 6 years ago. At the age of 27 he now has a lovely home with a Mum doing ride and lead from him and I have my own horse.
If your horse would enjoy doing more work, and you want to do more riding, maybe you are just not suited to each other. I know how hard it is, but sometimes the best thing to do is move on.

 

[Natch]

Hiya & welcome!

When you say he is difficult in the school, is it something you and an instructor could work through? i.e. if you had or if you went and found a good instructor could you get through it? usually more schooling = better behaved horse out and more confident rider

 

[Katie33]

No, not really

He has never really been schooled and at 18 I don't think it's fair to start which is why I have lessons on friends cob.

I would love a properly schooled horse, one that I can trust just like what other people on the yard have. But it feels mean giving up on him.

I would love to compete again but I think if I took him to a show I would end up being towed everywhere

 

[Toby_Zaphod]

Katie if you are determined to keep him then something has to be done so you can get the enjoyment out of him that you want. Having lessons on a friends cob is fine but not only you need lessons your horse needs them also. We had a similar problem with my horse when we first got him. He was 'difficult' to say the least, he was exhuberant, firey, & had had very little schooling. My daughter, who is the main rider, had come off ponies & we were getting concerned that if something wasn't done she would get injured. Not deliberately, as he hasn't a bad bone in his body, but 530kg of exhuberant horse can do some damage.

We found a great flatwork instructor & had regular lessons & gradually he trained my daughter & the horse. It took time but it was really worth it.

He is now under control, he's well schooled, he has won Novice Dressage competitions & he jumps Newcomers, has money on his card & is soon to be competing at Foxhunter. He is a different horse, different for the better, he's the same character but he's calmer, well balanced & a pleasure to own.

This post is a little long but I just wanted you to know that things can be done to change the situation but it does take dedication, hard work & a 'few pounds' in lessons with the right instructor, but worth every penny.