Nippiness with baby. HELP!

[prosefullstop]

As most of you know, I had a baby over a year ago. He's now thirteen-months-old, not yet walking, but very mobile and loud.

Stella has nipped him twice now, once on the side of the nose and once on the chin. The first time left a small cut and both nips were in the last two weeks. I can't discern if they were due to boisterousness, nerves or fear aggression.

As most of you know, too, Stella only has one eye, but I'm not sure this is entirely the issue, as my son was actually six feet away from her both times and directly in front. We have had a full medical done, including her other eye, no changes in routine (an hour's walk on leash AM, hour's walk off leash PM, plus fetch outdoors) and plenty of attention/commands, as previous. We live in an apartment, so we are in close quarters, but the space overall is as big as your average semi, plus we have a 20 x 30 patio.

Could it simply be that she is more skittish now that my son is older and more mobile, plus she's getting on a bit (9.5-years-old, but acts like a very young dog)? Any ideas on how to get them to gel? My son just adores dogs and, being a cautious child, has not tail-pulled, grabbed at the dog etc.

 

[Star_Chaser]

given your dog has already nipped can I suggest that you get yourself one of two things, a crate if your dog is happy to use one so that they can get some space away from your baby (obviously keep baby away!) or a decent set of gates so you can keep baby and dog apart until old enough to be able to teach about dogs.

Like you we have an older dog that really is not baby friendly she doesn't like them getting too close to her she prefers her own space. We do very careful supervision with her and my son and as he's got older she has accepted that he is here to stay.

My son helps me to give her her dinner (so sit, bowl down, release and hand feeding) its worked out for us.

 

[CAYLA]

I would source some recommended outside/local help for this one from a behaviourist.
I can tell you in general you do see this behaviour more when a child becomes more mobile.
You where there obs both times and she just ran at him? and nipped? what did you do?
Is it when he is moving (is she ok when he is still) sleeping?
In regard to the 3 behaviours you are interpruting it to be, does she display them at any other time and if so (in regard to what)?

 

[prosefullstop]

Cayla, she sort of jumped forwards both times, very suddenly, and yes, I was there both times. I immediately said "no" and put her outside.

When my nephews were young, she never put a foot wrong, and she's even been to a couple of toddler parties with no incident, but all of this was when she was fully-sighted.

It's odd. Some days my son can crawl by and she seems relaxed, while other days there's more pacing and she seems stressed by his presence and energy.

I would say that overall she seems more amped up these days, as if always raring to go. I honestly don't have the time to increase her exercise, but I think she gets plenty. Or maybe I'm wrong?

Horseloaner, we haven't used a crate since she was small. The other thing is, our apartment is very open-plan so gates don't seem an obvious solution. Is there another kind of barrier system you can use to keep child and baby apart?

Leashed and controlled by me, she is really happy to be stroked by my son, almost as if the leash calms her down and reassures her.

Edited to say: yes, she is fine when he is stationary, even while doing something like banging a block.

 

[Clodagh]

I'll be shot down for this but no way would I keep both and rehoming children is difficult. (I have dogs and children). He could be scarred for life.

 

[jodie3]

I'm with Clodagh on this, much as I love my dogs no way would I be able to keep them if they had bitten either my children or now my grandchildren in the way this dog has. Just not worth the risk imo, two bites on a child's face is two too many.

 

[Star_Chaser]

Try Lindam products you can link them together and create a safe play area for the baby. They will stretch across large spaces so you can section them both out. Certainly would not be risking them both together at the moment. Older dogs do struggle with changes and a mobile baby at their height is a major change.

I'm not one to throw out the dog with the baby water to me that wasn't an option but you have to go on your based on your own situation. Not sure I would place into rescue though might be kinder to PTS.

 

[Alec Swan]

I'll be shot down for this but no way would I keep both and rehoming children is difficult. (I have dogs and children). He could be scarred for life.

Not from here, you wont be shot at, because you're right.

When my children were small, I kept the dogs away from them. If you're expecting a large dose of "happy families", complete with the regulation house pet (the dog), then you may well be heading towards catastrophe.

Canine behaviourists? When it comes to the well being of my small child, I wouldn't give them a second thought, the child would be at the front of my mind, and the dog, at the rear.

Alec.

 

[prosefullstop]

I'll be shot down for this but no way would I keep both and rehoming children is difficult. (I have dogs and children). He could be scarred for life.

You won't be shot down. First time I was willing to give the benefit of the doubt, but the second time I instantly said re-home, but my husband is very, very unwilling. There is an outside chance that my sister-in-law could take her. Stella gets along well with her dog (and boyfriend!) and there are no plans to have children (my SIL is 43).

I've spoken to a trainer, so let's see what they say as well.

 

[CAYLA]

I sympathise with you and with your husband, until the trainer comes out and can give any input as to what he/she thinks. Would be hard without seeing it though and not something you want to ever see again. As Horserider said, you can get the extentable gates that actually allow you to half a large room (more so i America) as they use them more. Then atleast you can put one in place for safety and piece of mind until you can make a decision as to the next step.
Good luck, it must be heart breaking for you, I know how much you love little stella and obs your little baby who has to come first, but family is obs an ideal scenario as you can still see her.

 

[prosefullstop]

I sympathise with you and with your husband, until the trainer comes out and can give any input as to what he/she thinks. Would be hard without seeing it though and not something you want to ever see again. As Horserider said, you can get the extentable gates that actually allow you to half a large room (more so i America) as they use them more. Then atleast you can put one in place for safety and piece of mind until you can make a decision as to the next step.
Good luck, it must be heart breaking for you, I know how much you love little stella and obs your little baby who has to come first, but family is obs an ideal scenario as you can still see her.

I'm sat here in tears, Calya. She's more than just a dog. She was my first friend when I moved to a new country, and we'e been through so much--good and bad--over the years. Of course my little boy is my absolute priority, but it's still terribly painful even thinking about re-homing. First step is to get her checked out by another vet, then speak in depth to the trainer, and then, if necessary, install the gates or have a word with my sister-in-law, who I'm 99% sure will take her.

 

[CAYLA]

I'm sat here in tears, Calya. She's more than just a dog. She was my first friend when I moved to a new country, and we'e been through so much--good and bad--over the years. Of course my little boy is my absolute priority, but it's still terribly painful even thinking about re-homing. First step is to get her checked out by another vet, then speak in depth to the trainer, and then, if necessary, install the gates or have a word with my sister-in-law, who I'm 99% sure will take her.

Bless your heart my heart skipped a beat whe I read you post (does not do that often) but I was thinking omg (not stella) and it was
I think you did right to reprimand and send her away but the thing is either way you are always going to be on your guard now hun and its not good for you her or little one, at the same time the situation is heartbreaking. She is one HHO dog I would happily take and I feel heartly sorry for you
Take your time and think about it and let us know what the trainer suggests if anything, and safety measures for now to ease your mind. (hugs)
I know you would probably chose safely measures as a permanent measure and not let her go if it where not your family on the side lines and I dont blame you to be fair I definately see both sides and sympathise.

 

[Broodle]

I read your post this morning and have been wondering since how on earth to reply. I have no advice or wise words, but just wanted to send you a hug really. My first baby is due in a week and your post represents a nightmare scenario. I really hope you find the right solution, and really feel for you.

 

[Supertrooper]

My dog bit my nephew on the face :-( it was 200% my fault as she'd been wound up by my brothers dogs and was old at the time, my nephew ran into the back of her and she spun round and bit him. She actually only grazed his face, we took him to a+e and got him sorted.

She had always been fantastic with children and nephew was used to dogs, lived with 9 dogs! But it just shows how something can happen so quickly if the situation is right.

I was so so upset, my brother and his wife were actually fine with it. I don't have children and for the rest of her life I kept her totally away from them so she was never put in that situation again.

I'm sorry for your problem but to me she's telling you she's not happy. I hope you can rehome her to your relative xx

 

[prosefullstop]

So my sister-in-law heard about the situation and actually offered to take Stella. Stella adores my sister-in-law, like I said, plus her dog, plus they have a proper back garden.

We are going to have this lady come in to do an assessment http://www.nycvetbehavior.com/about-dr-c.html, I suppose to confirm whether or not the current situation is safe and salvageable, if dealt with differently, or whether it's best for all concerned to re-home Stella. Good news is we'd see her every other weekend.

Thanks for the input. I shall post an update as and when.

 

[Broodle]

Great that you have a plan, especially one that means whatever happens you won't lose Stella from your life. Must still be a very stressful situation for you all though - I'm so sorry

 

[CorvusCorax]

I'm another that didn't know what to say - if it were any other dog I would say once was enough but I know how much Stella means to you and what you've been through, and what with her already having one diminished sense, it may be that one of her others may be starting to leave her?

Really hoping you can reach a happy outcome at home, and if not, home with your family sounds an ideal alternative x

 

[MurphysMinder]

Another one who really doesn't know what to say knowing the bond you and Stella have. I really hope you are able to reach a solution that works for all of you.