no jumping down my throat...

mturnbull

mturnbull

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I’m not really sure how to say this as I do not want an argument just an observation I have made.

I tend to be a 'reader' on here and flit on and off from visiting the forum but over the last few weeks I have noticed some of the 'regulars' of the board who I don’t doubt have vast experience in the equine world and will also admit they aren’t 'Mr/Mrs know-it-all’s' jumping down people’s throats when they post.

Whether it to be picking on a younger member which some do need brought down a peg or too but at the same time seems unnecessary when they would benefit more from being corrected rather than the p*ss ripped out of them.

Or it may be to accuse the OP of jumping to the gun or purposely causing an argument with others in a thread because yes we all know we all think our way of looking after our horse is best (and I’m not denying that!)

I personally didn’t join this board to enjoy a good rant or argument but to talk to like-minded people, maybe show how proud I am of my four legged friend or get some advice or different opinions from those who are 'neutral'.

I don’t know if anyone has felt the same and if not I will crawl back into my corner but I just think some people should take a step back and a friendly pill!
 
Why crawl back into your corner,now that your out,have your say,just like the rest of us, why do you think we are here,because we enjoy:) and a good discussion maybe good maybe bad gets people thinking and talking.:)
 
I also agree, I am thick skinned but the newer younger posters could feel intimidated by some of the responses, when the pack attack mentality takes over, unless I am missing something.
The obvious time wasters just get off on the attention
 
I think you have a point. I love this forum and people have always been great to me (ageing numptie novice horse owner needing lots of advice) but just sometimes I do cringe.

One thing I notice is when a new poster comes on, sometimes regulars respond taking the p*** with "in" jokes, which can be very funny if you understand the reference. If you don't, they are at best confusing and rather rude and at worst upsetting.

Mostly I think people are welcomed and lots of excellent advice is given, but there are times I think people can be a bit thoughtless.
 
Echo Bravo said:
Why crawl back into your corner,now that your out,have your say,just like the rest of us, why do you think we are here,because we enjoy:) and a good discussion maybe good maybe bad gets people thinking and talking.:)
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I completely agree with a good discussion and I am up for 'discussing' all night long! I am however not up for argueing, demeaning or bullying (intentionally or unintentionally) and I believe that this is where some are crossing the line.
 
There are all sorts of threads on here so just pick the ones with the tone you like.
I am too sometimes uncomfortable when the youngsters get laid into but we are all equal on here and there is no doult that different rules seem to apply to interactions on a forum verses face to face .
however I doult it does the youngsters any harm and they do come back for more.
I also think the constraights of space and time mean that you construct opinions in a more forthright way than you would face to face.
The forum is fun there's lots of good advice given and yes silliness but surely we are allowed to be silly sometimes.
 
I agree.

I'm not very confrontational by nature - I'll stand my ground if needs be but it's not in my nature to start fights or cause upset.

However....I do enjoy reading a good argument on a thread. :D
 
There are cliques of people who act up sometimes.

There are the odd members who dislike each other troll their posts.

And there are lots of normal people who just want to share information and learn a thing or two.

It's a case of trying to look past the bad and enjoy the good.
 
Yes, that's why I shan't be posting much more about Ned. I post and ask for help and I get shot down and told I'm a bad rider. Not helpful. Since I've joined this site my confidence has hit an all time low. Granted, some people on here are lovely and I get really lovely PMs to make me feel better after a verbal lashing :) So thanks to you guys!
I don't think people get that to make your point, you don't have to be mean about it and if you do...well, you're not very good at point-making!
 
mturnbull said:
I completely agree with a good discussion and I am up for 'discussing' all night long! I am however not up for argueing, demeaning or bullying (intentionally or unintentionally) and I believe that this is where some are crossing the line.
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I agree. I've come across 'packs' like this on other forums and it really is draining. I used to get very indignant, upset and defensive for and of others sometimes, but that just draws you in...
 
mturnbull said:
I personally didn’t join this board to enjoy a good rant or argument but to talk to like-minded people, maybe show how proud I am of my four legged friend or get some advice or different opinions from those who are 'neutral'.
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I think if you post that sort of thing though, you would get a lovely response from people. In all my time posting here I have never felt that anyone has responded inappropriately to my posts. If I ask questions I have always had a great range of answers and my last 'proud mum' thread went to about 80 posts :D :D The vast majority of posters on here are lovely IME.

The problem is when someone posts and then refuses to listen to anyone else's opinions - they haven't really posted looking for opinions at all, just validation of what they already think :) There have also been a number of posts recently and their sole intention is to criticise others - well at the end of the day you do need to be able to back up your argument or people will go looking for their own 'evidence' - unfortunately it tends to be the young children/teenagers who have their own websites/videos/photos plastered everywhere. A lot of teenagers go through the 'I know everything' phase, but on here they are not talking to their friends - it is a very mixed demographic.

It really is a 'community' in here, and the more time you spend/the more you post, the more you form 'friendships', often based around the same horsey interests. What a lot of the new posters don't realise is there is a lot of history between posters - some good, some not so good. There are also a fair few 'trolls' about - ones who have been banned from the forum in the past but have returned under new names. A lot of the 'hot' threads are in response to this. Of course, some of the previous bannees add a great deal to the site :) I imagine new posters are either completely mystified or horrified at some of this. There is also a bit of banter between posters (and I know I am guilty of this) but the vast majority of it is really lighthearted.

HHO has shown time and time again that when necessary it can pull together and make a difference, either to horses or posters :D

There have been a couple of threads that have really made me wince in the last few weeks - people seem far too keen to shout 'troll' when it is a genuine, very novice new poster. There is also a lot of attention seeking at the moment.

It is half term. Hopefully it will calm down a bit :)

Yes, I could probably be seen as one of the 'old guard' and I do state my opinions clearly, some people will probably take offence at some of my posts, but at the end of the day this is a huge forum and I think the good stuff hugely outweighs the bad. :)
 
i think you have a point OP, it is always assumed that at school holidays times it is the teens and schoolkids online who cause the ructions with silly posts but this last week it seems to have been some supposedly mature posters who have got out of hand:(
 
100% with you.
I read loads on this forum, as I like to learn and know what's going on in the horse world, but I don't really say much as I'm definitely not in the 'in' crowd, and feel a bit out of place really. :o

I don't claim to be perfect ;) but there are a few members who would have got a slap if I heard them yabbering on as they do on here in real life, and a few who are so up their own botties that it's just too funny to take seriously. :o

It reminds you of a primary school playground, does it not?
 
Goldenstar said:
You are observant I never noticed till you said
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I do think the OP is a very controlling post which sends out a few messages;

'No jumping down my throat' = you are not allowed to disagree with the poster.

'I am not up for argueing, demeaning or bullying (intentionally or unintentionally)' - so if you do disagree then you are at best an 'arguer' and trying to 'demean people' or at worst a 'bully', even if your intentions were not so.

There is nothing at all wrong with a healthy debate, in my opinion - and none of us have the right to control what the others post.
S :D
 
Jackson said:
100% with you.

I don't claim to be perfect ;) but there are a few members who would have got a slap if I heard them yabbering on as they do on here in real life, and a few who are so up their own botties that it's just too funny to take seriously. :o

It reminds you of a primary school playground, does it not?
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Indeed :rolleyes:
S :(
 
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