no jumping down my throat...

Some posts remind me of this video (from 00:40) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TNL1MR5aj1w

Someone posts a thread (lioness catches something), it might go alright for a bit, but then then someone posts something which starts an argument (hyena's approach) and then it all goes down hill from there. People keep posting snide or nasty things (hyena's nip at the lioness) and maybe the OP gets a few good points in (lioness fights back) but ultimately, the OP gets chased off the thread or even off the entire forum.
 
Shilasdair said:
I do think the OP is a very controlling post which sends out a few messages;

'No jumping down my throat' = you are not allowed to disagree with the poster.

'I am not up for argueing, demeaning or bullying (intentionally or unintentionally)' - so if you do disagree then you are at best an 'arguer' and trying to 'demean people' or at worst a 'bully', even if your intentions were not so.

There is nothing at all wrong with a healthy debate, in my opinion - and none of us have the right to control what the others post.
S :D
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This isn't what I meant at all but maybe I just didn't express it correctly.

I wouldnt tell people to agree or disagree I was only pointing out my observation and if others had found this too then i was not alone or if no one else had then maybe I was getting the wrong end of the stick!

My point before was I'm up for a discussion and a debate but in personal opinion I find these different from an arguement or snide comments.
 
rhino said:
In all my time posting here I have never felt that anyone has responded inappropriately to my posts.
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Me neither. Sometimes people have taken the p*** at things I've said, but it's always been good humoured.


A couple of times I've put something which contradicts something I've said previously, or is a little hypcritical :rolleyes:. On these occasions people have thoughtfully gone to the trouble of providing me with the link to the earlier thread to point this out. :o:o



Cheers for that guys. Appreciated. :p:p
 
FionaM12 said:
Me neither. Sometimes people have taken the p*** at things I've said, but it's always been good humoured.
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Me neither. I've had criticism - some justified, some less so, but nothing I didn't anticipate when posting in the first place, and nothing that would stop me posting again or negate the excellent advice given.

And fwiw, on those occasions where I feel I have responded inappropriately to a post - either due to my sense of humour being off whack, or due to my misunderstanding their posts / intentions - I have apologised either publically or privately as appropriate.
 
dare.to.go.bare said:
I've noticed the same as I'm new on here, I was even told one of my posts was pointless about barefoot as it had all been discussed before! Obviously you arn't in their clique either OP
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There are no 'cliques'.
In forums, just as in life, it takes time to build relationships.
You also have to accept (I know it is difficult :p) that the forum existed before YOU joined.
It's sort of like accepting your parents have had sex, only worse. :D
S :D
 
Shilasdair said:
There are no 'cliques'.
In forums, just as in life, it takes time to build relationships.
You also have to accept (I know it is difficult :p) that the forum existed before YOU joined.
It's sort of like accepting your parents have had sex, only worse. :D
S :D
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MY PARENTS DID NOT HAVE SEX! :mad:
 
dare.to.go.bare said:
I've noticed the same as I'm new on here, I was even told one of my posts was pointless about barefoot as it had all been discussed before!
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If that is me, you are refering to, I actually objected to the wording of your post, which I thought was rather stiffling to debate... I did take the time to explain what I meant, though, so I don't think it's fair to deliberately misrepresent the responses you received here.
 
Either I'm completely oblivious (which is entirely possible :rolleyes: :D ) but I have never found this a cliquey place to be in the slightest - yes you get 'friendships' forming between posters (not sure why I put that in inverted commas as I would say I have found real friends here) but I have never felt one of my threads was ignored, and I've had some great advice from a wide range of people.

I guess it must be daunting for a newcomer but if you make the attempt to post - even in the chatty soapbox threads - you will soon begin to recognise posters that you have more in common with, and then you are naturally drawn to the same sort of posts. That's all it is, there is no hierarchy system, but it is too big a forum to think you will get on with everyone :)

As regards the 'pointless' post, I feel that was a tongue in cheek response but can understand your point of view. The search function on here is realy useful as the same subject comes up time and time again :)
 
rhino said:
Either I'm completely oblivious (which is entirely possible :rolleyes: :D ) but I have never found this a cliquey place to be in the slightest - yes you get 'friendships' forming between posters (not sure why I put that in inverted commas as I would say I have found real friends here) but I have never felt one of my threads was ignored, and I've had some great advice from people in the supposed 'barefoot taliban' amongst others - they have taken the time to pm me further information etc.

I guess it must be daunting for a newcomer but if you make the attempt to post - even in the chatty soapbox threads - you will soon begin to recognise posters that you have more in common with, and then you are naturally drawn to the same sort of posts. That's all it is, there is no hierarchy system, but it is too big a forum to think you will get on with everyone :)

As regards the 'pointless' post, I feel that was a tongue in cheek response but can understand your point of view. The search function on here is realy useful as the same subject comes up time and time again :)
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I don't want to seem vain, but I do feel I expressed this same point, only so much more effectively. And concisely.
S :D
 
sure some posts do go silly and that's fun and I don't recall a serious post eg someone asking for advice about lameness or an off colour horse even going silly
I think in those posts the vast majority of people try to give helpful advice and support people in not very nice situations.
And I do think the more serious posters just stay out of the post going silly thing and let the others have fun.
Some might prefer for the forum to be more serious but it's for all bit I do worry about the youngsters sometimes though when there getting a hard time.
 
Interesting OP and subsequent replies. I do think it is too easy to say some of the condescending remarks on here hiding behind a computer screen. Would you honestly say some of the things that have been said on this forum over the last few weeks if you were face to face? I doubt it. However, the vast majority on her are friendly, helpful posters that are here to discuss equestrian topics.
 
dare.to.go.bare said:
Infact your one of the worst culprits!
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I presume that is aimed at me. I am truly flattered :D


I, at least, can guarentee that I have said nothing on here that I wouldn't say to someone's face. That makes me a pig of a person to know, but it also makes me very honest - and people know that when I'm nice, I really mean it.
 
I don't at all think the OP is being 'passive aggressive' - the fact that people jump to the conclusion that she has alterior motives and is trying to 'have a dig' kind of proves her point, do you not think?
I absolutely agree with the OP. In 5 years (ok, with varying amounts of actual activity) on here, I've never felt that it is the young/inexperienced/otherwise apparently undermine-able forum users causing problems. In my opinion it's the apparently older/more experienced/sometimes self righteous forum users who seem to feel the need to assert themselves and put these forum users 'in their place'.
I strongly believe that anyone can have and say any opinion, but it is the way it is expressed that dictates whether or not people cause offence. There's nothing wrong with disagreeing! There are several H&H'ers that I hold in esteem and with respect, but whom I sometimes more often disagree with them than agree.
I also agree with rhino that people seem far too quick to accuse OPs of trollism (perhaps it's just the result of too many trollish experiences, but even so - benefit of the doubt, eh).
I love this forum dearly and love a good debate just as much. Debate that is, not massacre. ;)
 
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Have been the ripe age of 14 when I joined this forum :eek: , I was that teen who would disagree with anything I did not want to hear. Some of the things I posted riled the regular and older posters and they 'jumped down my throat'. Then, I took it very personally and got more than a bit miffed about things. At that age I read things but did not consider the different ways they could be interpreted.

Still using the forum quite a lot now, and having had people pelt me down with their words, I feel I am a lot more considerate and constructive in how I post on HHO. I also take things I read into account and consider the different outlooks of what has been said, rather than being the obnoxious little two bit cowbag that I was. :rolleyes:

Saying that, there is a line to how some things should be posted, and I too have read things and thought sometimes the response is a bit OTT.
Reading rhino's reply though, I agree wholeheartedly with what she has said. :)
 
I agree Op, hate the let's get pop corn, why post rubbish like that? i was looking at someones stats as they were putting "gets pop corn" and they had put that in over 10 posts.

And lately it's post after post just to cause trouble, why bother?
 
I think that this forum sometimes reflects the equestrian world today in terms of what we are seeing on livery yards.

For some reason in this credit cruch climate loads of people have decided that owning a horse is the latest fad, and have no idea how to go about it. I think for me this is a raw subject due to my OH horse going out on loan to some one who I actually now believe knows bla all about horses, and seems to be out to impress someone else regarding their horsemanship....or lack of. And because a 5yo has bucked and wont pick his feet up he must have a back problem, can possibly be a 5yo cob taking the P.

ANYWAY (gosh that feels better) what I am trying to say is that on here it is sometimes very hard to read threads on here started by people who have no idea or the ones that have obviously read something some where on Google and want to start a debate about it or want to look clever but discussing things that the know nothing about.

I don't have a problem with people saying "this is my first horse in 10years im rusty, im a novice again HELP" or " I am a total novice HELP" but not "Well I ride in this bit, or use this feed and therefore I am right because I have done this for a whole year! oh and because Richard Maxwell/ Monty Roberts/ Parelli do it so should YOU" (FYI I love Richard Maxwell) or "Because a fellow HHO'er said it, it must be right and I will preach for them"




And also HHO is also really good for having a good old fashioned rant :) Phew
 
mturnbull said:
I personally didn’t join this board to enjoy a good rant or argument but to talk to like-minded people, maybe show how proud I am of my four legged friend or get some advice or different opinions from those who are 'neutral'.
QUOTE]

You didn't do much research before joining did you :D :D

This forum has been described as "the dark side" in quite a few places

I personally DID join this board to enjoy a good rant and argument. The rest of it is a bonus.

I would agree that it sometimes gets a bit out of hand though and I dont like bullying.
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Shilasdair said:
No, never.
I was admiring the way that you proved your own point, within the same post. :p
Brevity for the win!
S :D
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:D

That gives rise to another point, how easy it is to misunderstand someone over the internet :D

(I was just sad that you ended your post without your grinny face. You obviously must be one of the famous ones on here, because I know you do that ;))
 
Kaylum said:
I agree Op, hate the let's get pop corn, why post rubbish like that? i was looking at someones stats as they were putting "gets pop corn" and they had put that in over 10 posts.

And lately it's post after post just to cause trouble, why bother?
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*goes to make a cup of tea* JOKE (please laugh...!)

but yes I agree with post just being made for those to argue.


Toffee44 said:
I think that this forum sometimes reflects the equestrian world today in terms of what we are seeing on livery yards.
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agreed with everything you said especially this!
 
In my opinion the forum is merely a reflection of life itself. Some people you will get long with and will click with, some people you wont, some will annoy the hell out of you, some wont and so on. I dont worry about it, I just sit there and have a laugh at some of the 'hotter' debates, it doesnt mean I want to join in, I just find some if it rather amusing.

I've only had a negative debate to one of my posts in NL, where I deliberately sat on the fence and got hounded because I would not form an opinion on one side or the other. Its my opinion, I am old enough to have a reasonably informed one, and if I dont want to agree with someone, I really dont feel the pressure to do so, so dont even try. Most of the time I get some really constructive advice, lots of help and lots of support. There really are some lovely, kind and helpful people on here.

I agree there has been some pretty silly stuff on here recently. Some I've posted on, most I ignore. There are some posters on here who I avoid like the plague. I see their threads and I may have a look, but I wont bother with responding, as I really could not care less what they do with their horses/lives etc. Some of the younger members have had a bad press recently, but to be honest some of them are so dam condescending that it makes me cringe. There's no point being rude though - Mini TX is the most vile creature under the sun at the moment, so I do understand to a degree. It wont stop me posting about her eventing though and being proud of the little be atch though.

Life is far to short to get hot under the collar about some of the subjects endlessly debated on this forum. If you want to ride a cob or a warmblood (I do both), go barefoot, feed oats, keep your horse stabled 23 hours a day, never hack, spend inordinate amounts of your hard earned cash on matchy matchy, dead sheep and bling then carry on. I dont care, it doesnt affect me personally, and if I want to comment on it I will. Its a forum, we are all free to express ourselves, sometimes we agree, sometimes we dont. Its just like real life!
 
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