no more riding!!!

[missyjet]

hi everyone

i am desperate for help!! i am 13 years old and adore ponies! mum and dad say i am not allowed one but i understand that! what i dont understand is my dad not letting me have any more lessons! i pay for them by myself but he wont let me have any more because he says "whats the point, youve got nothing to ride after" but i try to explain that when i am a bit better i can ride ponies for people becuse some people want thier ponies riding but he just doesnt understand!!! my mum does understand though and we know a lady up the road who has a pony that needs riding but i dont know what to say to the lady so i need help on persuading my dad and help on what to ask the lady!!! i am soo desperate please help and also my friend has 3 ponies and i love going and helping her at her yard except when she goes on rides i just bike along and its making me want to ride evenmore!!!so i ride a bike not a pony!!!pleeeeeeeeeeasehelp!!!

 

[AmyMay]

Quite simply you're dad should let you continue to have lessons because you:

Enjoy it
It's good physical Exercise
It's social
You get fresh air
You do not sit in front of the telly all day
You do not sit in front of a computer all day

Oooo, I could go on and on.

 

[horsegirl]

perhaps you can get your mum to sxplain to your dad that it is a hobby you enjoy and therefore there is a point to it. Don't be afraid to go an ask the women with the ponies if she wants any help. You may have to do a lot of mucking out and groom before you get to do any riding but as long as you show yourself to be hardworking and reliable I'm sure it will work out in the end, The worst she can do is say no!! Good luck

 

[missyjet]

i know but what should i say to the lady who owns the pony that needs ridng?

 

[missyjet]

thankyou but im too scared to ask though i know it sounds stupid really i will do mucking out and whatever i dont mind doing that adi hope mum willtalk to dad

 

[ruscara]

I can't help you with your immediate dilemma - I can't talk to your Dad, or talk to the lady with the pony for you. Only you can do that.
All I can say is that, with your passionate love of horses and what appears from your post to be a very mature attitude and no fear of hard work, you will be involved with them sometime in the future. Not much help now, I know. It is frustrating for you now, and I think you will have to develop a bit more courage to get what you want.

 

[missyjet]

i think all i need is the guts to go out and ask her but i dont them guts!!! thankyou everyone opne whohas helpedmeyou all have

 

[Sparklet]

Awww missyjet I know just how you feel - I wasnt allowed a pony and when my parents split up at age 13 I had to stop riding lessons too because my mum couldnt afford it any more.

I did a lot of other stuff including getting married and having a couple of kids before I went back to riding. As soon as I sat on a horse (age 30) I instantly knew I still wanted one.

Your dad may have stopped you having lessons because he knows how desperate you are for a pony and he maybe thinks it is just upsetting you, particularly if you have nagged a bit for I pony (I know I did). Try to persuade your dad to let you go back and maybe offer to help at the stables with the mucking out and leading and stuff - you often get a free ride when you help.

Do be prepared for the lady down the road to say no - there may be good reasons why it is not ridden but I am sure she would be happy to let you groom it etc.

Promise yourself you will get your own pony when you start working and everything you do before that can be preparing for ownership. Learn as much as you can about caring for them, riding them etc because it is knowledge you will need one day and then it wont all seem pointless.

Good things come to those who wait..

 

[Christmas_Kate]

just pop along to her (maybe take your friend) and knock on the door and ask her "hi, I've seen you have got ponies, and I've been riding for x amount of time, and was wondering if you would let me help out with your ponies so I can get some more experience?" honestly most horse owners would be grateful for any help and actually want to encourage keen youngsters!
Don't worry too much about your dad. I was as pony mad as you, and my dad hated horses. My mum loved them as much as me and paid for me to have lessons, but then I had to stop. I eventually got 'given' a pony to look after, on free loan. I'm now 26 and about to buy my own pony. One day you'll be able to do the same, until then read and learn as much as you can, and don't give up! Would your friend let you ride hers?

 

[riotgirl]

Tell him that if you spend time with ponies then you'll have less time to spend with boys! This worked very well for me when I was 13 and I pointed it out to my dad.

 

[missyjet]

wow thats loads of good advice that l;ast pne is funny ill try it !

kate26 i used to ride with my friend who had her own pony and one on loan so she had 2 and we used to go out onlovely hacks but i just miss it now she hasnt got the loan pony anymore. my friend has a 13hh,14.2hh and a 16.2hh . also the lady who owns the pony i would like to ride is a really good friend of ours so im sure my mum or dad will be with me when i ask so i hope it all works out im not going to stop trying otherwise i will never get that time with ponies that i would like.

 

[SSM]

Here's the reason my parents encouraged me to ride, might work on yours.

My mothers exact words were "while you're mad about horses you won't be interested in boys and I doubt whether you'd 'get into trouble' because it would get in the way of riding'!!! Sage old bird was my mother bless her!

And 34 years later I'm still horse mad (or just plain mad)!

 

[missyjet]

that lastones funny too god you lot how do you all comeup with such great thingsto say your all really helpful

 

[Sparklet]

The best bit is when there are plenty of boys where you ride

, but dont tell your dad!

 

[GTs]

WOW - some parents are lame.

 

[pixie]

agreed GTs!

I was very lucky in that even when were movig overseas and couldn't afford to ride my parents were happy for me to exercise ponies at the local stables, and when we moved to england they paid for me to go trekking once or twice a month even though they didn't have much money.

 

[Ginn]

Aww, hunny. I totally sympathise.

My Dad was exactly the same in that he wouldn't let me have a horse/pony and he wouldn't let me have lessons. This was when I was about your age too. However, my neighbour, who had horses (although not suitable for me to ride) introduced me to a friend who had 2 horses and 3 ponies. This lady was lovely. Most evenings after school and at weekends I would help her muck out all of them and them, time, light and weather depending we would all go for a ride. As I learn't more and became more able she'd take me to shows and after a year she agreed I could join the same pony club as her daughter. Whats more, doing it this way you learn far more, especially horse care and management which will be invaluable when one day you get your own.

Simply pop up and see this lady you know of with your mum. Explain that you have been having riding lessons but would like to learn more and ask if she would like a hand with stable duties. Guage her reaction from this - if she's interested suggest that you also heard that she may also be looking for someone to ride her pony and if youi mucked out for her at weekends say would you be able to join her on er pony when she hacks out. Its worth a try - at worse she'll say thankyou but she doesn't want any extra help at the moment. Let us know how it goes. Perhaps you could offer to pay for the ponies shoes too...

 

[Capriole]

im quite shy and hate asking people for things too.

try writing her a note/short letter, telling her your experience etc, and that you are willing to help out with her ponies and if possible, to ride. its easier than asking her face to face if you feel you cant, (but dont beg or use lots of exclamation marks as it looks quite mad and desperate

)