Novice riding my GP horse without permission?!

OP I think you are right to be angry and I would be more so with the YO's blase attitude once her unprofessional behaviour was discovered. I would be subtracting the money you paid for the exercising from your next bill, as i would feel that a service paid for hasn't been provided. Personally I would also be looking for a new yard, could you trust that she will now do all the exercising herself?

I am Full Livery and only the staff will exercise our horses even though there are some good riders on our yard, and some are only exercised by certain of those staff.
 
I'm sorry but I would go flooping ballistic!

The 14 year old girl comes up to you and says: 'Excuse me, I know you're potentially about to go abroad for a dressage competition, and I know I'm only a learner rider and all that, but can I take your unpredictable 17h GP dressage horse out for a hack down the road, whilst you're on holiday?'

What would your answer to the girl be? Errrrrrrm......... 'No'?

Your YO sounds a tad manipulative and more than a tad irresponsible. Even though it might mean a stop-gap yard, if it were me I would have my dream dressage horse outta there faster than you can say RTA.
 
Wow ! After reading your post two things came to mind. 1. My god how dare they do this but then reading further on I am sorry but I am going to question a few things. You have a horse on full livery and only agreed to the one person riding him which didn't happen so you have ever right to be mad but reading further on you went up to give him a love then went home to cook dinner !

Second point for me is the fact that you have something coming up ' internationally' but still went away ? We would have stayed at home and assured the status quo was kept and certainly if the horse in question was so sensitive. We too have such a sensitive horse but he isn't bound for such great heights but we would still have made sure he was ridden by our instructor if we had to go away with an important comp coming up full livery or not.

Yes the YO has a lot to answer for but perhaps so do you after all he is your GP horse and with such an important time for him and you he needed to come first. Now I am going to run for the hills but please I am looking at it all from all angles so just ask yourselves if you would have gone at such an important time. :rolleyes:
 
I've read every post and I see OP is online so I'd love to know how the meeting went today with the YO??

I'm nowhere near as volatile as some other posters on here. I would be irritated if someone had just taken one of my top-end horses out without my permission. Not that it would happen because I know all people who come onto my yard and they all know my horses and I have some that no-one in their right minds would even want to ride lol!

I can understand the young girl being thrilled about getting the ride on the horse btw. When I was a younger I was offered a ride on a well known riders PSG horse and it was one of the most exhilarating experiences of my life back then. I did it with her permission though. It's not the young girls fault for riding your horse. The YO should have known who was and who wasn't allowed to ride.

In some respects I do agree with the poster above regarding your big break coming up internationally. Maybe it would have been better for OP to either stay at home or to impress upon the YO that this is a very important time for the horse and kid gloves are necessary at this moment if the horse really is such a sponge for new riders techniques.
 
Hi all. I've been off and on reading the replies and found them all very constructive, so thank you. I went up to the yard to see my boy today and speak to the yard owner. Hubby dropped me off as I was a bit nervous!!
Was rather awkward on arrival and I didn't bring it up straight away. Rode Ernie and I can always tell when someone else has ridden him, as others have said about fine tuning, he is very finely tuned, and he was a bit more "work" today than usual. Whether that is because the girl has ridden him or not, or perhaps he's just had a bit of an off day. We finished on a good note though so no damage done. Popped him out into the paddock and went to find yard owner.
Yard owner pretty much repeated what she said before. She did tell me it only happened the once, after she'd had a long day of lessons and riding other horses (she has a few of her own). She assured me it won't happen again, but I'm no fool so will be keeping a closer eye on my boy. Have also asked another livery who I'm quite chummy with if he will keep an eye on Ernie, as he is up there more than me, to make sure there aren't anymore "slips".
I still struggle to understand WHY it happened. Even if she had decided he needed hacking that day, I don't understand why they didn't just go around their land (they have a fair amount). Well, I did ask why they didn't, response was it was quicker to go on the road. Even then a day off would have been fine. I'm wondering whether it's because I am so easy going. I would actually say we are friends.. We are both in our late twenties and obviously have a lot in common with the horses so perhaps, despite being a paying customer, she doesn't particularly see me paying her to care for my horse as 'business' so to speak.
I didn't particularly get an apology although yard owner is definitely a stubborn character! Was more a begrudging 'it won't happen again'. Im not sure whether the girl who rode him knows that I know, and that I don't approve, as only saw her mother today but we don't really speak apart from the odd hello.
With regards to those saying him being hacked more than he is now, or given time off, I have to say his routine rather suits him. He has minimum 1 day hacking and 1 day just chilling (although if weather is terrible and he can't be turned out he will go on the walker). But being a dressage horse, yes, we do a fair amount of time in the school. He lives a rather pampered lifestyle and I'm sure he wouldn't complain!
With those saying I should move, totally agree where you are all coming from, and if the yard wasn't otherwise perfect aside from this anomaly, and there were more yards round to suit him, that would be the top of my agenda. I wish he could just live at home with me but unfortunately couldn't do without an arena and I'm not sure how well he'd cope roughing it.
For the poster asking what sort of yard it is, it is a professional yard but not exclusively dressage. There's quite a mixed bunch, showjumpers, eventers, a couple of dressage riders, then just normal everyday riders who do the local shows!
for those asking about my going on holiday. It was a surprise from my hubby, a lovely one at that. Regarding our potential international debut.. Well it's fair to say I'm still dithering over it, nothing is set in stone and it wouldn't be immediate, although my trainer thinks its a brill idea!! So we will see what happens. I don't want to jinx it if I decide to just stick at where I am for the time being.
I will keep you all updated if anything is to change though. Hopefully this is the end of it but things will be taking a totally different route if it ever happens again!
 
Well, it sounds like you at least aired the situation out. I presume she is not billing you for that day, at least? ;)

Out of curiosity, your trainer is not the YO, correct? Perhaps next time you go away you could ask your trainer to ride the horse at least part of the time? Then there would be someone closer to hand with a very vested interest, making sure the horse stays on the rails.

It can be very hard to foster a good professional relationship in the horse world, especially when people are similar ages and might be friends under a different circumstance. I have to say, I'm a bit looser about it now I'm older but then I suspect that's because the balance of power has changed a bit and I'm less shy about discussions of money etc. When I was younger and had clients that were my age or much older I had to be much more consciously businesslike. I also made mistakes, misread situations and learned the hard way a few times. :). Being the client can be tough, too, but at the end of the day you ARE paying for a service and have a right to expect it. That should not cause a problem. You can be friendly without being friends! You can even, if you are careful, do business with your friends but you have to be very clear on the rules.

One thing I have learned, it's often useful to clarify by text or email. I am NOT a fan of avoiding important conversations face to face but it can be useful to have things in writing, both for the record and because it clarifies everyone's thoughts.

As you say, it doesn't seem any real damage was done. Hopefully you've scared them all enough to stay in line in the future. But don't be afraid to set limits - it is your horse, after all!

Keeping in mind this comes from someone on the other side of the equation. Your YO also has the right to not accept your limits, but that's another story and must ALWAYS be fully discussed and eventually hashed out to mutual agreement. I used to work for someone who wanted my boss and only my boss to school her horse. He said, sorry, he employed good people for a reason. Fair enough. And a loooong way from putting a random kid on the horse. (I did that, too! I was once, when I was little more than a groom, told to ride a very serious horse and I questioned my boss about it but she insisted. Of course, the owner turned up. I have to say, I have always admired her for opening the arena door, asking why I was riding the horse, telling me to cool him out, closing the door quietly, and ripping a very deserved strip off my boss. The owner explained to me after that she was not angry at me and did not feel I had done the horse harm, but rules were rules. I always respected her for handling it that way.)
 
Ah well, an apology would have been better but the main thing is it won't happen again. I would still be annoyed every time I thought about it but I suppose since the yard is otherwise ideal then its best to move on!

Maybe you are right, sometimes if we are too easy going people do take advantage, most of the time not knowingly but they might think 'oh she won't mind she's so easy going' but at least they know what is what now!

Totally agree TarrSteps that was very good of the owner in question to handle it like that, it makes me mad when people have a go at someone young or naive when it was someone who should have known better behind it! Whether you're a groom, a waitress or working at Tesco, I WISH people would all be so decent to employees :-)

Glad you have got someone keeping an eye out for you OP and for what its worth I think your routine sounds perfectly lovely for a dressage horse, and OF COURSE you are allowed a holiday!!
 
thing is, perhaps I am a nasty suspicious person but I just don't believe it has not happened before...

If you are going to stay there, I would also suggest you make it clear to all other liveries that no other person can ride your horse. Quote the insurance issue to avoid any complication. I would not avoid the young girl but would have a quiet word without ripping her to pieces (as others said, not her fault) but would be good to clear the air - preferably talk with her AND her mother.

Mine feels different if anyone else rides him and I don't like it. The exception is the YO who is a considerably better rider than me and I learn just by watching her..
 
Well Alls well that ends well ,
Perhaps it's just as well to know where you really stand , that the YOer is not quite what you thought and can't be trusted as you thought.
I would get your relationship onto a more professional footing you are the customner she is providing a service .
You may need to micro manage the horse a little more if they have done this I can bet they are cutting corners in other places too.
It's good you have a friend on the yard to watch what's going on , keep this going.
YO is clearly overworked, so perhaps I would be discussing with your trainer if they know a local rider who could assist you with the riding and you can dress it up as I can see you have so much to so in future we will be doing x with Ernie, that's just a thought to play with.
Like Tarrsteps I am personally aware that this sort of thing goes on ( or at least it was when I was a youngster the thing is they usually don't get caught ) I am therefore not sure if I would trust the only one other time.
I would therefore be speaking to the mother of the teenager And therefore knowing all the other parents will know but thats not a difficult conversation they have done nothing wrong.
Finally well done for dealing with it without picking up your stuff and flouncing off ,your guard is now up you know now you must safeguard your precious horse very carefully and that's a good thing .
In a few weeks this will behind and the uncomfortable feeling you have now will
fade.
Good luck have fun with him.
 
Some LW teenagers can ride far better than older people. I imagine the YO knows her capabilities and wouldn't put her on something too much for her and TBH, just because horse is on full livery doesn't exclude someone other than YO riding it if YO deems them suitable - unless you had a clause to say only YO to ride of course but which would you prefer, a horse stuck in a box most of the day due to time restraints or one able to get his exercise properly with another decent rider under YO supervision?
I haven't read any replies at all just the opening post so could be completely wrong but it did come across as a bit of throwing your toys out of the pram that someone else could also ride your horse well.
 
Maesfen said:
Some LW teenagers can ride far better than older people. I imagine the YO knows her capabilities and wouldn't put her on something too much for her and TBH, just because horse is on full livery doesn't exclude someone other than YO riding it if YO deems them suitable - unless you had a clause to say only YO to ride of course but which would you prefer, a horse stuck in a box most of the day due to time restraints or one able to get his exercise properly with another decent rider under YO supervision?
I haven't read any replies at all just the opening post so could be completely wrong but it did come across as a bit of throwing your toys out of the pram that someone else could also ride your horse well.
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You don't put an 14 yo novice child onto a GP horse and send them to hack out , because it quicker when it's been arranged that you as YO are being specially paid to ride that horse.
The horse would have been uninsured in event of a third party claim and child would not have been covered in event of an accident not to mentain the potential damage to the horse had it gone wrong this could have bankrupted the YO .
GP horses been careful management OP needs to professional she trusts to ride
this horse to do what she was contracted to do ,ride the horse not treat like a riding school horse that had missed its slot .
 
Lol, AM, I understood from the OP that rider was capable, YO (who until now OP respected) also thought so else wouldn't have put her up in the first place. It all comes down to individual mentality I guess and I'm the odd one out here but many professional yards wouldn't survive if they didn't have extra riders to call upon if the need arises.
 
And the fact the random person is a minor - 14 - and hacked the horse on a public road, when neither had been discussed with the owner. All kinds of irresponsible.
 
Maesfen said:
Lol, AM, I understood from the OP that rider was capable, YO (who until now OP respected) also thought so else wouldn't have put her up in the first place. It all comes down to individual mentality I guess and I'm the odd one out here but many professional yards wouldn't survive if they didn't have extra riders to call upon if the need arises.
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If they put novice 14 yoon GP horses and spend them out on the road to save time they don't deserve to survive not mentain you don't take money from people to do something and then don't do it.
 
I have been that person, both rider and boss, Yes, it does completely depend on the agreement. I'm EXTREMELY grateful for some of the horses i've ridden this way, with the owners' blessing.
 
Maesfen said:
Lol, AM, I understood from the OP that rider was capable, YO (who until now OP respected) also thought so else wouldn't have put her up in the first place. It all comes down to individual mentality I guess and I'm the odd one out here but many professional yards wouldn't survive if they didn't have extra riders to call upon if the need arises.
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No. It was the YO whom the OP felt was capable. Not the 14 year old. And no professional yard will default to asking another livery to ride a horse which was is supposed to be ridden by staff. Why would she have paid for this service? if in fact, said horse was so easy that she could have asked another livery to ride? Our YO has a chart up with all the work plans for hers and full liveries and it is worked around various staff days off etc. Little more relaxed in the winter when not eventing and horses kept ticking over but still she has a plan around both hers and her staffs availability.
 
Skewbald, thanks for letting us know. I am really glad no real harm and that you have solved the problem in as far as you can.

And good luck for this international thingy !
 
I think you have handled it in a very sensible mature manner (I would be ABSOLUTELY fuming) and even more sensible to keep an eye on the situation for the future. It does sound like YO knows YO was in the wrong so hopefully will never happen again. Next you are on hols I would specify in writing who should be riding him to therefore ensure that such situation does not happen again.

I would say that the YO has had a VERY lucky escape - putting a child on your horse with no permission from yourself and not an employee of hers therefore with no insurance, allowing the horse & said rider onto the road in a situation she would not be prepared to put herself in as horse can be spooky (when there was another alternative - take around their land) but this was 'quicker' - so I think YO has had a very lucky escape to not be faced with the responsibility & subsequent compensation claims from a road accident involving: an injured uninsured minor rider, an injured valuable uninsured horse as there was no permission and an injured driver caused purely by YO's lack of duty of care in this instance. Very lucky indeed.
 
harrietSJ said:
I think YO has had a very lucky escape to not be faced with the responsibility & subsequent compensation claims from a road accident involving: an injured uninsured minor rider, an injured valuable uninsured horse as there was no permission and an injured driver caused purely by YO's lack of duty of care in this instance. Very lucky indeed.
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Very true, although that is the worst case scenario imagine if it DID happen and came back to bite the YO, I don't know how much the horse is worth but I shudder to think of someone being liable for it because they made such a stupid mistake... very poor judgement.


Also, people saying they can understand the YO is busy and therefore needs help with the riding - yes that would be acceptable from other sensible adult employees, but have you READ the bit about her being a 14 yo livery? Are you insane?!
 
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