Obsessive Worriers Anonymous...

[JFTDWS]

Hi, I'm JFTD and I can worry about anything. Horse not putting his ears forward over fences? Horse sweating after jumping on an unseasonably warm evening? Hair out of place under the saddle? Tiny little clear round jumping? Yep, I can worry about all those..

In the context of recent threads, it appears that I'm not alone, either.

I'm currently trying to "fix" my jumping paranoia by going out every week to pop round a small clear round at a local venue. And I mean small, like 70cm small. (And compared to what lots of people jump in here, that is definitely small!) Except that I swear the fences are getting bigger every week, and despite not having any major bad experiences I seem to be getting more and more wobbly over them every week :eek3: (I say that, I did fall off in the warm up this evening - oops!)

I'm trying to work on some NLP stuff - visualising and stuff - to improve this, coupled to desensitisation by repeated exposure, but who knows if it will work... I find I'm better if I'm talking to myself all the way, telling myself what to do seems to help me focus on what I need to do - but it is a bit cringey! (fortunately you can't hear most of the commentary on the videos!)

Anyway, this is our round tonight:

[youtube]T_ZR6OxgcSE[/youtube]

If anyone's interested (and indeed, for the very bored, there are extensive ramblings on the blog in my sig). I'd certainly appreciate cc as we clearly have loads to improve on (even if I am reasonably pleased with some aspects!).

But the major reason I'm posting is to ask for others who are a bit prone to worrying unnecessarily and wobbling over things which shouldn't be un-achievable to share their experiences and coping mechanisms and generally any advice you'd like to offer!

No food in the house, but can offer a hug from a very friendly collie and a nice, reassuring cup of tea...

 

[NiceChristmasBaubles]

I can't really help you very much as I too am a compulsive worrier. But I have worked out a very scientific formula (not!). I allow myself around 10% worry/new situation and 90% comfort zone. I can't really tell you what that is because you will need to work out what 10% is for yourself, but when I can overcome that 10% worry factor, it feels great and then I look for the next mini achievement which is in our grasp but not too much. Sorry complete drivel but you might get some of what I mean. :/

P.S. tea sounds good - you can keep the dog, I have two soggy labs already.

 

[JFTDWS]

I can't really help you very much as I too am a compulsive worrier. But I have worked out a very scientific formula (not!). I allow myself around 10% worry/new situation and 90% comfort zone. I can't really tell you what that is because you will need to work out what 10% is for yourself, but when I can overcome that 10% worry factor, it feels great and then I look for the next mini achievement which is in our grasp but not too much. Sorry complete drivel but you might get some of what I mean. :/

P.S. tea sounds good - you can keep the dog, I have two soggy labs already.

Not drivel at all! Sounds very sensible - basically tackle new things in small steps and focus on the majority of what you're asking being within your comfort zone?

Welcome to the club. Tea all round then - can't beat a nice cup of tea

 

[NiceChristmasBaubles]

Not drivel at all! Sounds very sensible - basically tackle new things in small steps and focus on the majority of what you're asking being within your comfort zone?

Welcome to the club. Tea all round then - can't beat a nice cup of tea

Yes that's pretty much it. I can only change one thing at a time. So I couldn't lose the martingale and the flash strap in one go or lose the flash strap and work in the outdoor school the same day. Luckily I have a very patient instructor.

ETA our latest is riding outside the arena, eg to/from tests etc. 100 yards can seem like 100 miles when you are quivering in your boots. Cam doesn't know about any of this, it's all in my mind. :redface3:

 

[JFTDWS]

Yes that's pretty much it. I can only change one thing at a time. So I couldn't lose the martingale and the flash strap in one go or lose the flash strap and work in the outdoor school the same day. Luckily I have a very patient instructor.

ETA our latest is riding outside the arena, eg to/from tests etc. 100 yards can seem like 100 miles when you are quivering in your boots. Cam doesn't know about any of this, it's all in my mind. :redface3:

That's brilliantly mental But also completely logical! I don't really worry about tack, oddly. Or rather, changing it - I'm paranoid about saddles / bits etc interfering with his performance, but not loss of control. Bizarrely, I don't even know what I'm worried about! I just know I'm worried and it's not cool!

I do feel your pain about riding around though. Hacking a few hundred metres alone can send me totally wobbly in the right circumstances too :redface3:

 

[NiceChristmasBaubles]

That's brilliantly mental But also completely logical! I don't really worry about tack, oddly. Or rather, changing it - I'm paranoid about saddles / bits etc interfering with his performance, but not loss of control. Bizarrely, I don't even know what I'm worried about! I just know I'm worried and it's not cool!

I do feel your pain about riding around though. Hacking a few hundred metres alone can send me totally wobbly in the right circumstances too :redface3:

I only do logical!! Don't forget you have 20 odd years on your side compared with me. I had a rearing/napping/spooking/bucking nutter of a mare when I was your age. And then I bought another model (in addition) which did exactly the same. He got sold. I didn't need two of them. You might think it was my riding, but actually I just used to go for the nutters.

Oh, and then I grew up, got married, had kids and started to feel more fragile.

 

[JFTDWS]

I only do logical!! Don't forget you have 20 odd years on your side compared with me. I had a rearing/napping/spooking/bucking nutter of a mare when I was your age. And then I bought another model (in addition) which did exactly the same. He got sold. I didn't need two of them. You might think it was my riding, but actually I just used to go for the nutters.

You were clearly braver than I am now! I like Fergs - he doesn't really do much wrong. It's just me that has the issues!

(My shoulders are seizing up - I'm too old for this unintentional dismount lark!)

(eta, didn't think it was your riding for a second! That would be illogical, and I aspire to a vulcan outlook too...)

 

[NiceChristmasBaubles]

You were clearly braver than I am now! I like Fergs - he doesn't really do much wrong. It's just me that has the issues!

(My shoulders are seizing up - I'm too old for this unintentional dismount lark!)

(eta, didn't think it was your riding for a second! That would be illogical, and I aspire to a vulcan outlook too...)

Cam does nothing wrong either, well for a 6 year old. I am sooo looking forward to him being 7 and then he will be the horse I wanted to buy in the first place. My next mission is to hack him. Oh, my poor instructor, she doesn't know this yet. And then I want to do some grid work. That will be harder because at the moment I don't 'do' body protectors, but perhaps I should, but then would it make me worse?????

Please note - Cam does hack, I just don't hack him beacuse I worry that if I fall off something will happen to him. Oh, and I hack, but not on Cam. It's complicated. :redface3:

 

[Costypop]

I swear I have OCD, the poor lad that does my horse 3days a week, he's a saint for putting up with me! I micro manage everything!

 

[SusieT]

I would lose the spurs (you're kicking with them at times which isn't really the correct thing).
I would also practice giving over the jump, if you watch you currently do a kind of stand up in the stirrups rather than a jumping position, you don't bend forward and your hands tend to 'grab' before the jump-work on keeping them still with an elastic contact and don't panic.
Position wise it can be useful to push your hands conciously forwards a few times-he tends to hesitate over the jump which is probably to some extent an effect of not being allowed to go over the jump due to the above position/hands issue. If your lower leg is secure you can also try getting a good canter, in the 2-point position and doing a few jumps without moving from that position except to give with your hands in order to encourage him to continue going to the jump rather than pausing a couple of strides before it.

 

[Sussexbythesea]

It is a right PITA isn't it when nerves stop you enjoying something to the full and reaching your physical potential?

If I were you I would think about concentrating on yourself and your position and technique so that you wouldn't worry so much about the other stuff? Also every time you think a negative thought stop yourself and make yourself think about something else - I have parts of songs and poems in my head which I recite. I guess this is some kind of NLP but self taught. I did do a day workshop of hypnotherapy type stuff once but I can't say it did anything that I could tell.

My coping mechanism prior to something that worries me is firstly to stop myself worrying all week up until it happens is to have withdrawal as a viable option. If possible entry on the day is better then I can deny I'm going to do it at all until I put the entry in .

I actually find the more I jump the more nervous I become as it brings me closer to the inevitable fall off due to the law of averages However if I am in a true competition situation my blood goes up and I concentrate very much on getting around and trying to win a rozzi whereas a clear round maybe doesn't have that thrill?

 

[AliceCrail]

You have my sympathy.
I have recently come to realise that I am rather controlling and have had to face up to the fact I have lost my nerve.

However, having actually faced up to this and acknowledged I have a problem has really helped me. I know I am looking for excuses, so when I start worrying about something, I remind myself that there isn't actually an issue there, it is just anxiety. This has seemed to help me deal with it. I went cubbing on Saturday, and it is only when I got home that I realised I hadn't had any nerves all day! This included loading and travelling in the dark for the first time, tacking up in a strange yard, hacking 1.5miles and then being out for 2hrs. My horse became quite naughty towards the end, but I felt mentally in control and so could cope.

My biggest anxiety now is collecting rings/warm up at shows. But I know that compared to hunting it is fine, so it is just anxiety and therefore not a real 'thing' if you see what I mean!

 

[Mahoganybay]

I would lose the spurs (you're kicking with them at times which isn't really the correct thing).
I would also practice giving over the jump, if you watch you currently do a kind of stand up in the stirrups rather than a jumping position, you don't bend forward and your hands tend to 'grab' before the jump-work on keeping them still with an elastic contact and don't panic.
Position wise it can be useful to push your hands conciously forwards a few times-he tends to hesitate over the jump which is probably to some extent an effect of not being allowed to go over the jump due to the above position/hands issue. If your lower leg is secure you can also try getting a good canter, in the 2-point position and doing a few jumps without moving from that position except to give with your hands in order to encourage him to continue going to the jump rather than pausing a couple of strides before it.

What SusieT said, also there was a lot of time spent before you actually started jumping, too much time to get yourself nervous & over think things. Your pony looks like he knows what he is doing, what about thinking, right i am in the ring, pony knows his job, lets just crack on.

 

[amandaco2]

Also ocd about everything!!!

 

[Boysy]

Seriously I cannot recommend this CD enough, http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Show-Jump...500?pt=LH_DefaultDomain_3&hash=item23304d5fb4

I bought it for my daughter in the summer and to say it has changed her way of thinking and coping would be an understatement, she listened to it religiously for a couple of wks every night and now just listens to it before she competes or jump schools, changed her whole attitude to jumping which in turn has changed ponies attitude who has gone from a 'oh if you don't want to jump it we won't' to 'for lords sake child how many times do i have to help you out here, it's only a cross pole!' That sounds awful but it really isn't, it just means that instead of constantly over analysing the 'what if's' and thinking way too much, daughter is concentrating on the 'what next's' and can get striding wrong etc and pony helps her out rather than just grinding to a halt.

 

[Hedwards]

I've become a compulsive worrier... I never used to be, but since I bought Mickey and my confidence has been knocked (took a couple of tumbles... First falls where I have actually been thrown off and not just fallen off iyswim) so I now am always worrying, Mickey was diagnosed with stomach ulcers, so I'm now always looking for any sign they're back.

He was an absolute nob head for clipping the other day... So that's set me back and sent me into a tiz.

He had an op on his stifle a few years ago (before I had him) so I'm constantly looking out for any issues in that area.

I worry about taking him out incase he gets stressy & ulcery, all totally unfounded as he's yet to put a foot wrong when ridden since the ulcers were sorted!

I'm just glad I'm not the only one!

 

[hollyandivy123]

other than nerves i think you have lost your fun...........................you always are expecting the Spanish inquisition! you are expecting the worse thing to happen and if you do then it will.

forget about jumping in these situations, go on fun rides, have lessons with someone who will motivate you and push you at the same time, have fun this winter then come back all guns blazing in the spring. have lessons on a school master, lung lessons would be good to help with your balance and you don't have to worry about the horse....................have fun lass if you get your mojo back everything else will happen

 

[JFTDWS]

I would lose the spurs (you're kicking with them at times which isn't really the correct thing).
I would also practice giving over the jump, if you watch you currently do a kind of stand up in the stirrups rather than a jumping position, you don't bend forward and your hands tend to 'grab' before the jump-work on keeping them still with an elastic contact and don't panic.
Position wise it can be useful to push your hands conciously forwards a few times-he tends to hesitate over the jump which is probably to some extent an effect of not being allowed to go over the jump due to the above position/hands issue. If your lower leg is secure you can also try getting a good canter, in the 2-point position and doing a few jumps without moving from that position except to give with your hands in order to encourage him to continue going to the jump rather than pausing a couple of strides before it.

1. The kicking. Bloody vile, isn't it? I absolutely hate it. But I think it's symptomatic of the above - I don't do it jumping bigger / more complicated courses at home. It's like I lose my marbles and start throwing anything I have at him. It usually happens when I see a longer stride and I want to be sure he goes on it (keeping in mind, I did splat into a fence in the warm up over just this disagreement so I was probably desperately trying not to avoid the situation again). This is the pony whose default is to get in underneath the fence and perform a harrier jump jet manoeuvre over it :eek3:

Thing is, I doubt I could get a decent enough canter out without spurs. I jump at home without sometimes, but he really backs off my leg when we're out. He's rather green / nervous in that sense. I guess I could try warming up in them and losing them for the actual CR/class.

2. Oh heck I've spent all summer learning NOT to throw my reins at him! I have two options - what I'm doing here, or throwing them at him and having nothing on landing. It's ghastly and clearly a point for further investigation / alteration.

3. My position is a constant source of woe. I'm working on it... Honest!

4. I've been trying that at home (well I was before it rained and my field became more suited to growing rice). He's just not confident or established enough to do it out yet. And don't start me on my lower leg... Believe me, I know there's issues!

Thanks for your comments, it's all stuff to work on.

Your pony looks like he knows what he is doing, what about thinking, right i am in the ring, pony knows his job, lets just crack on.

That is probably the more flattering thing anyone has ever written about us on HHO - even if it wasn't meant to be...

forget about jumping in these situations, go on fun rides, have lessons with someone who will motivate you and push you at the same time, have fun this winter then come back all guns blazing in the spring. have lessons on a school master, lung lessons would be good to help with your balance and you don't have to worry about the horse....................have fun lass if you get your mojo back everything else will happen

Oh heck! I really wasn't clear in my OP! We don't have issues with anything - we've done the odd fun ride, TREC, we jump/school/play games etc at home fine - if anything, I get bored! My next aim is to teach him to be a horseback archery horse! We can do fun It's just this jumping competitvely nonsense that gives me issues! (well and hacking him alone, but that's a long story!) But that's my fault for not being very clear, and thanks for your comments

I'm working through the psychology comments and they're proving very interesting - thanks all. Just responding to these as they're "easy" to answer!

 

[tabithakat64]

I tried everything to battle nerves from rescue remedy to NLP. I eventually went to Jo Cooper as she had been recommended to me on here and she really helped me with my confidence issues.

I worry about doing the right thing by mine all the time and have only really started getting over it during the last year.

I think you're absolutely doing the right thing by confronting both your fears by doing the clear round weekly. Are you able to do some SJ clinics or hire out a venue and have a lesson?

 

[Holidays_are_coming]

I seem to be okish with the riding but completely paranoid about if they are ok or not right not as happy as they were its driving me crazy. My new boy is fine hasn't put a foot wrong but I keep expecting the worst. The latest is he has a little cough when we start trotting now in my head its copd.... even though he has gone from haylage over and its last year's not so nice stuff he is eating. Any tips on how to stop myself going crazy? ???

 

[EmmaB]

I thought that was a nice neat round! If talking to yourself works then keep doing it! I did have to laugh at the end, did you say 'I'm such a pleb'? lmao.

The only way to get over nerves is to keep at it. This time last year I made myself go to 60cm classes and was nervous, fell off, got eliminated, had a million refusals every time I went! Now I'm still a bit of a wuss but I can happily jump 90cm courses. Infact my horse jumps better the bigger they are which made it a hell of a lot easier! Also I moved yards to a place where I have a friend who I go everywhere with, which has helped loads as you encourage each other. Am I right in thinking you are on your own at your yard? (Stalker alert..haha no just a lurker!) so maybe if you had someone else to ride with when you jump at home it would help?

 

[JFTDWS]

Welcome to the club! Glad to see there's a fair few of us!

I swear I have OCD, the poor lad that does my horse 3days a week, he's a saint for putting up with me! I micro manage everything!

Also ocd about everything!!!

I've become a compulsive worrier... I never used to be, but since I bought Mickey and my confidence has been knocked (took a couple of tumbles... First falls where I have actually been thrown off and not just fallen off iyswim) so I now am always worrying, Mickey was diagnosed with stomach ulcers, so I'm now always looking for any sign they're back.

He was an absolute nob head for clipping the other day... So that's set me back and sent me into a tiz.

He had an op on his stifle a few years ago (before I had him) so I'm constantly looking out for any issues in that area.

I worry about taking him out incase he gets stressy & ulcery, all totally unfounded as he's yet to put a foot wrong when ridden since the ulcers were sorted!

I'm just glad I'm not the only one!

I seem to be okish with the riding but completely paranoid about if they are ok or not right not as happy as they were its driving me crazy. My new boy is fine hasn't put a foot wrong but I keep expecting the worst. The latest is he has a little cough when we start trotting now in my head its copd.... even though he has gone from haylage over and its last year's not so nice stuff he is eating. Any tips on how to stop myself going crazy? ???

Eeek! We're all screwed! I'm ok about management - definitely couldn't call me paranoid or obsessive about that! But I do presume every little quirk, every facial expression or odd movement is the result of some complex undiagnosed illness :eek3: I think that comes from spending too much time on here! Thanks for sharing anyway - nice to know we're all in this together

And H_A_C, no chance of me helping you avoid insanity - I'm pretty well already there!

 

[JFTDWS]

It is a right PITA isn't it when nerves stop you enjoying something to the full and reaching your physical potential?

I'm not sure I have much physical potential, but I'd like to "borrow" Fergs' potential as he's definitely not reached his!

If I were you I would think about concentrating on yourself and your position and technique so that you wouldn't worry so much about the other stuff? Also every time you think a negative thought stop yourself and make yourself think about something else - I have parts of songs and poems in my head which I recite. I guess this is some kind of NLP but self taught. I did do a day workshop of hypnotherapy type stuff once but I can't say it did anything that I could tell.

I do similar with lines of songs / poetry too. And catchy one liners for riding It is helpful! I think a shot on something more established would allow me to concentrate on myself. With F, I'm too busy focussing on the canter and the stride to worry about me!

My coping mechanism prior to something that worries me is firstly to stop myself worrying all week up until it happens is to have withdrawal as a viable option. If possible entry on the day is better then I can deny I'm going to do it at all until I put the entry in .

I never enter jumping in advance either :redface3:

I actually find the more I jump the more nervous I become as it brings me closer to the inevitable fall off due to the law of averages However if I am in a true competition situation my blood goes up and I concentrate very much on getting around and trying to win a rozzi whereas a clear round maybe doesn't have that thrill?

I get a buzz going around the course, as I don't get much chance to jump proper courses at home (field!) but you're right - certainly less adrenaline than competitive jumping. And I feel similarly - I felt I was due being dropping into a fence (law of averages!) and I was right. Maybe I can be confident next time that it's less likely by the same law?!

You have my sympathy.
I have recently come to realise that I am rather controlling and have had to face up to the fact I have lost my nerve.

However, having actually faced up to this and acknowledged I have a problem has really helped me. I know I am looking for excuses, so when I start worrying about something, I remind myself that there isn't actually an issue there, it is just anxiety. This has seemed to help me deal with it. I went cubbing on Saturday, and it is only when I got home that I realised I hadn't had any nerves all day! This included loading and travelling in the dark for the first time, tacking up in a strange yard, hacking 1.5miles and then being out for 2hrs. My horse became quite naughty towards the end, but I felt mentally in control and so could cope.

My biggest anxiety now is collecting rings/warm up at shows. But I know that compared to hunting it is fine, so it is just anxiety and therefore not a real 'thing' if you see what I mean!

That's an interesting perspective. I think acknowledging your fear is just that can help you control it - I've certainly been known to recite "the only thing to fear is fear itself" repetitively in stressful situations! But well done you for overcoming your nerves and getting out there!

Seriously I cannot recommend this CD enough, http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Show-Jump...500?pt=LH_DefaultDomain_3&hash=item23304d5fb4

I bought it for my daughter in the summer and to say it has changed her way of thinking and coping would be an understatement, she listened to it religiously for a couple of wks every night and now just listens to it before she competes or jump schools, changed her whole attitude to jumping which in turn has changed ponies attitude who has gone from a 'oh if you don't want to jump it we won't' to 'for lords sake child how many times do i have to help you out here, it's only a cross pole!' That sounds awful but it really isn't, it just means that instead of constantly over analysing the 'what if's' and thinking way too much, daughter is concentrating on the 'what next's' and can get striding wrong etc and pony helps her out rather than just grinding to a halt.

Now that's interesting! I shall have a wee look and possibly stick it on my Christmas list... Thanks And well done to your daughter for changing her approach!

 

[JFTDWS]

I tried everything to battle nerves from rescue remedy to NLP. I eventually went to Jo Cooper as she had been recommended to me on here and she really helped me with my confidence issues.

I worry about doing the right thing by mine all the time and have only really started getting over it during the last year.

I think you're absolutely doing the right thing by confronting both your fears by doing the clear round weekly. Are you able to do some SJ clinics or hire out a venue and have a lesson?

That's a reasonably sensible suggestion, except I'm on a bit of an economy drive (trying to pay off my overdraft :eek3: ) but possibly after christmas... It's certainly something I'd like to do!

What's Jo Cooper's approach?

I thought that was a nice neat round! If talking to yourself works then keep doing it! I did have to laugh at the end, did you say 'I'm such a pleb'? lmao.

The only way to get over nerves is to keep at it. This time last year I made myself go to 60cm classes and was nervous, fell off, got eliminated, had a million refusals every time I went! Now I'm still a bit of a wuss but I can happily jump 90cm courses. Infact my horse jumps better the bigger they are which made it a hell of a lot easier! Also I moved yards to a place where I have a friend who I go everywhere with, which has helped loads as you encourage each other. Am I right in thinking you are on your own at your yard? (Stalker alert..haha no just a lurker!) so maybe if you had someone else to ride with when you jump at home it would help?

I've had worse rounds, I'll say that And yes, I'm not very polite to myself!

Well done you! I'm not sure that F will find it easier when they're bigger - trouble with a midget pony! But I reckon he'll find it easier when they go up if we have the basics sorted first... So this is the plan, for now!

You're right, I am alone - and I clearly post on here far too much! I was probably bolder when Dafthoss used to come and do jumps for me, but never exactly brave. I've been on a fair few yards and never really had anyone to jump with - either I'm just not very personable, or a bit unlucky there... Most folk I know either don't jump, or jump much bigger than us, so not really compatible to compete / go out with. It's a good idea in principle -and it could work - but I wouldn't know how to put it into practice!

 

[Liane]

I read all the comments before watching and I thought I was going to see something awful! It wasn't at all, it was a nice round, we all have things to improve on my goodness you should have seen me at my first BE event a few weeks ago, my horse decided he was a hurdler in the SJ!!! and I have the opposite problem, I look like a child on my rather large horse!

I used to ride at Norton Heath and my horse was quite backward in there and any indoor arena really, he is so much better in an outdoor arena/on grass. I think it would be good to get him a bit more forward and flowing over the fences, that would make your job a lot easier, but it takes time for them to get that confidence and be more forward. I am sure you will get there though Only thing that has helped my nerves is to do more of it and do more scary stuff at home, that way when i go and walk a course I can say "oh these look small" ;-)

 

[NiceChristmasBaubles]

That's brilliantly mental But also completely logical! I don't really worry about tack, oddly. Or rather, changing it - I'm paranoid about saddles / bits etc interfering with his performance, but not loss of control. Bizarrely, I don't even know what I'm worried about! I just know I'm worried and it's not cool!

I do feel your pain about riding around though. Hacking a few hundred metres alone can send me totally wobbly in the right circumstances too :redface3:

I broke my own rules today. Well I didn't really have much choice. Actually I did, but I didn't let myself take the easy option of putting him back on the box and bringing him home.....

I took Cam over to my instructor's yard for one of the staff to do a low chaser clip. I have my own clippers but with all the goings on here I thought it would be easier all round just to get someone else to do it. The plan was then for C to ride Cam afterwards as when I came off last year it was the first time he was ridden after being clipped. So clip was done and he was tacked up waiting when C texted me to say she couldn't ride as she had a bug. So feeling very sick (nerves, not bug!) I got on and rode him. After 5 minutes I realised that he hadn't been ridden for a week as he had his routine Equine Body Worker treatment just before the weekend so needed time to recover. Had a brief mental panic but carried on. I managed W, T & C on both reins and schooled for about half an hour. It wasn't the best I've ridden, but we did it and I lived to tell the tale.

 

[JFTDWS]

I read all the comments before watching and I thought I was going to see something awful! It wasn't at all, it was a nice round, we all have things to improve on my goodness you should have seen me at my first BE event a few weeks ago, my horse decided he was a hurdler in the SJ!!! and I have the opposite problem, I look like a child on my rather large horse!

I used to ride at Norton Heath and my horse was quite backward in there and any indoor arena really, he is so much better in an outdoor arena/on grass. I think it would be good to get him a bit more forward and flowing over the fences, that would make your job a lot easier, but it takes time for them to get that confidence and be more forward. I am sure you will get there though Only thing that has helped my nerves is to do more of it and do more scary stuff at home, that way when i go and walk a course I can say "oh these look small" ;-)

Well better than expected is always good - and actually I'd say "not awful" is an improvement for us Should we swap horses, do you think? I clearly wasn't thinking when I bought highlands - I'm far too tall! Fortunately, his hobbitness sees to put up with it...!

Is it just me or does that arena make fences look massive? I swear 3ft in my field looks small compared to a 70cm in there... Either that or I'm just a bit lacking in the eye department! Forward and flowing is definitely our goal. I probably should have worked on it over summer when outdoor arenas and grass were more of an option - but I feel like the summer was well spent really "getting" the forwards and jumping stuff at home. I think you're right more is the answer - I'm hoping I will go through a metaphorical barrier in my mind and 70s will start to look do-able, then small, then we can try an 80... (oh the dizzy heights of an 80cm CR lol).

Alas no big fences at home as my field is practically under sea level with this weather!


ETA - Nice one Niki! Big step in the right direction for you - and well done Cam for being a good lad

 

[NiceChristmasBaubles]

Alas no big fences at home as my field is practically under sea level with this weather!


ETA - Nice one Niki! Big step in the right direction for you - and well done Cam for being a good lad

Thank you - I've been dreading it for around a year. He really could have done with a bit more taken off, but we can gradually get there. I sympathise re the weather, I currently have 3 swamp ponies.

ETA I really do find that repetition does help and the more you do it the better it will become. Especially if you can keep going back to the same place again and again. Someone earlier mentioned about not entering till the day, I find the opposite works with me. Once I have entered I can then plan my practice etc. and count down the mini targets I need to get through before the next competition. Most of the time these days I really enjoy my riding, just in case it sounds like I am putting myself through torture, there are just little blips and new things that I have to get through. x

 

[JFTDWS]

Thank you - I've been dreading it for around a year. He really could have done with a bit more taken off, but we can gradually get there. I sympathise re the weather, I currently have 3 swamp ponies.

Nothing to stop you lopping off a bit more every week! I can't do lines so everything comes off mine asap... And now you'll have nothing to worry about this year either

Weather is vile. I know it's October, I'm not really complaining, but I don't much care for this mud!

 

[Liane]

The fences do look big in there, I always thought Longwood courses seemed smaller I also tended to fall off a lot at Norton Heath! ha!ha! your welcome to come and have a try, here he is at the BE event, and I am about 5'5/5'6 so I am not that small!! http://www.onlinepictureproof.com/1...se_trials_2013/380452/browse/237/?w=800&h=477 I do really like Highlands, I rode a youngster for a while

It also might be worth saving up to have a lesson or hiring an arena with a confidence giving friend so you can have a play without the pressure, what about hiring the arena for an hour at Norton Heath? You can then get him flowing, forward and confident over one fence and build it up to a course