Odd/ funny situations you stumble on

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fuzzymooch

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For fun really. Following on from the things you find thread. Sat with dd2 making sure the milk stays in and browsing started to think about all the odd situations I'd stumbled on either out on the boys or when turning up at the yard. Been plenty of loose horses, cows etc but my top three are:

With D found a strange man in military uniform in my box one am. Turns out he was protecting a judge in residence where we were stabled, his wife was horsey and he'd noticed D's rug had slipped so poped in to put him right!

No. 2 arrived at yard at tea time one winter evening to find a bunch of people sat opposite my stable in deck chairs complete with bobble hats, scarf's and flasks. E assumed they were there to watch him and preceded to stare at them. They were in fact a bat survay group but I never told E that!

,No 3. Got to yard, only one there and a bloke shows up and points out a car two fields over. Its a focus type not something you off road in muddy winter fields. He claims his girlfriend kicked him out so he slept in his car in the field (why not a car park. Layby or heck even the field gateway I haven't the foggiest). Anyway the car is stuck can he borrow a shovel? Yeah right I'm alone on the yard here have this murder weapon! I mumbled an excuse about it being full livery so tools not mine and edged up to mr C who is giving the man interrupting breakfast timehis hardest stare and called ym. Ym muttered about stupid men and said she'd send the guys with a tractor. Informed focus man and told him to wait with his car.

People can be soooo odd. What have you h&hs stumbled on?
 
Arrived at yard one day to find one girl floating about in a beautiful, full skirted summer dress, full make up, hair (very long) down but immaculately done, high heeled sandals. She looked stunning to be fair .... Turns out she was about to have one of those horse and rider photoshoots done and was waiting for the photographer to arrive.
 
I was hacking my horse round the farm early one sunny morning and came across a man sunbathing naked on a xc jump (table top!) - nearly ruddy fell off as my horse spooked & span when he jumped up in surprise....

Was hacking round the local forestry commission park that is very popular and came across a man taking photos of a naked woman on one of the main paths.....
As you do.....

The funniest (once we'd gained control again) was when a friend and I encountered a shed with two sets of human feet walking in rather a wobbly fashion down a farm track....
The horses froze as we shouted "hello" to let the shed know that we were there (no room to pass!) and then they both span and legged it as the shed opened it's mouth (door) and a couple of strong lads emerged!!
Apparently it was easier to move it like that than get the trailer & the pick up up the track!!
 
I was coming home from a hack heading up a field towards a road in a banked cutting with a wall on top. The Kellogg sponsored round Britain cycle race was on, unknown to me, and I did a double take when a ten foot long packet of cornflakes made its way up the road, apparently completely under its own steam. It still makes me smile two decades later.

It was the same ride when I passed my ginger tom sitting watching a mole hill on the way out, to find him still in exactly the same place over an hour later when I came back.
 
The only incident I can remember was when I went travelling to Australia.

I was working for a family who had a few holiday cottages they ran and me and another girl helped with the cleaning of them. We lived at the family home and they had 7 horses and a few kms of private trails to ride along.

One of the holiday cottages was out in the sticks, away from any road (you had to drive through 2 fields and then up a hill into the woodland to get to it) and surrounded by trees. It was really nice and a 'nature' cottage as it was made from all natural resources. Some of the guests took this a bit too literally though! One of the trail rides went right past this cottage, and we were riding along one day and looked over at the cottage as we always did, and the couple were sat out in the deckchairs butt naked - EVERYTHING on show :o

We giggled and the galloped off in case they heard us! That wasn't the only time it happened either....
 
old time traveling man alseep in the hay.OH took him coffee. he was a very polite gentleman and you wouldn`t have know he had been there.
 
Rode past some people 'dogging' in a car parked on the lanes near the yard. I scurried off, but later wished I'd stopped and parked my horse with her face against the window. Because the couple in question would have looked up to see a long horse face staring at them.
 
Re the dogging. I knew nothing about this and used to tell my Boss I was dogging in my lunch hour when I meant I was going home to walk the dogs !
 
A friend an I were out hacking and had a canter up the "canter track" as we called it. About 1/2 way up my old boy slammed on the anchors and stared as a man jumped out of the bushes and ran off down the track with his trousers round his ankles. We sniggered and carried on but when we got to the top of the track, the gate we needed to go through was blocked by a tractor so we had to go back down the track.

As we went down, the man's partner - another man - not expecting us to turn round and come back had decided the coast was clear and he could safely emerge from the bushes - which he did when we were about 15m away. The whole thing would have been hilarious had the 2nd man not been the husband of a friend of my friend (who was with me on her horse). Instead, they made eye contact, said nothing to each other and he ran away. I of course had no idea and couldn't work out why they were staring at each other. Awkward!
 
annagain said:
A friend an I were out hacking and had a canter up the "canter track" as we called it. About 1/2 way up my old boy slammed on the anchors and stared as a man jumped out of the bushes and ran off down the track with his trousers round his ankles. We sniggered and carried on but when we got to the top of the track, the gate we needed to go through was blocked by a tractor so we had to go back down the track.

As we went down, the man's partner - another man - not expecting us to turn round and come back had decided the coast was clear and he could safely emerge from the bushes - which he did when we were about 15m away. The whole thing would have been hilarious had the 2nd man not been the husband of a friend of my friend (who was with me on her horse). Instead, they made eye contact, said nothing to each other and he ran away. I of course had no idea and couldn't work out why they were staring at each other. Awkward!
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Ooh thats a juicy one! Come on tell us, did the poor wife get to hear about her husband's infidelity?
 
Walking back from turning out the horses the other day, there is a public footpath which runs between two of the fields used by the horses, and one of the fields has a water trough on the fence-line. As we passed the mouth of the footpath a guy was just turning away from the fence-line doing up his flies. We were debating whether he'd gone in the trough or the grass.....hopefully the latter!
 
I used to ride regularly on Cannock Chase. I'm pretty sure various couples thought they were well hidden in the wilderness - until me and my nosy horse used to mooch past.

There are little pull in car parks and one day we were out in the pouring rain. Horse is a bit sulky as it wasn't his favourite weather, but we're heading home and he's marching on. I suddenly realise the little car in the car park is steamed up and gently jogging backwards and forwards. Rather mortified I tried to persuade horse to take another track - but that's a longer route home and he's having none of it. So straight past the car it is! Didn't help that the silly animal was having a good old prance and snort at the car whilst I was trying to keep my eyes diverted.....

And I'm another one whose had a good old blast up a track (again on the Chase) only to have the horse slam the brakes on as someone has realised their hiding place in the bushes isn't quite a discrete as they first thought!
 
rowan666 said:
Ooh thats a juicy one! Come on tell us, did the poor wife get to hear about her husband's infidelity?
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Sort of. My poor friend didn't know what the hell to do. She wasn't very close to the wife (but close enough to have met the husband and recognise him straight away and vice versa). Luckily, my friend found out from another friend that he had come out to her and left before she saw the wife. She doesn't know if the coming out involved that particular story but if it did, nobody's ever mentioned it to her. My friend decided she either knows and doesn't want to talk about it or doesn't and telling her now won't do any good.

ETA - the couple aren't remotely horsey so I feel safe telling you on here. Friend and I have generally been very discreet about it.
 
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Snuffles said:
Re the dogging. I knew nothing about this and used to tell my Boss I was dogging in my lunch hour when I meant I was going home to walk the dogs !
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Hahahaha! That reminds me of the Peter Kay Car Share episode where they talk about the same thing!
 
SEL said:
I used to ride regularly on Cannock Chase. I'm pretty sure various couples thought they were well hidden in the wilderness - until me and my nosy horse used to mooch past.

There are little pull in car parks and one day we were out in the pouring rain. Horse is a bit sulky as it wasn't his favourite weather, but we're heading home and he's marching on. I suddenly realise the little car in the car park is steamed up and gently jogging backwards and forwards. Rather mortified I tried to persuade horse to take another track - but that's a longer route home and he's having none of it. So straight past the car it is! Didn't help that the silly animal was having a good old prance and snort at the car whilst I was trying to keep my eyes diverted.....

And I'm another one whose had a good old blast up a track (again on the Chase) only to have the horse slam the brakes on as someone has realised their hiding place in the bushes isn't quite a discrete as they first thought!
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I know of children ( not mine ) who when riding past cars with steamy windows would shout out "we know what you're doing "
 
Had recently moved to a new house and called round to one of the neighbours - only to stumble upon her husband mowing the lawn wearing just his boots. 'Don't worry G' he shouted across the garden 'it won't get you from here!' :o:D
 
Was sat on my horse talking to a guy in full camo gear who was doing some rabbit shooting for our neighboring farmer. Horse was oblivious. The guy moved and my horse papped himself :D
 
When we lived overseas the exotic animals laws were not very strict and I once drove passed an HGV parked at a roadside filling station with a huge monkey sitting on the drivers seat...that was odd!

My OH is a greenkeeper and at one of his previous courses they would sometimes find couples in states of undress asleep in the sand bunkers at first light on summer mornings...or sometimes just bum and feet prints as evidence lol!

As a teenager I also witnessed one of the male science teachers at my school running down the corridor wearing nothing but a pair of leopard print briefs...the school had an It's a Knockout style competition to raise money for charity during lunch break and he ended up covered in gunge so went to shower in the PE block but left all his clean clothes back in his classroom then had to make a dash for. Nobody saw it except my best friend and I who happened to turn the corner just in time to see him sprinting towards us. Chemistry was a bit awkward for the rest of the term.
 
Like others I was was up on the gallop track with a friend of mine having a good old blast when we spotted a naked butt popping up and down in the long grass at the side of the track. Unfortunately for the couple we were moving pretty fast and came alongside them before they realised we were there.

Another time I was out with some friends on a bridle way that goes round the common and through a small section of wood. I was cantering in front through the wooded bit when I turned a corner to find a family sitting on the ground having a picnic across the bridleway (why they picked the shaded and muddy bit of the common I have no idea). I couldn't pull up in time and cantered across their tablecloth apologising. When we came round a second time they were still there with a very muddy picnic cloth.
 
We took on the rental of a very cheap 27 acre field that had been allowed to go wild so had lots of trees, gorse, slopes, depressions filled with water etc. as well as some grass. The previous tenants were the army and they'd used it for training purposes. Initally we fenced off the best part of it which the horses duly cleared whilst we extended the fencing to the boundaries and tidied it up.
One evening the neighbours saw army reserves out on a march but thought little of it. Next morning we all saw them again and where they had spent the night! In our field....... They swore blind they thought it was still army land even though the horses had kept disturbing them.
The following year we got a phone call from a tree hugging local councillor to say we had campers in the field, a father and son this time, who admitted having spent 3 nights there when my OH tackled them. Again the horses kept visiting but at least they had no guy ropes for their tent! What really annoyed us was the councillor had to have been trespassing in the first place to have found them. Also they had to have walked past a proper campsite to get to us!
 
Dazed'n'confused said:
The funniest (once we'd gained control again) was when a friend and I encountered a shed with two sets of human feet walking in rather a wobbly fashion down a farm track....
The horses froze as we shouted "hello" to let the shed know that we were there (no room to pass!) and then they both span and legged it as the shed opened it's mouth (door) and a couple of strong lads emerged
Click to expand...

This is hilarious, the image of a talking shed has me in stitches :D
 
We live in a quiet edge of suburbia but definitely rural dead end single track road. Took daughter and pony in trailer to a local show at Easter in late April that year, returned before lunch to find absolute chaos in the road cars everywhere, struggled to pass them all to reverse trailer in front garden. Noticed a huge traffic jam of about 6 or 8 cars further down the road opposite the neighbours just where our field gate meets the road, so parked up and walked down with the pony to pop back in the field. Field is full of kids. Gateway is blocked by 2 cars so can't get pony in. Gate has 5 (fat) kids sitting on it so I told them to get off as it wasn't good for the hinges, much to the annoyance of loud woman who owned the kids, she was sat in one of the cars parked right in the gateway.

Turned out a local pub (not one we have ever frequented) had created a car treasure hunt, to find the location of little foam bunnies by following clues, and I think write down a number found on the bunny. The clue for finding ours was (ultimately) to look over the gate - and the 20 or so kids from the 5 or 6 cars had taken this literally and climbed over the gate into our hay field to search for this 2 inch bunny in our (very grassy as it was shut off for hay) field. Totally trashed the grass and the bunny was stuck on the inside of the gate, half of it was visible from outside the gate! I spotted it straight away and told everyone and got them to clear off. Re stuck the bunny on the top of the gate so all in view and phoned the pub to complain - they thought it didn't matter and couldn't see the problem!! Hubby later told me he had some people had come up through the fields to the back garden looking for it!
 
Hahaha :) so many funny things and so much public nudity! Re the shed thats hilarious. Reminded me that once while out with a friend on D we had a similar encounter with a row boat complete with 6 legs. Turns out some local kids went too far down river and got stuck. Once I stopped laughing at D's face I managed to give them directions to the farm so they could call home, no mobile then :).
 
3 years ago when I was carriage driving, the next door yard his tractor broke down and they couldn't move large round hay bales, they decided to move two by rolling them down a track from farm to field about 1/2 mile away!!!
I came across them they were ahead of me..no way to pass so I hung back with cart.
Unfortunately , they had overlooked the law of forward momentum ! On a slight incline downhill, the bales picked up steam and started moving quicker than intended.. I caught up with them down the track..2 hay bales in the ditch on the corner...runaway hay bales. Don't know how they got them out though
 
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